Hi ladies, I have 3 kids so I can't believe I am asking this, I should know already right? Well I don't! My first 2 never did this so I guess all of my knowledge only comes from what I already know.
My third child is a boy, so maybe this is more common with boys than girls? I don't know.
He is a sweet, wonderful easy boy. He sleeps well. He is loving and a joy. He has a bad habit of screaming to get his way, screaming when he wants something and screaming when he is upset. I try and give him the word when he screams to get something "oh you want some water? OK here's your water". I try and comfort him if he is screaming in the car when upset and if he is screaming for something he wants but cannot have (another cookie, for example) then I try and distract him. But he does this screaming in restaurants and other places and it can be very disturbing!!
ANyone else have this and overcome it? Any great tips? TIA ladies!
Thanks for the answers so far. Glad to know I'm not alone.
Laurie a. Maybe you didn't get that he's a 16 month old? Your advice surprises me.
Eta: Marsha g. Also - really?? Whisper in his ear about how he sounds. He is not 4...
eta: I am absolutely willing to do age appropriate discipline. Yes he is my baby but no I am not an anything goes type of parent.
My two year old girl does the same thing except its a high pitched girl scream. I don't what to do either. I just hope she grows out of it like my son somewhat did.
From your reaction to your responses I suspect we've got the "he's my baby" thing going on.
Yes, he is only 16 months old, but it's never too early to beging teaching. What you are currently teaching is "if you scream, Mommy will do her best to figure out what's wrong or give you what you want". I have no problem with the putting him in his bed idea.
Have the "this is not acceptable" attitude and follow it up with a short time out or some sort of discipline and he'll straighten up.
M
It's not a boy thing. Every kid has a way to express when they are upset. My son cried. Some kids get aggressive. Yours screams. I think you are doing the right thing by trying to distract him and really do try your best not to give in because it will get worse. When he starts to have real words in a few months, it might get a bit better. Consistency is the key. I personally think the 18-30 month range is the hardest.
I thought I wrote this, lol. My post was "16-month-old screams all the time." His issue turned out to be...nothing. Maybe teeth. We don't know. At least yours screams b/c he wants something. Mine just screams. He sleeps well and is up once each night to nurse. He is generally happier in the day, too.
And I have four, but still am clueless! :)
adding a late answer:
no, it is not a "boy thing"....if anything, this is more of a 3rd/last child thing. :) This type of behavior happens a lot with the youngest child.
Please watch the "1-2-3 Magic" video. This discipline method will teach you how to prevent the screaming, to gain back control of your home, & will lighten your load when it comes to parenting.
& as a secondary comment: I agree with Laurie A. I used the same method with my own children....& still use it with my daycare kids. Almost all of my daycare parents use the same methods at home, too.
When the child screams, attention from you negates any discipline actions you may be trying to implement. The child needs to be immediately removed from the space....either to a time-out spot or his room. When the screaming/crying stops, then the child needs to listen & participate in a discussion as to how to make better choices & to use his words when in need. Instead of trying to guess your child's needs, keep quiet until he calms. Then discuss with him how/when to use his words.
It is his very lack of vocabulary which is driving him beyond endurance. Many children go thru this phase....& it will continue until you help him understand the need to make good choices & try to use his words. :)
He is in a habit of getting, sounds like a lot of attention from you.. each time he screams.
From now on when he screams, tell him to "use his words ". If he does not have the words, pick him up and put him in his room alone. When he stops screaming go back and let him know he can rejoin all of you,
If he cannot handle a meal out in public for a while, cut those back until he can handle it, or be prepared to swoop him up and take him outside or leave..
Some children scream instead of trying their words. It is good IF you can figure out what he wants, but the screaming can be stopped by showing him, be does not get what he wants when he screams. He can point, he can grunt, or he can try to use his words.
Lol. My 3 year old been going threw this phrase. I don't know why and when exactly it started but he does the same thing. His two older sister never acted like this. He gets mad he will scream. He doesn't scream when he wants anything. Maybe its something he's going threw. Sorry i don't have anything for you,but your not alone. ;)
It sounds like this screaming gets him a lot of attention. Why should he learn to point or grunt when he can scream and you will jump up and try to figure out what he wants. Boys are lazy - if they don't have to learn to talk, they won't!
If he can't talk, teach him a sign for the words like water. Don't try to teach it to him when he's screaming. Wait until he stops screaming and then take him to the faucet and teach him the sign for water. Then, next time he screams for water, ignor him until he's standing at the sink signing. It will take a while for him to realize that screaming is not going to work anymore so you have to be willing to stick with it. If you are consistent, he will get it and he will be a happier child for it!
