My daughter is pretty well behaved, she doesn;t hit or throw tantrums, she used to whine and thats gotten to be a lot less lately, but I would like tops for getting her to do a few things.
1. To listen when I ask to stop banging feet against the table at diner, or shooving the table, or getting up from the table, or eating with utensils....she eats well, but during dinner gets antsy quick and wants to get up every few minutes or push the table across the floor ect.
2. how do i get her to stop when i'm done horsing around?
I remember when I was little feeling like it wasn't fair that mom got to intiate play and horsing arnd (tickling rough housing a tiny bit./..)and then all of a sudden gets mad and wants it to stop, so I dont want her to feel like that, but how do you stop horsing around and end in fun? ex: i'm sitting next to a pillow and thump her with it lightly, we're having fun chasing eachother and then eventually it has to end, how so? without it turning not so fun? how can you end a game positively? I don't want to go the opposite route and never horse around with her, but I also want it to end at a certain point
Tips and tricks??
The book "How To Talk So Kids Will Listen, and Listen So Kids Will Talk."
Also if you want horsing-around to eventually end... J. tell her and give her a head's up. ie: "Honey, in 10 minutes we have to stop... because..."
I usually set up rules or give a timeline when playing. Mom will play with you but J. until the microwave goes off or J. 10 minutes or whatever time frame I want to set. Then when its close to time to stop, I transition. Ok, w're playing for 5 more minutes, then we can start your bath. That way everybodys on the same page.
So far as the behaving at the dinner table, still working on that one! My kids want to eat a bite, run for 10 mintues then eat another bite. The only thing that works for them, so far, is bribing - eat it all and get a pudding or a cookie or whatever. But that has it's downfall too. Now they try and negotiate with M... I'll eat my food if you give M. a pudding. Got myself in a pickle with that one.
I would say to end a game by giving a warning - one minute til we're done. Set a timer if you must.
Bad behavior at the table, etc. Tell her the rules beforehand. Tell her what will happen if she breaks them - I will give you one warning and then if you kick the table or throw something on the floor, etc., you will leave the table and dinner will be over. You will be hungry. So sorry. Then follow up. Or once the rules are explained, when she does the thing, without any discussion, turn her chair away from the table facing the wall and set the timer. No discussion makes for no pleading, whining, negotations. Often when they are not given the opportunity for interaction,the attention getting behavior will stop.
Anything you do with your child at age 5 gets one warning. If it still goes on then follow through with the consequence.
Meal times are proper times, period. Sit her down and let her know the rules at meal time. One warning. If it continues she leaves the table and is done eating. She puts her dishes in the sink, cleans her spot, pushes in her chair, picks up any food left on the table, chair and floor and goes brushes her teeth and goes to her room for bed time routine.
- No banging feet or anything at the table.
- Slide your chair out and do not slide the table.
- Getting up from the table means she's done eating. You get up again, you're done!
- Eat properly with utensils.
- No chatter, silliness, fooling around, etc.
Be sure she's good and ready at meal time which means no late snacks and snacks should be light.
Horsing around? As long as you're not being a jerk at the end of playing then what's the big deal. The only time you should be firm with her is when it's time to stop and she refuses to listen. This is when you tell her that if she doesn't stop when she's told you can't play with her like that anymore. Can't play 24/7.
K. B
mom to 5 including triplets
J. tell her gently and calmly that play time has now ended and its time to eat dinner and we use our manners at the table etc. give her reminder before sitting down to dinner about banging fet or getting up. for example. if you have tell her more than once to stop, remove her from table and explain to her why she had to leave etc,,,
