My son is 3 months old and it seems he already has separation anxiety. Whenever someone else takes care of him so I can leave to run errands or take a break, he's ok for a couple of hours but then he has a break down and cries and cries for 15 minutes. This happens even when I leave him at home with his dad. Nothing apparently calms him down... he stops crying when he's so exhausted that he falls asleep or when I happen to get home during his breakdown. Any suggestions for what we can do? Thanks.
At 3 months old a couple of hours without mama is a lot. It just sounds like he has a breaking point of how long he can stand to be without you. I mean, to him, the two of you are still practically one being. That would be like missing an arm or leg for 3 hours. I'd freak out too! Maybe just keep your time away from him to 1 1/2 hours to get errands done, but try to understand that he's still a widdle guy.
He needs his mommy. He is still very young. I would try not to be gone more then a couple of hours. I never left my kids that young this is an easy age to take with you to run errands. May be if you slowly work into longer times away if you have too. He will get used to it but why should he have to the easy fix is when he has had enough go back to him and assure him you are there. No one can replace the comfort of Mom not even daddy.
Typical Seperation Anxiety doesn't occur until around 6 months old, and is usually when the infant realizes that their primary caregiver (Mommy usually) isn't there and it doesn't usually take two hours. For my son, it was immediate realization that Mommy was gone or leaving...
It sounds like your very young little one is in need of something that only you can provide...is he breastfed? Have you thought about his usual routine and what/when his needs should be met? Usually babies don't cry unless they need something, and this is what it sounds like your son is doing. At this stage, many infants are fed every 2 to 3 hours or on demand which for me and my son was every couple of hours depending on how hungry he was at the time.
At this age, I didn't leave my son to run errands(haircut was about it), but always took him with me. He loved being exposed to the sights and sounds of the market, the mall or the street for walks to the Starbucks. I understand needing a break, that time can be really necessary on certain days but, do you really need to be gone for more than two hours? Is there a way you can incorporate your errands and activities with your son?
I used the tips from Baby Center for when I had to go back to work when my son was one, and it was a tough transition but it worked out okay. I depended on Grandma until daycare was necessary for a few months, but otherwise I never left him with anyone he didn't have a bond with prior. It can be frightening for babies, especially since a lot of their comfort is based on the scent of those who they are 'familiar' with and have bonded to.
http://www.babycenter.com/0_separation-anxiety_145.bc#art...
I hope you can find a way to keep your little one happy, and find some time for you as well!
Good Luck.
Very normal. It means he's well bonded to you... good for you! He's going to have very normal separation anxiety for quite a while. I suggest your husband and he spend more time together while you are home and for smaller increments of time when you are away. Eventually, he will come to learn that dad takes great care of him in a different way than mom. I agree w/ the first responder. Three hours is quite a long time for a three month old. Eventually you will be able to regain some of your independence but for the first several months, tough on the little one to be gone for any great length of time.
Take care of you in small ways!
Jen
