My Seven Month Old Won't Sleep!!!!!

Updated on January 28, 2008
S.G. asks from Santa Rosa, CA
49 answers

At first it started out that she was waking up every two hours (naturally). Everyone told me that she'd sleep through the night when she hits ten pounds;...nope. Then "when you start feeding her rice cereal she'll get more full and sleep through the night"; (she is breastfed majority of the time and I produce ample amounts of milk)...nope. "When she starts sleeping in her own crib she'll sleep through the night"....nope. (Maybe one or two times; once for 11 hours! and once for 6 hours). I guess those were just teasers.
Anyway, but the worst part is she won't even take any freakin naps!!! I even tried supplementing her with formula for one feeding in the middle of the day to make her more full and want to sleep; but to no avail. You'd think she'd be so exhausted by the end of the day her little body would HAVE to sleep! But nope, she'll take a nap for a half an hour, sometimes 45 minutes or so, and be WIDE awake, smiling and squeeling and READY to get up. She'll fall asleep in the car or take little 10 minute catnaps, but will be up as soon as she hears or feels any movement at all.
I've tried soft/white noise, i've tried darkness, i've tried a little music aquarium with and without the lights on. Nothing works!!!
Of course, we'll get the occassional two hour nap when i'm working and someone's babysitting her. But most of the time my babysitters are shocked to see that mommy was right, she really doesn't nap.
What can I do??? Have I exhausted all my efforts?? Should I just come to terms that she is just the kind of baby that doesn't need much sleep??
I'm exhausted, from no good sleep and practically no breaks in the day....help...please.
ps....daddy helps when he gets home from work, but that time is pretty much spend cooking dinner and cleaning.

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T.C.

answers from Sacramento on

My son did the same thing when he was a baby. On a doctor visit we found out that he had unusually large tonsils and basically it was causing sleep apnea. He would wake up because he couldn't get enough air! My advise is to talk to the doctor and see if there is a medical condition causing her sleeplessness.

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R.M.

answers from San Francisco on

Just wanted to let you know I joined, JUST FOR YOU. :) Good luck with the sleeping I already gave you my advice on the phone.

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G.W.

answers from San Francisco on

my grand daughter is the same and she is 15 mths now and still the same way,we have excepted it....I feel for my daughter tho she is still breast feeding and getting up many times a night....good luck....G.W.

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A.C.

answers from San Francisco on

Sorry to hear about your baby girl.

What worked for us is the Babywise book. We have two kids; an 8 y/o and an 11 month old. Both of our babies slept through the night between 8-12 weeks. You must be diligent with her schedule for feeding and nap/sleep times. Also, limit all stimulation (TV, music, flashing lights, toys that make noise...etc) or it is harder for the baby to fall asleep and stay asleep. Sometimes babies wake up after 40 minutes because of over-stimulation, temperature (too hot or cold), or something is making them uncomfortable like gas or stuck in an awkward position. 40 minutes is when their body switches from light sleep to deep sleep. It's necessary to let them learn to settle back down to sleep without your help. So if she wakes up, don't go into her room right away. Give her 10-15 minutes being by herself and she might fall back to sleep. Also, her room must be as dark as possible. This will help her sleep better and stay asleep too. If she's cold, get a space heater. Sometimes if it's really cold, they will wake up and won't be able to fall back to sleep. This winter has been especially cold that it's even happened to me!

Here's a typical day for our 11 month old: She wakes up typically at 8am. First thing, she eats her breakfast which takes about an hour with burping and then plays for about a half hour. We dim the lights at 9:30 am and make sure all the burps are out and diaper is dry then we put her down at 10am. She usually gets 1.5-2 hours. She wakes up around noon. We feed her, she has playtime, then get her ready for her nap around 1:30pm and put her in her crib at 2pm. She sleeps for another 1.5 to 2 hours. We have her awake from 4pm-8 or 8:30 pm. She sleeps from 8 or 9pm until 8am. Of course this is ideal, but not everyday it goes exactly this way. However, she gets at least 13-16 hrs per day depending on how tired she is. It's a routine for us now, which means we can be a little more flexible with the schedule (only a half hour variance but not more than that). If you're starting out and trying to get your baby to sleep through the night, you have to be more strict with what time you feed her and put her down for her naps. Babies need naps and good sleep in order to retain information, which will enable them to learn quickly, to read, to speak and communicate at a much earlier age. My 8 y/o always slept in her crib for her naps. She started reading at 2 1/2. She read simple words then was able to read preschool material at 3. She was able to snap her fingers and whistle at 3 1/2. Now, she's reading 5-6th grade material and is in the 2nd grade (born in December or she would be in 3rd grade). It's all due to the sleep she got as a baby. Our 11 month old is able to communicate as well. She can say more, milk, burp, all done, & night-night.

Scheduling regulates her metabolism. This way she knows when it's time to eat, be awake and when to sleep. As her parent, you have to guide her and not let her guide you on when she's hungry. Her hunger patterns depend on when you decide to feed her. If you feed her every 2 hours, she'll wake up every 2 hours and expect a feeding. Nursing all day long will not help regulate her metabolism. She should be on a 3.5-4 hour routine. So I would suggest spreading out the times you feed her (if you haven't) and make sure she's full at every feeding. Pump out your milk if you have trouble with engorgement. Sometime bottlefeeding her breast milk will help you know how much she's actually getting as well. If you get the daytime schedule going and keep to it, the rest should follow at night. If she should wake up at night, change her diaper and try putting her down without nursing. After a few nights, she might get the hint that she won't get fed and her body will get used to not having any food at night. If you do feed her, just know she'll expect it at the same time the next night. You can limit the time you nurse her if it gets closer to your morning wake up time, so she won't have a full feeding. Make sure the middle of the night feedings are quiet and dark. She will learn that this is night time and it is time to rest and not be awake.

Well, I do hope this helps. If you can, get the book. Sleep is very important and I hope Babywise can help you do this for your baby girl. I don't believe that only some babies can get good sleep. If you follow the guidelines of eat, wake and sleep and having a set feeding time and making sure your baby is full at each meal, you can have your baby sleeping through the night and having naps each day. God bless and good luck!

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K.S.

answers from San Francisco on

I hear you, sister! Your story is mine! My baby girl is 5 mo. old and exactly the same!! She won't take naps, she wakes every two hours all night. I've tried everything! I wish I had advice for you but I'm in the same boat. If you get any great advice that actually works let me know! I'll keep checking in on you and hoping you find something that works!

1 mom found this helpful
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E.S.

answers from San Francisco on

I have a wonderful sleep book to recommend. It's called "Healhty Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Marc Weissbluth. It was recommended to me 4 years ago when my first was about 5 months old and I was having the same no-napping, night-waking problems as you. You will find from reading the book that she is probably overtired and when they're overtired it's harder for them to fall asleep and stay asleep. The more sleep they get, the better and easier they fall and stay asleep. The author talks alot about the importance of sleep and gives lots of advice for all kinds of issues ~ many real-life examples which I found very helpful. Crib sleeper, family bed, crying it out or not, he covers it all. My third child is 15 months now, and that book (my sleep bible) is still right next to the glider. I nursed all three of mine and none slept fully through the night until I stopped nursing, but all typically only woke once per night (maybe twice).
My only other advice comes from the book in case you want to try right away...basically, the earlier you put your baby to bed at night the longer she should sleep, so you start by moving her bedtime earlier in about 20-30 min increments until it's about 5:30-6:00pm (this may be hard if you're working?). But, the earlier the better for bedtime at this age. Two naps, the first should begin no longer than about 1-1/2-2 hours after she wakes in the morning (my daughter used to wake around 6:45am and would go down for a morning nap about 8:30am). Then an afternoon nap around 1:00. Once the night sleep starts consolidating with the earlier bedtime, the naps will follow.
Anyway, hope that helps a little, I would highly recommend the book though ~ it solved all of our sleep issues with each child at each stage (you know they're constantly changing it up on you!) :) Good Luck!

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S.M.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi, S.--Sleep stuff is just so hard, isn't it? I'm sure you've tried everything, but I'll mention a couple of things anyway. Rather than feeding to make you daughter feel full (I read a couple of things that said this is an old wives' tale, saying that feeling full will make the babies sleepy), how about activity? Is she rolling over and/or crawling a lot during the day? Is she using her hands, wiggling her toes, laughing, bouncing, reaching--using any muscles she can to 'work out' and be active? I know this is true for toddlers (I have a two-year old), so I'm wondering if it would help the younger set too. Good luck to you! I hope you all find some peace soon. --S. M.

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D.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi,
This happened to my daughter. The doctor found out that my milk was not enoughfor her and she was crying every two hours not getting enough sleep. I felt sleep deprived. We had to switch to several formulas before we found one that was good for her. Just like you. I tried all different things. Good luck.

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J.M.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi S.,

I feel for you as I can totally relate to your situation. We have a wonderful 8 month old boy and my husband & I both work full time with busy schedule and regular business travel demand (my husband more so than me). I don't know of anything you can do to dramatically change the situation, but just want to share a few thoughts:

1. In general making peace of a situation that you have to live with may help to reduce the mental stress that comes on top of the physical demand. In my case, I was slightly insomniac before the baby came; now with the baby, I just have to stop expecting decent sleep all together. Surprisingly I found myself feeling better with the peace of not expecting sleep than living with the anxiety of losing sleep.
2. Kids do change, by themselves. Seeing many examples of same parents end up raising very different kids. I do believe it's more nature than nurture. And nature has a better chance to thrive if nurture stays out of the way. She maybe this way today, but she will for sure to change tomorrow. So there's hope :).
3. As long as your baby is happy & healthy and her pediatrician confirms that, she is fine and probably should be left alone with her own schedule. I grew up in a kindergarden in China where a very fix structure was applied to all kids. I was a kid who needed far less sleep than my peer but was strongly "encoraged" to take more naps and sleep longer than I'd wanted. I was very young but the experience still left a clear, unpleasant memory with me. I'm glad your baby girl was born in a much relaxed enviroment where she will not be asked to conformed.
4. Hire or ask for help if you can, with housework. If you can hire someone to do the cooking and cleaning, you can use the time to play with your baby, spend with your husband or take a nap. We hired a weekend help who comes every Sunday to clean and cook a meal or two. It really helps as my husband & I can take turns to take naps or do whatever we want while one of us is looking after the baby. Knowing that I'm guaranteed with a few hours of "my time" every other week is a great mental relief.

Good luck with everything.
J. M

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E.G.

answers from San Francisco on

Read the book called Healthy Sleep Habits=Healthy Baby. It is really helpful and may change some of your thoughts on sleep.

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M.S.

answers from San Francisco on

My 14 month old daughter is the same way. She takes 40 min-1 hour naps and wakes refreshed and ready to go. It's just the way she is unlike her older brother who needed 2-3 hour naps everyday. She is just an active person on the go. If I need to quiet her body or get housework done I just strap her on my back in an Ergo carrier. She loves seeing what I am up to and I never worry about what she is getting in to.

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B.P.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi, I'm in the same boat you are! I have a 3 1/2 month old boy. He's mine and my husbands' first child. He takes 3 or 4 30 min. cat naps through out the day, and sleeps about 4 hours at night, eats, and then sleeps for another 2 or 3 hours. He's a very happy baby and eats strictly breast milk either by bottle during the day, or by breast at night. I wish I had the answer to how to get them to sleep longer, but I don't. Please tell me if you figure something out. By the way, he has never slept longer than 5 hours at night, and a two hour nap once during the day. B.

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S.M.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi S.,
Sleep problems and trying to move, bless your heart!! No wonder you are exhausted!

I agree with a couple of the other moms - get the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Dr. Marc Weissbluth. It was a great help to us when my daughter was a baby!!!! It has info for up to school ages (and I think even teenage too?). Part of the problem for your daughter with nighttime sleep is probably the lack of good daytime sleep since she is not napping well (or at all!). One thing I remember from this book is that according to this doctor, sleep in a car seat, stroller, etc. is not "good quality" sleep and will actually interfere with good sleep habits.

Best of luck to you and your family with the sleeping AND the move!! Let us know what happens....

Blessings,

S.

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D.W.

answers from San Francisco on

S., welcome to my life! My oldest, now 10, has never been a sleeper. I know you are exhausted, but I suggest making it all as easy on yourself as possible by changing routines to reflect the reality. If that means you give up and put the baby in your bed, so be it. You need as much sleep as you can get! When you realize you have a child that doesn't conform to the expectations of those around you is also when you are free to realize that listening to their advice is worthless, and you are completely free to forge your own road. A burden and a blessing, really, but it is what it is.

Some things to watch for:

If she does start sleeping for longer periods, be ware of the possibility of regression. This is common. But, with a nursing baby, what you do NOT want is for her to get in the habit of eating at those times again. So, at that point, make sure it is daddy who tends to her. If it's you, she'll want the comfort of the breast, but she shouldn't need it (we didn't do this ourselves, we didn't know about it, we thought he was hungry, but the baby really shouldn't be).

She should start sleeping through the night eventually, just not on the schedule other babies did it. Keep everything flexible, so that you can take advantage of it as soon as she is ready.

Be sure you sign up for a preschool that doesn't require a nap period. That would be asking for trouble.

--

The thing about children is they are who they are and there is no formula that speaks to every child. Long run, there are huge advantages to being someone who runs on less sleep: most great leaders in business and politics have been that way. Simply put, when you sleep less, you have more hours available in your day. So, some day, this will be an asset for her.

But you still have to survive her infancy and toddlerhood. Sigh. It isn't easy. I know it.

Best of luck.

PS - Since my second child sleeps like a textbook, I can say with 100% certainty, now, that my son's sleep habits had NOTHING to do with my parenting. It really just "is" the child, in almost all cases, I believe.

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L.T.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi maybe I'm to late w/tip. But beleieve me if I say I know your situation very well!!!
I was a hard working single mom for the first 5 years. He started doing this just after he started walking and It was a nightmare for me to have him crawl in my bed or just stay near me staring at my face for looong periods. Or for the worst, bring toys on my bed and play w/them in the middle of the night.
Well ... a warmth bath an a nice meal after, helped. Also, I found out he had strong allergies and normal breathing was difficult sometimes, I got a thicker pillow that will keep his head a little more upward so breathing will be easier, and to finish the sleeping therapy I would rubb his feet with eucalypthus rubb or vicks, in a shiatsu manner, put some socks on and lots of kisses and cuddle in helped
Listo!!! he wanted to go to bed inmediatelly, and enlonged the sleeping periods little by little every day now he is 12 and well.... now its a pain to wake him up!!!
(Please mind my spelling Spamish is not my first language) Good luck

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L.T.

answers from San Francisco on

Well if she is a happy baby without her frequent naps and won't sleep through the night- then I would not worry about it- unfortunately, it only makes mommy and daddy tired.
Keep on breastfeeding- the whole idea about adding formula and cereals does not work. Sometimes babies with too much stimulation seem to have trouble sleeping or falling asleep.
For example having the TV on all day or radio on all day it turns into too much stimuli. Do you drink a lot of caffeine or eat a lot of chocolate?

Wish you the best!
LT

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A.L.

answers from San Francisco on

My babies did not sleep through the night until after 1 year. Each child is different.

They might be really hungry. or you might be just acting like a pacifier.

I had trouble with naps and a mom of 4 helped me. I always like seasoned moms. Try keeping her up longer between morning rise and the feeding, when you have satisfied her hunger (my daughter was up by the hour through the night I walked in my sleep and learned by the second to make her finish eating as she snacked all night). Take her to her bed and pat her until she gets to a really relaxed mood. Many of us can't stand to hear them cry but sometimes they are waking you up because they just don't know how to fall asleep. I had an hour or two torture the first time I would pat her to calm her than walk out of the room and let her go to sleep. She cried, then I would sit out of the door and almost cry myself. Every time it got shorter and shorter and then I retrained her to nap better.

This helped at night.

Good luck, it does get better.

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V.T.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi S.,
I am a Mom of three: 6, 4 and 22 mos. I was told at the beginning that babies need to be "trained" to sleep. And most importantly, the less the baby sleeps, the less the baby sleeps. Meaning, if a child goes without a nap during the day, he/she is less likely to have a restful sleep that night. I bought the book, "Baby Whisperer" (now there is a website http://www.babywhisperer.com) and it was a perfect tool to help me teach my babies how to sleep. Good luck!

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K.T.

answers from San Francisco on

Welcome to the world of a very active child! My daughter who is now 6 was the same. She never took naps as everyone said she should even when she was very young. The positive part about this--is she is full of life and energy and lot of ideas and projects always swimming through her brain--probably will be a very productive adult. Negative--that mom is exhausted, and later instituted a "quiet time" where I popped in a video to a least get a bit of a nap myself--even though before they were born I swore I would never let my kids watch TV. So much for the "never say never"--kids always come with surprises.

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J.J.

answers from San Francisco on

Two great books that can help you with sleep issues:

On Becoming Baby Wise by Gary Ezzo and Robert Buchnam
Secrets of the Baby Whisperer by Tracy Hogg and Melinda Blau

They offer similar strategies on setting up routines and how to deal with issues as they arise. It really works, just give it some time. Good luck!

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A.A.

answers from Sacramento on

Well I hate to tell you this... Maybe your little one dosent need alot of sleep. I was in this same place with my oldest daugheter. We named her the ever waking child. I had to really keep her busy both mentally and phyiscally. She tried to give up her afternoon nap...of about 30 mins..at 9mos. I resorted to driving her around until she fell asleep. (that was before gas prices were so high) Just go with the flow and try to keep her a schedule everyday, that might help. Dont stress out about it either. My daughter didnt sleep through the night until she was in preschool at 3 years.
She is a reall good sleeper now, but at 7 years old dosent fall asleep until 9 oclock at night. I know some people thinks that too late but she is healthly and doest great in school. Every child is different ...some sleep through the night at the start and some dont. Good luck and it will all work out in the long run.....

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O.G.

answers from San Francisco on

Dear S.,
It sees to me that you've tried almost everything you possibly could to get you baby to sleep, but the fact is that there are some children that just don't do it. I know from example, when I was a single parent, I was raising an ADD/ADHD child who NEVER slept, then when I got married had two more and they didn't like to sleep either but they weren't ADHD. Like you, after trying so many different things, the doctor told me to just let the baby play or cry and they would eventually go to sleep. For my youngest that happened at 2 1/2 yrs old, my older one never got it. I also have two grandchildren that I care for and it wasn't until I took them to the allergist and found that they had allergies to milk, including their mothers milk so when changing their milk, that made to what I consider a BIG change.(ok so maybe a 1/2 to 1 hr nap). After their teething and I was able to get their allergies under control (which by the way many doctors do not believe in little ones having allergies let alone sinus, and we proved them wrong) did they start sleeping and taking 2 naps per day for the most. (they are 3 and 1 1/2). Not sure if this will help you, but just wanted to let you know, I feel for you.

Ps... and if at all possible, you have someone who can watch the baby for just ONE night, take advantage of it and get the much needed rest you can.

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N.T.

answers from San Francisco on

My son (now 2 1/2) was the same way......no matter what I did this boy didn't like to sleep.....drove me nuts.I finally tried the cry it out method.....he still woke up once a nite, but that was a heck of a lot better than every couple of hours. It's hard to hear them cry at first, but trust me...you need your sleep!
Hope that helps!

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C.O.

answers from San Francisco on

I just "sleep trained" my 8 month old. I liked our technique:
Night 1: Put him down and he cried 25 min with us checking every 5 min. During the night when he woke every 2 hours like he usually did, I breastfed him.
Night 2: Put him down and he cried 5 min. During the night, I let him cry the first time he woke and then when he awoke later I breastfed him.
Future nights, he stopped crying when I put him down, and I just kept skipping a feeding session during the night (he would cry a bit, and I'd check every 5 min). After about a week and a half he slept through the night (8pm-6am) for the first time! He's now sleeping quite well, often through the night, or sometimes just a little fussing in the early morning. I'm so glad I did it. I was going crazy too! And don't forget to check, our little one was stuck under the bumper one night....

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B.C.

answers from Sacramento on

Dear S. , I feel your pain!! My daughter who was our first child was just like yours, very very "healthy" and wanted to be involved in everything at every minute of every hour of every day. She would take quick 10-30 min. naps during the day cause she didn't want to miss out on anything. I remember that I would complain that I could never get anything done in the house cause she was sooo active. Well, I hate to tell you but she is now 4yrs old and is still the same. I still have to force her to lay down to get her nap otherwise she would keep going if I just let her. I did find that when she got a bit older 18 mo. I was able to get her to nap for 1 full hr., but I had to do put her down later in the afternoon. We tried putting her in her own crib, she never liked being by herslef so we had a community bed until she was 2. This allowed all three of us to get a lot more sleep at night cause she felt safe and slept the whole night. I don't know if I would recommend that cause its not for everybody. We are however; are doing the same thing with my 10 mo. old boy cause he too does not like to be alone. I guess what you sometimes have to decide on is which is the worse of the two evils and go with what your heart says on some of these decisions. You are her mommy and ultimately will know what is best for her and your familiy's sanity. I'm sure I don't have to tell you that when we are tired our decision making is more rash and might not be the same if we were better rested. Good luck and you are welcome to pick my brain about my experiences with an active child anytime.
ps we too moved when she was 8 month old. And are doing it again in a couple of weeks. Its very challenging but this too shall pass. :o)

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K.C.

answers from San Francisco on

Hello! I completely feel you on the sleep thing. Our daughter was sleeping through early on, and then she's made a bad habit of waking up every few hours...esp when she was teething! She's now 8 months and we're lucky if she only wakes up once/twice a night. I was following this book called "The Contented Little Baby" by Gina Ford. It really helped me establish a good nap schedule for the baby. She's supposed to sleep for 2 hours in the afternoon, but tends to average about 1-1.5 Take a look at the book and see if maybe you could try the schedule...

Just know that eventually she'll settle into a schedule. I totally feel for you!

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C.C.

answers from Sacramento on

I have a 2 1/2 year old who had some trouble in this area. Not quite as much as you, but a bit. Best advice i was given was to introduce some "white noise" into the room. Could be that your house is too quiet so she's waking up or sleeping too lightly. We had a fan for a long time as white noise but finally went out and purchased a white noise machine (from Sharper Image or Brookstone). We just turn it on and run it while he sleeps. It muffles out any outside noises, bumps, cars driving by, our snoring, and such.
Oh, and another thing that we found kept him asleep was a pacifier. He woke up "sucking" but if he slept with a binkie in his mouth or nearby he would pop it back in and go right back to sleep.
Good luck and hope this helps!
-C. C.

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H.F.

answers from Sacramento on

Just wanted to say that I too have a loved one who doesn't need very much sleep. He was a cat napper like your daughter, took 2 20 minute naps (if I ws lucky) until 7 months, then cut out the second nap entirely and settled on 1 1 hour nap. He is happy as can be even when he goes without his nap... wakes at 6am every morning (or earlier) and goes down between 8 and 9pm. So a total of 10-11 hours of sleep at most. Also, he just started sleeping all the way through the night. He waas waking 1-2 times up until 1 year (would just pat his back and he'd drift back to sleep). Good luck. I know how hard it is. Trust me, there will be a day when your daughter sleeps through the night.

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C.M.

answers from Sacramento on

That sounds exactly like my little girl! She's 13 months old now and has the same sleeping patterns that you described, and she too is a extremely happy baby. I was glad to hear that someone else out there is in the same situation because I can't help thinking that I'm doing something to prevent her from having good sleeping habits (first-time mom guilt trip and hearing stories from grandparents and experienced moms about how well their babies slept don't help either!). So, I have no advice for you (sorry), but I just wanted to say thanks for posting and hang in there.

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M.F.

answers from Sacramento on

Hi S.
I don't know if this will help at all, but my daughter was 18 months before she slept through the night.
She was our first born and like you we tryed everything.
We decided to take her out of her cot and put her into a single bed and she never looked back.
We had the odd bad night to start with where she got straight out and screamed at the door, but we just left her for a while then see gave in and went back to bed.
I think it was a battle of will's that we won thank goodness, but she did settle at bed time and sleep a full night quite quickly after that.
She is now 25yrs with a son of her own.
It is hard at the time, I remender thinking will we ever have a normal nights sleep again, but now I would give anything to go back and have her small again.

Good luck

Chris

I am 49yrs and I live in England

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N.M.

answers from Fresno on

Hi,
I read your story and it sounds just like my first born. He was like that since the day he was born. He didn't sleep well even at the hospital, and he was in the room with me the whole time. He was just like your happy daughter, not needing to take naps and still being his happy old self. It got to me really bad, because I was still pretty much newly married, and moved to a new area and I didn't really have a lot of friends in that area, and I seemed to be the first to have a kid out of my friends, even though at the time I was already 24. My husband worked night check and was gone most of the time, so I didn't really have much help from him in the beginning. I didn't seek help even though I did complain alot. And I never told the doctor and he never asked me. I thought that that was just normal for him. After all, each child had their ways. So I let this go on for a long time, and I wasn't too happy with myself as a person. I needed my prescious sleep badly. When I had my second son, when my firt one was 3 and a hf, a friend recommended a book to me about healthy sleeping habits. I found out that babies and children need a lot of sleep. So I put him to bed at 7pm. He wasn't happy about that and he kept on getting out of bed and cried alot. It took a couple of wks, because he is just as stubborn as I, and it was very frustrating, and difficult, because a part of you wants to go and hug him and make him feel better again, but I knew that I needed to do it and finally it worked. He is now six yrs old, and pretty much sleeps through the night, unless he needs to go to the bath room or isn't feeling well. Since you are going to be moving soon, I would wait until after you settle in to do something about it, because I know for a fact that it takes a while for the kids especially to get used to their new surroundings. And then you just have to be tough and not give in. I also noticed that my son didn't like it to be totally dark so we got him one of those small lights that you plug into the so that that it wasn't totally dark and we played some music classic baby music for him and that helped somewhat too. Good luck.

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D.B.

answers from San Francisco on

This is my experience. It is a fable that babies sleep 20 hours a day. I know many that sleep at the most 8 hours. Some people,babies included, just have a lot more energy than others. There are ways to calm babies with energy but it is hard to explain in an email. Sounds like yours doesn't need calming. My now 34 year old son never took naps, unless I sat and rocked him. Then I had to nap with him laying in my lap. If I moved he was immediately awake. I would tell the baby sitter to keep awake during the day so he would be more likely to sleep during the day. It may have helped a little when the sitter actually did it.
D.

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E.M.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi there, I also have a 7 month old baby girl who all of a sudden decided she wants to wake up in the middle of the night to eat, talk and roll. she just started doing this after she recieved her 6month shots. That probably has nothing to due with it but she was sleeping through the night before that. She also takes little "power naps" during the day but not long enough for me to do the things I have to do around my home. She is also bottle fed and this girl eats 6OZ of formula so she has a full belly when she goes to sleep. I know how your are feeling and I hope we both can get an answer to this little madness.

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L.C.

answers from Fresno on

Here is one for you, it may sound odd. You have tried everything that is quite to help her sleep. Have you tried something louder. when my boys were little I was the mommy that vacumed under their bed when they were asleep, had the radio on lound but not to loud, had friends over, had the TV on suround sound. Their father and his friends had the loud 4x4 trucks that they were always working on or playing with. The noise wasn'tto loud but my kids new what I was doing as they were sleeping. just an idea
good luck

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C.C.

answers from San Francisco on

Your baby girl is most likely overtired. The less they sleep the less they sleep. And it has very little to do with what or how they're fed. Once they are in a poor sleep cycle it is difficult to break. With some keeping a strict routine/schedule helps. Keep trying, you'll be glad you did. And frankly, some kids don't require as much sleep as others, but you should check with your pediatrician for the minimum acceptable amount of sleep. Hang in there. I've been there, its one of the biggest parental challanges my husband and I faced. I've had five and only one has slept through the night at seven months. Your moving has probably heightened the frustration, which your baby senses. It will get better. Take care and good luck with your move and your little girl.

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D.K.

answers from Sacramento on

Hi S.,
I have two little ones (2 yr old and 8 month old). I breastfed my first and am breastfeeding my second. First, breastmilk goes through baby much quicker than formula. Also, when you breastfeed it's much more than nutrition for the baby...it is also comfort for her. My 1st son rarely ever nap..just like your daughter. I suspect it's because she does not know how to nap on her own or is used to rocking, being breastfed to sleep, or whatever way she falls to sleep. With my second child, I tried to teach him to fall to sleep on his own without any aid from me. I put him in the crib awake. Of course, he will cry at first, but I stay with him and comfort him with my words and patting him or touching his little body. I did not do this until he was 6 months and it took time (he also did not nap very well prior to my "training" him). He eventually slept 1 to 2 hours straight during naptimes and he even went to sleep without complaining in the crib! The key is consistency. I will confess I was not always consistent, so he is back to wanting to be with me and comfort nursing throughout the night. If you try to many different methods and not for long, the baby will be confused and nothing will work. Some babies are just good sleepers, some need to some help learning how to sleep. That's the lesson I learned with my first child. I also think that when some babie fall asleep in someone's arms instead of on their own they are aware when they are no longer in those warm arms...when they know how to fall asleep on their own in their crib, they stay asleep longer because there was no warm body in the first place hence they don't expect it when they stir a little bit (they just fall back asleep) as oppose to falling asleep with aid and the aid is gone...they wake up sooner. Hope that helps. I found the "Baby Whisperer" book really helped me. With any baby book, it's just a tool and gives you more ideas. Take it with a grain of salt, some moms do not like it because they feel the author is condescending...I think she has some good ideas. Good luck! I hope things work out. I will need to start being consistent with my son again as he is now 8 months, can crawl and is pulling himself up...so it's a little more of a struggle.

~dk

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G.J.

answers from San Francisco on

Is she eating solids yet? That was the turning point for both of mine. I know Dr.'s like to keep them on the bottle as long as psossoble, but personally I think they are stillb 'hungry' by the time they reach 4 or 5 months. I can't sleep when I am hungry, and neither can a baby. I would feed her thins like very soft steamed zucchini, mashed potatoes etc and see if it helps. Kids ate solids for hundreds of years at a very early age, so how bad could it be>

Gen

Gen

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G.E.

answers from Sacramento on

Hi S., my name is G.. Have you discussed this with your pediatrican? It does sound odd that she's just not tired out at day's end. You could try bathing her in the evening, putting her in the car and take a drive in the evening. Sometimes the car motion will put a baby to sleep.
And kudos to you for breastfeeding! Mine would fall asleep at the breast almost all the time.

I would stop all naps completely. Stop what you're doing and play "hard" with her...i'm sure she's crawling so don't put her in a playpen...make her crawl.

But I would at least call your ped and let him/her aware of the situation. They may say it's normal, but I understand your frustration of tiredness. I hope this helps.

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C.A.

answers from San Francisco on

Hello S.,
I'm so sorry to hear about no sleep. I know the feeling. We use to start our daughters night time routine (bath, bottle, book, bed) at 8 and she started waking up 1-4 times at night (she did a month of 10 hour nights, which was just a tease as well). We recently moved her night time routine to 7 (which I don't like because I only get 3 hours with her a day, besides the hour in the morning of getting her ready) but she has begun to start sleeping better. I read on BabyCenter.com and BabyZone.com that sometimes when babies get over tired they do not sleep. I'm so far finding that to be true. I still haven't had a 10 hour night since October, but I'm hopeful.
I hope that helps!
Best of luck!
C.

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J.M.

answers from Salinas on

Hi S..
I have 8 month old twin girls and one sounds exactly like your daughter! I went through the same thing and finally used the Ferber Method and as reluctant as I was to go that route, it actually is working. My husband has to be the one in charge, since my instinct says to pick her up when she cries. After less than a week, there is a major difference in her sleeping. She is only getting up a few times and cries for a few minutes and soothes herself back to sleep. Get the book about it. The Dr. that came up with this method really knows what he is talking about.
Good luck!
J.

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K.A.

answers from Sacramento on

We had sleep issues with my son around that age (very frequent night waking and 30-45 minute naps). I had no idea what to do; I just knew I wasn't going to let him "cry it out." I read the "No-Cry Sleep Solution." It has a lot of different ideas on how to lovingly encourage your child to get more rest. I think key for us was getting him on a more regular schedule (which meant waking up at the same time every day, going down for naps at a regular time, and going to sleep much earlier at night), getting his naps to be longer (the book tells you how to do this), creating a regular bedtime ritual, and then encouraging him to fall asleep in a different way (their sleep associations, such as nursing to sleep, are really strong). We saw a drastic improvement in his naps and night-time sleep within a couple weeks of getting a plan together and sticking to it. My son is now 27 months and takes a 3-hour nap every day and sleeps 10 hours every night. He will still wake up once or twice occasionally, particularly if he's sick, teething or going through a growth spurt—and it's important to have realistic expectations of what "sleeping through the night" means at each age. But do I think babies and children need a lot of sleep (not to mention mommies!), and you are right to be concerned and try to address this now. It's so hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel when you are frustrated and sleep-deprived, but you will get through this. Good luck!

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S.H.

answers from San Francisco on

Your baby may be over tierd and there for will not sleep. There is a WONDERFUL book that saved my life when my daughter was a baby. It's called 'healthy sleep habits, happy child.' My daughter because a different child with the sleeping tips of this book. She is almost 5 and still has great sleep habits. She's in bed at 7:00 pm and up a 6:00 am.

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E.L.

answers from Sacramento on

Hi S.. I have a 17 month old who didn't sleep at all until 9 months. She would only sleep 5-15 min. at a time with on occasional 45 min stretch at night. I finally took her to the chiropractor and they got her sleeping through the night. I was at my wits end before this getting absolutely no sleep. I know it sounds crazy, but after seeing several specialists and trying a million things, the chiropractor worked the best. I still had to try the cry it out method to teach her to fall asleep herself, but she would then stay asleep. If I ever skipped a chiropractic appointment, she would stop sleeping.
Hope this helps, it is soooooo hard to not get any sleep!

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M.M.

answers from San Francisco on

If you really really want to sleep then buy the book "Solve your child's sleep problems" by Richard Ferber, MD. It lets your child cry it out with alot of breaks in the middle. The first 3 nights you will be crying with your child like I did. The book says to let your child cry for certain amount of minutes you go and comfort her and then do it another certain amount of minutes. We did this, the only thing is I didn't do the exact minutes, I usually did about 5 minutes first then 10, ect. I cried on the coach with my husband for 2 1/2 hours doing this and he finally stopped crying and went to sleep. The next night he cried for only an hour while we checked on him several times. The third night he only cried for about 20 minutes. Every night it was less and less. After we did this he went to sleep and he also started to take naps. It saved me. I was so exhausted. This is not easy but it works. The books goes into what to do and not what to do. What I like about this you just don't let the child cry forever. You do get to comfort them every few minutes. Good Luck

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R.M.

answers from Sacramento on

My kids did not take naps nor sleep much at night. It was probably about a year before they sleep regularly through the night. I have to say that it is probably genetic, my husband only 5-7 hours a night. I on the other hand need 7-9 hours. They also only slept about 1/2-1 hour max during naps. I would not worry if your child is showing no ill signs. My family gave me a whole lot of books on Ferberizing-do a websearch, I didn't think it worked for me. I just had to accept that I would have a dirty house-no time to clean! My kids are now 8 & 10 years. I thought as they got older they would sleep in like pre-teens, but NOOOOO.... Oh well, they are happy and good kids.

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L.C.

answers from San Francisco on

My daughter was at least 9 months old before I could get consistent and long naps out of her. She really got consistent once we cut down to one nap during the day (maybe 10 months.) Now she naps anywhere from 1.5 to 3.5 hours... usually towards 3 hours. She was a cat napper too and I did not know what to do for her. There were times when I would try to get her back to sleep successfully and I felt like that was good for her. But I think cat napping was what she needed while she was young and my pediatrician said that it was normal.

Night-time sleep has been difficult too and at almost 16 months she sleeps through the night SOME of the time. My husband and I have worked hard to help her be a good sleeper without letting her "cry it out."

My suggestion is to do what you can to help her sleep but not making her too dependent on you to do it. Be patient with her. She will probably come around.

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J.B.

answers from San Francisco on

I'm not sure I have much advice for you... although I definitely feel your pain! My six month old is the same way. She wakes up every 30-90 minutes and usually naps for about 35 minutes at a time. We've tried everything short of the "cry it out method". Have you tried a dream feed? We found some relief in feeding her at 11pm. We'll wait until she's alseep and then pick her up to nurse her. She'll usually sleep while nursing-- but it breaks her normal sleep/wake cycle and sometimes she'll actually fall into a deeper sleep after the feed. We also found that if we go in as soon as she starts making any noise at all and put our hand on her stomach and shhhhh in her ear, sometimes she'll go back to sleep for another 20-40 minutes. We'll do this 4 or 5 times so that she'll sleep for over an hour during nap time. I've found that when she wakes up after a 20 minute nap, if I turn up her lullabies, and rock her in the glider without talking to her, sometimes she'll settle back down after another 20 minutes and fall asleep. I try to make her sleep with any means possible... even if it may go against the books (rocking/nursing her). She used to be a decent sleeper until I went back to work 2 months ago. She slept through the night once since she was born. My husband is also limited help at night and I'm usually a walking Zombie. My daughter is also our first and very happy/easy during the day. At least you know you're not the only one. :)

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M.H.

answers from San Francisco on

I'm sorry to say that my son was the same way. He did not get 6 hours straight sleep until he was 18 months. He gave up on any sort of nap around 18 months and he is now almost 5 years old. He gets by on 8-9 hours of sleep a night with no naps. so if I want 8 hours of sleep, I need to go to sleep when he does and wake up when he does. He just does not need that much sleep. Luckily I don't work outside the home as I have been sleep deprived for 5 years now.

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M.D.

answers from San Francisco on

I feel for you! You have a lot on your plate. I have a 14 month old who still doesn't sleep much, although we have gotten to a better nap schedule, which helps a lot. He has a 10 year old sister and an 8 year old brother. When they are not at school, it is much harder to get him to sleep. My older two did not sleep through the night until they were a year and a half or so, and my older son gave up naps very early. My own experience is that I had to accept the situation and do the best I could to be consistent. Sometimes I needed to stop trying so hard - they could feel my anxiety about trying to get them to sleep so it was harder for them to go to sleep and stay asleep. Can your husband help on the weekend so that you can have a little sleep-in? It will seem like manna from heaven. Your needs are important too and it might mean that your other projects will have to wait for a couple of hours. Good luck - and someday it WILL happen. By the way, cello music works very well as a calmer for us.

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