My 7 year old son came home from day camp yesterday and stated that he and a friend he made at camp would like to call each other on the phone. Our son has never liked to talk on the phone and I figured we would get to phone rules in a couple of years with our daughter so I haven't thought much about this. Do you all have rules for children using the phone (time limits, do both sets of parents need to ok the conversation, do kids need to be a certain age before they are allowed to talk to people other than relatives on the phone)? Thanks for any help you can give us.
My 9 year old speaks to her friends all the time. We don't place restrictions on time. At that age her conversations are short. She is allowed to privacy, but usually stays in the room we are in. If you don't make a big issue of it, then they won't either. However, always keep an ear open and be ready to jump in if needed. Should be fine.
My 9-year old has just started talking to friends on the phone and I'm not sure if you need to worry about time limits, maybe do one phone call and see if you need to? It takes a little while to get used to talking on the phone, although maybe some kids are naturals! My daughter talks for about 10 minutes before she runs out of things to say! Her calls usually don't last that long.
For the first phone call you could call the mom and say that your son wants to talk to her son, and is that okay? If that's okay then I would imagine that your son could call from then on.
Our only rules are she has to ask permission first to use the phone, and we don't allow calls after 8pm. I figure we'll add on rules as we go if needed.
My daughter is 7 and loves the phone. We don't let her use it late and night, and we arent making a big deal about conversations because I dont want her to think it's a big deal. We let her talk in the living room with all of us around, or in private if she wants. When we sneak up on her to check, the conversations are still the same as in the living room. Just trying to keep the trust lines open - even though we double check :o).
I think it is great for kids to connect, even if the only way is by phone. Make sure you teach him how to use a phone. My kids will get on the phone and say "can I speak to x?" without introducing them selves or anything. Not even "hello". I have been stressing to them that they must tell the person they are calling who they are and ask to please speak to the person they are calling. I have lately had to limit the times they can use the phone. We have also had to step in because one of their friends would call early in the morning and many times a day. They can have calls between the hours of 11 am and 8 pm, and no more than 5 or 10 minutes. If they forget to tell someone something, they can call them back but no back and forth stuff. My kids are 11 though so they are reaching that goofy point.
You could see how your son does and if needed, setup some rules then.
I also think it's great he has a new friend and wants to keep in touch. I would encourage that!!
When my kids were small, I was nearby when they were on the phone with non family, just so I knew what was going on.
Just my opinion, but we didn't feel like time limits applied to boys and the phone.
We have a 15, 16 and 18 year old and so far we have been right. Most boys are not "yak-kers" on the phone.
I think it's great that he's made a friend on his own and wants to talk to him. I think the only "rule" you really need to set at this point, is times when they can call, like no calls before 10:00 am and no calls after 7:00 pm. At this age I would'nt expect him to spend lots of time on the phone, so I don't think time limits would need to be set (unless it's long distance or cell phone minutes).
