Need Hlep with 3 Year Old Boy Who Cries at Everything

I'm 31 years old and happily married for 11 years. Proud mom of two boys; 10 and 7, one girl 5. I know what you are going through. Try stickers. At this age they seem to love stickers. Each time he behaves well or does what he is asked to do, let him put a sticker on a chart or just paper on the fridge or bedroom door. Come up with an amount he needs for each day and each time he reaches it he gets something he wants. Whether it is a piece of candy, a movie to watch, play a game or something small from the store. Start out with a few stickers so that he is awarded and he will want to be awarded again. Then make it more. Something like that. I hope it works. As we know, it is not going to work all the time. They are still going to want what they want, when they want it. Good Luck.

my son was starting the same thing an after a few times of telling him . if you want to scream then you will sit in your room and not come out until you are done . and stick to your guns close the door to his room and when he is done screaming he will come out and then you can have a quiet talk but everytime he starts screaming even the slightest place him in his room . you will find that he will stop his tatrum pretty fast with a "Go to your room". it is surprising how fast they can understand when they are not getting there way. good luck!

My boy turned 4 two months ago, and also cries over a lot of things. We're finally getting a handle on it by making him go to his room or to the corner everytime he cries over something that is not a good reason to cry over.

Some of the best advice I ever recieved was that everyhting is a phase, it WILL pass. This always helped me when my children were going through one phase that was trying on my patience. He might just need a little extra loving but isn't able to just say it, he may not even realize it.
Hope you can get through it alright : )
When it passes you will look back and say "phew!"

Try 1-2-3 Magic, I know a number of people who have used it successfully. We are now trying it with our 2 1/2 yr old, very strong willed little boy, and there has been progress.

The website is: http://www.parentmagic.com/

oh boy, i feel your pain. my 3 year old was the same way. he would scream and cry uncontrollably for a LONG time, especially when it absolutely could not happen. (like when i flushed the toilet for him... OOPS!... half an hour screaming "I WANT TO FLUSH IT!!!" "make it come back!!!" etc...)

anyway, one thing that helped (not while he was screaming... but when we were having a nice conversation) was to talk to him about how "sometimes mommy makes choices and sometimes you get to make choices". then when he does get mad we just say "sorry, that's not your choice. it's mommy's choice." also talking about how it makes mommy happy when she says no for him to say "ok, mom" and not cry. again, have this conversation when he's in the mood to listen and wants to please you... not when he's on the verge of a tantrum. those were two things that worked surprisingly well... i wouldn't have thought they'd be so helpful!

we also realized we just had to be firm and consistent. i would give into him if we were in public, just to avoid making a huge scene... but he figured out that sometimes he could get away with stuff and that made it harder when we wouldn't let him get his way.

This is a very simple control issue.

Start by giving him two choices. Make certain you voice your preferred choice in both options.

For example:
Do you want to go to time out and then get a hug and get to play with other kids again, or do you want to go to time out and get sent to your bed with no hug?

It makes it their choice.

Otherwise, when that doesn't work (and I have a very stubborn 4 year old with the same problem) I offer him a choice to do it my way or have a spoon of hot sauce.

Let me tell you, after the first time he chose to eat hot sauce he's been seeing things my way. And hot sauce doesn't hurt them, it is very high in vitamin c, and beats washing a mouth out with soap.

Hi M.,

I am also the mom of 2 boys, except they're 32 and 30! I believe that the best way to deal with your son is to ignore his behavior. I would put him in a room and tell him that he can't come out until he's finished crying. It might be inconvenient at times, but I think that he'll eventually get the message that crying doesn't work :-)

First, let me just tell you that 3 so far is the hardest age, I think. Much worse than 2.
I highly recommend the book 1,2,3 Magic by Dr. Thoman Phelan. I found this book to be a great resource and technique! Good Luck.

When my three year old gets mad because she can't have something she wants, she throws a fit also. I pick her up, put her in her bed and turn out the lights and let her scream. The minute I don't hear anything, I go in and tell her that she wanted such and such, but I said no and then I tell her I love her and offer her something else. It usually works. If she is to adamant...well then she just falls asleep!

In your situation I would ignore your son s cring. I would put him in his room until he stops cring. Then I would sit with him and have a talk with him. I would explain to him why he can not have what he is asking for.