Seeking Help: What to Do with Pets When Moving Overseas

Updated on February 07, 2010
B.C. asks from Denver, CO
5 answers

My husband was recently offered the job of a lifetime both career and money-wise. The job is in China and after a recent trip there we determined it simply isn't feasible to take our family pets.

We have a 7-year-old 120 pound mutt and a 12-year-old cat. I was a stay-at-home mom for 18 years so these animals are not only my children's best friends but mine as well. Mostly it would be unfair to the animals to move them as 1.) we will be traveling back and forth for weeks, possibly months, at a time 2.) the dog is huge -- probably too big for most airline approved crates and, because of his size, is probably closer to the end of his lifespan than the middle of it 3.) the dog, who is very, very well behaved and is usually on voice command on our daily walks in the great outdoors of Colorado and Montana, would have to be leashed and muzzled for all of his walks in China, 4.) if the air quality bothers me, I can't imagine what it would do to our dog with his big nose, 5.) the cat, an indoor cat for all of his 12 years, would likely have a heart attack being in a crate for the 24 hour trip without the calming reassurance from a voice he knows and 6.) the cat would become over-the-top neurotic if left alone for long stints of time.

We can hire a company to take the animals through Hong Kong, for a price, and thus avoid the mandatory Mainland China quarantine but it also makes the trip that much longer and difficult for them. I can't imagine giving up the animals -- in fact, it seems far easier to divorce my husband that take away my loving and loyal friends! Our children, 20 and 17, are too young and not in a place in their lives to take on the responsibility for the animals but it would slay them to give them up as well.

My husband is foreign born so his family is not that much closer than China. My family is divided into those who love animals and already own them (and wouldn't/couldn't take on two more) and those who won't even pet/touch them when they come to visit. My mother and a couple of friends can't imagine that we'd let pets come in the way of our lives. Needless to say that's not the way I look at it. Just thinking about giving them up nearly sends me into hysteria. Surely, there has to be a reasonable alternative (or two) to giving them up. As my husband would be making more money, we could pay someone to care for them but how traumatic would that be for them? Having taken on my father's 8 year-old-dog when he passed, I truly believe that animals feels sorrow and abandonment. Also, both pets have been accustomed, for the most part, to having someone in the house with them for their entire lives; hiring a service to look in on them twice a day simply isn't in the cards.

The alternative is to not take the job which is tantamount to passing up the career opportunity of a lifetime not to mention the money which would pay for 6 years of college in one year. Help me, please, if you can. Any suggestions or brainstorming would be wonderful.

Just sign me an overly attached pet owner.

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So What Happened?

Thank you to everyone for their words of wisdom and support. In the end, my husband did not accept the full time position overseas. It was a difficult decision -- man, don't ever think money doesn't play a role! Our children, one who will be in a college dorm as a freshman next August and another who is in a shared college apartment, weren't in positions to care for the animals. Thanks to all of your suggestions we pursued and were able to procure animal assistance with a neighbor; the proposed salary for the overseas post would have enabled us to pay a handsome price for someone to take care of our dog. But in the end, we had other considerations namely that we'd be living in China where the air and water are polluted. Also the new job would basically involve a transfer of technology to China when our dear old U.S.A. is in dire need of all the technological help it can use. In that respect is became a moral vs. money decision! Like I said, in the end we opted to stay in the States closer to our children, our pets, the comforts of cleaner air and water and mostly to all of those corny tenets that are represented by the good old RED, WHITE, and BLUE! Thanks for the messages!

More Answers

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M.K.

answers from Houston on

i know its hard - i agonized when i moved here from the uk - i had a dog and 2 cats, my dog was 10 years old, and my cats were 12, so i had the same dillema.

in the end my dog only lived a year, one of the cats 18 months - i still have one of them at age 14.

it cost me $2000 to ship them over and sometimes i wonder if the stress on them was not more than it was worth for such a short time.

i also believe that animals miss us, but they can easily form attachments to other people, they just need a "pack".

you could get a pet sitter to take care of them twice a day, but that would be hard going for a whole year.
the only options really that are feasible to you are getting a family member to take them for you, find a foster home for them or rehome them - which i know would be hard and horrible.

you cant give up a job for your pets, this you already know, but its a hard choice.

2 moms found this helpful
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M.F.

answers from Austin on

I am an animal lover and can really sympathize with you. I think if you found a really great person that you could hire to "adopt" them, their lives would be good. They would miss you but not necessarily feel abandoned and in mourning. You may be able to find such a person by advertising, on Craigslist or the like. But you would have to have the time to really interview and get to know the person. You might think about neighbors, petsitters, kids' friends' parents, etc who you could approach, who aren't total strangers. Since you are able to pay for care, it might be easier than just trying to get them adopted. If your move is not permanent, perhaps it could be with the understanding that you would take the pets back one day. Are you selling your home? It might be possible to hire a house/pet sitter to stay with the pets in your home. My father used a petsitter who stayed at the pets' home, and that was pretty much her full time job -- someone like that would love to have a steady gig. I am dedicated to my cats and have been lucky to be able to leave them with my mother or take them with me when I've done stints overseas. I know what a heartwrenching choice this must be for you!

1 mom found this helpful
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N.P.

answers from Denver on

I love animals too and do feel for you. I think your kids would be the perfect ones to take care of the animals! especially since they are attached to them as well and do not want to give them up. I'm confused as to why you think they are too young. May be a change in your expectation of their responsibility level would solve you agony.

1 mom found this helpful
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R.J.

answers from San Diego on

We traveled all over the world growing up and always took our pets with us (as long as the quarantine time made sense.. no sense to take a pet with us if they'd spend the entire time in quarantine). Now, most of the time the travel was 9months/3 months (aka, we always spent the summers with my grandparents). We never transported livestock, but we have friends who traveled by plane with their horses, and others who traveled with their 200 odd pound mastifs.

Dogs certainly have an easier time traveling than most cats... as dogs can be sedated more easily in general. Most cats don't take to sedatives very well (you always want to do a trial run with sedatives at home with any pet that you haven't traveled with before, if you plan on sedating them. I've yet to meet a vet who wasn't cool with this).

Many people also travel crate train their pets (increasing times per day in the crate with treats), while others figure it's a 12-24 hr max thing.

I couldn't imagine moving without our pets. I'm not particularly fond of plane rides either (as a passenger especially, yuck), but it's really quite a short period of time. All our animals have spent longer in the vet's office.

Whoops... my allergy meds are kicking in so I may be getting disjointed. If so my apologies

1 mom found this helpful
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R.M.

answers from Nashville on

Maybe you could call your local rescue shelter. Not the pound but there are private rescue shelters that place pets with families and part of what they do is foster pets with people while they are trying to place them permanently. Maybe they would have a suggestion or a name to give you of someone who could take them in a long-term arrangement. We had maybe a dozen of these rescue shelters in Phoenix, I would call every single one in your area and ask if they have any advice. (You can just google Golden Co Pet Rescue and you will get lots of results.)

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