Post Partum Depression - Olathe,KS

Updated on March 11, 2011
A.P. asks from Olathe, KS
14 answers

I just had my son on 2/27/11. This is my first baby, however the labor was complicated. I ended up having a c section, which resulted in 2 blood patches for spinal headaches and that resulted in me having to stay in bed for 72 hrs straight in my room when I went home. I wasn't able to do anything for my son. Now that I have been up and about since Sunday, 3/6/11, I find myself very disoriented. I have absolutely no desire to hurt myself or my baby, but I just feel kind of blah. I was so nervous today, as this was my first day actually at home by myself w/ my son. It went pretty well and I actually had energy to shower and dress and even put makeup on. I think I just hate being in the house. In addition, I have a pup that just turned 1yr old. He has adapted to the baby pretty well and is more protective and curious than anything else, but I feel so guilty for not being able to give him the same love and attention I gave him before. He doesn't seem to be acting out b/c of it, but I don't want him to get depressed. I still try to take him out to play when the weather is nice, but it's just hard. I also find that I feel even more depressed at nighttime when the sun goes down. I have a very supportive husband, but the adjustment has just been very hard for me, not to mention my son has a clubfoot and just got his first cast this week. Anyone have any advice for me. I don't want to feel so pitiful, but I don't want it to get worse either.

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So What Happened?

THANKS SO MUCH TO EVERYONE!!! i AM BACK TO MY OLD SELF AND JUST LOVE SO MUCH BEING A MOM. MY SON IS MY ABSOLUTE WORLD!! YOU ALL TOLD ME IT WOULDN'T BE LIKE THIS FOREVER AND IT'S NOT!! I LOVE THIS COMMUNITY!! THANKS FOR ALL YOUR KIND WORDS AND WISE ADVICE!!

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J.M.

answers from Boston on

Doesn't sound like PPD. Blues are VERY normal. Take it one day at a time. Get some rest and accept help if offered. Hang in there

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C.C.

answers from Sacramento on

Please call your doctor and discuss this with him or her. I had PPD (horrible PPD - I didn't want to hold the baby, didn't want to feed her, cried all the time for no apparent reason, etc.), so I know how it feels. I think some amount of "baby blues" is normal, but it should only last a few days. If you're still having trouble, I would definitely speak with your doctor. There's medicine that's safe to use while breastfeeding (if you are) that can help you. When I started taking the meds (my doctor prescribed Zoloft), the effect was almost instantaneous. I felt better in a matter of a few days, was able to sleep better, was able to bond with my baby, etc.

Congrats on becoming a mom! It's a big step, so give yourself time to adjust, and permission to feel tired and worn out. Lack of sleep plays a huge factor. Once you can get your baby on an eat-play-sleep schedule, things will be more even keel and you'll be able to plan your day a little better. That helps, too. =) Hang in there!!

3 moms found this helpful

H.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

You sound similar to me, following the birth of my first child. However, I didn't have the complications after the c-section that left me bed-ridden. What caught my Dr's attention, was the fact that at my 1 week post-op check, I told her it was "a definite life adjustment", and then again at my 6 week check-up I told her the exact same thing.
I did NOT reject my son in the least! In fact, I had a hard time letting anyone else do anything! I felt like I needed to do it ALL. I don't know why, as I have a supportive husband and very supportive family, but I felt the need to do it all, as the mother. My Dr suggested some anti-depressants, so I agreed. It took a few tries before we found one that worked for me (and I was breast feeding), but once we did, I DID notice a drastic difference. I'm not a pill pusher, but it definitely helped. If you don't want to take any meds, certain vitamins help more with mood elevation (discuss with your Dr), as does sun exposure, exercise, and a healthy diet. Regardless, I suggest you talk with your Dr - he/she should be a good ear if nothing else.
Bottom line - you are NOT alone! Hang in there - it DOES get better! :)

1 mom found this helpful

R.M.

answers from Seattle on

Congratulations on the birth of your beautiful son.

You are doing great, the fact that you got dresses and put make up on is very impressive!
Try not to worry about PPD, at the moment your hormones are all over the place and you'll be feeling up and down.This is normal and you'll feel a little out of it for a little while. Sleep deprivation doesn't help either.

Hang in there, you're doing great.

R.

1 mom found this helpful

S.L.

answers from Kansas City on

You are tired, alone with a baby, life has changed and you just need to take an hour at a time and try to just sit and enjoy holding the baby, play with the dog when you can but dogs adjust easily, rest every chance you get with even a short nap, and life will get better. I had a child who had to have a cast on her leg and that really made me sad and I cried when they put it on, etc. but it never bothered her at all and she acted as if it wasn't even there. Be glad they can fix it and it's not something worse. You have a new baby, take time getting to know him. 'Time' is the key here. Do you know anyone you could call during the lonely times? I found other mothers support very helpful when my kids were little and I couldn't get out but was lonely. Also my first one was a preemie and I felt a bit overwhelmed the first day I was home alone with him. I know how you are feeling but it will get so much better each day.

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D.G.

answers from Houston on

If you think you have post-partum depression, definitely talk to your doctor, they can help.

At the very least they can screen you for thyroid disease and vitamin deficiencies to make sure everything is ok. Sometimes pregnancy triggers a thyroid problem (a treatable cause of depression).

Childbirth can also deplete your vitamin stores. Low iron and low vitamin D or low B vitamins can also make you tired/no energy. All can be checked with a simple blood test (TSH, vit D., CBC/ferritin, homocysteine).

Good luck, I hope you feel better soon.

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J.M.

answers from Kansas City on

My dr told me that post partum depression (PPD) does not usually set in for about 6-8 weeks... that the first 6-8 weeks can just be hard to adjust to... lack of sleep, new routine, being 100% selfless with a new child... especially for new parents! Call your dr if you are concerned. Are you taking enough vitamins?? Your hormones might be all out of whack too... Hang in there and know that this too shall pass. Ask your husband to keep an eye on you and maybe call Dr just to check in. You JUST had a baby... keep that in mind... your baby is less than 2 weeks old. What you are experiencing is VERY normal. I have 3 kids and I was in a bit of a daze for a while with each one :)

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A.L.

answers from Washington DC on

I got the same way, and at the same time of day. For me, by that time of day I was already really tired and I knew a long night of feedings/wakings was ahead of me. Plus, I had been home all day by myself with the baby and the dog. By evening I really needed to get out and talk to other people a bit.

What worked for me was definitely napping when the baby did, getting out by myself for a bit when I could (even if I just ran to the grocery store for bread) -- that helped me feel like a normal person.

If you are breastfeeding, maybe your husband or someone else can take the night shift for you and give the baby a bottle so you can get some sleep.

Things definitely get better, and it won't be long. I had a c-section too, and I noticed that I felt better each week. I definitely felt that the nighttime blues went away after a month or so.

Some of the best advice I got was this: "It is ok to wish for your old life back. It doesn't make you a bad mother; it doesn't mean you don't love your baby. You are adjusting to your new life and it takes a while." I got that from my BFF and she was right!

Try to get out a bit by yourself in the evening and think about having someone else take the night shift of feedings once a week so you can get some rest.

Hang in there!

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L.L.

answers from New York on

Give yourself some time. You just had the baby. Just relax. It's okay to feel sad, exhausted, happy one minute, sad the next, frustrated, or even angry at certain points of the day. Your body is still adjusting to the birth. Take friends up on their offers when they say "If there's anything I can do to help!!" Say "Why YES! Hold the baby please while I take a shower or get out for some fresh air."

I am sure you're totally fine. Just snuggle with your little one as much as possible. My kids are growing like weeds before my very eyes and my heart aches for when they were newborns. So bittersweet.

Good luck and take care of yourself, (oh and congrats!!)
Lynsey

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M.D.

answers from Minneapolis on

I was on strict bed rest for 21 days and for 5 days after I delivered my twins, it took all my energy just to get out of bed everyday. Being a new mom does take some time to get used to, your life is totally different than what it was a year ago. Kudos to you for getting all dressed and makeup done, I stay at home and if I get blue jeans on, a long sleeve shirt its a good day!! (my twins are now 5 and my son who has special needs is 11 and he is a handful!!).

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N.R.

answers from St. Louis on

You are just having a bit of ppd and you will be ok. Get rest when you can, start exercising as soon as your doctor gives you permission. I know exactly how you feel and this will go away. If it becomes too bad do not hesitate to call you dr. and get on meds. This is all caused from the hormone imbalance in the body. Also, stay off sugar and caffeine during this time. Having a baby is life changing and it is always a 6 month adjustment period for the entire family every time a new baby is brought home. Try to relax, ask for help and bring in your support system. I wish you well.

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Y.Y.

answers from New York on

post partum depression should only range from 24-72 hours... anything beyond that is not normal... try to focus on your baby first before your puppy.. your dog needs love and attention as well but trust their animal instinct.. they will eat if they are hungry and they will do what they need to do...

during the first 3 days of after we were discharged from the hospital.. i was crying and up all night... i was staring at my DD... i was thinking about her future.. what i could and i could not give her... it went away after a while, after i got used to our routine...

make a schedule.. when to feed the baby,, when to bathe, when to sponge bath, when to change diapers, when to put him to sleep, when you can get your nap and shower... babies body clock depends on the time or routine you make... cheer up.. things will be alright...

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F.V.

answers from Columbia on

Honey! Just know that "this too shall pass". I had twin girls march of 2009. I was in new york and all of our family was in south Carolina. I cried every day for the first 5 weeks. I would call my mom crying. She would get me calm. Then i would call my mother in law and cry. I just wondered who in the world thought I could do this. One thing i always tried to do was get outside whether it was to take my girls for a 10 minute stroll or go get the mail fresh air always helps. It is normal for you to feel this way. Cry all day every day if you have to. I also had 3 cats and one of which was very sick. I also felt guilty cause they were my only children for so long. But you have different priorities now. It will get better. Inlist a friend or family member so you still have some adult conversations and good luck. This is the hardest job in the world. :)

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K.H.

answers from Washington DC on

Everyone has a touch of the baby blues , it is very common & does not mean it will lead to or you have post partum depression. Being a new mom takes some time to adjust to , but getting out for a little during the day like you are doing will help. Try not to worry about what you have not managed to do , you have a newborn and a puppy to look after , and focus more on what you have managed to do....you showered for one thing and put some makeup on which is more than some people can manage in the early weeks. You and the baby are both new to this and it does take a little bit of time to get a rhythm going and some kind of routine (in my experience at least 6 weeks before baby was on a regular eating pattern).

Don't beat yourself up , it sounds like you are doing great , enjoy the baby while he is a newborn as it will be gone before you know it , and when he sleeps try and rest yourself.

Congratulations

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