Potty Training - Burney,CA

I thought I would respond since no one else suggested this. My son hated the little potties we had gotten him. I bought one of the seats that fits on the regular toilet. Now he is more than happy to use the potty. It might be worth a try.

Pull-ups are useless.

What I like is the Gerber Training Pants, or Potty Scotty underwear.
Both are padded in the middle, all cotton.
You can find it on Amazon, or the Gerber can be found at Walmart in 3 packs.

If she is ready. You can do that. She does not seem ready. Or you have her go naked. Bottomless.
You've been trying for over a year... with no progress and you tried everything.
My son.... he is 3.5 years old, just recently ON HIS OWN, started to want to pee in the potty. We use a potty chair. The Baby Bjorn one. He will go on that, but not on a regular toilet yet. He is not 100% competent at pottying yet.... but he does so, willingly, on his own. Happily. Not every single time... but much better than forcing him. Forcing him does not work, nor for most kids. Rewards and/or punishments also doe not work.

Also, it depends on their bladder and nerve development. If not matured yet, they simply do not have the bladder-brain connection to "know" prior to actually peeing, that they need to go and they can't hold it long enough to get to the potty.

Try a potty chair. Put it out wherever she is, so it is easily accessible, and right near by.

She may also just have anxiety about the whole thing. Which some kids do. Common.

Readiness, is the key, If not ready, the child won't.

all the best,
Susan

Hang in there . . . . . have you tried a reward system? I am not one for giving candy to my children, but it can work. Every time your child uses the potty, make a big deal out of it. Do a "potty dance" if you have to. Make it fun for her. Then as a reward, give her 4 or 5 M&M's as a special treat. Good luck!!!

Hi K.! These are links to 2 recent potty questions that I think have some great responses. I wrote on both that we swear by the Duke University "It's Potty Time" Super Duper Potty Pooper video and there are links to see what it is and where you can get it....some libraries might even have it....anyway, I understand your frustration and have been there maaaannny times but you will get through it and the Mom who wrote about the "being ready" and "brain/bottom" nervous system connection is spot on......she'll get there when she's ready....sounds like there are probably a few "issues" going on right now so taking a break as much as possible might be just what she needs to take control and decide she WANTS to potty......

http://www.mamapedia.com/questions/9431790087290552321

http://www.mamapedia.com/questions/15809695455262081025

Take the pull-up off and let her feel what it's like to really potty in her pants! You can't expect a child to not go potty in a pull-up when a pull-up is exactly like a diaper, just gets put on differently. Kids are not stupid - they have been taught to potty in a diaper which is exactly what your daughter is doing - pottying in a diaper. Put her in panties and get ready to wash!

Hang in there! My three year ten month old just took a leap in potty training progress. It was hard as society tells you all these methods & you try all of them, but sometimes the kid just isn't ready. I knew all the methods. This was my fourth child & I work with families with kids. It just didn't work until she was ready. She knew the concepts for a long time before she was ready to apply them consistently. I still have to watch & make sure she takes breaks from play, otherwise she will just keep playing wet or poopy, it doesn't matter. She is cooperative most of the time, now though- we are finally at about 85%- yeah! You'll get there. Just wanted you to know that there are other moms out there with similar experience.

We put a small bulletin board up in the bathroom and let our three year old stock it with sticker packets. She got to pick a sticker to put in a special spot every time she went pee successfully. For #2, we would double the number of stickers she could get, or if it wasn't going to mess up a meal-time, she got a gummy worm.
Now she's 4 years old and we're working to avoid public bathrooms with the auto-flush feature. Ha! Whoever invented that needs a good, swift kick.

take away the pull ups, they are pretty much diapers, put her in training underwear, which is thicker underwear, Gerber makes them. this will make the potty HER best choice. She will have many accidents at first but just try to change her and remind her to use the potty next time, and let her use the big toilet, my son liked it better too. We also used a reward system of 1 m&m for pee and 2 for poop, and the moved on to a potty chart where he got a sticker for each success ad the got a special prize when he filled a row with stickers. Remember you cannot make her go to the toilet, you want it to be her choice, so she stops this control struggle with you, just take away most other options so that using the potty is her best option.
good luck, she will get soon

I have the same problem with two little guys in my daycare. What I do is simply put them on the potty ... our guys like using the big toilet with a potty training insert seat... and tell them they need to try to go. Someone said this is a 3 year old power struggle and I agree with that. Once they find out they aren't going to win that particular power struggle, they usually calm down and are happy... and even use the potty most of the time. The key is to just be calm about it as you take them into the bathroom and set them on the potty or toilet. And do give her choices in other things whenever you can.
One other thing our guys like is that we keep their clean diapers/pullups in drawers in the bathroom and when they've finished on the toilet they get to go and get out their own diaper. It's such a simple thing, but makes them feel like they are big helpers. Each has his own drawer and has the responsibility of getting out the diaper and remembering to close the drawer. One of them also has both diapers and pull-ups in his drawer so gets to choose which he'd prefer to wear.

Hi K.,

Give me at 2 year old any day! because those 3 year olds have minds of thier own.

I've worked with kids for 16+ years, and I've potty trained quite a few. It sounds to me like this is an example of a 3 year old power struggle. She needs (actually developmental need), to be in control. Since 3 year olds have little control in most areas, they tend to fight with potty training, giving them control.

I suggest allowing her control in areas of her life. It could be what she wears, what she eats, (within reason), or what color her room is.

You could give her a goal. If she uses the potty like a big girl she can paint her room a new color or choose a new bed set.

I hope this works for you.

R. Magby

Sometimes the pull-ups work against you. Because they're so good at soaking up moisture, the child doesn't feel that they have peed and it's not uncomfortable. If you tried training underwear (with a thicker soaker in the middle) your daughter would feel that she's wet and not like it very much. Then she might be more motivated to go in the potty. It's going to be more laundry for you, but it might work! You can talk about keeping her underwear dry and make peeing in the potty the coolest.thing.ever. Pick something she loves to play with, watch, or eat/drink, and don't let her have it -unless- she goes pee on the potty. Not letting her have it at other times will make her want it even more, giving her more motivation to "pee pee in the potty! potty potty potty!"

good luck!