Wondering if any moms have been through this. My 3 year old daughter has been potty trained for a while now and for about the last 3 mo she has been having alot of pooping accidents in her panties. Before she was able to have a normal bowel movement in the toilet but now she has little "accidents" anywhere from 3-5 times a day. She promises me she will stop. I have tried everything I can think of to get her to stop but she will do it even after scolded for it. There have been no new changes in our home so I have no idea what started this. I thought maybe she gets to busy playing but she is able to run to pee on the toilet. I have tried modifying her diet to make sure she is getting enough fiber (she eats alot of fruit and veggies anyways). She is extremely stubborn and I wonder at times if she is doing this especially for me. She does not do this when she stays over at her aunts house. Any advise?
It may be totally out of her control. We just had major digression after 2 years of being potty trained and I was at my wits end. But we went to the Dr. when it became 4-5 times a day and it was medical. The Dr. came up with a treatment plan and it was an imeadiate difference.
Put her back into pull-ups.
No negotiating - take her underpants and stash them.
Tell her it's a laundry issue, and she doesn't get them back til she's had a clean week.
Then let her be in charge of it.
Do a Google search for "encopresis." It sounds like she may have this. It's a medical condition and out of her control, if it is. Our son has had this condition off and on the past six months. If you think encopresis is it, get her in with her pediatrician for a formal diagnosis and treatment options.
Good luck!
Ask your pediatrician about getting an Xray of her intestines. My son had the same issue and it turned out that he was constipated. I was surprised because (1) he eats tons of fruit, veggies, and other forms of fiber and (2) the accidents were runny so he didnt appear to be constipated to me. The xray showed that his intenstines were completely blocked and the accidents were feces seeping from around the blockage. Miramax worked wonders.
It's not uncommon for kids to have set backs in potty training. Also there are very few things kids at this age have cotrol over & toileting is one of those areas. She may just be trying to show her control. The fact that she only does it for you is a pretty good sign of her trying to gain some form of control over something. Dont' get angry w/her or punish her for this as it could just make it worse. I know, easier said than done especially since you were so pleased she's potty trained. Start up a chart & every time she poops in the potty or keeps her pants clean, she gets a star or sticker. Set up the amount you expect her to get & then give her a reward. Maybe for just a couple of days in the beginning cuz any longer than that & she will probably loose interest or forget about it. Give her lotsa praise for staying clean & when she poops in the potty. Hope this helps & good luck!
it may sound mean but i have a 3 year old who did the same thing so what we did was we toke all his toys away and every time he went he got to buy them back one at a time with play money and it worked out great.
My daughter did the same thing until one day... We all were going swimming in our pool and we told her we could not trust her not to poop in the pool. She had to watch us all swim, and believe me, we acted like it was the most fun we have ever had. She wathched us, in tears, for the whole day. It was hard to se her so sad, but she has never pooped her pants again! Good luck!
Put her back in pull ups and tell her when she is ready to use the potty again she can wear her big girl underware. Since she is only doing it at your house it is probably a a power struggle so don't play.
Maybe putting her back in diapers and then telling her very non-judgmentally, and without disapproval that it is only until she is ready to be toilet trained again would do it. The nice thing about 3 year olds is their ability to communicate.
It's a terrible thought to contemplate, but you could also try asking her if anyone is touching or hurting her bottom. Or maybe it is just one of those things with no reason that will one day stop as suddenly as it started. Good luck.
Hi R.,
please have her evaluated by her physician to ensure that there is not a medical reason. It is possible to be pooping around a blockage and the child has little or no control of this. This can occur even when the child is receiving good fiber and fluids and may even seem to be pooping normally at other times. The longer it goes on however the more difficult to recover from. It some times appears intermittent though I'd wonder if she is just not as relaxed at her aunts house and so is "holding it" more.
K.
My son is five and still having skid marks. He doesn't want to come in from playing to go to the bathroom. My advice: When you detect alot of tooting (gas) and she hasn't gone poo poo in a couple of days, sit her on the potty and tell her not to get up until she poops. Usually tooting is an indicator that something is ready to come out.
My son went through this. I found that if I made a big deal out of it, the accidents would continue. I tried to praise the times he pooped on the potty, always making time to stop what I was doing and come look at it in the toilet. When he would have an accident. We would just say,"accidents happen, we will try next time," then go into the bathroom and clean up in there, to remind him that is where the "poopies happen." I know my son would just rather play or watch tv than take the time to poop. He is slowly learning that it doesnt take too long and his toys/the tv will be there when he is done. Hang in there...
Roberta's right. If you make a big deal of this you could be in for more trouble. When you say she's stubborn that says a lot. Those stubborn kids will win when you get into a poop fight with them. She'll stop by 5 at least.
Hi R.,
I feel your frustration. My daughter did the same thing. She was potty trained and then stopped using the potty for poop and only when I was around. It was so frustrating. I started with talking, moved up to bribes of cookies, even tried chocolate and this worked for a bit. The one thing she consistently did, was tell me right after the fact and she was happy to get the wipes and lay down so I could change her (can you say "control"). This made me think that it wasn't bothering her so I finally made her change it - well not completely - but she had to take off her underpants and see what she'd had touching her. She didn't like this at all and after 2 times, she started using the potty again.
I don't know if having her change/see it did the trick, or if it was simply a time and control issue (my daughter is very independent), but she's using the potty again. Hopefully you can find the key to help her change the behavior and/or she grows out of it.
Take care,
L.
R.,
Thank you for asking the question! I am having exactly the same problem with my daughter. You described our situation
to a T! And thank you to all of the people who responded!
I have tried putting my daughter back in pull-ups, but she likes having me lay her down and change her too much, so I went back to panties because she really doesn't like have poop in her panties and she gets upset about it, but keeps doing it.
I was given another suggestion by a friend which I haven't tried because I know that it will require more work for me, but I think I am getting to the point where I will try anything: Make her clean it up! I know my daughter will try to clean it up and she will probably make an even bigger mess in doing so, but she wont like it so it might work! I will then have to go back and clean up after her, but hopefully it will mean fewer clean-ups in the future.
Good luck! Let me know if you find anything that works and I will do the same for you!
D. and Layla
