WWYD: Nanny Is Pregnant

I think it's important to look at what your agreement was with her, and what you have written down in an employment contract - which it sounds like you have.

It's important not to assume details about what a pregnant woman can and can't do, or what she would do if she had a child. Women fought for years to not be asked these questions by employers or prospective employers - so even if your nanny had a child, you cannot assume that she wouldn't come to work or that she would bring her own child with her (as suggested below).

I'd talk to her ONLY about her ability to carry out the job responsibilities outlined in your agreement: traveling, how requests for time off would be handled, etc. I would NOT ask her when she is due or how much maternity leave she would be taking or what her own day care plans are. I don't think that's legal. You might consult an employment lawyer to see how to proceed once you get answers, and how to go about getting those answers in a legal, non-discriminatory way. You have time, apparently.

I get your concerns - I think you are an employer, however, and you have to tread carefully.

I encourage you to take the long view here. There is a short (in the scheme of life) window in which she will not be able to travel, and there are work-arounds for this (get a temp nanny while she takes a maternity leave or let your nanny stay home and for a few trips contract with a nanny on-site at the location - I've done this and every big city has nanny services that you could vet). To me, the big question is this: Are you OK with her watching your baby and her baby together, once the baby arrives (assuming this is what she has in mind)? I know people who had this situation and it worked just fine for them, but it is a matter of personal preference for you.

Give it some thought and if you know, for sure, that you want a nanny ONLY watching your child, then the travel question is a moot point.

If she's really good and you don't mind if she brings her baby to your house, then I suggest that you should think through the short-term inconvenience with the goal of making things work long-term. After all, wouldn't you want the same from your own employer?

ETA: After reading some other responses, I stand by my advice with respect to things you might think through before doing or saying anything; however, I also agree with the very practical advice given by others of making sure you understand what you legally can and cannot say to her before you approach her.

Talk to her about it. Tell her you appreciate all the work she has done up to now, but that you think you will eventually need to find a new nanny. It should not come as a surprise to her. She obviously knows what she signed as part of her work contract, so ask her what she plans to do about traveling now that she is pregnant. I assume she will be able to travel for a few months, maybe until her 7th or 8th month of pregnancy, and then, she will have to step down and have someone else fill her position.

seems pretty obvious, don't you think?
khairete
S.

How pregnant? Like, was she actually pregnant when she started and failed to disclose it to you (and possibly lying now about how far along she is)? I don't know that you could have used her pregnancy "against" her, but clearly it would a) be deceptive if she did, and b) she stated she was fit to handle the role of nanny who would need to fly and now she can't.

Personally, I'd speak with an employment attorney to discuss letting her go. Otherwise, what will do you when she decides that she doesn't want to fly after 24 weeks due to some other health issue (or just personal reasons)? That could not only impact your job, but also your children's ability to travel with you. I don't think I would let someone have that much impact on my life - to the point that neither home nor work would be stable.

I know that it isn't fair. Life isn't fair. However, my kids and job come before someone else's kids and job. She made the choices she made - you need to make the choices you need to make.

Good luck, finding a nanny is hard enough without this hassle.

Sounds like you need to replace her.
I realize people start their families at any time - but when I'm paying someone to look after my kid(s) - I want them looking after MY kid(s).

Additional:
Texas - like Virginia - is an at will employment state.
That means an employer can fire for any reason or no reason at all unless there's a clause in your contract that states you can not terminate unless you have a good reason.

Like Diane says below - you can ask her in a straightforward way about her plans for whatever time period is the term of your agreement ("the next nine months", if it is a one-year contract and she is 3 months in). But keep in mind, no one can know for certain - her doctor might confine her to bedrest tomorrow, and there would be no way anyone could have known that in advance. And really, something like that could happen to a not-pregnant person too!

It is understandable that you would want some advance notice (as opposed to one day booking a business trip and finding out last-minute that she is no longer allowed to fly), but she might sincerely be planning/hoping on "not letting pregnancy slow her down".

Tread carefully with your questions and hire a lawyer to help if you are concerned.

I agree with others below that if you have a legal contract with her, you need to tread carefully so you don't end up with her claiming you are discriminating.

She may be able to work (including flying and traveling with you) for some months to come; however, a poster below makes the very good point that she may be ordered to bed rest, or she could develop high blood pressure or gestational diabetes or anything else that might affect her ability to travel. Any of these things could happen very suddenly, leaving you with travel plans, an infant and no care (I'm figuring here that dad can't provide care or isn't in the picture or works a job that means the baby has to travel with you, hence the need for the traveling nanny--?).

So I would absolutely take your job agreement to an attorney who specializes in employment issues and who has preferably handled some issues involving nannies or other home-based help before. Ask the attorney to look at the agreement or contract and advise you. Personally I would want to know if I could start looking for a new nanny to take over for a period of months while your nanny is on maternity leave, as with any other job, but who also could be available for travel. That may be asking too much, though. If the nanny has been on the job only three months it might be easier to replace her altogther, but you may not be able to do that easily if she could claim you were discriminating.

Depending on what the attorney tells you, you might want to talk to her about the idea that in a pregnancy, she could end up unable to travel quite suddenly, even if she's perfectly healthy right now. Come back and let us know what the lawyer says and what happens.

Why does her being pregnant have anything to do with her ability to do her job?

If she can't do the job as specified you will have to replace her of course.

Be careful. You cannot discriminate against someone because they are pregnant. Yes, Texas is an employment at will state, but that DOES NOT MEAN you can terminate someone willie nillie. She could still sue you and probably win if she said you fired her because she got pregnant. So be careful there.

So, you need to discuss with her your upcoming travel plans. You don't know for sure she can't travel you are making assumptions. Not good. If you have a trip scheduled tell her the dates and that you expect her to come. If she says she can't, THEN you can discuss this with her. Traveling is a condition of her employment. I would recommend talking to am employment attorney for guidance. It would be worth the consult fee.

I think you have to be careful you don't just end her employment because she's pregnant, if she can still do her job.

So long as she can travel (if that's a job requirement and clearly outlined), I would think you wouldn't have reason to terminate her.

Certainly line someone else up for when she is no longer able to work. I think that's what I would do. You could have some overlap if necessary - for a couple of weeks so your baby gets used to new nanny and that way if your current one should need to go off early (due to complications, etc.) you're covered.

In some cases, employers/nannies work out arrangements for when they are ready to come back to work. You don't mention that - so not sure how long she's worked for you (I'm assuming 5 months). I'm going to guess you'd rather just start fresh with a new nanny once you move on.