My mom has been staying with us for a couple months now and initially my son (19 months old) was all about her-- calling her name a mile a minute. She did a few times, in the morning, take over from me with the changing diaper duties and giving him his vitamins and stuff to help out some. He hates having his diaper changed lately and literally runs from anyone that starts the process.
Anyways, recently, he is not going to her anymore, saying no when she comes near and not letting her carry him and so on. He does still call her name and is normal at times. This is not only bothering her alot, it is concerning me as well. Do toddlers have phases they go through like this? She LOVES him so much and is really affected by this sudden change.. Any advise is helpful!
Yes, this is totally normal. Unless there is some underlying problem where he decides he doesn't like her for something specific, it is most likely a phase that will pass soon.
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This is normal. Some children will only want mom, even tell dads, 'No Dad!" with screaming and running away from people that normally they would love on.
.. It is just a phase. I know it hurts her feelings, but let her know this is a stage. He is becoming more aware of the people in his life. He is noticing the coming and going. He is wanting to control situations. He wants things to go his way and he does not have all of the words. Do not force him..
Maybe try. "Go with gran for 2 minutes while I get the laundry." You can help him avoid some separation anxieties by giving him a heads up and some choices to give him control about what is about to happen. "I am going to take my shower. You and gran are going to play outside in 5 minutes. Do you want to take your cup of juice or a cup of water with you?"
It's hard to say for sure, one can only speculate...however perhaps initially it was exciting! I mean Grandma is here and Grandma is cool, etc. But kids have an idea of what Grandparents are like. For example, my almost 5 yr. old daughter thinks that Grammy and Grandpa are super cool and always do fun things and that if she lived with them she would always be doing these things. What she doesn't realize is that Grammy and Grandpa actually do have rules and long-term stays don't mean fun fun fun. Perhaps his impression of her is changing because initially his visits with her were on a different level...it wasn't long-term. He could be confused and also he might be feeling that she is being too "mommy-like" and doesn't want to have that kind of relationship with her since you're mommy if this makes sense.
As far as diapering goes, I'm not surprised he's running off, that might just be developmental and may have nothing to do with your mother. Perhaps he is almost ready for potty training. Kids go through many developmental stages...physical and emotional.
Perhaps Grandma should not be so involved in the mothering process...discipline, diapering, feeding, etc. Not to say she shouldn't do any of those things...but maybe just not as much. He might be trying to tell you that he wants his mommy.
I have to agree, it is completely normal. And probably really upsetting to your Mom. I have a 2.5 y/o and she goes through the same thing with everyone other then me. I do notice if people back off & not try so hard with her, then she will come around to them. Kids just go through phases of things, and being around different people sometimes behave differently then with Mom. Good luck, I know it's frustrating, but I would just have your Mom back off for a little while and then slowly start changing diapers & some of the other tasks.
I think it's completely normal. My 4 year old did the same thing with my mom several month ago when he was still 3. He has always been close with her as she only lives 1/2 mile away and sees them all the time. He went through a phase where he refused to hug/kiss her and didn't want anything to do with her. It hurt her feelings but she knew it was just a phase and gave him his space. Now he's back to everything Grandma again. I really wouldn't worry too much and ask your mom not to either. Just don't force him to get close to her or yell at him for not. He will get over it!!
Yes they do so don't let it get you down. At first grandma was like the new toy that he played with all the time and you couldn't take it from him without a fight. Now that the newness has worn off and he see that grandma will be around all the time so he has gotten picky about when he will play. We as adults do the same thing, we are not as obvious with ours as children. He will go back and forth between wanting mommy/daddy or granny many times before he turns 50. Don't take it personal, he loves you all.
I think it's normal as well. My son has gone through strong Mommy only phases just to be followed with no Mommy I want Daddy.
So if it can happen with Mom and Dad I'm sure it happens with anyone living in the house.
Don't take it personal. He'll snap out of it soon enough.
My daughter is like this with my husband. She runs hot and cold with him. Some days she adores him, some days she literally pushes him away. It hurts his feelings, but we don't push her. This is very normal for toddlers. Sometimes she pushes me away in favor of her beloved Tuesday/Thursday nanny. I don't take it personally. She's 2.
