Unaccompanied Minor - King George,VA

I recently sent my children, 16 and 11 at the time, to see their Grandparents as unaccompanied minors.

According to my 16 year old, when they had a lay over, they put them in a room in the basement without a door knob to exit. So it is definately safe, but they were treated a bit like prisoners. They sat in that room for 45 minutes until someone came for them. They were ok, they had each oher, but it would be really scary for a child alone.

If you can find a direct flight, I would definately say it is ok. You get to walk him up to the plane and hand them over to a steward. The person on the other end gets to greet him right at the boarding gate. A steward will be with him on the plane.

I was out of my mind worrying while they were in the air, but that was my issue, the kids had fun.

Hope this helps.

I think 8 is way to young! At that age they are just hardly old enough to stay home alone for more than five minutes. I would say maybe eleven maybe ten for staying home by them selves, but for traveling? I would say something older like maybe sixteen or older....That may be a little rational for some people, but even sixteen is questionable. But maybe it is because I would never travel alone...I am eighteen and if I have ever traveled, it was with my family down to florida, up to mass. or accross the bridge to the nearing cities.

i sat next to a girl flying back from Germany unaccompanied. i doubt she was 8 - probably younger. she was fine. so, i think an 8 year old would be fine, especially if he's done the flight before and it's a direct flight with no transfers. the girl i sat next to had a connecting flight in dulles and she was ushered there by flight attendants.

This answer is actually in response to your "what happened" instead of the original request. You made some statements about Southwest Airlines that I do not believe to be entirely true. I am not sure where you got your information, I am assuming from the media (newspaper, tv report, etc.). I think it is important to remember that there are two sides to every story & while some of the facts that the media reports may or may not be true, there are also some very important facts that were left out, which would make the story have a completely different ending, not to mention that there may still be an ongoing investigation. With this in mind I think it is very important to not make statements that you don't know to be entirely true. I think researching companies to find out information about them is a great idea, however you might want to research the source that that information is coming from also. Just food for thought...

I would never let my 8 year old fly alone. 8 year milestones listed on WWW state that they love being around their family. I would cite "experts" in writing and refuse to comply. Your ex may just want to displace your relatives and cause trouble for you. Seeing "his" son as his only, and jealous of the other maternal relatives. My 12 year old daughter may fly out to visit her sister, Washington to Kansas, but we are very concerned about procedures and still thinking about escorting her. Some people's business is stealing, exploiting children, your ex needs to understand that.

If you feel your son is too young, then he is. You know him better than anyone else. You have an agreement in place. If dad doesn't want to abide tell him to get the agreement changed. Note to him it'll cost him more to go to court to change agreement then it would to foot the bill!!! I would also note to him I am so happy that you are willing to put the security of our son in jeopardy because you are cheap!!!!!

If your son is mature for 8, I would say yes as long as it's a direct flight - no stops or layovers. I let my daughter (who is now 24 fly from Belgium to Philly) by herself. The flight attendants were WONDERFUL and she was in the front next to them the whole flight and they didn't let her leave until her grandparents showed their photo ID and copy of the letter of permission to pick up my daughter.

In MY OPINION your ex is being a jerk. Ask if they are having financial troubles and THAT's why he doesn't want to pay or what?

Most airlines are GREAT for unaccompanied minors - truly - the flight attendants keep a good eye on them.

I'm sure this isn't the answer you wanted - but I do understand your apprehension for letting him fly by himself. Talk to the airlines to find out what they do for unaccompanied minors.

Give your son a 'pay as you go' cell phone so he can call you from the plane before it departs and when it lands if this is the route you decide to go.

Best regards,

Cheryl

Please don't think I'm a bad Mom! My son started flying to his dad's when he was 6. An unaccompanied minor is always with an adult employee the entire time. They have taken extremely good care of him and we have never had a bad experience with it. When you make the reservation you have to state that he will be an unaccompanied minor and you will pay extra for the ticket. You also need identification proving you are his guardian before they will release him to you or your exhusband. Which means posession of his birth certificate, or a report card with his name on it. They do check and they do take their time with it.
Of coarse, the decision is up to you, but I thought I would give you another point of view,. And yes, the first time was very hard for me! That was my baby!

My daughter has flown as an unaccompanied minor to see her dad 2-3x a year since she was 5 (she will be 10 this summer). Her flight is about 2 hours each way.
There are THOUSANDS of kids that fly as unaccompanied minors each week beginning at age 5. Aside from a 1 or 2 instances of a kid getting on the wrong flight in the last 10 years (out of tens of thousands) travel as an unaccompanied minor is EXTREMELY safe. A parent/guardian goes with the child to the gate, where they are 'turned over' to one of the flight attendants who are in charge of the child for the ENTIRE flight. The other parent must meet the flight at the arrival gate and the flight attendant can't leave the arrival gate until the designated person arrives and shows ID to pick up the child.

Each airline has their own criteria for establishing when a minor can fly with an "option" to pay the unaccompanied minor fee. If you go on the website of the airline of your choice you will be able to get their specific policies. We fly American, so I only know about them, but I think all the airlines are all similar. Basically, a child aged 5-14 must fly with another passenger who is at least 15. If there is not a 2nd passenger who meets the criteria then they are determined to be an "unaccompanied minor", and a fee is required for them to fly (there are some additional restrictions on which flights they can fly etc).

The UM fee is not optional. When you book a flight for a child 14 yrs old or younger you are required to pay the fee (fee can be paid at the time of ticket purchase or by each parent when they check their child in at the airport). When the child is 15-17 the UM fee is optional. They will not let a child on the plane without the fee being paid. You can try to lie about his age, but when you show their ID at check-in they will deny boarding.

This is not negotiable and it's not something you have to go back to court for. It is simply airline policy. You can have your son's dad call the airline and inquire if he is argumentative with you. The airlines will tell him that he will not be allowed to board the plane without an accompanied "guardian" or paying the fee. With American the fee is $100 each way (plus the $20 booking fee since you can't book on-line). They will add it right to the ticket.

You can let your son's dad know that if he doesn't want to adhere to the FAA travel guidelines, then in order to exercise his visitation with his son he will have to come to VA.

PS - the first time you put him on the plane you will be a wreck. I cried until I heard her voice on the other end of the phone once she arrived. But it's just like everything else, it gets easier each time. He will be safe, and will probably have a ball - the airline attendants & pilot totally cater to my daughter - she loves it! Good luck.

Dear D.: I feel that your ex is out of his tree. I don't know about your States laws but here in Ontario they can't even be left alone at home any more than 2hrs. and that cutting it. I would be telling your ex he has a long way to wait for his son to travel safely until the age of 12. That would be my answer and if he doesn't like it, well back to court it is. I would say he's not going. I'm sure if you called the Childrens' Aide Office (or whatever name they go by where you are) would likely write you a letter stating that your son is not of the appropriate age to travel alone. Even a Justice of the Peace would do this for you. With everything going on flying now, what would your son do if something happened. I'm sure if you were to go out and leave him unattended for a short time, at least he is able to contact you. On a plane, who is he to contact. Yes there are stuartists' etc. but that certainly isn't enough. Call your lawyer that you dealt with as well, I am sure he as well would disagree with what your ex wants. He is out of his tree, I'm sorry but he's not thinking of any negative issues' that may go on. I'm not saying they would however, how would you feel if something did. You are making the right move. If he wants to see his son that badly he will put out the money, if not his son stays home. I'm sure if you told him you were taking him back to court he would back off, especially if you told them what he wanted done. They would laugh in his face. Good luck, and I am happy for you that at least your thinking of your son, because he is NOT!!

Eight years old is way too young to travel alone. Most, if not all airlines have rules about that. I belive the airlines won't let a child travel alone until they are 12. Check it out.

Hi D.,

This is quite a frustrating issue. Personally, I would not allow my child at 8 yrs old to fly unaccompanied. However, sometimes things get complicated in a divorce, and we have to make decisions that we don't want to.Since the court order states that you are both responsible for half of all travel costs, I believe this puts him in contempt, which is another messy issue. My hubby has a daughter from a previous relationship who lives in Las Vegas, and we are in Idaho. She flies unaccompanied through Southwest Airlines, and it works well. She is actually accompanied personally, by a stewardess, and hand delivered to the receiving parent. That being said, we are only 3 hours away, by flight, and we are able to get her non-stop flights. I doubt this would be the case with your son, being that you are quite a distance from eachother. Her mother is also responsible for half of all travel costs, but we get stuck with the whole bill every time. IT'S A LOT OF FUN!!!! The only thing I could suggest is that maybe you could arrange for childcare for the other children while you fly with your son to Oregon.

K.

have you considered meeting your ex. half way ? there has to be a middle point, right ? that way, you both have to travel but only half as far. thats fair to everyone.
K. h.

First of all, I think that your ex. is being unreasonable and uncaring about your situation. Unfortunately, dads are much more liberal in their childcare opinions. They worry about raising "wimps" or coddling the child. My ex. and I have had our major disagreements over his child care beliefs. An 8 year old is too young to be traveling without a guardian. I know because I asked our children's psychiatrist, (my sons are mentally disabled) who told me that no child under the age of at least 10 should be left unattended, and then only for one hour matching the last digit of their age, ie. 1 hour for an 11 year old, 2 for a twelve year old, etc. What if there was major turbulance, or some other scare? I know that I would not want my 8 year old to be alone and scared! It sounds like his dad needs to think about his wallet less and the well-being of his child more! The doctor is B. Kishore Gupta in Louisville, KY if you want to look him up and get his opinion, or one of the other's there for yourself. Hope this helps!

I'm EXTREMELY protective, and my son flew unaccompanied to visit my stupid ex from the time he was 5. He was completely comfortable with it, so that helped, even though I hated to do it every time. They have flight attendants to watch and help your child the whole time, and stay with them until they are picked up at the other end. If I remember correctly you pay extra for the unaccompanied minor.

Your son is seriously fine to travel alone at age 8.

We moved away from all family three years ago and our only daughter (age 9) spends the month of July with grandparents and aunts. It's an hour flight direct and this is the first year we began to consider sending her alone. We have decided against it because my husband (who's a police officer) and myself (A social worker) were not 100% comfortable so as I began discussing with our daughter what she would do if the person sitting next to her made her uncomfortable or asked to touch her what would she do? She then got nervous and we made the decision to fly her up.

The short answer to your question is there is no "magic age". It depends on the child's AND parent's level of comfort, length of flight, etc.

A cross country flight is a long time to be "independent". The air attendants will "keep an eye" on the child, but they don't sit with them...so the child is on his own if the flight gets bumpy or scary or to handle seatmates, keep themself entertained etc.

IF I had to "pick an age" when I think it is appropriate to send a child on a cross country flight I would say 13...that is the about the age you would begin to consider leaving your child alone for that period of time at home...but again it depends on development and maturity.

Tough situation...good luck! If needed refer back to the court! Let them make the decision!

I see you're already decided, but I wanted to mention something that wasn't reflected in the first page or so of comments I scanned.

More so than 'inappropriate touching' on the plane itself, is the very real situation where the plane may need to set down early for mechanical issues, medical emergencies, or security concerns. Lately, these are not rare occurrences, and the longer a flight is, the more of a chance that if the plane did have to set down mid-flight, your son would be stranded somewhere that you and your ex could not reach easily.

A cross-country flight is pretty long and he could be stuck in Peoria at a time with no other flights in the right direction. In that kind of situation, the flight attendants have other serious concerns and may not keep your son in mind - your son should be old enough to deal with that kind of situation himself. IMHO, an 8yo is not - I would probably say the youngest age would be 13/14. A boy going through puberty also has some growth on him to have some 'presence', be less appealing to child predators, and can speak up for himself to strange adults.

I also love the idea of giving him a prepaid cell phone while traveling so that he has an independent means of contacting you.

Airlines WILL let children under 12 travel alone--just fyi. Somebody said they didn't.

I agree with the moms who said it would have to be a direct flight, and that it depends on the kid. Some 8 yr old kids would be terrified; others would be thrilled that mom thought they were responsible. Don't underestimate the value of teaching your child some independence--just a thought to throw into the mix. Another thing to consider is how comfortable your child is with airplanes. My kids have flown a lot and they know, for instance, that air turbulence is just bumps--not a prelude to a crash. A kid who hasn't flown might be totally freaked out.

I sent my 10 year old daughter to Atlanta on her own from Washington DC on a direct flight and she was perfectly fine. You get a special gate pass from the ticket agent and you walk your child to the gate, and then my sister was able to meet her at the gate. On the return trip, you can get a similar gate pass to meet your child at the gate. I didn't realize that, and waited at the security desk for disembarking passengers. Then my cellphone rang: she was at the gate, waiting for me, all alone. The flight attendants had just walked off. I wasn't happy about that part, but if I'd been up on the rules, it wouldn't have happened. When you think about this, realize the plane trip itself is the least of it--the whole issue is what happens at the airport. Once your child is on the plane, he/she ain't going anywhere, and chances are some kindly adult will look after him. Nice folks outnumber perverts in the real world by about 100 to 1 (though I know child molesters do exist). I find it hard to imagine a situation where some strange adult would engage in inappropriate touching on an airplane. Talk about a quick route to the slammer! These days most seats are three across and 99.9 percent of people on airplanes are spending all their time figuring out how NOT to touch other people.

Oh--almost forgot: airlines also charge (or did, a couple of sumemrs ago) an "unaccompanied minor" fee, supposedly to cover their extra trouble of looking after your kid. (Yeah, right.) Mine was $100, and this was on Delta.

So don't rule it out; just think through it step by step, talk to your child, and you'll reach the right decision.

I agree with you all the way!!!!!! My hubby and I have had this conversation a few times over the years. I would NEVER send my kid on a plane by himself. It seems selfish that half of your marriage feels he can dictate what is considered safe because of money. Marriage and parenting are both based on comprimise and you both should decide what is best for your childen.

I've never done this myself or with my son, but I know my son. He is in no way able to remember to tie his shoes at age 6 almost 7, and there is no way I would send him anywhere without a known individual with him (me, dad, grandparent, etc.) You have to know whether your child is mature enough, at whatever age. Some 5 year olds are remarkably mature, and some 10 year olds can't pay attention to anything important. Use your best judgement, explain your decision to your ex, and if he still has an issue, go to the courts. Good luck!

.

D.,
I'm sure many 8yr olds fly every day and nothing happens to them. However, my fear would be things like weather and mechanical delays. If his plane was delayed for weather what assurance do you have that he wouldn't spend the night alone in an airport? My friends travels from Maryland to New York to see her father. This is the first year she traveled unaccompanied and she is almost 15.

I see no harm in waiting a couple more years before sending your son unaccompanied.

The real issue here seems to be "who is in charge." It appears that you and your ex-husband are having a power struggle over travel. That needs to be work out so your son doesn't feel like he's in tug of war.
Good luck.
K.

just to reiterate what a few moms have already said: if he wants to change the agreement, he can pay to go to court to do so. until then, if he wants to see his son then he needs to abide by the agreement, which means paying half of his son's ticket and half of the costs for the accompanying adult. in advance, if you're having trust issues regarding getting paid back....
good luck.

It sounds to me like your working around your ex's schedual and thats just not right if he wants to see his kid he needs to make the effort and go and see him...unless this is something you really want for him...in that case you can send him by himself on a plane but is cost an extra 100 bucks because he will need to be watched by a flight attendant I know this b/c my mom wants to fly my kids to MI to stay with her for a couple weeks this summer my kdis are 10,8,7

My son, now 10, started flying unaccompanied at age 5. He flies about twice a year unaccompanied and LOVES it. Depending on the airline, there are age restrictions when they allow children to make connecting flights. Some airlines only allow direct or "through" flights (one or more stops but no change of planes). Many airlines don't allow unaccompanied minors to change airlines during their travels. Southwest, for example, will not allow any minor (5 - 11) to change planes and they are never allowed to fly on the last flight of the day. On US Airways, a child must be at least 15 years old to take a flight with a connection.

When a child is flying alone you are given a special pass at check-in which allows you to get thru security and wait at the gate with your child until your child is on the plane and has taken off...on the receiving end...whomever is picking up your child is given the same pass to get thru security and is waiting at the gate when your child arrives. They verify, with a drivers license, that the person picking up your child is the one listed on the information you provided them when dropping you child off at origin airport.

The answer to your question...YES, I would allow my 8 year old to fly unaccompanied!!!

I would have a judge make a ruling. If you have to go out there to see the judge this time then fine. I personally would not let my 8 yo fly by themselves.

I don't that I would be comfortable until about age 12. Of course, it depends on the kid.

However, I don't think your ex has a choice about paying. Do the orders say anything about an age limit for the accompanying adult? It isn't fair for him to pay the cost of your other child, but certainly for you and your son.

It sounds like he is trying to manipulate the situation to make YOU look like the bad guy...but he's trying to avoid the visitation!

By the way, you don't need any sort of travel consent within the US...only when you travel international. I've been travelling alone with my daughter since she was 8 weeks old and never been asked for so much as a birth certificate.

It really depends on the child. Is your child responsible? Is he good at remembering where he needs to go and stuff? If he's gone a lot with you, and it's a direct flight, I think it would probably be ok.

That being said, if it's in the custody agreement, your ex cant just decide not to do it without changing the custody agreement. Talk to your lawyer and see what he recommends.

I would allow my 8 year old to fly alone if it was 1) a direct flight 2) I got to take him to the security check point where someone from the airline met us and took him to his gate and 3) an airline attendant escorted him out to where the other parent was meeting him. I would need to send a cell phone with him so he could text me that he was safely at the gate, on the plane, landed safely, met other parent etc. I also would have the gps tracking activated on the phone so that I could track where he was. And that would only be the case if he was a responsible kid. That would be my requirements pretty much until high school when they wouldn't need an accompanying attendant but would have to text me all the time.

Well, I wouldn't. I was hesitant to let him fly by himself when he was 14. Since his dad had never exercised his custody, then started, I had to let him fly, but the papers stated that it had to be a non-stop flight. I put him on as an unaccompanied minor & his dad was soooo thoughtful for my concern that he was late picking him up. My son had to wait at the gate for an hour & this is in New York!!! Then his dad didn't pay the extra fee for my son to come back as an unaccompanied minor & I was livid. Regardless of their age, there are too many crazy people out there. It worked out that he didn't have to go again because in the winter, they don't do non-stop flights & his father was unwilling to drive a few hours extra to pick him up on a direct flight, so I didn't have to send him. You aren't going to tell me that they are accompanied the whole time. It's only like $30.00 extra & they just watch them, they don't stay with them the whole time. That is my experience & I think 8 is too young. Besides, it's in your court papers, so unless he takes you back to change them, he's stuck.

I flew by myself to my grandmothers from age 5-15. Never had a problem. I loved it! The stewardess would bring me out to my grandma and check her ID before I was able to go with her. If you do allow him to fly by himself, you will be worried though. I would be too. I have an 8 and 13 year old so if I had to put them on a plane, I would be nervous the first time too,even though I would know everything would be okay. But what M. wouldnt worry........ that is normal!. It would get better and better when he does it more often.

You have received some good answers to your questions. I will add my knowledge as a travel agent and mom.

The airlines do allow children as young as 5 to fly unaccompanied as long as it is a nonstop flight and it not the last flight of the day. They also charge an unaccompanied minor fee usually around $100 each direction.

When you check your child in at the airport you will have to fill out several forms one of which is who is meeting/picking up your child at their destination. This person will need to have id because they will ask to see it.

You will be given a gate pass to go thru security with your child until he is taken onto the plan at boarding by an airline representative. Generally unaccompanied are seated towards the front of the plane and the flight attendants check on them periodically.

When the flight lands at the destination the person picking up will also have been allowed a gate pass so that they can be at the gate when the plane started letting passengers debark. Again a flight attendant or airline representative will lead the child off the plane and hand them physically over to the correct person.

I, personally, allowed my 2 children to fly back and from from DFW airport to Washington Dulles airport for the past 5 years roughly. I never had any issue with the unaccompanied minor sytem. My kids are now 19 and 16 and are very comfortable in the airport and with flying in general.

Not sure if this helps but am hoping it does and if I can answer any further questions, please feel free to contact me.

No way!! Too young. I would be a complete & nervous wreck the whole time & God forbide something happen to ex & he doesn't show up to pick up your son for what ever reason then you have an 8 yr old alone in the hands of strangers miles away. nope, nope, nope. My question is this....is your ex putting your son on a plane alone to come back home to you? I would not be ok with that either. What if your son ends up in a seat next to a perv. -- no wouldn't do it.

No I wouldn't.
Not at all.
You have to get this solved in the courts.
AND, if a child travels... you have to have permission papers and have it signed by BOTH parents. Even 1 parent traveling with a minor, has to have travel permission papers signed AND notarized. At least that is what we had to do when my Hubby traveled with my daughter by plane, and that is what the Travel Agent told us. (this was for international travel. But, I would think its just as important within the US.)
It is called "Travel Consent Forms" or "Travel Parental Consent Forms" etc., You can look it up online, and print them out as well.
Here is a link:
http://www.google.com/search?q=travel+consent+forms&i...

You have to have this accounted for... and both parties work it out in court. AND the orders as it is, says that BOTH parents have to pay for half the travel costs for your son and the accompanying adult. Right?
So your Ex has to abide by that.

I would not allow any of my kids to travel by themselves. Not now and not until they are legal age themselves. AND I feel they are wise enough and mature enough.

all the best,
Susan

Sounds to me like th ex is in contempt of court

In my experience it is illegal to allow a child to travel unaccompanied until they are 15 years old. You must pay a fee of $100 so that an airline employee can fly with your son when he boards the plane, stay with him if and when there is a layover and accompanies him to the awaiting party who must have the same creditendials i.e. your husband must have id to present. So my sugguestion is to split the cost 50/50. Play nice with him even though its hard sometimes but if it doesnt work file a stating it's a hardship and that you have the solution to split transportation and tried to come to an agreement but he refuses. Of course only if he refuses. Try sending him a text, email, written correspondence and verbal so that you have all your ducks in a row and he can't deny he refused in court. good luck wish you the best ~ S.

It's been 20 years now, but my niece came to visit me when she was 5. She came home with me, but flew home alone. The stewards and stewardesses take their jobs very seriously and would take excellent care of your son. He is in a confined space and pretty easy to keep track of. Your ex-husband better make sure he has all his ducks in a row when he goes to pick up your son, though, or they won't release him to your ex. My sister forgot her driver's license in the car and had to go all the way back to get it before they'd release my niece to her. In today's economy, it's the only way to go, unless your ex foots the bill...

First of all, unlewss he goes back to court and gets it changed legally, he is still required to pay for two tickets. Secondly, I ABSOLUTELY agree with you, in an earlier time (when I was a kid) I would have said no problem, but in today's world, no way. He may be mature enough, but he is no where strong enough to defend himself against predators that look for these kids. Even predators take planes sometimes. While they say that they will keep a close eye on your child, the reality is that they have an entire plane to watch, they are looking for terrorists and can't always watch unaccompanied minors. I have a 14, that will not travel by himself due to medical concerns, a 12yo who is a blue belt in Tae Kwon Do and a 7 yo, who can beat her brothers many days. I would never consider sending any of them cross country until the younger my younger son is at least 15 or 16. I hope that this helps, and I hope that he reconsiders.

First, if you have it in the visitation agreement that he has to pay half the cost for your son and the accompanying adult and he is now refusing to do that, take him back to court to get it enforced by the court. If he has a job, and isn't paying what he is supposed to in your custody agreement, the court will garnish his wages and make sure that you get the money. Because he is the one not abiding by the agreement, if your attorney is any good, he will also have to pay all court costs and attorney fees as well as having to comply with the original agreement.
Second, my sons started flying cross country as unaccompanied minors at ages 7 & 8. There is an additional fee (per trip, not plane change per the FAA), and until age 13 it has to be a direct flight (no plane changes) from one airport to another. My sons enjoyed these flights and flying unaccompanied gave them a lot of independence. The drawback is you would want to send him on an airline where he has a reserved seat, as opposed to boarding on his own, and that means it would be a bit more expensive. Make sure that the airline follows the rules, asks the receiving party for ID, has a designated person for unaccompanied minors, and has a plan in place for unaccompanied minors in cases of emergency. The airline needs all sorts of additional information, so make sure that everyone knows what the plans are for both parts of the journey. I don't know how it is flying unaccompanied since 9/11, but when you check in, make sure that airline provides you with someone to accompany you son from security screening to the gate or to issue you a pass to allow you to take him to the gate yourself. Be advised, you may not get to accompany your son to the gate (because you don't have a ticket) and that the airline needs to provide someone to come get him at the checkpoint, if they don't let you go him with him since he is an unaccompanied minor. Do not turn your child over to anyone from TSA, you are paying the airline the extra fee to see your son's safety, so if you hand your son off to someone else, it releases them from that liability.
Last, be advised that you will worry the entire trip from the first one until the last one. Eventually, it will get easier, but you will still worry. We are mothers, it is what we do. My sons' last flight together as unaccompanied minors was the only one that had an issue where the plane had to be re-routed, and because they had been doing this for so long, they handled it all better than I did. They knew who to call, who to talk to at the airline, where to go for help making other arrangements. They didn't have their own cell phones then, so a lot of it was through a pay phone or a courtesy phone at the airport, but even as teens they knew the routine well enough that they could work from their end toward a resolution of the situation, while I worked from my end. They ended up arriving with quite a tale to tell of their side of the adventure about all of the wonderful people who help them finish the trip to see their Mom.

No, I think that is too young.
I looked up on Southwest Airlines what they have to say about this:
From age 5-12 kids can travel by them selves -registered as unaccompanied. This particular exception did catch my eye: "Unaccompanied Minors are allowed to travel on only nonstop or same-plane service (makes one or two stops but does not require a change of planes or flight number). " Depending on where you are flying to/from this may be impossible.
(And to me this is reasonable. What happens if the flight is delayed enough to miss the connection - who is responsible for the child then?)

(Here is the link to where I found this: http://www.southwest.com/travel_center/childtip.html#terms )

While this is specific for Southwest, it would surprise me if the other airlines did not also have similar rules.
Citing this kind of information to your ex may help him be more reasonable. Best of luck, and I hope this helps.