Toddlers Sitting Still

Updated on January 17, 2012
K.L. asks from Fort Stewart, GA
16 answers

How old were your toddlers when they were able to sit still for a good amount of time? We have such a hard time with our 14 month old son in church and going to story time at the library. I know that this is just a phase, but I am curious as to when others got there. During library story time I have to stand in the back and hold my son because he will absolutely not sit in my lap for mare than 1 minute or so. And this was the same kid that used to sit and listen to me read for 40 minutes at a time before he learned how to crawl!

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So What Happened?

Thank you for all of your responses! Just to be clear, I do not expect my son to sit still when we go places, but was more curious as to when others were actually able to. As I suspected, the age range varies! FOr now we will go and do what we have to while being entertaining!

More Answers

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K.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

I'm sorry, but the words "toddlers" "sitting" and "still" don't work in the same sentence. Unless there's a "aren't known for" between the "toddlers" and "sitting". I'd say that by kindergarten, my kids were able to "sit still" in places like church....so maybe 5 or 6yrs old? But rarely before that, and certainly *never* before the age of three. Pretty typical stuff from your 14month old, I'd say.

6 moms found this helpful
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E.S.

answers from New York on

Toddlers sitting still? ROFLMAO! My 22-month-old turns lapsit story time into running laps. I embrace her appetite for activity, even if it's not convenient.

6 moms found this helpful

J.W.

answers from St. Louis on

They were no longer considered toddlers by the time they could sit still for a good amount of time.

5 moms found this helpful
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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

LOL... Before he learned to crawl, you had a captive audience!

I'm ADHD... so it was pretty natural for me to teach my son how to move without other people seeing you move OR to move in such a way people don't notice/get aggravated about it.

I'm 32 and I don't sit still. Ever. People may THINK i'm sittig still, but I'm really quite busy.

In fact, my son's K class, the teacher would have my son teach lessons on 'how to move sneaky' to other wiggle bodies in the class.

There are 1001 movement tricks, if you're interested.

4 moms found this helpful
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W.R.

answers from Roanoke on

I think it just depends on their personality. My daughter never, ever sits still and she is nearly 4. I have friends whose kids are like mine, and a couple of friends whose kids have always clung right to them and not moved away at all. I expect, though, if yours is only 14 months that you have a ways to go until he sits still! Sorry!

3 moms found this helpful

R.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

Your title struck me as a bit of an oxymoron, lol!

Seriously, my guy will be 3 in April, and doesn't sit still for more than a couple of minutes, storytime, movies, church, etc., with me struggling to hold him down for most of that time, and taking "breaks" about every 15 minutes so he can stretch his legs. He was an avid listener and would sit for long spells when I read to him too, but then he learned he can move!

I took him to a celebration of a friend's life when he was 2 years and 3 months, he stayed quiet the entire time but moved all around in the pew and on the floor for about an hour, his sister and I then took him outside to run and have a drink and snack for about 15 to 20 minutes, then reentered the church where he promptly popped me in the face. I stood up to take him outside to discipline him and the pastor started the closing prayer so we stayed. Immediately after the prayer as I was trying to take him outside to reprimand him for hitting me 2 moms with babies approached me, (they had been sitting behind us a few rows back) and remarked about how "well-behaved" he was. (My sister asked if they had seen him hit me in the face and they had.) I said, "Are you kidding me?" and they both said no, they had both left their toddlers with sitters because they knew they would have been all over the church.

So, I have to say while I'm hoping and praying he will learn to sit still for longer soon, I'm not holding my breath, he's pretty "normal." And I'm guessing your son is as well.

3 moms found this helpful
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M.R.

answers from Seattle on

50? I'm 51 and still don't sit still unless I'm asleep.

Ditto Kristin....I was surprised to see the words: Toddlers Sitting Still in the same sentence string.

I would sit still in church if my father pinched me or spanked me, but then be completely zoned out due to the stress of having to sit still. I constantly reposition myself, tap my foot, wiggle my toes, phantom type with my fingers, etc.

I recommend you bring a lot of little toys so your son can entertain himself.

3 moms found this helpful
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L.R.

answers from Washington DC on

I think the key word is "expectations." Don't expect more than a child this age -- and he is very young! -- can do. I would not expect a child barely over a year old to sit still for more than a minute or two, especially where there is so much of interest (other people, music in church, books in the library, new spaces to explore).

My daughter was maybe two before she would sit for story time for very long but once she did, if the story was good or there was something hands-on to do afterward, she did well at staying put.

I would hope that any library story time would be geared toward the fact that kids this age move around. If you are getting the evil eye from the reader, or the other parents -- find another, more realistic and more relaxed story time program. He definitely should get out to these programs because that's how kids do learn to pay attention little by little, but don't stress over the fact that you have to stand at the back with him -- that's totally normal for his age!

As for church, is there -- or can you start -- a "children's church" where the kids are in the sanctuary with everyone else only through the first part of the service (opening, first hymn, kids' sermon if your pastor does one) and then the kids who are under a certain age leave the sanctuary for another place in church where someone does age-appropriate activities like active games and crafts? That allows children to get used to being in church but also recognizes their limited attention spans. It lets the kids feel welcome in "grown-up church" but at the same time lets them see church as fun place where they are not being shushed and told to be still for a whole 60 minutes --which is eternity to a toddler. Adults win too, because they get to worhsip with young kids for a time each week, but also get to hear the sermon with some measure of quiet. I really do recommend that you work with other parents in the church to form this kind of program that benefits everyone; the easiest way is to have a roster of parents who take turns leading it, so that all parents have a chance to be in the service without their kids at times and all parents have the responsibility of leading children's church some of the time too.

3 moms found this helpful

L.A.

answers from Austin on

I childs attention span can be calculated by age. 1b minute per year.. so your childs attention span is about 1 minute maybe 2 minutes.. at the most.

When you want your child to be still it will take work on your part. let them stand on your lap. on the floor. Let your child roll cars on the seat. Let your child look at picture books.

May need to sit in back of the church and every 15 minutes take them out to walk a bit.

I think as they get to be about 3 they have a little more control, but it still is about 3 to 4 minutes of attention.

3 moms found this helpful
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R.M.

answers from Cumberland on

When he is a teenager-you will often wonder if he's even going to get out of bed! If a 14 month old could sit still for one hour, I would be concerned.

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L.V.

answers from Dallas on

My little girl is 15 months old, and she LOVES storytime. She doesn't sit still, however. She is paying attention to the story very well, but it's still a wrestling match. LOL My 4.5 yr old sits still for most of storytime, but even she wiggles quite a bit. It's going to be a while. Just embrace it, and count it as your daily exercise. =)

2 moms found this helpful
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H.1.

answers from Des Moines on

My son is 20 months old and struggles as does yours! I can't imagine sitting through a church service, I guess that's why many have nurseries!

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C.T.

answers from Santa Fe on

My daughter is 27 months and she cannot sit still very long at all. She can if she is watching a cartoon. She can sit a bit longer if she is hungry and is eating. But usually she does not last very long yet. Her brother was the same way. I think he started getting much better about sitting at age 3 and a half or 4. I just praise praise praise when they sit for a while at the dinner table. I encourage my daughter to sit longer and will try to distract her at times. Otherwise I do not make a big deal about it. Both my kids are EXTREMELY active. Some kids are more mellow. My little niece will sit and sit and sit...for up to an hour....while she slowly eats food. She is age 2. It's amazing to me b/c neither of my kids ever would do that. My son who is 7 now sits just fine and has for a long time, so I am not worried at all!

2 moms found this helpful

K.M.

answers from Chicago on

Ha, my son is 5 and has NO comprehension ... he is well enough in an afternoon mattenee movie that he WANTS to see but still fidgits. Now, my son does also have ADHD but I still think it is impossible to ask a toddler to sit still unless it is in their personality. I think by 2 you will know for sure if they are a relaxer or a mover. "And this was the same kid that used to sit and listen to me read for 40 minutes at a time before he learned how to crawl!" - sorry but this was BEFORE he understood MOVEMENT yeah I would sit in your lap and hear calming voice for ever but once I could move on my own GOODBYE!

2 moms found this helpful
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A.S.

answers from Atlanta on

We bring a special bag to church each Sunday to help us be quiet in church (that is the best I can hope for.) I have a 7 and 4 year old. This year is the first year I have tried to get the 7 year old involved in parts of the service, but it is still bits and pieces. I remember drawing in church growing up, so I know even I was entertaining myself at an older age in church.
As far as sitting still at other events, I think both of my kids had their first movie going around age 3 and were able to sit through most if not all of the movie. So there are some things they will sit still for as they get older.
But, I would focus on sitting quietly first before focusing on sitting still.

1 mom found this helpful
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G.B.

answers from Dayton on

Closer to 2 you can expect more. Between 1 and 2 is the hardest for places like church. I'd skip story time until he's older - it always seemed like a futile effort. Unless it's for your sanity of course!

1 mom found this helpful
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