My Son the Fraidy Cat

Updated on April 11, 2007
S.L. asks from Newark, DE
6 answers

my son was a healthy 8 pound 4 oz baby boy but he developed his first cold a few weeks after he was brought home.He was rushed to the hospital one night at a month old his breathing had become eratic they couldnt find anything wrong. Except his white blood cell count was high and they couldnt explain why. They gave him a shot of antibotic and discharged him at the recheck in the pedatrician office three days later on halloween they found a lump in the groin area. The doctor immediatly sent us to the hospital to be addmited he had limphinitis he had to have surgery he turned two months in the hospital. They drained the fluid which usually would mean they would stay over night for observashion and go home the next day. But no his white blood cell count was still to high and they wouldnt let him go home until it returned to normal. They did blood tests every day until it came down to within normal range. After he came home he was good for a week and got another cold which seemed to be the pattern he would get a cold get rid of it then get another. which could be causeing his behavior now but i'm not sure.

He has always been afraid of water ever since he was born he would start screaming as soon as water touched his head which he has recently outgrown. He was also afraid of the tolit and tub drains he out grew that to thank goodness he now takes showers without being afraid of being sucked in even though I still have to wash him. But recently everything seems to scare him he's afraid of the dark we put a night lite in his room to take care of that. I hear thats bad for the eye's when they get older. He's afraid to be in his room by himself or to even walk in any room by himself he wants someone to come with him. He was afraid of a picture of a mr patato head on a calander even though they have the toy and he has no problems playing with it.

We were at my moms for easter dinner and he had to go potty and he wanted me to take him all the way home for him to potty because he was afraid to go in her bathroom by himself. I have no idea why he has these fears I ask him why he is afraid he says he dosent know why. He's even afraid to pick up girls toy's which I think is just an excuse to not pick up.

Is my son turning into a sissy? he has no idea why he's afraid of such things and I cant explain what would possess him to be afraid of these things. I try to help him as best I can by telling him that nothing can hurt him but I'm at a lose as to what to do? is his experences as an infant affecting him now as he gets older? will he out grow his fears or will he always find things scary?

one night he woke up and got out of bed and came out and was standing by my bedroom door my husband and I got out of bed and put him back in bed and told him everything was alright he seemed to be okay with that and fell back to sleep. the next day I asked him about it if he had had a bad dream or did something wake him up but he couldnt recall wakeing up or even getting out of bed or even being out of his room .

should I really be considering seeking a counsler for him or is his behavior somewhat normal for his age?

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So What Happened?

thanks to all who made me relive my school years by reminding me of my poor grammer. but thats not why I wrote a request to be reminded how poor I was in the grammer department.

I'll be sure to let you all know how my sons copeing with his fears in the next cople of months. keep the advice comming.

More Answers

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C.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

My five year old boy was also afraid of EVERYTHING for about 6 months during his 4th year. I could see him in the bathroom from my office 10 feet away but I had to go in with him each and everytime he went for 6 months to "protect" him from sharks in the empty tub LOL! He was also afraid of the mummy toy he begged for for 6 months. Money well spent!! I also worried about how he was so afraid all the time of everything and finally he just got over it. One day instead of being afraid of everything he wanted to start hanging out in graveyards. Weird obsession don't ask!! LOL So scardy cat is really normal for a little guy with a big imiagination.
don't sweat it and remember that the next obsession could be ANYTHING so don't worry about that one either. (Our new obsession around here is dressing like the dukes of hazzard.)

1 mom found this helpful
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H.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Five year olds have big imaginations and they can get carried away sometimes. Your pediatrician should be open for discussion on any concerns you may have. This is probably something that is best discussed with him/her. They will know his history and can give you recommendations for how to handle incidences at home and can offer a referral if they feel it's necessary.

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S.L.

answers from Reading on

HI S. he is only five years old. it is natural for yooung children to have fears. he is definitely not a sissy or scaredy cat he just has fears. my daughter whi is now 12 had fears of the dark, the bathroom, strangers, pets, dark etc. she has now outgrown this all. it took until she was about 10 to outgrow some of her fears. just reassure him. he will be fine. i have 4 children and she was the only one that had these excessive (at times) fears. justt continue what you are doing.

1 mom found this helpful
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J.T.

answers from Erie on

Dear S.:

Let me start by defending you to those "mothers" (and I use the term loosely) who have bashed your grammar or sentence structure. You are concerned about your son and therefore the first thing on your mind is not whether or not you will pass the critic of others reading. There I feel better.

Now as far as your son's fears go, to you they may seem irrational but to him they are very real. As some of the other Mom's said, your Pediatrician would be the one most likely to be able to help you to deal with his fears.
Believe it or not this IS normal and he will outgrow it. Most little ones develop, what we as adults feel are irrational, fears. They can be anything as simple as the dark to the complexities of your sons.
Know that the positive things you are doing for him will allow him to eventually overcome his fears. There are some wonderful alternative methods out there to help him. (Please see my A little about me:)
Things like EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) could be very helpful if you can find someone in your area trained in it.
If you are anywhere near Erie, PA. I am certified and would help you at no cost to you.
But, first and foremost talk to your Pediatrician before trying any alternative therapies. Most Physicians today are very accepting of newer techniques, but there are some who are still stuck in the old school ways and nothing holistic or alternative is worthwhile in their minds.
I do wish you the best of luck and want you to know that your son will not go to High School with these fears, in fact he will probably out grow them on his own by 4th or 5th grade.

Let me know if I can be of any other assistance.

J. T.

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R.G.

answers from York on

S.,
Your son is at the ripe age for developing fears. Some babies are not comfortable with water from any age, but most healthy normal children develop some fears beginning around 4-5. Check with your pediatrician. I recently took my daughter in for a check up (She'll be 5 soon) and they gave us a scheduled handout that covered this topic as it's extremely common in children his/her age.

Rest assured it's totally normal behavior. Just keep up doing what you're doing to acknowledge his fears (don't agree with them) but make him feel supported and loved. That's most of what he needs right now.

Blessings,
Rolinda
Wife, Mother, Friend

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J.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

My daughter is five and she gets scared of everything as well. It's the age. They'll outgrow it.
If it would make you feel better talk to your peditrician about it and see what he/she says.

And to comment on below-Are we in high school?

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