Not a Smoke Free House!

So the kids of smokers should not benefit from people being generous? That's the most insane and horribly selfish thing I have ever heard in my entire life.

Can fat people not take the clothes? Or homes that are not kept spotless? I mean who is she to do something like that? I'd have told her to take her clothes and never speak to me again.

She is horribly judgemental.

Rude!

I doubt the kids' (who would be benefiting from the clothes right?) have any say in whether or not their house is a smoke-free house!

If the clothing is used... and they are finished with it.. and the other family needs them... I don't see any reason to fuss about them. The kids aren't smoking are they???? Kids of parents who smoke don't "deserve" to have handme down nice clothing? That is odd to me... I was a child of a smoking father... in fact he still smokes. I'd hate to think that someone was not willing to help me out as a child because of something my father chose to do.

J.

She knocked on their door and asked for the clothing back? *gulp*
Daaaang, your sister has ____@____.com! If she had donated them to charity, she wouldn't know who the heck was on the receiving end. Could be SMOKERS *snicker* ;)

I think your sister is ridiculous. Smokers' children need clothes too! And it's not like they were going to give them back to you. Your sister needs a lesson in acceptance and tolerance!

That's about O. of the most ridiculous things I've ever heard.
I always just want someone to be able to use the stuff I no longer have use for.
I'm sorry, I know it's your sister we're talking about, but she made herself look like a real.......um......you know.

Your sister is a ridiculous elitist. I bet those smokers probably don't approve of her *insert foible here: overeating/choice of deodorant/ political views*.... Plus, plenty of smokers will probably pay for those donated clothes anyways.

Well her husband should have asked her first before giving them away, but what she did after that isnt something I would do, I dont think.

I already have someone I am giving our baby clothes to, if my husband just gave them away to whoever I would be real upset.

Your SIL needs to find something else to complain about. Who cares where her used clothing goes? Unless she was expecting to get it all back someday (which is lending, not giving) then why would she care where they go? Loony...

Well my first thought was, I'd want clothes FROM a non smoking house if I got used clothes, not to care if they went TO a smoking house. I dont' blame her one bit, after I thought about it for a minute, I'd bet she would like to bless someone with those clothes, that doesn't spend their money on cigarettes. That is OK. However, I would die before I'd go back and get them back, but more power to her!!!

It is her right to do what she wants with the clothes. There is probably additional reasons along with the smoking that she didn't want the clothes to go to this family. However once the husband gave away the clothes she should have just let it go. It was wrong to go get them back.

If they are giving the clothes away, not lending them, why does it matter if they were going to a smoke free home? I can understand not wanting to accept clothe that were not from a smoke free house but not giving to one seems odd to me.

So I guess there are no Veterans that smoke? This doesn't even make sense. She has no "control" over who gets the clothes if she donates them to a charity.

All I can say is Are you SERIOUS?

She asked for them back? WOW, how incredibly rude! IF I was your BIL I would be so incredibly embarrassed by her behavior. When you give something to someone you don't just ask for it back so you can give it to someone else, and honestly, who cares if they smoke, it was not hurting her any. Just wow.

Super rude on her part. REALLY? Unless she really didn't want to give them away period, she's done with them and it doesn't matter who gets them next.

From the What happened: I'm glad she donated to the Veterans, but don't some of them smoke? LOL!

Was she counting on getting them back after the neighbor's kids were done with them? If not, I can't see why she should care at all.

She's selfish. If she's that bent about the clothing going to a family that could use them, SHE looks like the ridiculous one. I'm not a smoker, but I don't refrain from giving things to smokers' families. If you GIVE it way, then you give up any ownership of the item and the other party can do what they want with it. Sounds like she couldn't really let go.

What do you want to bet that smokers probably bought some of those clothes? She has...issues.

Unless she expects the clothes back when they are finished with them that is crazy.

I can't believe she went and asked for them back - massive lady balls on that one lol!

I'm sorry but that sounds really rude.

I understand your sister's feelings about not wanting her clothes to go to a smokers home. However, I can't beleive that she asked for them back, very tacky.

I usually donate my clothing to Good Will. I have no idea where it will eventually end up, but I do know it's going to help someone and that's my ultimate goal.

Uh-oh. Does she know that some Veterans are smokers?

WOW! That was a nasty thing to do smoke free or not, to ask for them back after they had already been given to the family. Was it more to this situation?

...I'd want it the other way around in the way that I wouldn't want clothes FROM a smokers house:)

Your sister sounds irrationally bold. But, at least she's got something that she so passionate about she doesn't care how rude she may be to others- she sticks to her guns! LOL.

Your sister is mean.

If your trying to use the word meaning 'really big' it is 'huge' NOT 'Hugh'. Hugh is a male name.

Well I've got news for her, plenty of veterans, AND the people who shop in the veterans thrift store, ARE smokers, so many of those items are likely to end up in smokers' homes after all.
Unless she was getting them back eventually why would she even care?

Weird :/

I have a hunch that lots of veterans are smokers. It helped them get through while they were protecting our rights and our freedom and that is why we can sit here and complain. Giving clothes away anywhere unless we choose a certain group does not give us an ability to know what their habits are. And then when you think about it even if some of us don't smoke imagine all of the other things people do that aren't particularly nice.

that is ridiculous, giving means giving without strings. Will she not give to people with brown eyes, or mustaches, or those who wear glasses? What does it matter what the receivers look like or habits are. Some places that you donate clothes to (those yellow metal bins at grocery stores or gas stations that just say "donate clothes") shred them into rags, I do dislike that when there are people who could use the actual clothes.

A different perspective, some will think it's silly but I could see myself, thinking, Ok I have these great clothes, If i can find someone that #1 can use them and #2 can take care of them, Then after the family that orignially recieved them is done with them, they could pass them along to yet another family who could use them as well and my generousity ( or good karma to the world) would be doubled.

I suppose the flaw in that logic is that the recipients could find yet another smoking family to pass them on to.

Do you not smell a difference in clothes from a smoking household vs a nonsmoking one?? I do, and i would never bother to put all the work into them to try to get them fresh again. at that point, I would know to throw them out.

Sounds like she still identifies a little with the clothing and wants to be in control of who she deems worthy to recieve them.

I'd love to hear if the sister has more to say and I'm super curious to where the clothes ended up:)

WOW! Talk about rude. If she was done with these clothes, then really why the hell does she care where they go to as long as they are no longer in her house???

Sounds like your sister most likely doesn't like the parents or the family & is using the smoking as an excuse.

In any event, I think she's unjustified in her reasoning & it was VERY rude for her to ask for it back. Wow.

The clothes were to help the kids. They are the only one she hurt, that and her hubby who probably wants to hide when he goes outside. Eeeeeep!

If I no longer wanted/needed the clothes, my thoughts would be "thank goodness it's out of my house and is no longer my concern"

At this point our civil liberties do not allow any one to tell us what to do in our own homes; as long as that activity is legal. Smoking is a legal activity.

I suppose I can understand her frustration if she was setting them aside for a garage sale, ebay or consignment shop and her husband inadvertently gave them away, but to ask for them back was tacky. She really should have just let it go in that case. (I am guessing if they were nice clothes in the first place, your sister isn't having trouble making ends meet.) There is nothing wrong with charitable giving. When you give with a cheerful heart (regardless if the people smoke or not) you reap so many rewards from it. I hope she really looks deep into herself and changes her seemingly selfish ways.
God Bless,
A.

that is the most rediculous thing I have ever heard. your sister sounds crazy. I would rather be a smoker than a judgemental, hateful, b*tch anyday.

Ditto, Jess s. But it was both my parents and no one could hate smoking more than me. I would want to help those children.

Hmmm, are the KIDS smokers? Sounds a little odd to me.

I'm GUESSING she thinks this will allow the smokers to buy MORE cigarettes because they aren't spending the money on their habit?

If she wanted the clothes back when the neighbors were done with them so she could use them again for a younger child, I would understand. I wouldn't want to get back clothes for another kid to wear, smelling of stale smoke. However, it doesn't sound like she was going to get them back. What difference who gets them? The person who buys the clothes could be a smoker. Her neighbor not getting the clothes isn't going to make her stop smoking. I think it's wierd.
For the posters who say that it's her right to do whatever she wants with the clothes, the husband should have asked, etc - if she was getting rid of them, what difference does it make? Why would mom "own" the baby/kid clothes? What if Dad had paid for all of them? Now, in my house, the kid clothes do belong to me. We have separate finances and I've always paid to clothe the kids. But we don't know that about this couple and their kid clothes.

Why on earth does she care? She's giving them away! Does she have any idea how many veterans smoke? She sounds like a nut.

I think your sister is nuts! I can somewhat understand her not wanting to donate to a smoking home (if that is her thing but that in and of itself is odd) but once the items have been freely given (and they were) it is in extreme poor taste to demand them back. In my opinion, not only does is make her husband look like a jackass it shows a lack of character on her part.

Wow, your sister has issues. The clothes are for the kids not the parents. To ask for the clothes back, just wow. She is going to be the mean old lady on the street that the kids stay away from or egg her house on Halloween..........

Thats crazy to ask for them back! I can't believe she did that. Would she have done that if they were non-smokers?