My husband has had 3-4 weeks of H3LL--poor guy! Emergency maintenance (malfunctioning ice maker, sump pump on the fritz with flooded basement) in the middle of the night, a work reorganization in a demanding field, nagging illness (cold/sinus/?flu) that won't go away just to name a few. He normally goes out with the guys 2 x month but that has be on hold due to scheduling difficulties.
What do you do to give your man a break? I've tried to lighten his load at home with the kids, told him to go to bed when he doesn't feel well etc but he just doesn't seem to get the "recharge" he so badly needs. He is financially conservative so he doesn't spend money on himself lightly (although he did just buy a new set of golf clubs he has yet to swing).
I need some ideas!
*** I've offered sex but he doesn't feel well and really is just so wiped out that he isn't into it :( ***
I would just take the kids out of the house for the day. That's what my husband (and me, but that never happens!) would like the most. That way he can lay around, watch TV, nap, do whatever he wants and not feel guilty that he isn't helping.
My first thought is, holy cow lady you are making me look so bad... lol
Second was, sex!
We're supposed to be giving our men a break? Uh...oh.... :)
humidifier first and foremost for his cold/etc.
can you set him up with a spa day? or schedule a massage at your house?
I think a 6 pack of nice beer, a massage, and a really nice dinner in are nice things for a guy...
Is it possible to send the kids to Grandma's for the weekend?
SLEEP!!!!!!! Lots and lots of it, if not sleep then relaxing on the couch or in bed with a good movie or book.
For a lower buget version can you take the kids to visit a friend or relative overnight? Then he can get a real rest at home. Maybe he will take you up on the sex when he has had a rest! But I have bad sinuses and it really can ruin the mood sometimes.
Okay I can relate to you. My hubby works 92 hours every two weeks as a car salesman and his is always so exhausted. Some days more than others. When he is sick he just wants to be babied and that is what I give him. He hates spending money as well so he never treats himself unless it is like works clothes or something he needs.
I always give him a massage it does not have to be a long one my hubby will even enjoy a 10 minute foot massage or neck massage etc.
The other thing I do is sometimes bathe him as funny as the may sound. I make a warm bath and add baby oil because his skin is so dry and then tell him to go soak in the tub. I always make sure the kids are alseep so he can completely soak in peace. Then I sit outside the tub ontop of the toilet and talk to him about anything. Then I sponge bathe him and etc. This winds him down and then a quick massage really relaxes him and lets him go in a deep sleep.
I also make the kids be extra quite when daddy is alseep so he does not wake and can really get his rest. I bring him his meds and drinks to bed and sometimes a soup to bed.
Cook him his favorite meal or dessert that always puts my hubby in a great mood.
Sometimes I just put the kids to bed and cuddle him while rubbing the back of his neck or scratching his back lightly to get him to bed and relax just the two of us.
Hope this gives you some ideas. I don't do these all the time but do switch it up since my hubby works extra hard to I can stay at home. I always try to make sure he knows we appreciate his hard work and efforts.
Wow! It must be really bad if he's not into sex! That was my first suggestion. Second, I'd say R &R. Get hotel room for the weekend, even if it's the same town you're in, and order pizza and just stay in with peace and quiet. Then he can sleep in the next morning, hit the golf course for a few hours and spend quiet quality time with you. See a matinee or get a nice lunch. It could be a few hundred dollar for a weekend like that, but if you ask me, it's so worth it. Seems like most often we have to physically step away from our life in order to re-center and recover. Good luck.
(Trying to think about this for you has actually led me to KNOW that this is exactly what me and my hubby need. Sometimes we just gotta do this stuff. It become a need not a want.)
P.S. If money is an issue, camping is a cheaper escape. Although I guess if you're not southern coastal that'd have to wait.
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He just need to rest and sleep well. Hot tea & lemon, or tea & honey every 4 hours and at bedtime. Yes, they do need rest also.
My husband went through the same time ago. I gave him what I mentioned before, and I tried to keep problems away, there are some that I could fix myself and others just waited and were fixed together. I don't think sex at this time would be something he needs, he just need rest and recharge batteries. Just remember how you feel when you are sick or stressed out...It is awful!...
Be patience.....and take care of yourself as well....
