My three year old son is a very happy, good natured little boy. My husband and I love him to pieces, and usually really enjoy being around him (except for those "darling" terrible 3 moments-haha). He wants little to do with me most of the time (unless we are doing a fun new project or something he REALLY enjoys doing) especially when his daddy is home. I do understand that this can be somewhat normal, so I do my best at not letting it hurt my feelings. This past week though, he has been going through MAJOR separation anxiety when his daddy has to leave for work, or when he just makes a quick trip to the grocery store! If my husband walks out the front door to check the mail, my son runs out to him in a panic, thinking he is leaving without him or without telling him (which neither of us ever does-we always tell him where we are going and give him a hug and a kiss goodbye). I took my son with me today to run errands, (my husband wasn't going into work until later this afternoon) and he pitched a complete fit in the car when we were driving away from the house. He screamed and cried his eyes out for "DADDY" and kept crying and saying that he wanted to go home. I try to console him when he gets upset like this, and I've also tried just talking calmly to him and explain to him that we are going to run errands and that we will be back before his daddy has to go to work, but nothing I do or say helps him. I sometimes joke with my husband (not in my son's presence) and say that our son doesn't like me, but I am starting to kinda feel that way. I don't have time to play with him constantly (housework needs to be done, dinner needs to be made, etc.) but I do spend the majority of everyday doing activities that my son enjoys (going to the park, taking him to fun places, etc.). He does attend a part-time preschool twice a week, and loves it, so I know that he isn't just "bored" with me. Has anyone else had the same experience? How long does this "phase" last? How can I make the separation from his daddy less painful for him?
Curious too see your answers....My 4 yr old likes my husband way more then me LOL
He usually works from home, but travels one to two nights a week. And when he's gone....The tears flow!
I try to be patient and understanding but it gets hard. Makes me feel unloved LOL and when he's home, he can't evenl eave the room w/ out him!
I have a baby boy and am expecting this to happen one day. I hear that it is just a phase. Use this time to share your boy, afterall he was probably attached to you day and night as a baby, and maybe work on making yourself a little girl to have tea parties with ;)
My six year old daughter has been like this since she was an infant. My husband works evenings and she screamed for three hours every night when she was a baby. I could not do anything to comfort her. She was even breastfed and that did not even work. I felt like a complete failure. Over the years she has gotten better, but we still have our days/nights. There have been many nights that she is crying in bed for daddy. I found that giving her a picture of the two of them that she could hold would help. I just used a printout that we got at Chuck E Cheese one time. It was just the paper with no frame. That really seems to comfort her now. Sometimes it will just take a quick phone call to daddy so he can tell her that he loves her. I tell my husband all the time that she does not like me, and that she only wants him.
I have heard just to carry on as normal when your kids do this, the more attention he gets for it, the more the behavior will continue. If he starts yelling in the car about dad, I would just say 'sorry you miss daddy, but you will see him soon. Lets pick out a special treat for daddy while we are at the store and you can give it to him when we get home...' Maybe that would help??
If it makes you feel better, your child doesnt cry for you because he is more secure with you and your attachment. He is not worried because he knows you will come back... Or maybe its because daddy lets him have chocolate milk, pop and unlimited snacks, thats what goes on at my house, lol. Also my husband is a total pushover and lets my dd take her guinea pig in her room. So theres lots of asking for daddy at our house too. Like everything else, this too is a phase, in the meantime you get to enjoy showering without having the door beat down.
