Potty Training - Crown Point,IN

Updated on January 30, 2008
J.C. asks from Crown Point, IN
19 answers

My daughter is 2 1/2 and we started potty training a while ago and she loved sitting on the potty but now she doesn't do it. I ask her if she has to go potty and she would say no don't want it. I don't know what to do. I've rewarded her in the past for going on the potty and then she just quit. She'll sit on the potty sometimes but she will not go pee or pooh. I've tried giving her stickers for going but she just will not go pee or pooh. Please help. I really need to get her potty trained.

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N.

answers from Chicago on

I went thru this with my daughter, she is gonna be 4 in April and just in the last two weeks has been fully potty trained, you just have to let them do it on their own time, dont push. Although it is very frustrating you still have plenty of time before she starts school and needs it.

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C.N.

answers from Chicago on

My daughter was 3 when i finaly said no more diapers! I put a water resistant matress cover on her bed & yes it was messy for about a week but she did great !oh and there were a few mishaps on the floor too but thats ok she was done & trained in a week & a few days

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G.M.

answers from Indianapolis on

It is quite common for children to show an interest initially in the potty chair. The rate of maturing and for everything to work together, the physical ability to control, the interest, the desire to take the time away from play, etc. differs from child to child. Usually this is not all accomplished before a child is two at the earliest, more commonly three (and often four for boys) When parents say their child is potty-trained early-on, it probably is more that the parent is trained to remind them and or take them...and there still are "accidents" frequently. You all know it will happen eventually! It's the parent's anxiety to have it totally accomplished "now" that causes the hardships...and having greater expectations than the child can perform. The less of an issue that is made over pottying, the better it is for all! Providing for physical needs, showing understanding, giving soft encouragement, and support is the best way for the child to develop the desire to remember on his own, handle it all and eventually to feel the joy in HIS/HER great accomplishment. Pull-ups are great! Be patient! and give praise generously each step of the way. Children truly want to please you and see their parents happy. Something as natural and routine as pottying deserves your patience and love. The child is learning so much from you...respect for their body and how it works....and that you love them no matter what happens.

I am a mother of eight children, grandmother of 30, great grandmother of two.

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L.R.

answers from Chicago on

What do you mean, YOU need her to be potty trained? It's her body. In my experience it's a mistake to make a huge issue of this, because it's something they can control and if you try to control them and end up getting angry, it could get out of control. A lot of children are abused over this issue. They get trained when they're ready and it is a hugely individual process, often involving physical maturity, not just their own desire or yours for training to occur. Nothing, absolutely nothing, works every time with every child. There is no magic time at which they can or should be trained, assuming they are mentally and physically healthy.

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M.S.

answers from Chicago on

Are you using pull ups to train her or are you using under wear? If you are using pull ups, stop, and start using underwear. you will have accidents, but she will not feel very confortable when she is wet or poop, and eventually start to tell you she has to go. Also, start asking her if she wants to go to the potty on a regular basis (every half hour to 45 mins) and just sit her down on the potty even though she tells you she does not want too. Take her to the potty and sit her down, also you sit down with her and she will see that you too use the potty. Be consistant and very patient. She will get it. Good luck!

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A.M.

answers from Elkhart on

I had really good luck training my 2.5 year old boy. I think one of the reasons we had such good luck is because we just went with training pants (meaning the cotton ones that are a little thicker in the middle) or naked from the waist down. Within a week he was totally day trained. Before I went cold turkey, I used pull ups for a little while. He just felt like he was wearing diapers, so he had no need to use the potty. When I get ready to train my daughter in a few months I plan to use the same method. Just deal with the accidents and hope she gets the hang of it quickly.

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J.P.

answers from Evansville on

My granddaughter would use her potty when she wanted to. But she loved princess Barbie, so we bought her barbie panties & told her she could wear them but she couldnt pee or poop in them; so she went to potty from then on problem solved

J. P

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A.A.

answers from Chicago on

J.,

I also have a little girl who is coming up on 2 1/2. I have been working on potty training with her for over almost 2 months now. She also was happy to do it at first and had it figured out great and then suddenly refused to go anymore. I was very frusterated because I knew she was capable of doing it yet every time I asked her if she wanted to go she would say "no potty!" and get upset. She tends to have a stubborn personality and I think this was a way to exert her independence. She could see this was important to me (even though I was trying to make it fun) and I think the pressure was too much for her. Many people advised me to just put her back in diapers and wait for when she was ready. It only took her two days to decide she didn't like the diapers and she initiated going on the potty again. That lasted for over a week and then again she had a couple days she didn't want to do it. I just put her back in diapers. Now she has been back at it for almost two weeks and is doing great! If your little girl is like mine I would suggest just backing off. Maybe use a little reverse psychology too. Sometimes when I'd ask Lydia is she wanted to go and she said no I would say that is fine, don't go. Sometimes she would then decide she did want to go. Like many have written already, I also am not a fan of pull ups. Underwear can be a little more messy but they were much more effective for my daughter. She hates being wet and won't have an accident in underwear unless she is very distracted and too busy with something (friends over, etc.). Don't know if this helps but know that there are others out there who are also having to spend a while on potty training! Just remember she will get it figured out soon!

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L.V.

answers from Chicago on

Everyone that I've talked to about this says not to push them, they'll go when they are ready. I am still working on my just turned 3 year old twins and they are starting to get it, but it's on their terms. She is still young to be potty trained, keep trying and eventually she will get there. Good Luck!

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S.A.

answers from Chicago on

I know many mommy's are going to have a fit about this one, but my mom didn't give us a choice. And neither do I. I started both girls at 2 but they didn't understand how to recognize the urge...so at 2 1/2 they figured it out and then I didn't give them a choice. I sat them on the potty at regular intervals regardless...it didn't take long before they told me when they needed to go...and I mean within a few days. They sometimes cried or whined a bit when I put them on and would tell me they didn't need to go, but they went 9 times out of 10. One is five now and the other is 3...both are very happy, well adjusted little girls and have no problem going potty by themselves. They both were very happy to go very quickly and considered themselves bit girls.

I did use treats for a bit too...a chocolate chip if they actually went on the potty...no chip if they didn't go. Did it tear at my heart when they cried a little...yes. But I'm the mommy and I knew they needed to go. I would just stroke their face and tell them that it was okay and they didn't need to cry...and when they went I clapped and cheared and made a big deal out of it.

I'm potty training a 20 month old I babysit now. She really liked to sit on the potty so I figured I would try for a week and see what happened. We started by spending the whole morning naked in the bathroom..(I have a big bath...but a kitchen does fine too...it is easier to clean the floor) I had the potty chair out in the middle of the room and I had a couple sippy cups of watered down juice. We played all morning and every time I saw her start to dribble, I put her on the potty real quick. It took about three days for her to get it. Then I let her fun around with those little thick, cloth training panties. She wet the floor a few times, but it was only a week before she finally realized that she could make herself go on the potty. Now I put her on the potty about once an hour...maybe I little longer if she hasn't been drinking from her cup. She will go potty for me everytime. It has been two weeks and she has even gone poop twice on the potty and will tell me on occasion when she needs to go...I just has to take break and run her to the potty because she came to me and said, "potty, potty". I took her and she went pee pee. Now I still sit her at regular intervals because she will get to playing and forget. She doing a good job and will cheer for herself when she goes....

I was potty trained at 18 months, as was my sister-in-law, her brother and the grandma of the little one I babysit for said she had her daughter potty trained at 18 months too.

It doesn't traumatize them. You just have to watch for maturity. After a few days or so do they recognize the urge? Do they get upset when they have an accident (I do make a big deal when they have accidents...by saying no, no Annabelle. Pee Pee goes in the potty..I make a stern face.) After a week or so can she go on the potty and make herself go? If you see these signs in your daughter, then she is capable of going. It is a matter of constantly reminding her that she's a big girl and going pee pee in a diaper is not acceptable. And make her sit on the potty at regular intervals. When she gets the hang of it she will be sooooo proud of herself.

PS Do not use pull ups. They are just diapers you can pull on and off. You put those on her and she will never figure it out. A little pee running down her legs is the only thing that will help her figure out the urge. I've seen kids in pull ups for two years and not figure it out. I've seen a child that was potty trained in a few weeks with pullups. I can name countless children that were potty trained before 2 and 3 with regular cloth training pants. They have to feel it to get it.

Good luck!!!!

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L.

answers from Chicago on

My son went through the same thing. We started potty training at about the same age and he was doing great at first. The daycare that he went to had a lot of boys and they were all going so we figured my son would also want to. Like I said, at first, it was great but he suddenly decided one day that he didn't want to. The more you pushed, the more they will fight it. I pushed for a while until I figured he'll go when he's ready. At about 3 years old he took an interest in it again and was potty trained within a month! Once they're ready it moves quite quickly. Have patients and she'll come to you.

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L.K.

answers from Chicago on

The best thing you can do if she is now refusing to use the potty is stop and DON'T PUSH her. It will back fire on you and it will end up taking longer. Why do you "really need to get her potty trained"? She still is young. Stop talking about it and let her decide again when she is ready. Then when she is she will let you know. Then also use your reward system. I have two boys who are now almost 7 and 4 years old. That was the approach I used with them and it seemed to work for them. If she starts preschool in the fall 2008 than give her until end of Spring without mentioning it than talk about school and that whe will have to be able to go by herself like a big girl in school. School might be motivation enough. Also, don't use pull-ups. Use underwear, yes it will get messy and frustrating, but the kids have to feel it for themselves. Pull-ups are just like diapers. What you are going through right now is so normal and happens all the time. Everything will be alright. Hang in there.

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B.C.

answers from Indianapolis on

My daughter will turn 3 in a few weeks & just within the last month has really decided it was time! What a happy new year it has been for me, because I really started pushing at 2 1/2! I would ask if she needed to potty & she would shout NO! and run away (you can understand how frustrated I was getting, I am sure!) Friends told me to let it go, she will do it when SHE is ready. One day, I asked if she wanted to make a potty chart & she said YES! So, I taped a chart with squares in the bathroom & everytime she would even SIT on it, I would give her a little smiley face sticker. When she peed, we would get a larger sticker. Number 2 has taken an extra 2 weeks, but she got a BIG sticker when that finally came! It is true what they say, they will do it when they are ready. Good luck!

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J.N.

answers from Chicago on

Dear J., my son was the same until he started going to day care and seeing other children using the potty. Peer pressure always works a treat... it sounds weird but it works. Do you have a friend with a child of similar age who likes to use the potty. Sometimes that's all the encouragement they need. You could just happen to visit one day and let your daughter see them going nicely to the potty and, hopefully, bingo!!

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N.M.

answers from Chicago on

We had similar issues. I used a web book. Just search under potty training and a number of trained in 3 days options come up. We had a lot of success with this. We were dry at night from the start by not giving her beverages for 1-2 hours before bed. Ditch all diapers and pull ups and go straight to panties. She won't want to mess them up after the 1st time or two. Warning though, you will be steam cleaning the carpets, but it is well worth it by saving big bucks on diapers. Good luck!

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N.C.

answers from South Bend on

My daughter is 15 months and uses the potty on a regular basis. She will sometimes have an accident but i would much rather have an occasional accident than change diapers all day long. I found that the Pull ups "cool alert" work really well. At the beginning she would shiver when she would have an accident then then grab the pullup. I have also heard of putting "big girl" underwear on them and letting them pee down their leg. Most children hate this feeling and it will help them to understand the need to pee pee in the potty. At the beginning i would set her on the potty every 20 minutes. We would read books, sing and just spend time together. Addison is also very motivated by M&M's so she gets one M&M when she goes potty. She has started shaking the jar of M&M's at me and saying mmmmm when she needs to go potty. The number one thing is to be consistant, remind them to go on a regular basis and praise them like crazy.

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S.B.

answers from Indianapolis on

My doctor told me one time that this is one of the first things that they have absolute control over and some go through this phase simply because they can. Be patient, she will get with the program.

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S.

answers from Chicago on

Hang in there..When she is ready she will go.My son is 3.5 and I had just about given up hope. But two weeks ago he came down the stairs with underwear on and diapers in his hand. He said "mom, I don't need these anymore I am going to practice on being a big boy my little brother can have these diapers. " He has not had an accident in two weeks. So just be patient, as hard as it is, she will when she is ready!

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A.W.

answers from Chicago on

What worked with my daughter was everytime she would look like she had to go my husband or myself would rush her to the bathroom and praise her the whole time(you are such a big girl, mommy and daddy are so proud of you) you really have to make a huge fuss about it so she sees how exciting it is this seemed to really work. Also I had bought bath crayons and taped paper up on the wall and on the tub next to her potty and would let her color as she used the potty. We would also make up silly potty songs and she loved the book "Once Upon a Potty" for girls. I hope this was somwhat useful for you and good luck.

A. W. mother of great little girl who will be 3 on Friday.

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