Potty Training 2 1/2 Year Old - Roseville,CA

Read the book, "Toilet Training in Less than a Day". It really requires 2 full days (no laundry, TV, or other distractions - just potty training all day). By the end of the 1 or 2 days, it will be done. You will need a potty doll (the kind that pees when you give it a bottle, candies (like M&Ms) and cloth training pants. It's a very positive experience. The child teaches the doll how to use the potty first. My mom used it to teach my sister and me, then I used it to teach my son. It's great!

Very common for child to do great in one place but not in another. The day care is very structured i'm sure as most are and they do potty breaks at certain times where K. go whether they "need" to or not then K. can go as they ask during other times. i would get with the day care & find out basically when those times are and duplicate. Once you have home on same schedule it should be easier for him to adjust. You know he has the capabilities, you just have to get him to want what you do as much as you do. i did this by telling mine, here is how it is. no more diapers, or pull ups. big K. & grown ups use the potty & you are not a baby anymore. no bottles, paci's, & no more diapers. I then would then withhold whatever it is that he really enjoys (his currency) and let him know that when he chooses to use the potty like you know he can, then he will earn his currency. So when he asks for currency you ask did you use the potty today? he will get the point. You have to withhold the currency though & not give in regardless of any fits. Aso after a week no cooperation, then withhold another currency item... essentialy all things not necessary to his health. My daughter's currency was chocolate milk. She could have milk, just not chocolate. My son's currency was tv time. I use this method for all transitions. When K. decide they don't want to clean up their rooms......K. decided they didn't want to bathe themselves, brush teeth etc.... Cooperation = currency. Such is life.

Hello JS, I am a Nanny to days a week for a set of 2 1/2 y/o boys. They suddenly are ready and I have see that their parents have little hot weel cars for them when they really go pee in the toliet-- one has already if he just goes a tiny bit the fols get excited but with me he has to really go before they earn the cars. I don't think they are ready to go poop in the toliet yet but we are happy with this achievement. I am the mother of 5 and have had a Day Care for many yers and believe that if it takes a bribe then do it-- it won't last forever and doesn't hurt.
Good Luck

It sounds as though you are feeling pressure because he uses potty at daycare and not at home. Eventually he will do it at home. Don't let pressure- feeling that others will judge you- push you to push him. Candies are never a good idea for behavior reward. It is not a good strategy for so many reasons. It is bad for his teeth, affects relationship with food, etc. Just hang in there. When you least suspect it (and he thinks it is his idea) he will start to use potty at home. He is still very young.

If he's staying dry at daycare he should be fine at home too. I would find out what song they sing to him at daycare and use the same strategy they did. Does he stay dry with a diaper on at daycare, or a pull up? You might also use this summer time opportunity to simply let him run around naked and just watch when he shows signs of needing to go and get him to the potty. then work your way to underpants. Does he have a favorite character that can be found on boys underware? He might like that as a reward for going potty.

At home and with mommy is a different situation, your son is pushing the limits with you and his ability to control his body. I say give him the m&m's or stickers. We tried a potty chart at our home with a sticker for each try without a fight and then moved on to 1 sticker for each success, then 1 for pooping b/c that was harder for my son, and now 1 sticker when we have a good full day of using the potty without any fights. He gets a prize usually a hot wheels cars when he gets 5-10 stickers on his chart, it works well for us, so Don't give up, be firm and patient, keep him in underwear and let him make the choice to use the potty, he will not want to be wet or dirty for too long. Let him know it his choice
good luck, he'll be potty trained soon

How about a visit to a scrapbooking store? He can pick out some cool pieces of paper and a bunch of fancy stickers... but only gets to use them one at a time on his "artwork" after using the toilet at home. He gets positive results all around... achievement, stickers and 1:1 time with you collaborating!

My daughter was very similar when she potty trained at about the same age. I read once that the 1/2 bdays is when K. tend to act out and throw potty training on top of that it was hard in a way.
My friend told me that part of the reason they get like this is because they have no control over anything now, you took the one thing they could do when they wanted away from them. We offered choices for everything potty related. Do you want to walk or skip? Do you want 1 square or 2 squares of tp? (probably won't work for you) Do you want to use the little potty or the big potty? Do you want mommy to take you or daddy to take you? Etc. That really helped a lot.
I also went down to a party supply store and bought $20 worth of junk as rewards and put it in a little "princess" bag and when she went in the potty we sang a song and she got to take something out of the bag. This worked well too, she got 1 thing for going number 1 and 2 for number 2. I realized a few days in that the joy of these toys were short lived so I could have gotten away with buying about $10 worth and put them back in the bag every night.
I hope this helps and best of luck,
C.

Three thoughts:

1. Have you asked him what special reward or celebration he would like for using the potty at home? He may have a much better idea than M&M's, and I agree that bribery is not a good precedent for getting his cooperation. You could make a suggestion or two and see how he responds. Perhaps try "We can send (day care teacher) a letter telling her you know how to use the potty at home!" Or, "Do you want us to sing your special song at home, too?"

2. When we're tempted to describe a child as strong willed, or our interactions as a fight, or any such antagonistic language, it's a good idea to look at our own ideas and attitudes. It's often true that we are providing the object of his resistance, which might well be our own strong-willed ideas, or the way we set up our expectations. My grandson, at 4.5, is still often resistant to going potty until he simply can't hold it any longer. But instead of fighting to get him to go, we either let him decide (and honor him with our trust that he will), or make the experience fun, as in "Hey, G, there's a bathroom full of dinosaurs, and they said you can't come in. What are we gonna do about that?" G, of course, wants to get right on it.

3. If you can bring yourself to try this, tell your little guy that you are so happy he's big enough to know when to use the potty. Let him know that it is completely up to him, and you trust him to notice how much easier it is to use the potty than to have to get cleaned up after an accident. He may need to test your word for a few days.

Or he may not be quite ready yet – school plus home is more than twice the commitment. K. often train, then regress, then train again a few weeks or months later, when they are truly prepared to take on this rather large commitment. It's a huge step forward, and it means accepting that they'll use the potty every single time. He will want to do it when he is truly ready. That sometimes happens a little later for boys.

First thing: no fighting over the potty-training! Let it flow (no pun intended) and let him be in charge and it will happen, no stress over it. I had 3 boys and just introduced then encouraged the potty and let nature take it's course. At age 3, they all were ready to make the complete transition, and not one of them fought with me or had accidents. I think parents think it won't happen unless they push, but you need to trust that it will, just maybe on their timetable, not yours.