Potty Training Regression - Chisago City,MN

My advice is to ignore it completely.
We have had this with both of my kids. The more you acknowledge it, the more they react to it. It's a way of asserting themselves and testing the independence waters.
When mine did this, I would ask them to go get clean pants and put the dirty ones in the wash pile. That's all the reaction they got. It stopped after about a week.

It will stop again, just leave everything alone.

Yes, you did have a big change. You have a new baby in the house. It is very common and normal for potty trained kids to regress a bit when they're adapting to having a new baby. It is a way for them to get Mommy's attention, since the new baby is taking so much of it. Just keep at it--go back to what worked when he was first trained.

ETA: Even though he was trained after she was born, it's still an adjustment to him. Our Peds have always told me that I shouldn't begin anything new with my kids around the time of the birth of their siblings, especially potty training, since they'll usually regress if the events coincide.

V.,

He has a baby sister now. That's a HUGE change. He's NOT getting the attention he once got from you. He now realizes his baby sister is permanent and not just a new, shiny toy.

Ignore his behavior. If he wants to sit in wet pants? "Oliver, please put a towel under you" and not make a deal out of it. Or just simply tell him "Oliver, go change your pants"....DO NOT put him in time out. DO NOT give him overt attention. Stay matter of fact and press on.

Good luck!

Never put a diaper on him, too confusing. Better to put something on the bed in case of accidents.

Kids do this. No one tells you about it. It just happens. Just ignore it, remind him he's a big boy, and try not to make a big deal about it.

He could have a cold or something.

No punishment. Just have him clean up his mess, and remind him about the health safety of using a toilet for pee and poop.

My first two kids had major regressions before basically becoming fully trained. With that said, my son had an accident on Easter-first one in 8 months. My oldest had an accident on her fifth day- she was totally trained, including night, at 21 months. It happens. Just ignore it, remind, and hang in there, it will pass.

My son did this when he didn't want to stop playing. So we started toy time out. If he had an accident because he didn't want to take a break from a toy...the toy went away for the rest of the day. It only took a few times of losing Bob the Builder for him to learn to stop playing for a moment to potty.

I would also take away the "just in case" diapers for trips. I kept a change of clothes in the car or my purse. In the very beginning I kept a dish towel and wipes in my purse because I was terrified of an accident in a cart making a mess everywhere. I only needed it once, but at least I was prepared (there were definitely more than one accident, just no real messes to speak of :) ).

I agree with Julie--get rid of the diapers completely. Also, make him do all of the clean up work--change clothes, rinse pants, clean up floor, etc. If he gets tired of it, maybe he'll think twice about doing it. Good Luck!

This happened with my second youngest. He was 2.5 years old when his baby brother was born. He had two older brothers one was in pre-school and the other was in kindergarten, so he got a lot of my time. About 6 months after his brother was born, he did the total regression, wanting a pacifier and all the other baby stuff.

This is a HUGE change for your son. Four months is a long time for a 3 year old. He probably did not understand that his baby sister was going to be a permanent fixture in the house, most kids don't have that concept yet.

DO NOT put him in diapers. It only confuses him.
DO NOT put him in time out. Punishing him isn't going to help him. He wants your attention. So you need to cut time out of your day and give it to him. I know it's not easy. I have four kids. You will find a way. Your husband needs to step up as well. He needs to take him into the bathroom with him. He needs remind him to go potty. Tyler had to do this with our son.

Hope this helps!
S.

Our son did that. I put him in pullups for a couple of months but continued to take him to the potty. It actually worked for us. After a couple of months his pull-ups were always dry.

You got some great ideas, but some of them are kind of in conflict with one another. I think that goes to show that different kids will respond differently, and there is no one answer.

Potty training stinks because it's so easy to get discouraged and think "He's going to be in diapers when he's 10!"

I think you just have to try to relax and just try something. Give it a few days or maybe a week to see if it works. If not, back off and try something else.

It stinks, but you really will get through it.

Is it warm enough where you live to just have him run around naked from the waist down? That worked with my girls (but then, with girls, if they're naked they'll pee on their own feet, which they tend not to like).

When you see him starting to do his potty dance, make him stop and go to the bathroom.

My son is 10 and I STILL have to make him stop what he's doing and go. With him, it's usually in the middle of a video game or something. It's not all the time, but maybe 1-3 times a week.

So, he's 3 1/2. He's still learning so he's going to go through phases like this. When his brain is concentrating on learning something else, a window opens, and he can lose a skill that he's already learned, a window closes.

He's still really young for completely no accidents. He could also be dehydrated. Let him have all he wants to drink, even at bedtime, because a full bladder feels differently than a half full one.

A lot of kids go though this sort of thing a couple of times even through kindergarten.

Once my son was trained, I kinda let go of reminding him to go. I was not on top of it as much, and that led to more accidents. I still remind him, you just have to stay on top of it I think. Every hour and a half or so, and of course before leaving the house to go anywhere. It really never sank in with my son until he was out of diapers completely. I think naturally we don't get as annoyed if they wet a pull up versus the cloth underwear. I am a teacher in a parents day out program full of 2 and 3 year olds. Not all of them are trained, but half of them are. One little girl who is 3 1/2 refuses to use the potty, but when her mother sent her in underpants instead of a pull up, she used the potty. If she is wearing a diaper she will use that! So that's it, I would just put the little man in underwear all the time, it should sink in...and honestly...as a result of putting him in those, you will in turn remember that he is in them and will be reminding him/taking him to the potty regularly. I don't know how many times I have taken the little ones in my class to the potty, even when they said "No, I don't have to go!" What ends up happening? 75 percent of those unwanted trips to the potty result in them using the potty, so that just tells me that it can be viewed to them as a pain because they have to stop playing for a minute, but it does end up working out in the end :)

Any chance he's going through a growth spurt? One of my kids lost control whenever he grew a lot. After a few weeks, he would get it back under control.

Of course, one big difference is that when my son lost control during a growth spurt, he would get more upset about it than I did. So I knew it really was an accident.

Since you think he just doesn't want to stop playing, I would impose some 'natural consequences' and have him stop playing to help you clean up, and he can't start playing again until all the cleanup is complete. Because if you make a mess with an accident, you have to clean it up, that's part of life (so you are not saying it like it's a punishment, but just hey, you made a mess, now you need to clean it).