Teaching My 2 Year Old with Speech Delays to Use the Potty?

I waited till my son was 3 because I was intimidated. I let him be around when I pottied, had a little potty for him, and he went when he wanted to. He went to kindercare and the teacher there trained him and helped me train at home with helpful hints. He was trained in about a month. Don't push it.

One thing that always clued me in that they are ready is that they are dry after naps and in the morning when they wake up. From there I watch for them to be able to take their own pants down. I don't rush mine to potty train at all. I would rather they be trained to go when they need to and not me trained to set them on the toilet when I know they will go. If you give it enough time those little ones can be trained in about a week. I don't do pull-ups those are just silly. When they are ready, we go out and buy some cool underpants and we go from there. I think your little one has enough on her plate learning to talk. Let her grow at her own pace. Encourage her but don't get to pushy. They are only little for such a short time. You can keep showing her the potty and encouraging her but don't push.

It's really common for kids even older than 2 to regress on potty training when a new baby comes into the family.
They can't help but notice the baby gets all sorts of attention - so they want to be babies again too at least for a little bit.
It's going to be an uphill battle potty training for right now.
Give it 6 or so months till everyone's adjusted to the new baby then give it a try.

Even if she has verbal delays and has problems with expressive speech (telling you what she wants), she apparently is fine on receptive language.. she understands what YOU say.

You can always start teaching her some "baby sign" so she does have a way to communicate... we did that with my grandson.... and as his expressive speech got better, he frequently would sign AND say the item at the same time... giving them the opportunity to use sign language doesn't delay the verbal language... it can enhance it, and help ease frustration as she is able to tell you more of what she wants.

There is nothing wrong with starting potty training.... and frankly, I think we wait too long sometimes..... at 2, she is willing to work with you and do what you ask her. If you wait much longer, she may reach that "stubborn" stage many toddlers go through between ages 2 and 3..... where she just doesn't WANT to do what mommy says!

Ultimately, it may also be training you more.... that you get into the habit of asking her to sit on the toilet frequently during the day and attempt to go. It may still be a while until she exhibits TRUE potty maturity and goes on her own without assistance. At this point, I'm sure you will have to continue to tell her to do all the steps... pulling down her pants, sitting for a long enough period of time, etc..... If she is holding her urine for fairly long periods of time, she is physically ready.

I would get into the habit of asking her frequently during the day, especially before you go out somewhere, to sit on the potty and try to go..... if she is willing to sit with you, and have you read a book or something, that is great... she will eventually get the idea to relax certain muscles so she can willingly pee on the potty and such.

Good luck!

We didn't even have a bathroom in the 2 year old room in most of the childcare centers I have either owned or worked in. I suggest you consider waiting until your child is old enough mentally and physically to be potty trained.

As for letting them sit on the potty while you're going or while you're running their bath water, etc...is fine. There is no pressure this way to perform something they are incapable of doing.

I think that just wanting them to be done with diapers is a bit frustrating for you but if you take the diapers off all you do is make more work for yourself with the mopping up pee and pooh off the floor then having to either buy a carpet cleaner machine and using it numerous times per day or mopping with disposable pads to sanitize the flooring.

Then you'll add at least double to your laundry expenses and time doing that too.

Each load of laundry costs you money for water, laundry soap, fabric softener, dryer sheets, electricity, and natural gas plus you lose all your free time that you would have if you didn't have that extra laundry...

SO YOUR COSTS GO UP when you take one out of diapers before they're staying dry. The cost of pull ups or diapers is minimal to the expense and work you'll be doing with taking them out before they are staying dry most of the time.

if you start trying to train her now.. it will take a long long time to train her.. you will get frutstrated.. she will get frustrated...

If you wait till she is ready she will train quickly.. it will be easy

My daughter was an early talker.. and she potty trained in 3 days at 2 years and 4 months..

I do not do pullups.. I put them in cotton training pants..(thick ones from target or walmart) take them potty every 30 mintues... they wet a lot the first day.. but on the 3rd day they get it...

I sugguest waiting till she is at least 2 years 6 months and she is speaking clear enough to tell you what she wants and needs.

It is possible to potty train a non - verbal child, however, the child needs to be ready for potty training. First and foremost she needs to be able to communicate in some way that she needs to go potty. It can be a sign, tugging at her bottoms, or running to the potty. My guy was very verbal but never told me he had to go, he just went. At almost 4 he's been trained over a year and a half, but he still only tells me if we're out and about and he needs a bathroom.

She also needs to get to the bathroom herself, and pull her pants up and down without help. She should show an interest in bathroom activities, as well as appear to be bothered by a wet or soiled diaper. Her bladder and bowels should be developed enough that she has dry periods of several hours between peeing, and passes solid, well formed stools. She should be able to follow simple instructions, capable of some cooperation, and aware of her own accomplishments. The article below talks about potty training a non-verbal child.

http://www.ehow.com/how_###-###-####_potty-train-child-do...

In your case it doesn't seem she's ready to be taught, it's best you work on pre-training. Teach her how to pull her pants up and down, you can work on this in the morning when she wakes up, at naptimes, at bathtime, and bedtime. Also take her to the bathroom when you go (same sex parent is the best role model for toilet training) so she can learn what to do: pull pants down, do your business, wipe, flush, pull pants up and wash hands. Get books on potty training and read them to her, DVD's on potty training are good, too, we had Elmo. Also, keep in mind that it's best to wait with any child at least 6 months after a major life event (in her case the birth of a new sibling) to begin potty training.

Work on getting her ready to train and by sometime this summer she should be ready to teach.

If you didn't want two children in diapers then.....

My son was delayed and we did not potty train successfully (tried and many fails) until he was 4 and could clearly communicate and understand his bodies cues. My son also has ADHD, Sensory issues and his speech is now "good to go" but had therepies until 5. I hope this helps, I just do not think it's good to push it depending on what she is working on with the specialists.

Delays or not, kids are not ready to be toilet trained simply because their parents want them to be done with diapers.
Have you seen signs of readiness - awareness of being wet/dirty, dry diapers for a few hours, etc?
Telling you that they have to go is actually a late sign of the training process. With my first, I waited for that magical day that she'd tell me she needed to go and when she was 3 years and a month and that day didn't come, I realized I'd been going about it the wrong way. With your young 2, I'd say to use cloth diapers or heavy cloth trainers, so she'll learn what happens when she pees - she feels really wet. Then she'll realize how it feels just before that happens. Meanwhile, take her to the toilet about every hour. Don't ask if she has to go, don't make it an option, just take her, every hour that she's awake. Don't do it once in a while or inconsistently. If you want her to use the toilet, she has to learn that it's always expected, not an occasional trick.
Good luck

I personally think most kids can not be reliably trained before 2 1/2 unless they are cloth diapered, the parents are super consistant, and/or the child is motivated. Has she given you any signs she is ready like telling you immediately after she has gone? I know she is speech delayed but is she pulling on her diaper or hiding? My son had a speech delay as well and I waited until he was 2 1/2 to even show him the potty and then I let him sit on it while he watched tv for a a coupel months. It wasn't until he was 2 months shy of 3 that I got really serious and trained him in less than a week. He poop trained in a day. If you want to draw the entire thing out so you can pretend that your child is potty trained then go for it. But I reccomend waiting until she is motived and you are ready to commit.

Hi K.,

I worked with toddlers (older toddlers, 20-30 months) specifically for 2.5 years in a daycare setting and was a nanny for quite a few families when their kids were toddlers. Both the ability to communicate AND the interest in using the toilet are important.

I have a guide for you here which might help you in assessing your child's readiness to use the potty independently. This is from

) Stays dry for 2-3 hours at a time or wakes up from a nap with a dry diaper.

2) Shows increased awareness of bodily functions- she may move to a quiet or private spot to have a bowel movement, for instance.

3) Tells you she has peed or pooped in her diaper.

4) Dislikes staying in wet or soiled diapers.

5) Shows interest in wanting to sit on a toilet or potty chair or expresses a desire to wear underwear.

6) Is able to follow two step instructions.

7) Is able to pull pants up and down easily.

(- See more at: http://www.regardingbaby.org/2011/11/28/toilet-learning-m...)

I think your inclination that you are pushing too early is probably a correct one. If she has no interest, that's a hurdle you will not overcome easily. If she has interest, but no way to communicate, then her efforts will be frustrated by repeated accidents.

I will also say this, rather strongly-- when you are ready to really potty train, and see that she is ready too, get her OUT of anything like disposable diapers or pull-ups. Children who can really feel the pee getting their clothes wet are the ones who will often learn the process the most quickly. I found that for most of the kids I worked with, kids who moved from diapers to underpants with no pull-ups during the day nearly always were able to become independent with using the toilet more quickly than those who stayed in pull-ups. They become a bit of a crutch for many parents and kids. With my own son, when we needed something "extra" when he first started toileting (like using the toilet in public, which is scary for some kids--they have a loud flush, and the automatic flusher can scare them-- you can drape toilet paper over the sensor to stop that, by the way), I always put him back in a diaper. This way, there was no confusion.

This is one area that requires a lot of parental patience. If I were in your situation, I would wait a bit until you have some semblance of expressive communication from her. What I would also do is speak to both the early intervention therapist about alternate communication methods (signing, or using picture cards to convey her needs, so that she might be able to hand you a card which tells YOU that she needs to go) and your pediatrician. If you aren't squeamish about it, bring her into the bathroom with you and narrate everything you do, kind of like a tutorial. "I feel like I have to go potty. The first thing I do is push down my pants and underwear. NOW I sit down....etc."

Lastly, cut yourself some slack. With a new baby, write yourself a new script. "I will do what I need to do, and in our own time. My daughter will learn what she needs to learn, when she's ready, in her own time." My guess is that if you ease up on yourself and don't guilt yourself too much about this, you'll feel better. For what it's worth, even with all of the kids I have helped to use the toilet, I waited until my son was nearly 3 years 4 months old to help him learn to use the toilet. He simply wasn't interested before that time. Once we put him in underpants, it took him about a week and only a handful of accidents to be successfully using the toilet. I never asked him *if* he needed to go, just kept telling him "it's time to use the potty" every 1.5 hours or so. Being patient paid off for us. No m&m's, no rewards-- the best reward was staying dry! :)