Stay at Home Mom Blues

I'm in the same boat that you're in. I have a 5,3, and 6 month old as well. After a while you start to feel like your brain is turning into mashed potatoes from lack of use. I did the MOMS club thing which was nice for a while, but then I got sick of talking about my kids all the time. How many teeth does your baby have? BLAH, BLAH....same ole thing. I could never get past the superficial questions. I did make one really good friend there which was worth the experience, but dropped MOMS club when I realized it was mostly for new moms.

I'm not sure what the solution is, but wanted to let you know you're now alone! I'll keep reading the advice you get for me as well. It would be nice to have conversations again that don't involve children, poops, and dinner time.

I have a very similar situation. I am mom to 3, a boy 4.5, a boy 2.5 and a girl 7 mo. I love my babies, but need some me time. Caring for the needs of 4 other people( my husband included) leaves little time for anything else. My saving grace is first the Lord who gives me strength to do it all! To keep myself sain my husband and I go on dates periodically, which I know can be a huge task, but it is worth it. You can always put the kids to bed early and have a date at home.
And finally try to find a great play group with moms that you can relate with, or make your own. I have a great group, that I am fortunate to be a part of, we meet once a week, either at someones house or the park or wherever. The kids can play, the moms can have a cup of coffee and just have a little adult time. You would be suprised what an hour or two can do. The whole group including the kids, look forward to our time together each week. Well that is my two cents, I hope that it helps!

I have been in your shoes (heck, I am in your shoes, also being a full-time mom!). But, I hesitate to say "stay-at-home" because we're always on the go. My boys are 7 and 4 now, so it has gotten easier, but we've always been out doing things. Getting out of the house is key.

I was very active in a MOMS Club when they were 4 and 1 or so, and met a lot of really good girlfriends that way (I have about 10 that I could call anytime for just about anything). I honestly don't know what I'd do without them. We commiserate about, and often celebrate, raising our kids, since we're all in the same boat. As my boys have gotten older, my activity within MOMS Club has decreased (I am still a member and will be for a while more), but I still socialize with those friends pretty often--we have a book group, wine club (without kids, but with husbands!), etc. My boys are also really good friends with some of their kids, so we can "playdate swap"--I'm still the primary caregiver ("at home"--ha!) for my kids, but sibling bickering or boredom is minimal.

Also, outside of MOMS Club, I've gotten into other hobbies--Jazzercise, quilting, knitting--more so in the past couple years, which gives me some things to do. I may not play or interact with my kids every second of the day, or we may not be home all the time, but I think that they are growing up to be polite, strong kids, and I'm not going crazy. And since that's my goal, we're doing great.

Good luck to you!

This winter was espicially hard for me. I was just talking to friend the other day because I was feeling like a horrible mom because I was so tired of my daughter! I only have one child; I can't imagine how you feel with three. MY 3 year old is a great kid too so, that makes it so much worse. Anyway, I talked to my husband about it a little and some of my other SAHM friends. I trade off watching their kids and they watch my daughter. That way my daughter gets some interactive time with her friends too. It is not much but, a couple of hours can really help. Espicially if you like to run. It sounds like you watch other kids so maybe you could ask those parents to return the favor. I don't know if you do it for money but, maybe you could have them watch your kids for a couple of hours and not have them pay. (If the money isn't a big issue) One of my SAHM friends(2 kids) also has a plan with her husband. When he gets to go do things for himself on the weekends; she banks the hours that he has and the next time she gets that many hours to herself too. That really works for them because he gets time and she gets time. What my husband and I have started doing now is to each have a day off on the weekend. Saturday he gets to do what ever he wants. Even if he stays home he doesn't have to do anything that day to help. ( He helps alot in the evening too) Then on Sunday, I get the day off. I can go do anything I want or if I stay home I don't have to do anything to help. ( but, I usaully leave. It is harder as the mom to not help) I hope some of this helps. It has been really hard for me to step up and admit to my family and friends that I need some time away but, they all have understood and been supportive. One friend told me to remember. Thaose who work get to leave their stuff behind, we have a 24 hour job! She also said that if we take care of ourselves as moms then our children are happier. I have seen a big difference in my self and my daughter.