Sleep Training Advice

I used the Ferber method with my daughter and started her between 3 and 4 months. It worked well with her but I guess every baby is different. When she has a sleeping "relapse" and starts waking up in the middle of the night or something, I just do Ferber again. Works every time. Good Luck!!!

The no cry sleep solution book by Pantley has helped us greatly! You can tailor a plan to fit your needs and family using some or all of her suggestions.

Hi M.,

We sleep-trained our kids and I believe it was the best thing for them and us! We used Dr. Weissbluth's Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child book. Worked wonderfully! He suggests that an infant is not mature enough to do this until at least 4 months of age. My oldest was almost 6mo when we did it. With my second I just was more aware of the sleep cues and what he was trying to tell me. He was 4 mo and we never really had to "train" much. He did it on his own. Good luck with whatever you choose.

Check out Brazelton's book on sleep. Please take careful note of what age is appropriate for sleep training for infants. To my recollection, none of the books recommended sleep training before 6 months.

the book that helped me was " The baby whisperer solves all your problems." she's very practical.

Hi M.,
I hate to say this but I would let my daughter cry for a bit. At first it was just for 5 minutes every time I put her down and then I would hold her, and then the next day I let her cry for 10 minutes and then I would hold her, up until 20 minutes at a time. It took her about 3 days with the crying for up to 20 minutes and she has put herself to sleep ever since. I highly recommend the Ferber book mainly because he has some interesting research about sleep. For example, did you know there is a "forbidden zone" where when the child is in that zone, it doesn't matter what you do-there ain't no going to sleep! This forbidden zone comes in between sleepy stages. So first the child is acting sleepy and ready for bed and then all of a sudden, he's no longer tired and gets a second wind. That's the forbidden zone. And then after that comes another sleepy stage-the one you can put your child to bed easiest. Ferber has a lot more to say-that's just one interesting and helpful tidbit.
Just do what works for you and you will be happier for it. Good luck and congratulations!

I did not sleep train either of my older children (4 and almost 2) nor will I train my 5 month old. All sleep well. I always nursed and/or rocked them to sleep, and once they weaned themselves I didn't always even rock them. Now they just lie down and go to sleep, though sometimes we lie down with them. For us, it was more important that our children see sleep as a happy, peaceful place and not one with any trauma. We have had no problems getting our children to sleep. What is important, I think, is ROUTINE. Bath, then cuddle and stories, and then drift off to sleep. I am a personal believer that we are parents 24 hours of the day and if my little ones sometimes need us to lie down with them because they are "scared" then I am happy to do it. But that's me.

A book I highly recommend is Elizabeth Pantley's The No Cry Sleep Solution. In it she emphasizes how important it is to log the sleep habits and analyze them later to see where you need to work on things. What are your goals?

Many many experts agree that sleep "training" should wait until 6 months of age. Sleeping through the night is not really that common in young infants, and "sleeping through the night" is considered a stretch of 5 hours! Not what WE necessarily want....LOL If sleeping all night long is your goal, I am not sure that I would be of any help - I nursed my babies at night if they needed that, and at 3 1/2 months old, my babies DEFINITELY needed it. I would think they would need formula overnight at that age, too.

Just my 2 cents. My kids are wonderful sleepers who do not give us trouble at night, but I believe it is because we use a routine and are ok with soothing them if they need it. At some point they know what it feels like to be soothed and sooth themselves. I don't believe that soothing your babies doesn't allow them to learn self-soothing. Mine learned that just fine! I feel that my children are extremely confident little people and I think it's due in large part to how willing we are to step in and soothe them when they need it.

I highly recommend the book, "12 Hours Sleep by 12 Weeks," by Suzy Giordano. I used this book with my son, who is now 3, and he still sleeps for 12 hours at night and takes a 2-3 hour nap during the day. He is such a happy guy and I attribute much of this to his schedule. The book is a quick, easy read. Everyone I know who has used this book has been happy and the process is easy to follow.

Swaddling was always the trick that worked for my kids and any that I have babysat.

If you have a routine of her eating at regular intervals and sleeping at regular intervals, too, I wouldn't think it will be too hard to get her to learn to self-soothe to sleep. We used Babywise (actually the version which includes some scripture and such called "Along the Infant Way" (www.gfi.org)) with all four of our kids. It worked well. They suggest a sleep, eat, wake time routine from about the 2nd week of life. The kid eats as soon as she gets up, has some awake and play time, and then goes to bed. For us, our schedule now (my youngest is almost 3 months) would be feed at 8am, tummy time or play time or errands til about 10am, nap til 12pm and then start over. You can be a bit flexible if she tires sooner than that. I just give him a kiss, tell him I love him and then put him in his crib. Sometimes he gives that last cry for a few minutes, but then he goes to sleep. All my kids are great sleepers. No one fusses about bed time. Even if they're not quite ready to sleep, they are happy to hang out in their crib/bed til they fall asleep and hang out in there for a little while in the morning if I'm not quite ready to get them. There have been times that we had to let them cry it out and no one seems permanently scarred. They seem to be very confident in our feelings for them. Good luck!

Hi M.,

I'm almost in your same boat. But my little one is 2 1/2 months.....I've been wondering how and when I'm going to start sleep training. I also have a 3 yr old, and as you know, it's harder to stay on top of things with the baby when you've got a toddler to take care of! Anyway, I started sleep training my 3 yr old when she was 5 months. We'd rock her til drowsy, put her in crib, and leave the room. She'd cry, we'd let her cry for 5 min. then go in to "reassure" her. Then 10 min, go back inside to reassure, then let her cry for 15 min., and so on. It worked pretty well, from what i remember. So I'm gonna try that same method but I think when he's 4 months. I've heard it's not recommended to start sleep training them earlier than 12 wks..... If you ever want to discuss, shoot me an email! ____@____.com Good luck.

At 2 months we began sleep training our son. This is how we did it. We would put his bassinet right by our bedside, and everytime he began to squirm to wake up for a bottle we would gently put our hand on his chest until he went back too sleep (we stopped feeding him in the middle of the night), the first few nights you will do this several time through out the night, by about 3 or 4 nights, our son stopped waking up. after taht he would sleep from 8:30 pm to 4 am and he slowly slept longer. Now he is 11 months old and we put him down at 7:30 and he wakes up at 7 am. The key is to stop feeding them in the middle of the night. We were able to do this so early on because his weight was well, if your child is under weight etc. I would wait until she is at a good weight.

hope this helps,

L.