My Daughter Wants to Be Famous, How Do I Change Her Mind?

This too shall pass. :)

Get her into acting at a local theater. My girls do plays and really enjoy them. It's a lot of work but it will give you and her an idea if this is really her thing.

I'm sorry but you are really taking things a little too seriously. When my second son was 7 he wanted to be a police officer. Why? Because they get to eat donuts. He actually wrote a school essay stating this and I still have it! Relax, lead by example and let her have her fantasies!

Just about every 8 year old girl wants to be famous. It is normal - just go with it and enjoy her dancing and singing around the house. It is a phase and it may last a few years - But again very normal. My daughter is 10, she went through the I want to be famous stage at around 9 and although not as obsessed about it as she was when she was 9 she still fantasies about it. Normal part of growing up. I did it and I bet most of the moms on here had the same fantasy when they were 8,9,10!

Tell your daughter she just can't be famous, she has to be famous for something, what interests her about being on TV?

Many years ago when my daughter and her best friend were about 9 or 10 my daughter said she would never be a journalist, she wasn't good enough. I told her she could be anything she set her mind to, but it seemed she didn't believe me. So I wrote a famous news anchor in Los Angeles and explained the situation, hoping she would write or call my daughter to encourage her. Well, she called and invited us to come to the station for a tour! So I, my daughter, her friend and her mom all went and met the anchor and many others reporters who were there for the evening news, toured the studio and had a great time.

My daughter was encouraged and pursued journalism, and her friend messaged me on FB a couple of weeks ago and sent me a picture of her on her first day at her new job, as a production assistant at CNN. She said it all began the day we went on that tour, and has plans to go as far as she can in the field.

So, what you do is start encouraging your daughter now to keep doing what she does best, without discouraging her desire to be famous. The two may turn out to work hand in hand, and excelling at what you do is always a meaningful goal.

Use this as a great bonding and encouraging moment. I'm sure you and your husband can both tell her stories about 'wanting to be famous'.

Being famous means many things; rock star, actor, Mother Teresa, Condoleezza Rice, Sally Ride, Nancy Kerigan, etc.

It's important for kids & adults to follow their dreams, silly or not. If we can't dream then life will be boring. Encourage her, don't shoot her down.

Why can't she have this dream for a while. Kids often change their minds dozens of time through out their childhood.

Who knows, maybe she is the next Sandra Bullock or Katie Couric. There's nothing to say she isn't meant to do what she is wanting to do.

If this is truly a problem for you then you might start letting her hear stories about how docs make a lot of money, or some other career that would give her recognition and a good life income.

That sounds totally normal, and she will probably change her mind 100 times before she really knows! Heck, I'm 43 and I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up, lol. I really wouldn't think twice about it.

When my oldest daughter was 6ish, she wanted to be a "Barbie Cheerleader" when she grew up. Imagine how proud I was! Then she wanted to own a pet store. "Yay!" I thought "She wants to be a business owner!" So when I explained to her that she'd probably want to take business classes someday to learn how to run a business, she said, "Oh, no, I just like animals, I want to WORK at the pet store, not RUN it!" Oh well...

Don't outright tell your daughter "no, you don't want to be famous", but also don't dwell on this too much. She'll most likely outgrow it. It's really no big deal at this age.

BTW, my now 11yr old daughter now wants to be a graphic designer. I'm sure she'll go through a whole long list of careers before she graduates college. As long as there are no more Barbie Cheerleaders in our house, I'm fine with that!

If it were my daughter, I'd be taking her to tour a TV studio or a theater. I'm not sure it's not a meaningful goal for a child to shoot for. If your child said she wanted to fly to the moon, you'd giggle and think 'oh, that's cute,' but why not? There are women who become astrophysicists, pilots, and even astronauts. Why not encourage her dreams before the world finds more practical ways of crushing them? She'll find reasons to pick something else before she's even on college's doorstep, and if she doesn't and holds on to her dream for the next ten years, why not encourage it? There are lots of meaningful directions you could guide her in within that dream of TV and fame (and a lot to steer her away from!).

I think it's totally normal and nothing to worry about. As another poster said, the real question is what does she want to be known for? Does she want to act, sing, sports, dance, report the news, etc? All those things require talent for sure, but they also involve discipline and focus, which are good qualities to have.

There is nothing wrong with exploring those dreams. She wants to sing, have her join a chorus or take singing lessons. She wants to dance, sign her up for dance lessons. She wants to act, have her take lessons or try out for a local play. You get what I'm saying.

Now, if she was 16 yrs old and thinking that Kim Kardashian, Snooki and the OctoMom are great role models, then you have the right to be worried!

I think it's just a normal little-girl phase. It's not as though she's realistically planning her career at 8 years old.

You could use this as a good way to impart values, though -- talk about all the people who have become famous for their good works. This might be a good place to start: http://www.almaz.com/nobel/women.html

Really, though, you wouldn't tell a 4-year-old who wanted to become an astronaut or a ballerina that his/her career choices were unrealistic and that it was necessary to develop a fallback plan. Your daughter is still in that little-kid dreaming phase, but with a dollop of pop culture. She'll grow out of it.

How about you ask her WHAT she wants to be famous FOR?
Lady Gaga - Shock Music or Celene Dion - Talented Singer?
Miley Cirus - Throw away teen personality or Danny Osmond - Talent all over
Kim Kardashian - famous for being famous or Oprah Winfrey - famous for helping people and being an overall good person?
Bill Gates - famous for being smart or Charlie Sheen - famous for being crazy?

I think once you narrow down her inspirations and what she wants to be famous for you can then guide her better.

I would think this is very normal at 8 years old. If you asked the kids in her class what they wanted to be when they grew up, wouldn't you still get a lot of answers like ballerina, football player, rock star, spiderman. At this age, I would just encourage her and support her and keep introducing her to things.

My parents signed me up for softball when I was 7 or 8. Loved it! Played till I was 16. I also played tennis, soccer, swimming, and all of those when I was 10 or 12.

I really think it's your job to encourage her to try things and just be supportive. She's got plenty of time to "get the sillies out" and focus on something a bit more realistic and attainable. You never know, she might even be one of the rare ones who does become famous for something great, like discovering a cure for cancer.

Almost everyone goes through a phase of wanting to be famous or a movie/tv/rock star. Don't sweat it. She's eight. She dosn't need to have lifelong goals set yet.

I'm 37 and sometimes I still want to be famous (and I did when I was a kid!). Does she have any activities like dance, music, or drama classes as an outlet? What are her strengths in school (like take her to science camps, math camps, museums) so she can 'let her sparkle out' (a cute quote from a children's book). I agree with a lot of other posts - don't squash the 'famous' bug. She can be famous for so many things.
Famous Women on TV:
Christiane Amanpour
http://www.divinecaroline.com/tags/famous_women_on_tv

Famous doesn't have to mean excessive plastic surgery and a vapid personality. :)

Why is her dream and goals not meaningful? You should encourage her in whatever she says she wants to be.

Why don't you just ask that someday when she is rich and famous she use her wealth fame to do something to make the world a better place. There are celebritites who do meaningful things such as champion for the poor or for the environment. They lobby government for change, and sometimes even go into politics themselves. Make sure she understands that she needs to stay in school if she want to be sucsessful. Because she is only 8, she will likely change her mind 5 times before high school.

I think everyone dreams of fame in one way or another. I've always wanted to be a famous author someday, like Stephen King. It has never interfered with how I view or live life. Let her have her dreams. She'll only be young once.

Don't be to though but tell her how rare it is to just become famous. Tell her that there are other jobs that need to be done and if she's doing well in school she could make great money doing a more realistic job. She could still chose to follow her dream as long as she has a backup plan.
good luck.

There's nothing wrong with wanting to be on tv.
Weather forecasters do it all the time.
As far as famous goes, well there's famous and then there's infamous.
Lorena Bobbit or Octomom or Jerry Springer show 'famous' - um, not so good goals but she's probably not old enough for an explanation of some of THESE head line makers right now.
Performance art (actor/musician/comedian), athletics/sports, politician, being wealthy (Donald Trump), etc are more socially acceptable forms of fame.
She can work on feeling comfortable with public speaking - it will serve her well no matter where she ends up in life.
She can recite poems for the family and watch/read age appropriate news to keep up on current events.
You've got a lot of options for guiding her, so work with her desires instead of shooting her idea down.
It could evolve in some very interesting and worth while directions.

As she gets older (if this phase lasts) encourage her to "Study acting" and get very good at her craft so she can audition with confidence. Tell her to start saving money so she can travel to auditions one day. Do not say, "Your chances are slim" but say, "You have to work hard to excel in order to carve out your niche in such a competitive field. Like any other job, there are only a handful of people who just magically 'make it' through nepotism-You're gonna have to work. Also, you'll need to keep up your other skills because many performers support themselves by other means before they 'get famous'".

This way you're the voice of reason who believes in her, not just a nay-sayer. There are good and bad personalities in every field. She can be a good person and an actress. And she may get "famous" or she may lose interest, but discouraging her will only make it worse :)

Like others have said, there's nothing wrong with wanting to be famous...just famous for what? There's nothing wrong with wanting to be on TV, like an actress or a news reporter. Unfortunately, nowadays, people seem to be famous for, well, nothing. Like the Kardashians, or Paris Hilton, or Snookie. They had "reality" shows that they starred in that made them household names, but it's not like they are exceptionally talented or have really accomplished anything. I would ask her what she would like to be famous for, and I don't think it is too early to point the difference between someone who is famous for being a reality TV star vs. someone who is famous for their accomplishments. Wanting to be a singer or an actress isn't any less meaningful than wanting to be a teacher or a doctor. If it's really not in the cards for her, reality will sink in soon enough. She's only 8, right now she thinks anything is possible. My cousin's daughter is almost 11 and has gone through all the same notions. If she really has a plausible goal, I would be talking to her about how much hard work it takes to get there, and then letting her try out things like dancing or singing to see if it is truly something she feels some passion for and might stick with - or if it just a passing fancy. I would also make sure she is not watching shows like the Kardashians or Teen Mom and getting the wrong message that this is how one becomes "famous."

She is 8 and in her mind she wants to be in the spotlight and have praise heaped upon her. You could enroll her in dance and acting classes. Let her know that these are foundations towards fame. If she tries them and likes or dislkes them you know that this is not for her.

I once remembered about her age or so that I wanted to do plays or be on Broadway in shows. My dad said to be pointblank that I would never make it. That was a real blow to my ego and it has remained with me all these years later. He could have said that there are things that look great on the outside but the hard work is behind the scenes and what goes on behind the scenes is not what a young girl/woman needs to do to get ahead.

So encouarge your daughter to do well and to think about all the possibilities out there to be famous like doctor, lawyer, scientist, teacher, caregiving. Otherwise she will hang onto this dream/notion longer than she should.

Remember she is only 8 so you have another 12 years to work with her and to guide her in the right direction.

The other S.

PS I do a lot of behind the scenes things at my television station. When we do student news it is chaotic but it looks great in front of the camera.
I also sew and make many types of clothing soon to be costumes.

I think that just because someone is famous doesn't mean they value wealth and fame more than anything else.

I think we need to let our kids dream. Enough time when they get older to put in the the sweat and decide if it's what they REALLY want!

My soon-to-be 11-year old has always wanted to be famous. A famous actress, dancer or singer. We've enrolled her in all kinds of classes for those things. She's been to acting auditions. She found she hates acting auditions! I've explained that you don't just "magically" get a part, you have to audition.

I have encouraged her to follow her dreams and to explore the things she loves. What if she becomes a famous dancer? What's wrong with that? Is that not a meaningful goal?

Encourage your child to try those things now. We went to a comic-con in costume and everyone wanted to get their picture taken with us. We were stopped over and over for pictures. My daughter HATED it! We had to laugh and let her know that it would happen to her everywhere if she became famous. I know that has given her something to think about with the "being famous" thing.

Your daughter sounds like a great kid. Let her dream and explore her dreams. Either she won't like the "reality" or she will love it! Either way, it's her life and she should be allowed to do what makes her happy when she grows up.

There's nothing wrong with a healthy dose of narcissism at a young age.

Her dreams are young and immature and based upon social media, not reality and hard work.

Usually when my kids have wild dreams, I will respond for a while with, Yes, I want you to be famous too. Famous for straight A's, and a clean room and tidying up the house, etc. etc. whatever her chores are.

Just keep responding with adequate and well deserved praise, not phony praise. And constantly educate her about how hard celebrities have it with paparazzi, no privacy, etc.

This sounds like a little phase.
GL!

This is from a religious perspective . . .I encourage my children to always seek God's guidance and path FIRST, and the rest will fall into place.

After all, what good is it to gain the whole world but lose your soul (paraphrasing)?

At her age of course it all looks fun and attractive. She can't possibly know the negative side to it . . .

I wouldn't lecture or fuss at her about it whatsoever, but I would use it as an opportunity to discuss Biblical principles (or life principles if you're not religious).

She is precious and God sent her here with a unique set of gifts. It's her job to find them and use them for the good of others. And maybe fame is part of all that - but if it isn't she is not diminished in any way.

JMO.

Instead of trying to change her mind, just be reflective on the fame she's enamored with and what she sees. Encourage her to shine in her own, positive ways, and talk to her about different kinds of 'fame' that aren't typically noticed, especially the magazine articles on people who make a difference in their communities/altrusists. Instead of trying to snuff her interest, which likely is not grounded in any reality anyway, expand on it. Show interest in the good deeds of others; continue to show interest in her whole person as I'm sure you are already doing.

Unfortunately, it's fairly typical that kids these days are more likely to regard 'being famous' as a more important goal than becoming, say, a doctor or astronaut or something requiring practice, study and skill. Fame seems to be an 'easy' goal. (Perhaps because our standards for what qualifies as worthy of attention seem to have sunk.) You can also discuss how fleeting it is...

Keep up good conversations around the tv shows and celeb culture that she is interested in, get her involved in some drama classes (they are fun, no matter if you never make it big!) and know that she is *still* very young.:)

Good for her. Give her a list of famous people - the president (they are all famous, doesn't have to be the current one), the supreme court justices, Jacques Cousteau, Hillary Clinton, Margaret Thatcher, Charles Darwin, Albert Einstein, Bill Gates, Bono. What is wrong with famous?

Give her time to grow up. Right now she doesn't even realize the realm of possibilities out there. Try to expose her to more than just tv and every day things. I bring my GD to work with me several times a year. She loves it and she is learning how to work in an office. At 9 she can fax, photocopy, answer the phone and help with filing. She keeps saying she wants to be me - I keep correcting her and telling her she doesn't want to be me, she wants to be the boss. Point being, she is being exposed to other things and that is opening up her small world and giving her a lot to think about.

If he doesn't already, your hubby should take advantage of "take your child to work day" and take her to work. Open her eyes to what's out there. And if you're employed outside the home you should do the same.

You don't need to "get" her to have more meaningful goals. Time and maturity will do that for her. She's eight years old. Whatever goals she develops at this age are highly unlikely to stick - they will probably change about 4,000 times before she really starts thinking about any type of "career" goals. Why would you want to pigeonhole her into any specific thing now, anyway?

My sons, now 17 and 13, have variously wanted to be professional football players, professional baseball players, artists, writers, engineers, architects, rock stars, actors, teachers, and lord knows what else.
Let your daughter have her fantasies about fame and fortune - they are totally normal at her age. And who knows, maybe she'll end up famous and on TV after all.