Picky Eaters

He may be more inclined to eat something that he has involvment in making. If you make spaghetti, let him put the pasta in the pot, or stir the sauce.
Good luck!

Why does he even know what a chicken nugget is? They are garbage and he never should have had them to begin with. Why would you sit and bargin with a child, at five he shold have been taught what the rules are about meal time and if he does not obey he sits in his room and enough time in there and things will change.

Try adding new foods to the ones he already eats. Have him help make food. Start with one food. For instance try different types of jelly in PB&J or new toppings on pizza. Even adjust Ramen to make it more authentic. Slowly add leeks, carrots, corn, broccoli, cabbage or baby bok choy. Make it fun!

Pick your battles carefully but the important thing is that if you really want him to eat "a bite" of something (a battle you are willing to fight for) -- then you need to be willing to follow through with the "line" you have drawn. You need to finish what you have started and be the one that "wins" in the end -- not him. If he continues to not do what you want him to do, you are teaching him to "disobey" the authority that is over him -- that will translate into school, work, and any other authority that is over him in his lifetime. Another issue here is "gratefulness" for what is put before him -- food in this case). We have friends in Haiti that take care of children off the street that will go without food for days. Mothers will hand their children over to you because they have a better chance to live with you than with them -- we have so much to be grateful for and our children need to learn this as well!

May you consistently draw your lines and win the battles.

N. S.

I, too, have a picky eater, now a teenager. I feel your frustration! But I'm a big believer in keeping stress minimal when it comes to food. Your child will broaden his horizons as he gets older and, if he remains picky, so what - as long as he's eating a healthy diet and taking his vitamins. Power struggles over food and NOT WORTH IT - the child ALWAYS wins, but not before both sides suffer major stress attacks. I'd relax a bit, I think (this is in retrospect, of course!!)

I., I completely feel your pain about being frustrated when your son won't even try something. I have to tell you, though, it sounds like you've got a leader on your hands! I highly recommend the book "You Can't Make Me" by Cynthia Tobias. It is about how to help you cope with a strong willed child. I read it because I have a strong willed 3 year old and it has helped SO MUCH in understanding where she is coming from. Strong willed children are pre-programmed to change the world. Count this as a blessing!

Your son sounds exactly like me as a child. If something seemed even the slightest bit funky to me, I wouldn't touch it, no matter what punishments my dad threatened me with. Part of it was a control thing, but the other part of it was that I just had (and still have) a very sensitive palate. Things with very strong flavors overwhelm me and I simply cannot eat them - they activate my gag reflex.

My angelic mother would make me a separate meal if the family was having something that I didn't like. I cannot tell you how loved this made me feel. She understood and sympathized with my plight and went out of her way to help me. Because she did this, whenever possible, I would try a new food for her. But only because she never pushed me into it.

Over the years, I have slowly added new foods that I previously couldn't eat. As long as you don't come down on your son too hard, I'm sure he'll eventually get more adventurous.

You are such a great mom to try and get help for your precious son. He is very lucky to have you!

Good luck!

I.,

Your sons diet sounds pretty similar to my 3 yr old sons. He is now eating some different foods like carrots and veggie juice. It took about a year of putting the carrots on his plate before he would even try them. Besides that he eats pizza (sometimes), fruit, chicken nuggets, cheese sandwiches, pb&j, quesadillas (hide a little veggies or meat in them), rice and noodles. If we push our son too much he won't eat stuff. I just continue to put the different foods on his plate and he will eventually try it. He finally tried a hamburger last week. I always make sure there is 1 item on his plate that I know for sure he will eat.

L.

Do you like to cook? if so, i recommend picking up the cookbook Deceptively Delicious by Jessica Seinfeld (Jerry Seinfeld's wife). She give you tride and true recipes on how to hide vegetables in food that kids DO eat! last night i made chicken nuggets with broccoli puree...they were SO good and the kids gobbled them up! Give it a shot.

Stick to your guns. If he goes to bed hungry, he will eat what you put in front of him, guaranteed. I have a 4 and 2.5 year old (#3 is on the way). They must try everything once, no way around it (unless it's too spicy). You are the parent, you decide.
I always keep in mind that if I lived in another country, especially a poor one, he'd be eating anything put in front of him. Don't let him dictate to you. It's called manipulation.
good luck

Hi I.,
I think you will enjoy this article entitled, "How do I Deal With My Picky Eater." Here is the link: http://www.frugalparentsonline.com/Picky_Eater.html

I am lucky that all 3 of my kids are good eaters and love veggies, but my husband on the other hand is like your five year old. My mom turned me onto Jessica Seinfeld's Cookbook. I purchased mine at Costco. She has three picky eaters and has devised a way to include more veggies as well as meat into meals that she knows her kids will eat. It is very helpful and full of great tips. Since I am dealing with a picky adult a lot of the recipes don't quite work, but her methods can be used with almost any dish. My husband is now getting lots of veggies without knowing the difference and my kids are getting EXTRA veggies. I now have no problem with the 5 servings of fruits and vegetables.

Hi ! Oh dear , to give a 5 year old spare ribs for the first time and then ground him - because he made a mistake ...
oh my ...how to start ... I always had a little altar in my home , a place with fresh flowers and a very old icon of Christ & Mary and other beautiful reminders of God ... so when we make food , we always make a decorative plate with a tiny piece of each item , and offer it to GOD first , ring the bell ...wait for some moments and with Thanks and Praises we put the food back in the big pot - so it mingles , and that's what we eat . Food that has been offered to God . Other families pray before they start eating together .
To have the whole family-quality-dinner-together-time become a competition -
makes it all so harsh and so forceful - how can anybody enjoy food and eating together if it's a eating - competition ....and ground a child who cannot imagine to eat those ribbbbbbbs .....
Oh Dear , Good Luck !

I. - here are some tips to try:

1. Read some kid-oriented books about healthy eating (Fruit FLies Picnic and Eat Healthy, Feel Great - these will open up some dialogue between the two of you.

2. We have something in our home that is called "The Chicken First Then The Crap" rule - I make our plate as usual and then add something new I want them to try. Potato chips were always easy. They will eat the chips and then want more - I would say - piece of new food please - this needs to be immediate gratification so have the chip in your hand ready to give - as soon as they ate the chicken or whatever it was they got the chip. I make the piece on the smaller side. We had maybe two meals where they would not eat the new food and they were excused without dinner. Once they got the message that I was serious they participated begrudginly.

My twins are not 6 3/4 and are phenomenal eaters. They eat greek, sushi, indian, raw fruits and veggies - and they will try anything we give them.

It is hard at first but the payoff is fantastic. Let me know if you want more ideas! S.

My six year old was a picky eater too. I tried everything to get him to just take at least one bite but nothing helped. It seemed to just take patience. I just kept putting a little bit of everything on the plate and I would encourage him to try. My husband and I would tell him that we liked it. He never really tried any of it but sometime he would taste it with his tongue. I really think it is a phase that most kids go through and you just have to wait it out. I think it helps as they get older and they can understand the concept of trying new things.

Hi I.. You know his diet doesn't sound that bad to me. I think it is just a phase and it may pass....or it may not. My brother is 23 and is still eating just like your 5 year old. I would think that eating these things is better than not eating and going to bed hungry...trust me I have been desperate too, only to find that my children are stronger willed than me also. As long as he is developing fine I would let him be and try occasionally to get him to eat new things.

:) C.

Hi. I have sons, 5 and 3. My 3 year old is the picky one, or just plain stubborn. I've found that turning mealtime into a battleground just makes him dig his heels even deeper. What worked recently was a reward chart that I used for both kids. The chart hasn't worked as much as the sibling rivalry: I started putting extra stickers and praising my 5 year old enthusiatically whenever he ate something nutritious or new. The younger one wasn't being punished, but felt ignored and that bothered him. Although he's still not licking his plate clean, he takes bites out of things he normally wouldn't and that's the whole point, right?
Hope this helps...
L.

My oldest was a picky eater when she was young. It was a real power struggle. I tried everything to get her to eat. At one point, I believe she stopped eating food altogether because she wanted control. She lost weight, it was scary. Finally, I told her (she was almost 3 at the time) "Fine, if you want to starve, go ahead". It seemed when I gave up, she was ok with eating. It was a real struggle and I really was at my wits end when I said that..I think she knew I meant it. Anyway, she's definitely the kid in the family that keeps us on our toes - she's now 15 - and we're still going through the struggle (just not w/food).

So, my advice would be, don't make it an issue. He may not get any satisfaction out of the attention he gets (or lack thereof) once you and your husband don't make it an issue anymore.

I don't really know if it will work, but maybe your son just thrives on the negative attention he's getting w/the food for now. If he doesn't get the attention, maybe he'll change his perspective on food?

Dear I.,

From what you say your son will eat he will not starve! There is a possibility of him experiencing real problems from the pressure it sounds like he is under at five years old! I am a mother too and I know the feeling of contentment we mothers experience seeing our child eat :) but coercion or pressure + food is almost never a good combination. It can lead to all kinds of problems including eating disorders (even for boys), unnecessary power struggles, and a whole lot of unhappiness. Just keep providing healthy choices without pressure and over time I'm sure you'll find he'll be adding new foods to his plate and you can relax... he will not starve in the process! ; ) All the best to you & your family!

p.s. Just one more thing I want to share that I hope for our children's sake we'll all try to remember: "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." (Luke 6.31) applies to our own children too!!

Here's a short article that shows how we can put this into practice in our roles as parents:
http://www.nara-licensing.org/displaycommon.cfm?an=1&...

I have known quite a few picky eaters in my time, and was one for quite a few years. A lot of my pickiness stemmed from anxiety about trying new things.

You may try having your picky eater help you in meal time preparations. He can help plan the meal, start off with things he likes then add options. You could have a make your own pizza night with English muffins and pizza toppings in separate dishes, Allowing him to choose his toppings can give him a sense of control over the situation at hand. Baked potatoes night is also a good one. I have seen very picky eaters branch out in the make your own meal nights.

You could also offer options at meal times, begin by offering these options to the others at the table and then offer them to your picky one. Would you like peas or carrots on your plate? Would you like gravy on the meat or on the side so you can dip it?

Which brings me to another item, Finger foods. You can break down a menu into finger food items (Steamed broccoli and cheese sauce, Turkey strips and Gravy dip, Veggie Dippers, an on.) Having the food broken down into smaller pieces makes sampling less daunting.

As far as his yogurt you can offer different toppings he can try, set up a small pinch bowl with the topping(s) (granola, fruit, cereal, chopped nuts etc) then set a small portion of his yogurt in a bowl, Allow him to add mix-ins himself and stir it up. If he tries it and does not care for it, ask him what he didn't like about it. (Was it too salty, too mushy, too bitter or sour?) You might find that there is a particular texture or taste he has an aversion to. He can try a different combination or enjoy his yogurt plain and you can try again next time.

My daughter hates mashed potatoes or mashed sweet potatoes to this day... Good luck, and don't worry too much, if he gets hungry he'll eat. And no one died from too many peanut butter sandwiches. And don’t forget to reward him when he tries new things.

First, figure out if you're more upset (or worried) about him not getting the "proper" nutrition, or if it's more about him not listening and the power struggle. Sure, it's frustrating when our kids don't do what we know is best for them, but as long as he is eating something, chances are, he'll be okay, and that this is just a phase. Try some tips from "Deceptively Delicious." If he eats Ramen noodles, stir in a few tablespoons of jarred baby squash (I think the fresh might be detected by your son at first). Then, sneak other things into foods after that (pureed sweet potatoes work well). My best tip is to start making fruit smoothies. Go to Trader Joes and buy frozen pineapple, mango and blueberries. Buy a container of flavored yogurt. Have your son help by dropping the fruit into the blender. Add milk or juice, and a banana. They taste SO good. My 2 kids ask for them twice per day. It takes virtually no effort, and they're getting a full day's worth of fruit, plus calcium and protein. You can even add a scoop of Kids protein/vitamin powder. Good luck! Remember...it will pass...probably when he starts school.

HI I.,

If I were you I would just continue what you're doing. Offer him food that everyone else is eating. If he won't eat it he'll just have to be hungry until the next meal. Believe me, he won't go hungry for long!

It's often been told to me that children need to see a new food 10 times before they will try it. I have seen this happen with my own children and I think it's completely true. I think it's also true that children have much more sensitive taste palates than adults. Spicy foods really freak my kids out. I know this and I never serve anything spicy at home. If my husband and I want spicy we put hot sauce on our food.

I wouldn't ground him or punish him if he doesn't want to eat if I were you. Food can easily become a power trip for kids. Just make sure he's not filling up on something else after meals. Obviously if he doesn't eat he shouldn't have dessert or other treats.

Pizza, if it's a decent quality frozen or homemade, PBJ, again decent quality on whole wheat bread, fresh fruit and yogurt are all pretty good for you if you think about it. Peanuts are filled with Niacin and protein. The regular peanuts are also filled with pesticides and many peanut butters are filled with added trans fats, so look for organic peanut butter. It doesn't cost that much more in the scheme of things. Use good quality all fruit spread rather than the regular stuff. Try to increase the healthy qualities of what he will eat rather than forcing him to try stuff he doesn't want to eat. Eventually he will come around and in the meantime you won't have to worry too much.

Good luck,
H.

A couple of things....I have 3 kids...all girls and sometimes they are picky but my motto is...if I make it that is all there is for dinner..I dont make different meals....They have to eat what I make or else they are hungry. Have you also tired the cookbook by Jessica Seinfeld. It incorporates veggies into all the foods that kids love and they won't know the difference.....

I wouldn't worry too much at this age, many children are very picky. As long as he is eating a vitamin and getting protein, carbs, fiber, etc. he should be fine. There is a book by Jerry Seinfelds wife called deceptively delicious, and it shows ways to sneak veggies and such into everyday foods.

My children are grown. But my granchildren, now 5 and 8, were very picky eaters as you describe your son. Their parents and we, the grandparents, insisted they at least try everything and if they don't like it they don't have to eat it. If the same thing is served at another meal, even that same week, they have to try it again. If they refuse to try it there are consequences such as no tv, taking away a favorite toy, etc. These children's eating habits completely turned around after a short time. There is still a lot they don't like, but they try everything and found they even like broccoli and spinach which surprised me!

Hi! It can be very exhausting but I had 5 girls and the last one was so picky that it drove me crazy, I went to a doctor and a nutritionist for years because I was so concerned that she have her vegies and eat healthy, the doc told me not to stress myself and the other family members out one month she would only eat mac cheese and the other month she would eat a packed pot with plain yogurt and another month somethings else... I would continue to put creamed style corn on her plate and broccoli, peas and steamed carrots with honey and now she eats them, example is everything when she saw us eat like that eventually now she does and even to this day is still picky , I made a lot of healthy milk shakes to fill in the blanks, also, I found that when she spent the night over at some one else's home that I trusted she ate just fine over there, so sometimes seeing her friend or cousin eat whats on their plate she did too, the bigger deal I made of it the harder it was for me and the more separated our relationship became . I would have a certain day that each child could request supper each child having their day to put in their request and when it came to the picky child she too had her day to request her meal for the week on her day. Now I have 4 grand children and some of them are picky too. I as a child had a parent who pushed me to eat everything on the table and too many nights I went to bed hungry and every one in the house was upset, its not worth it and no child should go to bed hungry , that happens to much in third world country's and sadly enough here too.God bless.

I am not trying to sound mean, but you really need to choose your battles, its not the end of the world that he doesnt want to try new foods, I really think you should let it go, he will eat more one day, I promise.
As far as grounding him for that, I think thats very very mean, I feel like if your going to ground him for this, what will you do when he really does something bad?
Choose your battles,
Good Luck

Sounds like your son has made food a battle ground and you are now on the losing side. Try to pull back over battles over food for a week or two and see what happens, it's probably a phase, a way to assert himself in an area he feels he has control over (and you). If you can add some quiet time alone with him at night, 10-15 minutes of floor play of anything quiet (puzzles, etc) he can choose to play, for a week or so as well. In terms of nutrition, it's better to look at nutrition as a longer term thing as opposed that each meal needs to be balanced. If at the end of a week, you feel there is balance over all, then he's probably fine.

This happens to the best of kids. Tell your hubby that too. Part of it, is that at certain ages, they go through "picky eating" phases. It's common, it's normal, it's what happens as part of their development etc. They are not necessarily "trying" to be difficult... they are just going through phases. Here is a link for information, so that you can see that you are not the only one with this problem & it gives a lot of tips:
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&client=firefox-a&a...

Picky eating can be due to a lot of reasons. All I know is that "grounding" them is not going to make it better. It's a negative reinforcement, AND he is only 5 years old. C'mon.
Both my children (ages 5 and 1 yr.) at different ages, went through picky eating stages. But it passes. I just try not to "stress" about it or to put them down for it. I just try to make eating fun. Sure some days I have no patience, but I don't put that guilt on my kids and I grit my teeth through it. I know it's not easy. But at the same time... for me personally, I do not want to give my kids "hang-ups" about food or force them to eat, which can then spiral out of control or make them have eating disorders later. My Hubby has a great way of "helping" our oldest child to eat different things... he makes jokes and makes it sound fun... and they giggle and they actually will try the foods and eat it TOGETHER. Or they all put on a silly hat, and try their "goofy" food and act like food critics... for each bite they can say something silly about the food...BUT they have to actually chew and swallow the "sample" food. Then before you know it, my girl has actually eaten a serving of it. Tah-dah! Yes, it takes time at meal time, but you have to have patience and actually take the time at dinner and let them not feel "rushed" about it, or they will shut-down. That's what you don't want.

Anyway, I think the parent stresses about it, then it upsets the child... then the child shuts-down and resists. At least for our child it does. Pressuring them doesn't help in our case. At the same time, you can't just order everything from the menu either, so calmly just explain the "rules" and stick to it... don't harp on them, eat your food and make it sound SOOO delicious and like a happy event.. .and sometimes this gets them out of their shell and they will try the food. If not, well they go without eating.... at their choice, but they must stay at the dinner table as we finish eating. For us, we rather not "force" them to eat, but they must try to be polite about it and be at the dinner table with us.
We go through this in our house too. This is what we do. My oldest, my girl, goes through periods of eating anything and eating well, then being picky and not being a good eater. But.... she is not starving. She's growing and is healthy, so this is not going to doom her.
My friend on the other hand, has a list of various foods on the fridge... from this list, her daughter gets to choose 1 NEW food to try... if she does, then she gets a star sticker. She said this works for them. For my girl on the other hand, this method did not work. Each child is different... try different approaches and see what works for your boy. At least he IS eating... just not want we, the Parent hopes for.

Jerry Seinfeld's wife has a book, in which she purees vegetables into all the foods she cooks... thus, the child doesn't "know" there are veggies in it, and they eat it. She was on Oprah too. I forget what the book was called though.

Good luck and take care,
~Susan
www.cafepress.com/littlegoogoo

I have a 4 year old that is the same way. I can sometimes bribe her to try new things, but not very often. I've read that if you just put it (whatever the new "it" is) on their plate and say nothing... and if they don't eat it, fine, but you keep putting it on their plate and after 10 times (approx) they will eventually try it. It's hard to do this so I don't know if it actually works yet! I also heard about a book called The Sneaky Chef by Missy Chase Lapine (simple strategies for hiding healthy foods in meals that they already love). I am planning to buy this book this week. :)K.

I'm 50ty with two grown girls and a 6 year old with medical issues so must be on a gluten free diet. I really wouldn't make an issue out of it. He will find his way and he is old enough to decide what he likes. The less pressure he feels the more he will come around. Alot of the time kids will try what they see other kids eat. Ask some of the other moms what there kids have tried. Have a play date with an asortment of different things. It may be fun to leave them alone and see what's eaten and what is not. Listen if possible but don't make it obvious,they like their secrets.
The resturant thing i would suggest getting a menu first and talk it over and if he only wants french fries so be it. It's less stress for the whole family. It's not bad on the wallet either. Good Luck

He'll grow out of it! The most you can do is keep a bag of chicken nuggets in your freezer for him so you know he's not hungry. I wouldn't stop trying to offer him other foods since you never know when something will spark his interest. I don't agree with grounding a child for eating or not! Next time you go to a restaurant, limit his choices to the things you know he'll eat, and then praise him for doing so. Talk about nutrition and growing to be big and strong like his dad, a superhero etc. Tell him things like carrots will help him see better like superman, spinach will help him grow muscles like popeye etc. Good luck and don't worry.

I.,

I think you've received some great advice. Here's one thing I'd like to add:

If your child is trying something in a restaurant for the first time, make sure it's something that you would be happy to pack up and eat at home if he does not finish it - especially if it's meat. My boyfriend's son is a picky eater, and I have made it a rule that he is not allowed to experiment with meat dishes unless someone else at the table will eat it if he does not. The reason is that AN ANIMAL WAS KILLED - and if it goes to waste, that is unconscionable.

Also, the idea of "trying" something, should be specific: You have to eat 1/2 of it, or 5 bites - otherwise you are setting your self up for an automatic "I don't like it" - which is a waste of time and it will continue to be frustrating to you.

Good luck!

When my daughter was younger and not inclined to eat anything she didn't like the look of, I was super stubborn and not willing to let her not eat what the rest of us were eating... SO, I devised the following plan... I blindfolded her! She had to eat one bite without seeing it. IF she liked it, she had to eat it no matter what it looked like when she took the blindfold off. IF she didn't like it when she was blindfolded, she could have a sandwich, or in your son's case, chicken nuggets, lol...

It was great!! It worked like a charm!! My daughter is 12 now and she doesn't think twice about eating something she has never seen before!!

Huggles!!
~S.~

You've got to get the book by Seinfeld's wife called "Deceptively Delicious". Here's a link...http://www.deceptivelydelicious.com/site/
I have a picky eater too, and she LOVES the mac and cheese. What she doesn't know is that there are carrots, sometimes butternut squash, or pumpkin mixed in with the cheese!

Honestly, it sounds like he's got a pretty decent diet. Have you tried "hiding food"? Like veggie nuggets instead of chicken. Does he like pancakes? I used to make "veggie cakes" alongside dinner-pancakes with frozen veggies like corn and carrots mixed in...or veggie and chicken pizza?
It could also be his age. That he's trying to exercise some control over his life. I noticed that he's the middle child, could this be a bid for attention? Not that he doesn't get plenty I'm sure, but sometimes kids are funny that way (I cite my oldest when my toddle was born).
In the meantime, rest assured that he'll come around eventually. But sometimes it can take a while. New foods can be scary, it's kinda like having a security blanket with familiar foods. It took me until adulthood to eat oatmeal, bell peppers, jelly other than grape, ranch dressing, Thai, and too many other things to count. But I'm healthy, I'm happy and your son will be too. (I know what a pain it can be, and how frustrating it is, I'm not dismissing your concern, I'm just trying to give you hope.) He'll get there when he's ready.
Good Luck,
K.

It's pretty cruel to ground your 5 year old because he didn't know what ribs are. He is still new to the world. Think about how what you do and say to him will shape his world view. Be compassionate!

I.,
My oldest son was the same way. Infact he and your little picky eater only ate the same things. All i can say is they grow out of it. It is ok if he only eats peanut butter three times a day. Eventually his body will require more nutrition and he will crave more and more foods as he grows older. (My son use to throw up right at the table when we made him try new things.) I finally relaxed and soon he added more and more varieties of healthy food to his lists of things to eat and now he will try anything at least once and usually likes it!! This didn't happen overnight, he is now 14... very healthy and active.

I.,

I did want to point one issue that might help (I am dealing with a picky 5 yr old again). Children's taste buds are constantly maturing and changing. So something they tried last week and hated might be just fine today. That is why I go by the one bite theory. It is fun to watch their faces when they realize that they liked what they just put in their mouth.
I am also trying to patiently go through this with my 5 yr old (I also have an 18 and 2 16 yr. olds that are healthy eaters now) but sometimes I must tell you I just want to scream out of frustration with the whole thing. Hang in there, be loving but firm and one day you will cook a meal that everyone eats.

I also am dealing with the picky eating husband but we have gotten to the point that if he doesn't want to eat what I make he puts together something for himself. But I have him take a bite first so his son can see that the rules apply to everyone

Hope this helps,

Evelyn

Your son sounds just like mine (he's 4 1/2). Even the foods are just about the same. My son is very strong willed and it does not matter what you threaten to take away it does not sway him. He will even tell you "taking that away will not make me change". I think you just have to stick to your guns. If there is no other food made for him he will eat if he is hungry enough. My pediatrician always tells me unless there is a bigger issue, "children do not starve themelselves. As long as he has energy and is not laying around all the time without the energy to play, then he is doing fine". Another reminder he tells me is to look at his food intake for a week rather than a day. Kids often naturally know what they need so they might eat a lot of one thing one day and something else another to fill their bodies needs. It's a tough battle, but as long as he has energy to play i am sure he's fine! Good luck!

Hi I.- Our rule when the children were young was "here's what we are having for breakfast/lunch/dinner (whichever) try it and if you don't like it say "no thank you" and you may go make yourself a turkey or PB and J sandwich. Having to make their own was at first a novelty but it gets old fast....did I mention they had to clean up after themselves?....and the only choice was the turkey or PB and J sandwich. Soon they would try what was offered and soon began eating with us. I never made a big issue of it so no attention was really given to it. Grounding or punishment shouldn't be an option where food is concerned. Keep in mind that the whatever the "offense" is the punishment should match. Grounding or taking away snacks or videos doesn't have much to do with teaching the child to "try" a food. Always give an option where you come out on top..."would you like carrots tonight or corn" Also if you let him have some control over what he eats you will be more successful....let him help cook or make food with you. There's alot to be said about "ownership" Good luck.......C...ps. my kids are 24,21 and 16 and are "fabulous eaters of healthy only foods now!"

Dear I.,

I believed in trying one bite - then eat it if you like, but once you've tasted it you don't have to eat it if you don't like it . . . my battle with my son was veggies - especially peas. I used to make peas with American cheese, and after watching my little girl gobble them up one night, I insisted my son try just a bite. Well, after he vomited the peas on the rest of his dinner, I never pushed him to try anything again! (= You've got to pick your battles, and this sounds like this is fast becoming a test of wills. I would wait this out. Make sure he's getting his vitamins . . . You can try one of the books out right now about using purees to hide vegetables in kids' foods . . . but if it's an issue of trying anything different than what his kick is right now, that may not help. When I was dating my ex-husband, my mother-in-law kept things on had for my very, extremely picky brother-in-law - frozen nuggets, corndogs, etc. She didn't make a different dinner for him, but he could do it for himself instead of eating what the family was having. The other thing he would eat for dinner frequently was peanut butter toast. He was obviously older than you son is (I think he was 11 when I met the family) - but this was her option to not making two separate meals, and to fighting with him over eating things he didn't like or want to eat . . . I think your son will grow out of this stage if you sit back and NOT make it a control issue - but you might want to keep my mother's-in-law solution in mind for later, just in case . . .

Good luck!
B.

Gosh, I dunno, but I do know that there are 3 things that you cannot force a child to do: eat, talk or use the bathroom. They actually do have control over these things. What does he eat for lunch at school?? My little one was pretty picky, too and when she went to preschool, the policy was that they all ate together family style and the school prepared the food. (unless of course there were allergies.) She went for about a week without eating much and then started to eat the food. I was surprised and thrilled!! Then when she went to Kindergarten, she wanted to bring "home lunch" but the majority of kids ate the school lunch, so now she eats that. It has really broadened her horizons. She is still picky at home, but she tells me that at school, she eats celery with "dip" which turns out to be ranch dressing, so I got some dip and now she eats raw veggies!!

Don't stress too much about it, and if you try and force him to do something it may become a power struggle which is bad for both parties because he has control of what he eats. Anyhoo, just try and put him into situations (i.e. school lunch) where he has no choice and see where it leads...

My daughter was also a picky eater I think they all go through a stage of it. Anyways, one of the ways I got my 6 yr old daughter to start eating some of the foods was by having her help me prepare our meals. She wouldn't eat meat loaf so one night I told her maybe she could make it taste better by making it. So she helped me make it and she said it tasted a lot better. She cleaned her plate. For sandwiches I bought the food markers (Michaels or a cake store sells them) and she can color the bread, we also make different shapes out of the sandwiches with cookie cutters and color them. Hope this helps.

Let me say, my 6 year old has always been like this and is only getting worse! He hates sandwiches in his lunch and only wants "snacks". I've come to realize, there's certain times I just have to give him whatever we're having, like you said. Other than that, I always keep in mind that children regulate themselves. Once in a while, my son will become ravenous and eat everything in the house - twice! Then, he goes back to being picky. He's healthy though and, at this point, that's all that matters. Your son is getting enough nutrition from just what you wrote that he'll eat! If you're worried, try some of the crazy tricks of hiding veggies in other things, etc. But, in the end, if it worries you that much - forget ASKING him to try something - go for flat out TELLING him. No "consequence" or "grounding" just plain ol' DO IT! It sounds harsh, but, don't fall into my trap of giving him too much power! You're the grown up, you know better, and he's the kid!
It's a hard one for me to write that, but I'm learning that all the choices I've been giving my son have only hurt him.
Good luck!!!

Hello Picky Eaters Mommas,

Okay, been there done that. Here is my advice. Worked wonders for (me)! That is really what its all about. If mom is happy the family is happy. My pediatrician recommended I log each and every morsel my son put into his mouth for two weeks. No need for date and time, just list the type of food and quantity. Then review the two week journal for "nutrition" gaps. Was my son getting calcium (check) was my son getting fruits and veggies? (check) was my son getting protein? (check) and so on. She reminded my that my son was learning his boundaries and trying out his new skills (a good sign) and that rather than fight him on having peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and cheerios day in and day out...I should focus on nutrition. My job was to make sure he had all of his vitamins and nutrients regardless of the type of foods they were delivered by. I did the recording and my son was just fine. He eventually grew out of his insistence on certain foods and began to try new foods on his own. I encouraged him by using those toothpicks with the fancy ribbon on top. I chopped new foods up into cubes and put them on a white plate with a pretty toothpick in each one and let him pick his favorites. He loved it! It was like he was being presented with a gift each night. He soon learned to love broccoli this way! Now he is 13 and 5'6" tall and eats me out of house and home but I am proud to say he is a healthy and happy young man. We no longer have to "do" toothpicks but he does remember them! He will use this trick when he becomes a father!

Hi I.,
A couple of things I've tried with my children is giving them their fruit or vegetables first while I'm getting their main course ready. Usually they're really hungry and then they're more likely to try something new. One tip that Dr. Bill Sears recommends is putting out an ice cube tray with healthy foods and that can be a "nibble tray" where your children can come and graze. You can put out sliced up raw fruits, vegetables, raw nuts, etc.

Another thing we've done is Juice Plus+ gummies with our children. I started this 2 1/2 years ago when my children were 3 and 13 months. Juice Plus+ is just fruits, vegetables and grains in a tasty gummie (or chewable or capsule). It just gives me peace of mind b/c we get 17 fruits and vegetables a day in addition to what I'm feeding them. That way when they refuse to eat something I know they've had healthy food going into them from the Juice Plus+. It has also helped to retrain their palette to crave more fruits and vegetables. Last night my 5 year old had 3 helpings of brussel sprouts! I was only going to have her eat 3 little ones...she ended up having 8 by the end of dinner! Dr. Sears talks about how this happens.

If you'd like more information you can check out: www.JP4GoodHealth.com

It's really made a huge difference for our family. I hope this helps.
Thanks,
J.

Have you tried the reward system? Get a poster board and a bunch of stickers. Have him get involved in decorating it with paint or sticks and leaves etc. Then divide the poster board into a graph. Every time he tries something new he gets a sticker to put in the box of his choice and a coin 25cents...or whatever. When he has saved up enough money you can go to his favorite toy store and pick out a special toy. You may be surprised. He may just decide to try 3 new things in one night.
Be prepared with lots of coins. Good Luck,

Jamie S

Try the cookbook- Deceptively Delicious by jerry seinfeld's wife Jessica. I have 2 that are picky with veggies and they have loved her recipes. My 2 year old has had more veggies in the past 2 weeks than in the past 2 years. (she even hated baby food that my other picky one loved). I found it at Costco for about $14. Its all about pureeing veggies and hiding them in foods kids love. Good luck.