Need Advice on Getting Newborn to Sleep in Bassinet

My little boy would wake up every time I tried to lay him down as well. I discovered that using a heating pad in his bassinett before he went to sleep really worked! As I was doing his last feeding of the night (before bed) I would heat up a microwave heating pad (you can get one for $10 at Bed Bath and Beyond) and put it in the bassinett under a blanket while he ate. When he was done, the bed was nice and warm and he would transition easily to the warm bed (take the heating pad out when you put him in!). Also, we got a sleep positioner that had soft, adjustable sides and that would allow him to sleep on his side if he wanted, and then I didn't have to worry about his rolling onto his stomach. I would put the heading pad on top of the positioner to warm it up and then put the blanket over that. I hope it helps! It saved me!

I haven't looked at any of the other responses that you've already received, but have you tried one of the bears with a heartbeat? I know that with my first son, I had to use a hot water bottle. I got the water just hot enough to warm the bottle, and by the time it cooled off, he was asleep. As far as sleeping on her back, she should be able to roll herself to her side at least a little bit within the next week or so. I'm dealing with some of the same things with my newborn. Good luck.

Well this might sound a little weird but 2 of my children were the same way and I actually put them in there infant car seat and they slept pretty well that way. My newest is one of the two children and she now sleeps in her bassinet with out any problems most of the time anyway. Well good luck.

We had the same problem when our son was newborn. We did not feel safe having him on the mattress; when you are exhausted,like new parents are, rolling over accidently is only human. Our compromise was to let him sleep (on his stomache) on our chests (we took turns). This lasted for the first few weeks. The next step: we placed his car seat in the bassinet, and he would sleep there most of the night. Then he transitioned to the bassinet without the car seat. We were able to put in his own room in a crib at 2 months. I strongly believe that everybody sleeps better, and safer, if baby and parents have separate beds. Since he went to his crib at two months, until now, almost three years, he sleeps through the night with few exceptions.

I understand (and remember) how tired you are, even though my son's newborn days are years passed. 6 days out of the womb is a lot of sudden change for a newborn to deal with... She spent 9 months continuously curled up tightly and pressed against you, always cradled by your warmth, your heart beat, and your all encompassing touch. Now she's in a big scary COLD world and feels most safe when still being cradled by you...who can blame her. Personally I would give her some more time to adjust being outside of you. I suggest keeping her in your bed for just awhile longer, where she feels safe and connected to you. I understand that it can be difficult for you to sleep as deeply as you would like, but I think it would benefit you both in the long run. As a society we sometimes are so caught up in the physical needs of the baby (i.e - having her sleep on her back) that we forget about their emotional needs like having her feel safe and comforted. This is the stage in which bonding takes place; where she will develop her sense of security and trust. Building a strong and secure foundation for her will be instrumental for her in later years.

What worked to help my son sleep soundly:
We had our son in bed with us for about 2 weeks and then we moved into this...
1. We wrapped him SO tightly he couldn't break free of the blanket...arms and legs. This would give him the "in womb" feeling. We used this method up to about 6 months of age, although as he progressed in size he would be able to break his arms free after awhile. He would cry (sometimes) as we were wrapping him (and I mean TIGHT), but within a few minutes he would be sleeping so soundly that it was definitely worth those initial tears.

2. When he was in a bassinet (which was not connected to the bed) we would position a space heater to face the bassinet. Another "in womb" feeling...keeping him nice and warm.
As he got older though and moved into the crib in his own room we would just keep his room really warm.

With the regimen he was sleeping through the night completely by 2 months old, give or take a night here or there.

I hope this helps. Good luck and congratulations on the new baby girl!

Blessings.

32 years ago, when my firstborn wasn't falling asleep, my mom was on hand to help me out. She'd take him in the other room with her and soon he'd be fast asleep. I asked her what it was she was doing that I wasn't doing and she chuckled as she explained that babies are used to being in tight places. She showed me how to wrap him snuggly in a receiving blanket. She'd lay him over her lap and rock him slightly and he'd fall asleep and wouldn't wake when she'd put him in his bed. It's worked for all three of my kids and also two grandsons. I hope it helps.

Blessings,
K.

OK - maybe I'm a heretic, but I have rarely met an infant who likes to sleep on their back - I myself can't stand sleeping on my back - why would I force my baby to do that??? I've seen a few parents that eventually got their kids to sleep on their back, but I'm convinced it isn't natural. (it is a very 'unsecure' way to for them to sleep) I have 4 kids (oldest 17, youngest 4) who all slept on their side - they liked it, I liked it. I think fear carries us way too far sometimes. And not all babies are the same. I did keep the house warm enough in the winter so that the baby didn't need more than one blanket, and I dressed the baby appropriately for the summer nights so he/she could be comfortable. Unless your baby has physical issues, I do not get forcing kids to sleep on their back. Putting our kids in the car is a FAR greater risk than putting them on their side.

I would encourage you to consider allowing your baby to sleep with you. I slept with both of my sons and they're fine. Some researches show that it is safer to have your baby sleep with you.

Imagine how your baby feels, after being so safe and connected in your womb, and now all alone. She just wants to stay attached to you and that's very, very healthy! I hope you will consider allowing her to sleep with you until she is ready.

Put her on her side with a wedge on her front and back. Your baby is used to hearing your body next to her. Your heart beat, the smell (put your t-shirt that you had on that day in the bassinet so she can smell it. Your baby wants to be wrapped up so she can feel secure. Good Luck.
J.

Have you checked out Harvey Karp's " The Happiest Baby on the Block "? Once I discovered swaddling & some of his other techniques...I could get my little one to sleep solid and sound and finally sleep myself. You could also get one of those mini bed companion sleepers for newborns, designed so your baby will be in bed with you, but you can't roll onto him/her.They have them new at Heller's in San Rafael or check Outgrown( a secondhand shop),also in San Rafael. I recommend the Harvey Karp DVD, so you can watch how he soothes babies, and swaddles them. I used to use little rolled up blankets to put behind and infront of my boy, so he could be partially on his side, but held in place. Good Luck, I know how important sleep is right after you've had a baby.L.

M.,
You and my sister share the same name!

I feel your pain, frustration, and exhaustion. My five month old was the same way. First, I have to tell you that this is common, and that every baby is soothed by slightly different things, so if some of the suggestions you get don't work, keep trying. It takes time for babies to get comfortable in the world, and your warmth and smell soothes her.

1. Swaddle! What worked for me was swaddling. I tried this several times before I got it right, because she was a very wiggly baby and using light receiving blankets didn't work very well... she would squirm out of them and wake up. I finally achieved success using the Kiddopatamus Swaddle Me blanket, which comes in fleece and cotton in multiple sizes, and velcros closed, so they can't get out, until they are much older.

2. The Happiest Baby on the Block. It's a book and/or DVD with a "method" for soothing babies, you may have heard of the 5 S's. It works for most babies... some babies need all 5 S's, some need only a few. However, it won't necessarily solve your sleep problems for your baby sleeping on her back.

3. An incline. My baby had a lot of trouble with reflux, and then choking on it, and so she was VERY uncomfortable on her back. The small incline from the baby sleep positioners isn't enough. I actually packed sheets underneath the mattress in a snuggle nest which is one of those little beds you can put in your bed for them, then swaddled her, and slept with my arm around her. That was the combination that worked, at great cost to my husband who didn't have enough room in our queen size bed. So, as soon as possible, we got her back in the bassinett - about 3 weeks. It also made me nervous safety wise because she did slide down out of the actual bed and into ours, near our covers, so it still wasn't ideal.

My pediatrician recommended the Tucker Sling, so you can put them at a 30 degree angle. You can look it up at www.tuckersling.com. The other thing that I've heard of is the Amby Motion Sleep Swing (look it up through Dr. Sears website). Both of these cost $$, so if you don't have a problem with reflux, try other things first. You can test to see if this is a problem by having her sleep in her car seat. Of course the problem is that you need to strap her in, because the straps are a choking risk, and that might wake her up. My sister and I put blankets over the straps, and that worked for us, but you need to use your own judgement about your baby as to whether or not you are comfortable with that.

4. Soothers - white noise, some even come with womb sounds, work for some. It didn't seem to make much difference for me, but now my daughter is soothed by soft, instrumental music.

5. Remember to Swaddle! Quite snugly. That is the single biggest thing that made the most difference, and it was somewhat magical. So, for your sleep starved mind, let me say again... Swaddle.

And good luck. I wish you sleep soon.

Congratulations on your baby! I know what you mean - when my older daughter was born, I felt like I couldn't sleep if she was in my bed because I was afraid of rolling over on her! We used to have a bassinet that would vibrate. See if you can find one for cheap somewhere. We used ours for both kids and that thing saved me. I don't think there is a newborn alive that can resist falling asleep in a vibrating bassinet.

That being said, does she sleep during the day by herself? If so, it is just a matter of duplicating whatever you are doing during the day, at night. If she is sleeping in the nursery by herself during the day, you may consider moving her bassinet in there for night time too. (Trust me, if she cries, you'll hear her just as if she were a foot from you!)

Whatever you do, I do think it's useful for her to learn to fall asleep by herself. Someone recommended the "On Becoming Baby Wise" book to me and I found it soooooo helpful! Good luck to you and enjoy your snuggly little newborn!

Hi M.
I think being with you is the safest place for your baby.. like other moms have already expressed, she just came out of your womb, she is only in search of that comfort & I think its totally natural for babies to co-sleep with the parents. I was nervous at first too when I had my son, so we bought one of those Baby Delight Snuggle Nests [got it for $15 on ebay] and it helped me feel like I wouldnt smush him although he was right there beside me. It only took a few wks before we got rid of that & he was just fine in bed without it. Another thought a midwife told me about fear of rolling over on baby is "you wouldn't just roll off your bed would you?" I truly belive babies benefit from this attachment style parenting, and would recommend sharing that transitional time for the first few months at least. Babies wake up so much in the night, I also found it way more comfortable & easier to just roll over & nurse.. You will soon find your own comfortable space that baby can share. Enjoy the blessings!

My daughter went through a period of waking every time I put her down too. Here are some of the things I tried:
First of all i always swaddle her and she has a sleep positioner. Sometimes I would put a heating pad in her bed before I was ready to put her in it...I moved it when she was put down, but then her bed was nice and warm. Also the Mama Bear helps her a lot.
We basically just suffered through sitting up with her and trying her bed every so often, then worked on putting her in her bed during the day when we weren't as tired until she started sleeping in it... I'm happy to say at three and a half months my daughter sleeps through the night in her co-sleeper next to my bed! Good Luck!

You know, my daughter was, and still is, the same way. She's now 5/12 months old and I can't get her to sleep in her crib for more than an hour or so max. When she was that little I was also scared to sleep that way so unfortunately I ended up sleeping in my comfy rocker in the living room, reclined, with her on my chest. By the time she was about 2 months I started just taking her to bed with me and she sleeps between my husband and I, still usually on her side, but doesn't feel she needs to cuddle up so close the same. Honestly, the only thing I would worry about is how close she is sleeping to you, and making sure your bedding isn't too soft or high, etc. I did read somewhere that babies really prefer to sleep where they take their naps so when she's really tired during the day try to put her down where you want her to sleep at night. Good luck

Hi M.-
You already have a lot of good advice, I see, but I thought I'd give you my input as a Mom who still co-sleeps (the same way as you- baby on his side & snuggled up) with our 3.5 month old son. He too, wouldn't sleep alone & ended up in our bed. He wouldn't nap unless he was laying on one of us either. I read "The Secrets of the Baby Whisperer" & got him napping in his crib in 3 days. It's the pat & shush method. But try to get her familiar with the bassinet first- like put her down in it when it's not time to sleep & build up her confidence & comfort, then procede. You want to put them down- not fully asleep & pat their backs & shush them to sleep. We got Cash a sleep positioner so we can place him on his side w/out fear of him rolling onto his tummy. Six days is a lot younger than Cash was when we put him in his crib, but I know it's possible. I recommend the book highly.
HTH & Good Luck!

My girlfriend just had a baby in Dec. and they were putting him in what I call a Moses basket. You can carry it around with you from room to room if need be. He seemed to sleep well in it because it was padded all around and seemed to be comforting and cozy. Good luck.

I just had my third baby in three years about 5 months ago. I understand where you are coming from. What I had to do in order to get any sleep where she wasn't co-sleeping was to swaddle her nice and tight and give her a pacifier (only one of my babies has taken one). I have also fallen in love with cradle swings where they swing side to side instead of front to back. Right now, my five month old still spends a good two or so hours in the morning in her swing and she loves it. So, swaddling and swings are my advice from experience. Good luck and congratulations on your baby!

I do kind of a mix. In the early mornings I allow my son (2 weeks old)to sleep in my bed with me. I have a body pillow in between my hubby and I so he hit the barrior and stays on his side. But in the evenings I wrap him, lay him on his side and wrap a blanket in an upside down U and make a head space kind of like the head support in his carseat and then I cover him with another blanket. That way he is secure and warm. and At times when he has a tummy ache I take out all the blankets and allow him to sleep on his tummy but his bassanet is on an incline and him being my 9th I am also a light sleeper. I know I will prob get emails saying I should not put him on his tummy but I slept on my timme, so did all the brothers and sisters and mom and my other kids and we are all fine. Anyhow if you create a 'O' using the blankets, wrap her up and stick her inside the 'O' then she will probibally sleep.

Hi M.,
get one of those sleep positioner...for your baby to sleep between.
as well as .... I use to nurse my baby to sleep (in a rocking chair) and then once she is asleep I very carefully...took
her to her bassinet...and placed her in it between the sleep positioner.
sometimes she would wakeup...and sometimes she would be fine..
but then you just nurse her a bit more...its better then in the bed...I had her in the bed at 6 months when she was sick and neither of us had a good sleep...its better when they are in their own bed...(my opinion)...

(http://www.target.com/b/ref=sc_fe_l_1_13035421_15/601-###...
I use the Cool Flow Back Sleeper $12.99
(there are others to choose from...as well)
Also, I recommend putting your baby in a halo blanket
...put in a long sleeve pj with feet and then in the halo
blanket...(so you don't have to worry about her being cold)
and then use no other blankets.

p.s. ITS NOT A MYTH that bed sharing can sometimes be dangerous for the baby...its a reality for some...I was
sleeping with my baby for about 3 wks in the bed...when I woke one night with her crying because I had rolled onto her arm...so
it can happen...I think that it is better to be safe then sorry...however I agree that it is nice to sleep with your baby and it is a hassle to get out of bed...however you only have to do this for a little bit of time...and not having to worry while sleeping is better...so I would try and put your baby in the bassinet. It took us 3 days of Sofia crying to get back in her crib.

You might want to check out this article as well...
http://www.sids.org/nfeaturedques.htm

good luck bye K.

My youngest would ONLY sleep on her stomach...much to my fright. Today I'm happy to report that she is a fun, fearless 7yo who is into fitness so unless your baby habit is interferring with your sleep in a way that causes you to not be able to function during the day. I say let her sleep how she prefers.

Most of the SIDS precaution is more about blankets and such getting into a baby's face and since you're constantly aware of her it shouldn't be a problem. My oldest slept bundled against me for the first several months and, I think, it has contributed many positive things to her wellbeing.

Many newborns like tight swadling. See if that helps to comfort her.

have you tried swaddling? our 2 month old boy still sleeps swaddled - it calms him down really quickly and he seems a lot more secure. We use a 'swaddle me' pre shaped swaddling blanket. You can also get special crib inserts to safely hold them on their side (I think)...

Hi M.!

Congratulations on your newborn baby! Those precious little one's sometimes just want to stay close to their mommies! That's why there are SOOOOO many things out there to help you and your baby with this transition.

In case you didn't know, this is why the nurse's in the hospital always "wrap" the newborns. It makes them feel secure after leaving the womb. Are you doing this? If you aren't, then this could be a simple solution for you. However, if you are, then you may need to add a tightly rolled up blanket on each side of your infant after you lay her down in her bassinette. She needs to feel "snug" almost at all times. There are also things you can purchase to lay her in to make her feel "snug", but I would try the blanket thing first. There are sooooo many things to purchase out there, and you will eventually purchase 1/2 of them to make you and your baby more comfortable in life, so try the "home rememdies" first :o)

As many professionals will tell you....it is really not safe to sleep with your newborn. Even if you're a "light sleeper", accidents can very easily happen. Plus, you will not get enough rest, simply because you're afraid of rolling over on her during the night. You need your rest whenever you can get it at this stage, as you're still in "recovery" both physically and emotionally.

Be patient, it's still the first month of adjusting for everyone involved. Babies don't "pop out with their routine's" ;o) we have to implement their routine's and securities. You'll do great, don't worry. Simply make her feel safe and she'll start sleeping normal (which is ALOT yet waking every couple hours).

Good Luck! If you need anything else, we'll all be here for you!

:o) N.

Hi there,
I had a similar experience with my son when he was a newborn...We had big plans of hi sleeping in the "Co-sleeper" next to our bed...did not happen. He basically slept in our bed next to me,(with a big long "BOB" pillow between him and the edge of the bed), for the first 4 1/2 months. Then I started putting him in the co-sleeper for his naps, after I nursed him to sleep. At the 4 1/2 month mark, I would nurse him to sleep and then put him in the co-sleeper...lo and behold it worked! From that point on, he slept in the co-sleep and at that point started sleeping through the night as well!!!!! Until then, he nursed every 3-4 hours throught the night, with easy access to me:)
Good luck,
-Wendy(mom to Zachary, who is 9 months old now)

You have many of the same responses that I would give about the warm blanket etc. But one thing I noticed when my son was a newborn is that he hated his bassinet but would sleep in his crib. He would even stay in his car seat but he did not like the bassinet and we ended up taking it back because if we put him in it, even for a moment he cried and wailed etc. but if we put him in the burrito wrap in the crib, he was o.k for at least a few hours. I did let him sleep with us at night for the first month, but we would put him in the crib in the day time. Good luck and enjoy these moments, they go by so fast.

M. - Have you tried getting a sleeper positioner to put in the bassinet? This allows the baby to sleep on its side and you do not have to worry about the child rolling onto their tummy. With my first one we use to roll up some blankets real tight and wedge them against him so that he would not roll over, this worked really well in the bassinet. Good Luck!

I have 4 children from 18 yrs to my newest 7 months. Sleeping rules have chaged from my first (sleeping baby on stomach). If you really want her to sleep in her own bed, use a sleep postioner, worked great for my baby and you have to be consistant, it will only take a couple of days and she WILL go to sleep when she is tired. I am suprised a 6 day old infant can insist on anything at this point, besides food. Personally, I let mine sleep with us for a 4-6 weeks, it made ME most comfortable, newborns usually sleep anywhere if they are full and burped. Are you swadeling your baby in a blanket?Good luck.

my boys are 9 & 11 now, so this might be old school to you now, I'm not sure of the new inventions they come out with...but, we rolled up either a towel or receiving blanket on both sides of our kids in the bassinet so they didn't move in the position they were in. 6 days old don't move to much. good luck.

My daughter who is now 4.5 months had the same issue. I would walk with her and nurse her and she would drift off only to wake up as soon as I put her in her bassinet. Finally I had her sleep with me and she slept so much better. At first I thought I was being a bad mom, but back in the day (WAY back) children always slept with their mothers. It is natural. Women did it for hundreds of years. I never put my daughter between my hubby and I because he moves and rolls in his sleep, but I have always been very still. I kept my arm over her and a recieving blanket under her. I nursed her while we were in bed and that helped me not be as tired as we both slept through feedings!
As for sleeping on her side, my daughter did that too. The doctor told me it isn't quite as big a deal until they are one month old when the SIDS starts being a risk. My daughter did eventually start sleeping on her own in her bassinet. She would start out in our bed and in the middle of the night when she would wake up I would nurse her back to sleep and then put her in the bassinet and she stayed asleep. That was at about two or three weeks.

My son who is 5 months never slept in a bassinet but has slept in his crib since we brought him home. We were consistent. She probably needs to be held even more. I would suggest to continue to keep trying and continue to keep trying. She's still a newborn so if anything, you can try to have her sleep in your arms. Its definetely an adjustment and sleep deprivation is what you are probably experienceing right now. I wish you luck!

My son was the same way. We started having him sleep in a travel fold-up co-sleeper between me and my husband. It was basically a padded box. But I put it between us and whenever he cried, I cuddled close to the box and placed my hand on his chest. He would fall asleep holding my hand. So sweet. Now, he's almost 5 months old and sleeps through the night in his own crib in his own room. I found the product on Amazon's website. It's called The First Years Close & Secure Sleeper. Here's the link...
http://www.amazon.com/First-Years-Close-Secure-Sleeper/dp...
Hope this helps!
J.

Our kids were the same way. There are these little pads that have rises on either side--- like a hotdog bun and they prop the baby up so that it doesn't roll over onto it's face and suffocate. We put that in the middle of our bed and the babies slept really well. After about 4 weeks of sleeping in our bed, I transferred the hot dog bun thing into the bassinet, next to our bed, and the babies slept there very well. Also, I would put my hand on the baby, while it was in the bassinet, and gently rock the baby--reassuring him/her that I was right there, next to them. They just want to be with you when they are infants, don't worry---it's totally normal. Regardless, I would go buy one of those hot dog bun pads for your baby. They are FANTASTIC. You can find it at most baby stores.

When my daughter was only a few days old I had the same problem and then my brother in law swaddled her (good and tight) and put her snug in a sleep positioner and she slept great.
Good luck!

Hi, M.,
After being in a nice warm, soothing place like the womb for almost ONE year, I would be rather scared of this cold, loud world around me, too! Give her some time and she will sleep on her own. Try wrapping her in something that you have worn....crazy..but they know your scent.A night gown or shirt. Roll up a blanket so she doesn't roll over on her stomach...side sleeping is safe if they don't roll over on their bellies....but this is the only culture where belly sleeping is "dangerous", for me..being Hispanic....this is how our babies sleep best...but rolling up blankets or towels and placeing them on the inside
of her body so she doesn't roll on her belly, will keep you from worrying,and allow her to keep her new favorite position. I enjoyed sleeping with my babies....those were moments that my husband and I cherished, for us, though,my husband would sometimes sleep in the guest room, to be more comfortable, because, your right you don't sleep deeply, small, temporary sacrifice, for a good night's sleep, everyone was happy. Are you nursing? It's good for her and for you...reduces the chances of all kinds of cancer and helps you loose that pos-partum weight. They grow so fast, enjoy her...nap when she naps...and you will get through this....your doing a great job! Good Luck

M.

the heartbeat sound can be very soothing to a little one ... as can swaddling ... my son always slept better with me too.. it took a little while for him ( and me ) to learn to go on our own
warming the blankets a bit in the dryer helped too.
L. f

Congratulations to you!
I had the same problem with my little guy. I found that the bassinet was too hard and too cold for him. I put an additional blanket around the mattress and tucked it under. Once I did that and "burritoed" him in the sleep positioner he was nice and snug.

Good Luck to you. I am now trying to get him in the crib with the same issues. Good Thing it is getting a little warmer out.

I had the same thing happen to me with our 3rd daughter. I had her next to me for the 1st 3 months. Then I had to go back to work and started putting her in her crib. I had to let her cry herself to asleep for a few nights. Now she is sleeping through the night with no problems.

Hi M.,
I have a 3mo old, and he sleeps in a bassinet. We haven't gotten him to fall asleep on his own yet, but he sleeps pretty well in the bassinet at night. My suggestion, is if she only falls asleep on her side, then prop her on her side with some receiving blankets rolled tightly on each side of her. This will keep her in place on her side, and then if she falls asleep; slowly try moving her to her back. It may take quite a few tries, but it may come with time. also, you can put the blankets in the dryer to warm them; then roll them up and she may start to get used to that instead of your warmth.
Or, if you can get her to fall asleep with you, then slowly start moving her on her back while in the bed with you; then start moving her further away from you.... just take some baby steps with her. Sometimes it will come with time. Next week she may want something totally different!
Good luck and congratulations on your little girl!

Dear M.,

I think when you change her diaper, try to wrap her tight in her blanket, because before born she used to live inside you for 9 months with her feet and hands close together. I think this solution will have you.

Best regards
A.

My son for the first few weeks would only sleep on me, we slept in the livingroom on the recliner. He didn't sleep much in the bassinet either. When I did get him to sleep in it I had to put the heating pad on to warm the bed up. Make sure your new born is warm enough, if they are not warm enough and stay warm they wake up, that's why your newborn prefers to sleep next to you. The warm blanket sleeps are great. My son only slept and still only sleeps on his tummy. If I put him on his back he would instantly wake up. He ended sleeping in bed with us until he was 4 or 5 months old, which was the only way I could get any sleep. But do what works for you.

your baby might be cold. make sure she's wearing a hat when she goes to sleep and swaddle her in a warm blanket.

I have a new baby too and she is the same way. I have tried to get her to sleep in the bassinett and it is just not going to happen. My baby is now 3 months old and I have a 18 month old. So my advice to you is to let her sleep there...she was up against you for so many months and is not ready to not have you with her. My opinion is that she needs you and to do what is best for the both of you. I have had my daughter sleep in her crib for naps during the day and continue to work on getting her in there for the nights. But for me I have to do what is easiest for me...since I work full time and have another toddler. Best of luck. Just remember that she will only be this little once. :)

I would try to use the swaddle method. Get one of those miracle blankets, they are great and it keeps them nice and cozy. My son is almost a year old, and had the same problem, I would swaddle him, but he would always get out of the blanket. The miracle blanket works because they can't get out of it. Also, try to lay her on her side. Good luck!

Okay...I know you're going to think I'm crazy but this is what helped with my little one. You know those natural herb neck wraps that you warm up in the microwave? Well I would MINIMALLY warm that up, put it in a pillow case and place it against him (while he was on his side). He loved it! He was colic too so the warmth helped his tummy. Maybe this would work for you. Good luck!

Hello there. I don't really know how this email was sent to me, because I don't have any kids, but I do plan on being a teacher and have babysat a million times. I hear that if you buy an exercise ball and bounce on it, the consistent up and down rhythm seems to calm babies. Babies are used to movement because when they are in the womb they sleep when you active, but when you are sleeping they are active, they come out on a different sleep schedule than what we are used to. Or at least that is what i have read, so it is all a matter of retraining that sleep schedule, but also by nurturing her and providing comfort for your baby.

It is okay if the baby sleeps with you. Studies that show co-sleeping to be dangerous do not weed out incidents of parents who have been drinking, or with co-sleeping on the couch. When you take that out it is very safe. Dr. Sears wrote a great book called nighttime parrenting and he shares his and many other parents nighttime experiences. Also try www.askdrsears.com. I am constantly surprised by how many parents really do sleep with their kids.

When my 7 month old was a newborn she was the same way. I swear we did everything, until it occurred to me that she might have gas. After 3 weeks, we gave her some Mylacon and she slept like a baby and smiled for the first time. We also let her sleep on her stomach during the day when I was awake, because she would only sleep for a few minutes on her back. At night she slept on her back in a co-sleeper.

Neither of my boys liked the cradle we tried to use so we just put them in the crib and they were happy. You could try a co-sleeper too that way you could keep your hand on her and maybe that would help.

M.,

I had the same problem with our first son, Branden. For our son the body warmth was part of it. I took a heating pad on low, covered it up with his blanket in the bassinet, when I put him in I took out the heating pad and turned it off. I found that the cool sheets didn't feel nice to him after he had been all snuggled up with us and he would wake and cry. He wouldn't go back to sleep and I would take him back into bed with us. Who could blame him, I don't like the cold sheets after I have been all snuggled up. Another thing to maybe consider is one of the wedges they sell for babies to help her feel like she has someone next to her. That may also help with getting her to sleep in the positions you are most comfortable with. We didn't have to do the heating pad thing for long, but when he was first born the warm sheet in the bassinet and a wedge were a huge help! Good luck to you. Wishing you restful sleep. It gets better as they get older, plus warmer weather is right around the corner.

Best wishes,
G.

your baby is so young, she may need to sleep with you for a short period, keep trying the bassinet but you may wan to try something called the nursing nest which we laid in our bed and our son slept in for the first 4 weeks. it kept him safe in bed so I could sleep knowing he was okay but he was also close. there are other products that can keep your little one safe in your bed until you can transition to the bassinet. Also I know it is not recommended by dr.s but my son preferred sleeping on his stomach , just make sure his face is to the side, so I think sleeping on her side is fine
good luck, her sleeping will get better and so will yours

As if you need a 78th response, but I just wanted to pitch in. I have an 11 week old and about 3 weeks ago he started being difficult with day naps. Sleeps with us at night, and does great. only wakes twice usually to nurse. Anyhow, it was great to see all the responses for myself as well...since the 11th, when you posted...I went to BabiesRus and bought a positioner to try him on his side....and it worked! He's napping much better now. I still like him to sleep with us at night, because we love it, and we all get a good nights sleep. Also, I'm more on the side of attachment parenting...and not on the Cry it Out side. I have read a lot (too many) of books...most of the ones mentioned by other moms..."On Becoming Baby Wise" (not my style), "The Secrets of the Baby Whisperer" (she has a lot of good tips), "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Baby" (also some good points), "The Happiest Baby on the Block" (great book, helps teach you how to swaddle, shush and shake to sleep), and lastly "No Cry Sleep Solution" by Elizabeth Pantley. This is the route I'm taking, so I really like this book. If you chose the Cry it Out method, go with one of the first two. If you don't want to, choose the last one, or Dr. Sears. Doesn't matter what you pick, its what works for you. Good luck, let me know if the positioner thing works for you. Swaddling works good too, but only at night for me.

Congratulations on your new arival! My son wouldn't sleep in anything other than our arms or on our chest. We did get him to sleep in his car seat carrier. They like to be all swaddled up because that is what they are used to in the womb. We put him in his car seat carries just as if we were going somewhere in the car. He slept on the bed with us in his car seat. Then he gradually went to the bassinet, then the crib. It was all in steps. He had to be swaddled because otherwise he felt insecure in a large open space. We spent many a night in the rocking chair too. Hope this helps. I've had 3 and they were all different. Good luck!

Oh M.,
This is the hard part of Mothering.. If Only I knew then what I do now..My kids are 23 and 20.
Kids are seriously Products of their environment, so you have to show your daughter where it is she needs to be sleeping. ALL New Borns want to be right up against us, but it isn't practical and the long haul will be just that, "A Haul".
You could just start by putting her there at nap time during the day and letting her cry, she is OK, she is just trying to control the situation, thats her job, to manipulate. Sounds strange huh, at such a YOUNG age..Really, it will be ok, but "you" wont if you don't get her into her own space, before you know it, she will be 6 and in your bed.. UGGG
As for the sleeping on her back, have you tried bundling her like she was in the hospital, at this age they still like the "Wrapped" feeling..Also Try her on her side, bundled or not.
I so feel for you, but trust me, as a single mom and an Educator of Wee Ones, you will be thankful!!

Hi - Don't worry too much. Newborns prefer to be held and to sleep next to you and if you have the time, take as much as you can to just hold her. Co-sleeping is wonderful and safe - it helps your baby feel secure and she can feel and hear your breathing patterns, which help her to breathe. Our baby did not like to be put down on his back either (it's a natural instinct for them to feel like they are falling). Our son always slept on his side and still does most of the time, however he is finally getting comfortable on his back for some of the time. (he is now 9 months). Look into articles or books on co-sleeping and also check out the "Co-Sleeper". We use that along with our son in our bed for some of the night. Take care and enjoy.
- L.

I hjave a 10 week old who really needed to be on his side as newborn. We used bolsters to make sure he didn't roll on his stomach and swaddled him snuggly so he felt secure. If you need to hold your newborn to fall asleep and transfer to the bassinet for a couple weeks, which is what I did, don't think it will always be that way. Your newborn is used to being snug in your uterus 24 hrs/d and just needs to ease the transition to being separate. My boy now sleeps through the night and can go down easily most of the time. Our job the first two weeks is to make a newborn feel secure with lots of contact...enjoy, its such a short, sweet newborn period!

The other thing you can try that worked for my daughter, sleep with one of her blankets for a few nights and then put it in her bed next to her. That way she can smell you. When I didn't have a blanket, I would put the shirt I had been wearing in there. That way she feels like you are right there. We also had to swaddle her tightly and use a sleep positioner so that she could sleep on her side. Good luck.

Dear M.,

1) Get the book "The No-Cry Sleep Solution" ASAP!! It is by Elizabeth Pantley. Loaded with info. It has been on my bedside table since my daughter was born. Invaluable.
2) You can e-mail Elizabeth for help, and she also has info on her website www.pantley.com
3) I had a hard time sleeping myself after my baby was born. I realized I could not sleep because I felt I needed to watch over her. This is normal! I held/nursed/rocked my baby until she was asleep (limp limbs) and set her in the bassinet, which was right next to my bed. When she woke up (which is often with most newborns) I did the same thing over and over again. Remember, A FULL NIGHTS SLEEP FOR AN INFANT IS FIVE HOURS. Their sleep is disorganized when they are born and it takes time for them to reach sleep maturity.
The book talks about facts of infant sleep....it is very helpful to know what to expect and what is normal so I can adjust my expectations.

Good luck!

L. M.
Novato

I know it's hard, but she's still young and trainable. You're gonna have to let her cry. I know it sounds cruel, but it's okay for them to get good use out of those lungs. Put a shirt with you and/or your husbands scent on it, while she's in the bassinett. Put it on her pillow and/or over her sheet, that way she can snuggle with it and feel like your there. You could also try to swandle wrap her, like they did when she was first born, maybe that's what she's looking for is that comfort of still being in the womb. It's so hard, because we want to make the right choices, but we all fall under their spells. Good luck and don't give up, because you deserve a good nights rest to properly care for you new gift!

Have you tried swaddling her? We did this after a couple days for our daughter, as she didn't like to sleep on her back either. Usually I would swaddle, rock or sway with her for a few mins until she calmed down, and then lay her in the bassinet. You can also tilt her a little to one side while swaddled and put a rolled up receiving blanket under her to keep her this way. We did this because Naomi would sometimes spit up a whole feeding when she was very small, and I was afraid she would choke if she was flat on her back. Be aware that it may take a little while for her to gt used to being swaddled, but if you stick with it, I think you will all sleep better :) Best luck!
A.

let her sleep on your tummy. She will likely outgrow the need to be so close to you in a few weeks. When she is so new I can understand your fear of her not sleeping on her back, but babies are not as fragile as us parents think they are. If she can only sleep on her side or tummy as long as she has her face turned so she can get air she will be fine let her be comfy.

Try swaddling her with a warm-from-the-dryer blanket.

Ok, the jury is still out about how safe or not co-sleeping is. Many (myself included) believe it's safe if you are not excessively overweight and don't have a sleeping disorder. My midwife assured me I'd wake up and I always did. The baby beats on you with their fist to wake you when you get a little too close ... like if you're ON her/him. That has always been the case with us. Before becoming a parent, I was a deep, heavy sleeper and had trouble waking up. Once I was a parent this changed and now I'm a light sleeper, waking up if I hear my children's breathing change. So since day 4 of my first baby's life, we have co-slept with no problems. In the beginning I made sure my hubby wouldn't roll over onto her by putting a rolled up towel between the baby and him to wake him and remind him. But pretty soon I found that wasn't necessary as his sleeping is lighter too.

If you want more support for co-sleeping, my midwife said there's less chance of SIDS with co-sleeping ... but there's one thing you should know... the mattress may cause SIDS. There's been studies in other countries about that and it has something to do with the mattresses (all mattresses even baby mattresses) having been treated with fire retardant chemicals which mix with our body chemicals and create a toxic sheet above the sheet. Since babies heads are right there on the sheet, they're affected when we're not. Anyways when I looked into that (I forget the websites I went to) they said to make a sheet out of all-cotton cloth diapers to put under the baby. They sell them too. The cotton prevents the mixing of toxic stuff or something. Apparently our country has not looked into this because if true, they'll be liable. I don't know about politics and don't care. I just want to know what's safe for my baby. After looking at the research reports, it seemed to ring true for me. Co-sleeping was the way to go for us.

You can find support for co-sleeping in magazines like Mothering, midwife magazines, and others. Look for it.

I'm not one to tell others what they should do so my advice to you is to look into it more. Don't just assume the hype is true ... that said, because it works well for us, I highly recommend co-sleeping or family-beds and totally appreciated the sleep and comfort knowing I was right there by my babies in case they needed me in the night.

I agree swaddling can be helpful, they have special swaddling "blankets" available for about $10 with Velcro to keep it secure and make it easier for you to do (and not have it come undone at night). I struggled with the same for my daughter, after a month I was about crazy from lack of sleep so I started using her swing- it was great she was buckled in so she had to stay on her back. After she fell asleep she was much easier to transfer to a crib. If you do want to co-sleep it certainly is a safe option if you follow the rules but it can be rather uncomfy for you (no medication at night, no smoking, no drinking, no pillows, no fluffy blankets, etc). If you decide to co-sleep I'd read about it, Dr. Sears has some good information and on the Mothering Magazine website there is a plethora of information about it as well.
Whatever you do take heart, the first couple months are the hardest to adjust too for all of you. :) You guys will figure it out.

M., the danger of sleeping with a newborn is when the baby sleeps on a really soft mattress and/or there are lots of blankets. Your baby obviously needs to be with you to feel secure and doesn't like being alone. Other animal babies sleep with their parents and siblings and human babies prefer to do the same. Have you looked into the small beds that go between the two of you - allowing her to be next to you without laying on the soft mattress or you being in fear you'll roll over on her?

Hi M.,

Your brand new baby just came out of your body and doesn't want to be separated from you. Sleeping beside you is exactly the very BEST place for your baby. You will have a far better chance of getting some sleep with baby in bed than you will running back and forth trying to console her. Your baby isn't in danger, that's a myth. As you say, you are aware of her there beside you - that's how it works. My advice is to secure a side rail, eliminate all un necessary blankets and extra pillows, and enjoy this all too brief and magical time with your child. My daughters slept with us until they decided it was time to leave the bed. They are secure, well adjusted, independent girls and I really think that our family bed arrangement influenced that development.
In any case, you'll figure out what's best for your family but I can only offer heartfelt advice from my own experiences. Best to you! T.

I didn't have a chance to read all the posts (my baby is napping and laundry calls). Try "The Happiest Baby on the block". If I can remember all of them, he recommends 5 S's: swaddling, sucking (on a finger or pacifier), "Shhing" (white noise),being on their Side, and Swinging (motion - they have things you can attach to the bassinet to make them vibrate). Good luck!

try swaddeling her in a warm blanket before she goes to sleep. She is just used to the small space of the uterus. Its ok for her to sleep on her side. My daughter did the same thing and she is just fine. There is nothing wrong with her.

Dani

Hi M.,
It is perfectly natural for her to want to be next to you! She grew inside you and you are all she knows- I understand about the the deep sleep for you but I actually found that much easier for nighttime nursing. I got a snuggle nest for my sons' first few weeks until I was comfortable that I wouldn't squish him. He slept on his side for EVER, thats fine for a newborn. I co-slept with my son until he was 7 months- I finally needed to get him into a crib- but he still comes into our bed between 5 and 7 am (he's 3 1/2)- but that is our best snuggle time. THere is a great sleep book out there called "Healthy Sleep Habits , Happy child": it's a great one- also there are may resources that say co-sleeping is great for the baby and actually allows you to get more sleep because your baby is sleeping better. Or visit www.holisticmoms.org and search articles....Good Luck!

Hi M.! We used a cosleeper that you put inside of the bed. It's called a close and secure sleeper - about $35 to $50. That way she still feels close to you, but it's not as dangerous as being next to you in your bed.

She may be needing your body heat to stay warm enough to sleep right now. My husband thought the amount of clothing I wanted to put on our baby was too much. So I'd put our newborn down with the amount of clothes my husband thought was appropriate and he'd wail and never fall asleep. I brought our baby into the bed two nights in a row and that calmed him enough to sleep. The third night I dressed our baby with an extra layer and he slept very well in the pack'n'play next to our bed. What worked for him was a onsie, a sleep sack, and being wrapped like a burrito in the Miracle Blanket.

If you can't get her to sleep on her back, you can buy foam wedges to lie her in that will make sure she doesn't move/roll over that you can use to keep her on her side.

My son is 11 weeks old now and a good sleeper.

double check with your pediatrician and then get a sleep positioner and sleep her on her side in her bassinet. That was the recommendation of our Ped when our son was born, side or back.

also make sure she's tightly swaddled... and then test her swaddling preferences. Our son sucked his thumb, so he had to be swaddled with his right arm out.

congratulations... you can do it!

I had the same problem with naps and broke the habit by laying my son down in his crib, when he cried I'd pick him up and then lay him back down when he was settled. It took a good week to get him to lay down without crying. HOWEVER, the hard work was totally worth it. I now have a 3 month old who settles himself. I can put him in the crib and walk away. I read the "sleeping" section of the "Secrets of the Baby Whisperer" which was a good launching point in creating my own way.

Hi M.,
We have a little girl who is 10 weeks old and had the same problem. What I've tried is waiting until she's sound asleep which is about 5 to 10 minutes in then laying her down. I've also tried to play with her while she lays on the bed or couch so she gets used to not being in my arms all the time. I know it's getting warmer but swaddling her when she was a few weeks old was helpful too. To be honest, it doesn't hurt to keep your baby close for now because they grow up so fast.

Hi M.,

My first thought is: try to relax. Impossible, I know, but you've only had six days together, and most babies are not born knowing how to sleep on their own. Their whole life has been spent in warm, dark, loud bliss. The real world is cold, bright, and quiet by comparison. Quite a lot to get used to. So, give yourself and her a break, and just focus on getting through each hour and each day. For more practical advice, are you swaddling her snugly? That can help a lot. So can some noise, like the drier or a fan, if it doesn't drive you nuts. Or try shushing her loudly to see if that puts her to sleep. Also, check out what Dr. Sears has to offer. He has a very extensive website, askdrsears.com, where you can look up pretty much anything. His advice is always kind and realistic, in my opinion. They are also very fond of co-sleeping, and offer advice on how to do it safely. I ended up co-sleeping with both my kids, and it was a life saver for us. Every child is different, and has different needs. It's your challenge to learn your child, figure out what they need, and meet that need. Then, everyone is happier! Don't give up on having her sleep on her back. She can learn, and she's only been trying for 6 days. Eternity for you, but it may take her a little longer to learn the habit. A six-day old is rough, and she will change immensely in the next month, and even more by 3 months. It's almost miraculous how much easier they get at 3 months. Hang in there, it does get better, and you'll make it. Good luck!

J.

Hi, My oldest hated the cold sheet/covers. So we warmed them. Also put a blanket next to her with your scent on it. They also enjoy swaddling when they are newborn. God bless!

My two babies slept in my bed with my husband and me. My son was over one when he went into his own bed, without difficulty I might add. My daughter stayed in our bed until 6 months and she didn't have any problems transitioning.

I understand the possible (not probable) dangers associated with this sleeping arrangement; however, I feel that babies, espesially those so young, need the closeness of their mother to feel safe and secure. Sleeping separately is an american idea. Women have been sleeping with their babies close to them for centuries in a lot, if not most cultures. I wouldn't have traded it for the world.

One last thought. Do you breast feed your baby? I never completely slept soundly when my babies were small. I breast fed while in a semi sleep state and though I didn't sleep as deeply as I would have liked, I never fully awoke which actually allowed me to get more sleep, just not very much deep sleep.

My daughter was the same way. 6 1/2 yrs later, it's no different.

Swaddle her in blanket so she feels snug. Also try plopping the car seat in the bassinet. Some like the curled tummy feel.Those two things worked sometimes, but we weren't consistant.