I have a 2 1/2 year old who is *mostly* potty trained. This winter we kept him pantless in the house and he went to the potty all the time, on his own, very few accidents. By March he had several days of no accidents, so we began to branch out into putting underwear/pants on when we left the house. He does not seem to notice the difference between underwear and a diaper, he will go in it and not even try to get to potty/pull down pants. Fast forward to April/May and the weather is warming up so we are outside all the time. We can't keep him pantless outside, but he refuses to come inside to use the potty. Instead he has been peeing/pooping in the underwear/pants/shoes so often now we've gone back to diapers. When we're inside we take the diaper off, but it seems like we're only inside for an hour or less, then the kids are begging to play outside again. I need help to be able to get over this, or we're going to have a very long, frustrating summer! Thanks!
Thanks so much for the advice. Even though I have an older son who potty trained from 2 1/2 to 3 1/2 (he regressed after baby brother was born) I still learned alot of good ideas. I honestly never thought about taking the chair outside-probably because I've caught the boys peeing in the garden too many times LOL! I know he's ready because he wants to do EVERYTHING his older brother does and he did fine all winter. I'll try the timer method again, this time outside with pants on but no underwear. Pull-ups and training pants have not worked for either of my kids-they are basically just more expensive diapers, and I only use them while shopping or in the car on a long trip. But I could see how underwear might feel like a diaper so I'll try without. Thanks for the tips!
Are you in the backyard? If so, put the potty chair outside.
Neither of my boys were fully trained until after they were 3.
Most of my kids haven't been fully potty trained until they were 4, so you can feel free to completely ignore my advice if that horrifies you. ;-)
Don't. Torture. Yourself.
Put potty training away for a bit, and try again in a few weeks. Most of the time, it's just not going to happen until they want it to happen.
We've been through all of the tips and tricks with our oldest four kids. My most recent trainer has been one of the most difficult. He just turned 4 on the 1st of the month.
On Sunday, he suddenly decided he wanted to be done. He's been clean and dry every day since, and clean and dry overnight for the past two nights. No bribes/incentives/charts/punishments, just the lightbulb turning on in his head.
Based on experience with my other kids, I'm confident he's done with pull ups and accidents.
Good for you for potty training early! My son has a similar problem now that it is warm outside and he loves to play. The worst is in the sandbox, he always seems to pee in there. To help with this we've created a routine where he has to go before we go outside to play. Then I take the potty out with us and that way it's right there and we don't have to go inside.The other thing is to ask him if he has to go every so often. I don't push if he says no. If he has to go he either says yes (rarely) or ignores me and then I go over to him, say "We will come right back and play, but first we need to use the potty. All of your toys will be right here waiting for you when we are done." Sometimes he wants to bring a shovel or something with him, so I let him bring it along. If we have a few accidents I tell him that since he didn't tell me we'll have to just sit and try every so often (30 minutes or so) until he tells me when he has to go. By sit and try I mean for like 5 seconds. If he has to go he'll go as soon as I sit him down, the hurdle is getting him to go sit down. I never make him sit until he goes, that just turns into a power struggle that frustrates both of us.
Someone once told me that potty trained naked is not potty trained, so you need to get him to tell you he has to go when he is wearing pants. We skipped underwear for the first month or two of potty training and just put on pants that were really easy up and down. Underwear can feel a bit like a diaper, so leaving it out helps them remember they need to get to the potty to go. Plus imagine how it feels if you go in your pants without underwear, gross.
Good luck! You know he can do it because he's been doing it all winter, so don't go back to the diapers. The older they get the more of a power struggle you're likely to face.
I would say that he has regressed and to just cut it off completely and go straight to diapers. Try again in a month or so or wait until he brings it up. You can make a big deal about him needed diapers again to see if that helps, but sometimes toddlers are just trying to asert their independence and don't want to.
You are making yourself crazy and so I would say back off ufor a bit!
I haven't read all the mom's responses, but I'm guessing someone said the same thing as me: He's not ready.
We have been thru all the same stuff with our son and he's almost 3/ 1/2 now. Only in the last month maybe have I noticed what I think is him being ready. He's been sick too so I'm waiting a few more weeks before we dive in again, but I think we may be more successful now.
And keep in mind-it's nice outside, he's 2 1/2, and peeing is a bother...why go inside and stop what he's doing when he can pee himself so conveniently? That's what he's thinking. :)
Basically-just because they can hold it doesn't mean they are emotionally ready-I would recommend shelving it for awhile and saving yourself the stress.
I think you're on the right track except the constant switching from underwear to nothing to diapers is probably very confusing to your son. We used the method at www.3daypottytraining.com for our daughter two months shy of her 3rd birthday and she was mostly potty trained in three days and completely (day and night) within two weeks. It is a no diapers, pull ups, training pants method based on a reward system (we used animal crackers for pee and m&ms for poop). Plus I bought really cool dollar spot puzzles for the end of each day no matter how many accidents she had. Put him back in diapers for a few weeks, get the e-book, and start fresh and I think you will have a lot more success. Good luck!
C.
I was a professional nanny for twenty years and I have a 3 1/2 year old son. I think parents put WAY too much pressure on the potty training, yes we all want are kids to the the first not the last in the group to be potty trained. I don't think it is worth pushing a child, I say let you son decide, his body needs to be ready, something you can not push. Who cares if he is not potty trained until the end of the summer or only potty trained during the day and night time trained until six. The bigger deal parents make of potty training the worse it usually is. I say let your child wear diapers, make a sticker chart and if he keeps it dry he gets a sticker, if he uses the bathroom he gets a sticker...then if you want another reward then add that, x amount of stickers you get a big sticker, a m & m, a matchbox car, whatever. Potty training is hard, harder then most of the things you need to teach kids...I have HAD to potty trianing because they are going to school and spent a week at home doing nothing but potty training a 3 1/2 year old. Just remember the reward should be for dry pants/diaper/pull-up. If I were you I would say everyone needs to try to use the potty before going outside then actually time the potty breaks, if you go outside at 9 at 10-10:30 take a potty break. Good luck!
My daughter was potty trained with pooping at 18 months but did not get the pee part until she was 4 yrs old. When she turned 4, we switched to only diapers at night. Even then, she would have accidents 0-5 times a day. Even now, at almost 4.5 yrs, she has accidents in the day time, maybe 1-3 times a week. I still have to bring a change of clothes or 2 (don't forget to pack socks too!)everywhere. And urgh, those shoes get so disgusting!
Nobody told me it was going to take so long to potty train a child. It is long and frustrating.
Lots of people gave me advice. I even went to the doctor to make sure there wasn't anything wrong with her. The doc said just to give it time. I really think kids are being pushed to being potty trained too early these days and nobody is really saying what being fully potty trained really is. Every kid deals with it differently. I wonder if some parents don't know how the potty training really is going because most of their accidents were in the day in daycare/preschool.
Hang in there. This period will soon pass.
I understand your frustration. My 3.5 year old is STILL working on potty training. Sometimes she does great, and sometimes she refuses. We have a deck that is surrounded by tall bushes, so when the kids are playing in the yard I bring the potty chair outside and she will use it. They get so wrapped up in playing that they don't want to take a "potty break". Maybe you can motivate him by telling him if he goes in the potty instead of his pants, you can stay outside LONGER, but if his pants get wet, you have to go inside? Good luck... I think potty training is one of the most challenging tasks of parenting!
