SAHM Missing "Work"

T.,

I understand what you are saying. I started going NUTS when I was home with my two kids and then the bad weather of Fall hit. The idea of being couped up, with two little people was more than I could bear.

For me, I decided to go work (very limited) part time at the local YMCA. Just the ability to talk with grown ups! To get out of the house and know that my kids were being taken care of on-site (for free). And to get moving physically, really helped save my sanity.

It wasn't so much about a career for me as feeling isolated. I love my children and can't see anyone else taking care of them (as in day care or nanny). But I also had to come to terms with the fact that I NEED socialization.

I too felt alone even when talking with my other SAHM friends. They seemed content, even fulfilled. I was going crazy sitting at home in sweatpants, feeling fat, isolated and constantly being needed.

So, for me, working even just a couple of hours a week helped me to feel better. It also helped me that my kids could have fun - rock climbing, playing obstacle course games, going to swimming lessons, etc. I felt good, I got to talk with adults, my kids got exercise and learned that I go away and come back. On top of it all, I got a little money in my pocket.

Also, for me, after a few years, I was ready for another baby because I realized that I didn't have to be a STUCK AT HOME MOM.

Good luck!

I went to grad school while home with my two babies. It kept me sane, and when I did return to my field after what on a resume looks like a 4 year hiatus, I was able to say that I earned my Masters in that time while raising my kids. In my field, that was taken as a good thing, since I work in child development and health care. I had to keep up my license during that time as well, which meant continuing education courses, association dues, etc.

If you wish to return to your field, I'd suggest keeping current with the field thru continuing education and conferences; also, do volunteer work in your community; and take advanced courses to give yourself a edge when you return.

I returned to 15-hour weeks in my field when my youngest was 2.5 year; then, 20-hours by 3.5 years. Oh, earlier in my break I did some fun stuff, like sold Discovery Toys (not good), learned to scrapbook (very fun!) and served on a preschool board (wow, lot of work, but cool people and I learned how to fundraise like crazy!)

Good luck!

Know the feeling. I started getting that itch when my son was about 2, then had my daughter. When my was about 4 months old I started volunteering for a professional organization I belonged to when I was working. I was able to work from home - taking care of business during nap time. It was perfect - no guilt about going back to work because I didn't go anywhere! I was able to have adult conversations, become immersed in my profession, keep abreast of current happenings...About a year after I started volunteering, it turned into a paying gig. That was about 4 years ago. I continue to work from home, but now I rush to get everything done while my kids are at school (rather than nap time). Granted, the pay isn't great but it is money. I also think of the convenience of working from home/setting my own schedule as part of my payment.

This is such a personal decision, you cannot compare your situation with your friends or anyone else's. Everyone is different. I currently work part time from home, but it's not even close to what my chosen career was.

The only thing that I can tell you is that as your kids get older, there are a lot more volunteer opportunities in school and your local home and school association for you to pursue. I see many former career woman channel their creativity, organizational and fundraising abilities into volunteer work. It's really been a pleasure working with such ladies.

Would it be possible for you to work part time in your chosen career? That way, you can see if you like it enough to return full time. Plus, you can see how the children deal with part time child care.

I wish you the best of luck in whatever you decide!