Pacifier Help

I rarely get to watch any television but occasionally catch a few minutes of SuperNanny. If you have not seen the show this probably sounds crazy but sometimes she has some great ideas. Both of my little ones are into their thumbs and fingers so I don't know from experience if this will work or not. On one of the shows they were trying to break a 2 or 3 year old from her pacifier and they told the little girl that the "pacifier fairy" needed to collect some pacifiers for all of the new babies that did not have one. They had the little girl go around the house and the parents helped her to put all her pacifiers in a bag. Then they left the bag out for the fairy to pickup and the fairy left a toy in the bags place. It seemed to put the little girl in control and made her feel like a big girl helper. Good luck.

Just this week on the Today show it was announced that the use of pacifiers does not affect the development of teeth as had always been thought. It said that the teeth of young children will shift quickly to where they would have been when the child stops the use of the pacifier.
My son never wanted a pacifier, but if he had I would have allowed it until I felt that it was interfering with things...like trying to talk with it in, taking it to preschool, etc.
I would think that weening slowly is the way to go and certainly the most loving approach.

WE made my daughter leave it in her crib and told her she could have it at nighttime only. She was very attached to it and was about 1 1/2 when we did that. Then I cut the tips and she told me it was broke. So I told her too bad, no more binky. And she amazingly let it go and never asked for it again.

Good luck!

Most experts say to take the pacifier away at 6months. The point of it is for infant comfort and strengthening oral motor skills. We tossed the paci for both my kids at six months... of course my daughter just replaced it with her thumb... and that's a whole other issue :)But, experts worry about developing teeth and so it is definitely time to take it away.

It's important to remember that the paci is a coping strategy for her and so taking it away is going to be stressful for her until she develops another way to comfort herself. And stress for her means stress for you so you have to be strong and not give in to the screams. :) Ya know how when people are nervous they wring their hands? that's because that pressure is calming. The receptors in our joints calm us when pressure is applied. Our mouths hold the majority of these receptors when is why sucking out of straws, chewing gum, smoking cigarettes, etc are enjoyed by adults. Her paci is serving the same function. I think understanding that helps parents to be more patient and not feel like a failure or that their child is just being difficult.

Some parents quit cold turkey. Throw all the pacis in the trash and deal with a couple weeks of tantrums and it's over. Other parents do it gradually. No paci during the day, but paci at night... and then no paci at night... or sometimes vice versa. I would do some research online and find a strategy that fits with your values and your ability to tolerate your child's cries for that beloved comfort. And have a lot of activities planned and on hand for quick distractions. Try hugging her, tickling her, squishing her playfully with pillows.. this gives that calming deep pressure and may help her to relax.

Good luck! and be strong!!

It needs to be taken away and told it's lost.

Hi A.,
First of all congrats on almost having her potty trained and off the bottle, it sounds like you are doing a great job. I remember hearing a few times over this very discussion, and I usually don't retain information unless I feel it's credible and useful, the advice I have been given is: don't rush or push a child into anything. It sounds like you already follow that code considering your daughter is off the bottle and almost potty trained. I'm sure your husband means well and she does need to eventually stop using the pacifier, but use your intuition, when she's ready to stop using it, she will give you signs. My daughter is almost 3 and she was off the bottle/breast at 1 year, she was a quick study and she never used a pacifier. However, she is not potty trained yet and she still uses a sippy cup. They go at their own pace. Good Luck!

This is something you have to be diligent about.... Take every pacifier that she has and cut a tiny hole in the bottom(at the tip of rubber). This makes the pacifier lose that suction........then every week cut the holes just a little larger. I did this with my son...going into the second week, he threw it down and never picked it back up. With out the suction, it doesn't give them the same sensation. But be sure you nip every one of her pacifiers.......so all feel the same way. Good Luck!!!

My younger son got weaned from the paci too early due to us forgetting it when we went on vacation out of the country. He had a horrible time trying to get to sleep without it (as did we all). We looked all over for a replacement but no store carried the exact kind he liked. By the time we got back, he wouldn't take a paci anymore but never really learned an alternate way to soothe himself. As long as your daughter's teeth are not being affected, I would not force anything on her. Some people try snipping off the end and then gradually snipping off more until it becomes unappealing to the child. My older son weaned when he was 3 and was pretty well-adjusted,. We just started putting more and more restrictions on when and where he could use one and gradually cut it out entirely.

Hope this helps,

M.

I thought it would be hard to take my son off of his "po". I took all up and cut the nipples off of a few. And placed them back in places where he liked to keep them. Ih would come to me and say "uhtoh mom po broke" so I told him to throw it away. After he got down to his last one, I cut the nipple off of that one as well. He did the same thing and never wanted his po again.

I hope this can help you like it did me.

This is so hard. They love those things so much. I've got three kiddos and two of them were weaned from their most favorite thing in the world at a little over 2 years. The youngest still has his, he just turned two. I dreaded it so, but honestly limiting the use (nap and bed time) is the best way to go, at least it was for us. Our first had just moved into a big girl bed so I waited a few weeks after that so she wasn't thrown into too much at once. We just cut the ends off like mentioned in alot of the other notes. It worked for her. My second, was another story. I believe he would have chewed on a broken one just for spite. So with him it was complete frustration at him constantly losing them. So finally, one day, we were leaving to go someplace and he was crying. I told him he lost it and it was gone forever. The look on his face broke my heart, but within a few minutes he stopped crying. And after a few nights he was as if he never had a pacy to begin with. Our third was already here, so he had his own pacy, but my son never bothered it. All that to say, find what works for you. There's alot of great suggestions so far. Just don't stress, because once it's over you'll realize it wasn't so bad. You'll do great! I have no clue yet what I'll be doing for this third one here in the next few months, so let me know what works for you!

My son had just turned 12 mos and had only taken one for about 5 mos before weaning, so it may be a little different. He was really stuffy, and I noticed that he couldn't sleep with the pacifier because he had to breathe through his mouth, so I decided that this was my chance. I stopped giving it to him for those few days that he was stuffed up, and he completely forgot about it I guess. We haven't used it since.

Refer to this request:

http://www.mamasource.com/request/recent/75019/1169852980/24

Good luck!

Jodi

Okay, I am not a big fan of Rosie O'Donald but on the View the other day she was talking about how she gets rid of her kids pacifiers. Once she is ready she makes a big deal out of it and tells them that they are getting so big and tells them the pacifier fairy is coming and she has them put the pacifier under their pillow. She tells them that the tooth fairy is going to give it to a baby that doesn't have their own pacifier. She then leaves a little something special under the pillow for the child. My children never had problems with pacifiers but I thought this was a really cute idea. Best of luck.

HI! THE SONNER THE BETTER EVEN THOUGH HER TEETH ARE THE FIRST SUCKING ON A PACIFIER WILL AFFECT THE WAY HER TEETH COME IN. HAVE YOU TAKEN HER TO THE DENTIST YET ITS ABOUT TIME TO DO SO IF NOT AND THAT COULD MAKE IT EASYER. IF SHE UNDERSTANDS POTTY TRAINING SHE SHOULD UNDER STAND THIS. YOU CAN ALLSO LET HER KEEP IT BUT SHE CANT PUT IT IN HER MOUTH. SEE IF SHE WILL GIVE IT TO HER DOLL.
ALITTLE ABOUIT ME I HAVE 6 CHILDERN TOW BOYS FOUR GIRLS

My daughter is almost 13 months and at her 12 month appointment, the Dr. recommended only giving it to her at naptime and bedtime and taking it away all together at 13 months. So, I am about to go through the very same thing, although we are moving in the next couple of weeks, so I may have to hold off for another couple of months until we get settled in our new home.

As for using it at naptime and bedtime, she took to that right away. Now, when I go in her room to get her out of her crib, she will take her binky out of her mouth and drop it and her blankie in the crib and then ask to get out. I was really surprised at how easily she adapted to that, so I am hoping the removal of the binky altogether will go as smoothly, but I am definitely going to read these responses to see how best to approach it. I would try starting with just the naptime/bedtime thing and go from there. It's working for us. Good luck!

A.,

My youngest was the same way with his paci. At about the same age, we weaned off the paci. First he only got it at bedtimes. Then I cut the very tip off the paci so that it didn't suck the same (making sure there was just a small hole in it). He was free to use it at bedtime, but decided on his own that he didn't like it so much that way. It took a couple days and it was over.

I resisted taking away my son's pacifier until he was enrolled in formal day care and came home with strep throat. My Pediatrician demanded that we rid of the paci then. She began the suggestion when he was two years and demanded it at the onset of the illness when he was three years. We snipped the end of the pacifier and then gave it to my son. He took one look at it and said "broken". We agreed and suggested that he throw it away. He complied and then asked for another. We just reiterated that it was broken and trash. Three days were tough; however, his request for his paci lessened and we stayed strong. When you decide the time is right go for it and stay strong and consistent. We also threw away ALL of the pacifiers so that we did not cave during a weak moment. Good luck.

I just took my son's away three days ago. He's 20 months and I noticed he was starting to want it during the day. Normally he just liked it for naps and bedtime, so I just took them all away when he wasn't looking, and he hasn't even seemed to notice. I thought for sure that he'd have a hard time going to sleep without it, but nope. He was totally fine. I definitely think you should take it away while she's younger. The longer you wait, that harder will be I bet.

Our goal is for our son to be rid of his by his 2nd birthday (end of March). Here's what we're doing:
A week ago we snipped the end off one of the 5 that are floating around here. He looked shocked and dismayed and threw it in the trash when I said "oh no, it's broken." I figured I'd snip one every couple weeks until they're gone. He is developing an attachment to a blanket and a bear, so those should replace the paci nicely. We encouraged the blanket/bear atachment by make it a routine when we tuck him in at night -- hug, kiss, blankie, bear (tuck the bear in next to him). The next time we snipped one it wasn't so easy. He didn't want to let go of it. I had to throw it away because he couldn't! Anyway, after that he got really worried about the paci's and kept the remaining 3 with him at all times for a week or so. He's back to just using it at night, so I'm going to move ahead with the next one....
Even though it's hard, he will get over it fairly quickly and won't remember it (he won't come to me one day when he's 20 and say "I've never forgiven you for taking my paci away..."), and he has replacement comfort objects, which is what our pediatrician recommended.

In college i was a nanny for a little girl for about 3 years (started when she was 4 mo) When she turned two, we (her parents and i, directed by them) told her that the "paci fairy" came to take big girls pacis when they turned two. She was really into princesses and fairies and stuff like that so it was pretty easy. We kept telling her that the more she waited, the more mad the fairy was going to get. One day, she collected all of her pacifiers, put them into a bag and told me that this was for the paci fairy. It was too cute.

I have a 7 mo little boy who has pacis everywhere! I'm sure it won't be that easy when he's two. But just an idea!!
I honestly think that they have to be ready to give it up. Just like potty training- they have to be ready developmentally, physically, and emotionally.

You also have to be very consistent! when you decide to get rid of the pacis- make sure they are all gone! Also, maybe you could wean her off of them- let her use it only at bed time, other times put them in the closet or on a shelf she can't reach or see- avoid temptation!
Hope that helps
Good luck

A.:

You cand ready the response I gave to Cheryl. It is a little lengthy, but in essence I never took my daughters bottle or passy away. I let her use them until she was finished with them. Would you want a bigger person coming to you, just because they were bigger and could and take whatever comfort item away from you because you were XXXX years of age? Do you like morning coffee, cigarette after dinner, ect? O.k now that you are this age you can't have those anymore.

In our society we want this likttle babies to be little adults and grow up too fast. Read "The Hurried Child." Why can't we slow down and let them be babies, toddlers, and then children. They will be grown forever. They are only babies once, let them enjoy it and you do the same.

Like I told Cheryl it is just my opinion, but I worked with 2-3 year olds for 20+ years and saw this all the time. It is just my opinion.

Besides who are the "experts" anyway? Do they have children? Or just going on what they learned in school? My daugthers teeth and psyche are intadct and she did not give up the bottle until 3 and the passy at 3.5 years of age.

J.

When my daughter was between 2 and 2 1/2, my husband and I decided that it was time for my daughter to give up her coveted binky. She was so hooked to it that she would often have more than just one on her person. One night I just told her that the Binky Fairy was going to come that night and get all of her binkies to give to a baby that really needed them since she was such a big girl and didn't need them anymore. That evening when she turned her back and handed me her binky to hold for her, I tossed it and gathered up all the others that I could find and tossed as well. When she came back for her binky I told her that the binky fairy had come and taken them for baby Tyler, a friend's baby that she knew, liked and could put a face to, because he needed them since he was a baby and she wasn't. She had a little trouble getting to sleep that night, but over all we had no problems with it. She did find a couple strays here and there and immediatly popped them in he mouth, but as soon as my husband or I saw it there, we would take it and tell her that the binky fairy forgot that one, and was looking for it. There has been no looking back since.

Good Luck!

My daughter is almost 21/2 and we have gone to letting her use her pacifier only at night and naptime. I really think if we take it away totally, she wouldn't miss it. She can do without it. Gradual weaning would probably be less stressful for all of you.

Taking her off the pacifier is going to be stressful for her. I'd recommend stepping her off of it gradually; for example, if she takes it with her everywhere, let her know it's time to only sleep with it. That alone could take several months of adjustment (and will try your patience, because your sleep and limits will be tested).

Honestly, I think she's too young if she's truly attached to it. My son gave his up when he turned 4; however, he only used it at sleeping time. His pedi explained to him how it could hurt his teeth, and that he was too grown up for it. We came home from the appointment, and he took the scissors and cut the tips off of all his pacifiers...and that was it. He was old enough to understand what was being said to him. He struggled a little with sleep that night, but not the next. If you can scale your daughter back on her use, and wait til she's old enough to understand, it will be much less traumatic for all of you.

Hope this helps...

Hi A.,
I took the pacifier away from my child at 2.5 years. I did so with the Easter Bunny and it worked wonderfully. I said the Easter Bunny took her pacifiers and left her all the treats and toys instead and explained that she is a big girl now and the Easter Bunny will bring her these treats every year for giving your pacifiers to him. It worked. She did ask for it now and again after that but I kept showing her the container where we kept them and it was empty and I just told her the Easter Bunny has then remember....never had one again!