G.B.
First of all, I hope that mamas who breastfeed as I did, take heart that it is not necessarily because of breastfeeding that their babies want them during the night! Some kids are just this way!
Having said that, some kids aren't ready to get themselves thru the night alone until they're older - often much older than Samantha. Crying it out is just cruel - I agree with you on that. Obviously, many will disagree.
This is why many families have their little ones in their room with them, either in their bed or nearby - so everyone can get some sleep. She will one day either sleep better or find a way to get through it without your continual involvement, but that's not now. She needs you to help her even if you may never really know why. It is what it is, and there are many families who have similar, or worse, situations, no matter what you may hear. If you comfort, feed, are present, or whatever, it's all good stuff you are investing in her. It is, of course, highly inconvenient and annoying, but parenting is not for cowards, and is a 24x7 job regardless of what some books may have you believe.
It sounds like you're doing a great job with a tough situation. hang in there, A.. You will survive. Good for you for making the hard decision to stay home. You'll never regret it. Over time, these glitches will work out. Rest a bit during the day if you can while she's in this stage, possibly a very long stage, and try to make as little of it as possible with her. Take it in stride and be rather offhand about what you need to do for her. If she sense you're upset, it will make it worse and it will last longer - believe me.