Want to Get Pregnant-but I Am Dialysis Patients

You said that you needed a frank opinion, here it is: at 45 the chances for you to conceive a healthy child with your own eggs are minimal if you are perfectly healthy.
I know women don't usually go around openly and telling everybody, but I personally happen to know a lot of "very late moms" (first child between 45 and 50) and almost all of them went with donor eggs and all of them did IVF. Those celebrities that have a baby in their 40'ies, I will bet you that 95% of them did donor eggs and/or IVF.
No self respecting doctor would consider you as a patient for IVF, if you were to get pregnant with your health problems, you would likely be advised to terminate. Something around 1% of dialysis patients are able to get pregnant and only a small fraction of those pregnancies even make it to the second trimester - often at great cost for the moms health.

I do understand the wish to have a child, but you should really look at other avenues. Maybe foster care? Maybe foster to adopt, which is more affordable than a private adoption or surrogacy?
Getting pregnant is only worth it if you actually get to live to raise your baby...

time to consider adoption, foster care, surrogates.

It isnt really safe for you or a baby. sorry

I am sorry for your heartache, but it is NOT recommended for dialysis patients to get pregnant. It's very difficult to conceive if on dialysis, and it's usually very hard to conceive at age 45. Many pregnancies that do hapoen on dialysis end in miscarriage and the few remaining in premature birth. It's very dangerous for you and the baby! Please consider adoption or a surrogate. You should speak to your doctor about this as well, but it is not a good idea. Good luck! There are many ways to have a family and have children!

You need to have an open conversation with your doctor at this point. Although it may be very hard to hear and accept, it sounds as though your body cannot achieve and sustain a pregnancy. Look at all of those factors and the simple fact that you have been trying for 21 years. In your heart you know the answer. You need to hear it, though, from your doctor.

Please seek out help, both medical and a support group if necessary to work through this.

Unless the moms here responding are doctors, I wouldn't look to this site for specific medical advice. Talk to your doctor(s) about this. I wish you all the best!

My honest opinion, is you have no business trying to be pregnant, with the physical ailments you have. I'm not a Dr. You shouldn't listen to me. See a Dr. about this now. You are an advanced maternal age and in poor health. Only a Dr. can appropriately asses your situation.

In all honesty you should not try to get pregnant. With your health conditions it is almost certain that your fetus will not survive and neither will you. With the time needed for dialysis treatments, whether you are on hemodialysis or peritoneal, is restrictive and draining financially. Talk to your nephrologist...but at your age and your health it is a bad idea for all involved.

Start thinking about WHY you want to be pregnant, the deepest most honest reason. Do you feel that pregnancy is something YOU have to do? or is it you want a child? There are other options out there. Good luck.

I can't imagine what you are going through, but I did watch my own mother sufffer through kidney failure, dialysis, and a transplant. Dialysis was SO hard on her. I can't imagine making yourself ill to carry a baby. You need to think about your own health.

If you are determined to have a baby, why not focus on the end result? The beautiful baby? There are so many ways to do it w/out risking your own health. I say this with the utmost sensitivity b/c I know how strongly women want to carry their child. There are so many ways, adoption, surrogacy.

I wish you the best of luck in whatever you do, but please don't forget about you!!! Keep yourself healthy and the rest will fall into place. I wish you the best of luck!!!

Having a child has been very important to you, but with your medical condition I would advise against you becoming pregnant. Pregnancy complications are another concern. Granted you made a major mistake in stopping your BP medications and yes HBP does affect your kidneys, even when you take meds you must continually get checked at least once a year to make sure your kidneys are doing well

Have you and your husband considered adopting? There are many children who would love to have a place they could call home and caring parent. Think about this and I wish the best for you and your husband.

Honestly, I don't think getting pregnant is a wise move at this point. If you were not able to have a baby when you were younger, then you have even less of a chance of having one at your age. If you did become pregnant, you have health problems that could really be disasterous for you, your baby or both. Have you considered adoption?

This really should be a conversation had with your doctor. I wish you all the best!

You need to ask your Doctor. ONLY go by what your Doctor says.
NO one here, can tell you the answer to this.

You should have a Renal Doctor, and a Primary Care Physician, per the health problems you listed.
Ask them.

Or adopt a baby? If you cannot have your own.

Being on dialysis and being pregnant, can be very complicated.
And you do NEED your medications.
Or your own life can be in danger.

This is a conversation for you and your doctor. Dialysis is very hard on a person and I can't imagine doing it while pregnant. There are so many other options and a child doesn't have to be biological. I wish you the best of luck and peace with whatever decision you make.

Pregnancy is hard enough on you when you have 2 healthy kidneys functioning.
I can not imagine the stress on your body when you need to pee for 2 and your kidneys don't work.
I would think the toxins might build up too quickly and that would be bad for you and the baby.
With your health issues, even taking care of a child through foster care or adoption would be a big strain on you.

T.:

While I sympathize with you - I do NOT believe you should be trying to get pregnant...you are not healthy enough to sustain a pregnancy...

I would try to adopt instead of getting pregnant. Being pregnant is VERY hard on a healthy body - and yours is not in great shape (sorry to be mean) I don't think it would be in your best health interest to have a pregnancy...

Seriously - try adopting...it doesn't take blood to make you a mom.

I agree with others, you will need to consult your dr..IMO only it is very risky to have a baby while on dialysis and your age will also make it much more risky and trying...would you ever consider adoption, there are lots of babies needing homes.

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I think that a fertility doc could give you the best information about the chances of carrying a baby. I think they could give you all the information that is available for your health issues and your age. My BF had her last child at nearly 50, she had children long before, he kids are adults and have children. She married again and then had 2 kids. She has MS and with the proper medical treatment was able to have the babies with minimal health risk to them or to her. It takes a doc that knows what he is doing and how to go about doing it. Good luck.