Hi all! I have twin girls who are nearly 15 months old. One is a wonderful sleeper and the other needs a bit of help which is what brought me here....
Some background: My girls go to bed by 7pm, A wakes up at 7 or 7:30 while E wakes as early as 5 or 5:15. An early waking would be fine if she woke up pleasant but she doesn't. Instead she needs a nap by 8 because she is so crabby. I need help getting her to sleep later so she is well rested and ready for our day. I have tried letting her cry but it doesn't make a difference. All it does is wake her sleeping sister(and sometimes even her brother). In addition she has no self sootheing skills. She doesn't suck her thumb, use a binky or anything, she just screams. Any suggestions would be great. Here are my main questions:
How do I get her to sleep longer?
How do I get a 15 month old to learn to self soothe?
Should I separate the girls so that I can let E learn to sleep longer or play happily in her bed until wake up?
Just a thought...but often kids will go back down sooner than you think. Maybe you could get up when she gets up at 5/5:30 sit with her quietly somewhere, give her something to eat or drink and try putting her down again by 6/6:30. That would at least hopefully eliminate her sleeping again from 8 to whatever when the other one is awake.
Hi there,
Two things. First, I definitely agree that the girls sleeping together may be interrupting their sleep. I've seen that over and over with my kids, that they don't sleep as well with anyone as they do alone.
Second, a fifteen month old's schedule really seems to be something they create for themselves. You can keep kids up later, give them naps or stop giving them naps. put them to bed earlier, and still they may just wake up too early, because that's when their internal clock is set. Sleep deprivation tends to make sleep more difficult rather than easier. They sleep less when overtired.
As for self soothing, I truly believe the idea of it is a myth. Babies and toddlers aren't programmed to stop needing mommy.
For help with sleep issues you can look at www.drsears.com. He has a lot of useful facts and tips.
Good luck!
I had a similar instance with my oldest. I determined that he was clostrophobic. He slept fine as long as he wasn't in his crib. Once I replaced his bed with a toddler bed he slept fine in his room. I just put a babygate on his door to make sure he stayed in his room when he woke up.
hi A.. here are my thoughts: every child is different. your schedule for A seems to be working. I would try to keep E up an hour or so later and see what happens. I would also seperate the two if it's an option. you don't want them to become too dependant on eachother and i believe being able to sleep alone helps them become more independant as well as more secure in the long run, which in turn will allow them to learn to self soothe. who knows, maybe E sleeping with a sibling actually interrupts her sleep and wakes her. if she's a lighter sleeper maybe the movements or sounds of her sibling are waking her when she's not ready and causing the fussiness. good luck!! hope this helps.
I did two things when my children woke up cranky and too early for me, first I gave them a drink of water... and lay them back down, second if the first doesn't work I lay down with them on the couch or back in my bed for an extra hour or two.
Alot of time the water tippy cup in there own bed worked. They were able to get a drink and then the cup seemed to be a comfort thing and soother.
Good luck
L.
Hi A.,
I also have a 15 month old girl that wakes up about an hour or two to early. I'm not sure if you would want this as an option for your house, but I take her out of her crib and bring her into our bed for the last hour. If I am ready to get up for the day, I lay with her until she falls back asleep and leave her in the bed. She wakes up sweet and pleasant as opposed to the little monster I have on my hands when she doesn't have the extra sleep. I know some people are against "co-sleeping" but this method has worked well for us. Good luck!
Hi A.~
You've had some good replies, I can't add too much and twins are a special twist of their own, aren't they!
My little guy was not a good self-soother either; no thumb, no binkie. He did have the burp cloth he became attached to. My response was to LET him try to self soothe...which meant cry instead of my picking him up everytime; made sure he was okay, then rubbed his back for just 30 sec., wait, rub again if needed. You probably can't try more hands-off unless you separate them.
What could be waking her up?? Physical discomfort, bright lights, noises? Does she need a sippy cup for water in the morning? Is she more sensitive in other areas? I would wonder why she's waking up (hurting?) crabby...just sleep deprived or...? Can she tell you if she's hurting somewhere? She might be able to tell you when she's in a good mood. Sometimes I have to take a break and go into survival mode for a few days before trying to figure it out again. Best wishes to you and your family....you'll figure something out as all caring mommies do!! :)
Have you tried letting her come sleep with you when she wakes up? In my experience, some of my kids require more parenting than others. I also feel the whole self- soothe thing is an excuse to not parent.
When my youngest was born, my biggest goal was to coordinate naps. To help change the new baby's and my 3 year olds sleep schedules, I basically tried to stimulate them as little as possible during the times I wanted them to sleep. When E wakes up in the morning, take her and sit in a dimly lit room, rock with a blanket and sing or play classical music. Or if you have another trick you use at bedtime to soothe her, do it!! Try to keep her calm and inactive until the other one wakes up. Before long she'll naturally add that to her sleep time. It will probably take a couple weeks, and can be frustrating, but perservere because it worked very well for us - with my 2 little ones and when my oldest was not sleeping through the night.
