5 Year Old Will Not Sleep in His Room

My 5 year old wouldn't sleep in his room either but when I bought a night light for his room; he started sleeping in there with no problems.

We had the same problem with our son at 5 years old too when we had our daughter, he is now 7 and daughter is 2. What we did is ask him what would make him more comfortable in his room. For our son...it was ALOT but it worked. Heres what we did. The first and main important thing is SET A ROUTINE which i did not have at first. Our routine is clean up toys, bath, brush teeth, tuck in bed- talk about the day and then story time and then kisses. Second, Take away all stimulating "things" from his room, like TV's and computers. Make sure all Toys were out of site at/or before bedtime. Then we got a sleep CD which has calming music to help him relax. (Our son has ADHD so anything to help him settle down helped) He also needed to have some type of night light. The small plug in ones were not enough lighting for him so we had to put a 15watt light bulb in the small lamp on his dresser. And lastly the dog had to sleep with him in his room. I guess it was a sense of security. I know this seems like alot but a little patience goes along way. And as he gets older you can start taking thing out one by one if needed. We took away the CD thing about a year ago.
Our son is now 7 years old and going to bed is a breeze. I think the biggest thing was the routine bed time. Also we had to put our daughter to bed first then our son and then us. It was hard for him to understand why we got to stay up after they were in bed. We had to explain to him that the older ones got to stay up later then the younger ones. So putting our daughter (the youndest) to bed 1st and then a half hour later put him to bed (middle) then Us (older) It helped for us to go to bed the same time every night too (i guess it set an example for our kids). I hope this helps you... just have patience and it will all work our...sooner or later.
If he fights and want s to sleep in your room, which our did too. Tell him that the only way they get to sleep in mommies and daddies room is if they are sick and the doctor says their sick. Then they can sleep in our room but not in the bed--on the floor with his covers and pillow. Sorry I know its alot but When we were in that situation every little bit helps. Good Luck!

This will take some time, but here's how I did/do it. Tuck him in bed, do the whole routine you normally do. Kiss him, and tell him you have something to do (like putting the laundry away) and you will be back in 2 minutes. Go back in his room and 2 minutes, check on him, and tell him you'll be back in 5 minutes. If he's quiet, extend the time, but always go check on him when you say you will. He will learn that you will be there if he needs you, but also learn how to go to sleep on his own.

Once he's doing well with this, you can extend the time for the first "check" and will need to check less often.

I wish I could give you some advice, but I am having the same problem with my 4 1/2 year old daughter. She will fall asleep on the couch watching tv - then we put her to bed and somewhere during the middle of the night she walks down the hallway to our bedroom. I get up at 4:30 in the morning so it is easier for me to pick her up and put her in bed with us. I am not sure myself on how to break this habit. If you get some good advice, can you please share.

Thanks - JA - mother of 4 1/2 year old daughter and 10-year old step-daughter

a nice routine, and consistency.
almost all the problems like this occur because of lack of consistency....and it IS hard! you can make exceptions AFTER the new habit is formed and solid and working well.
khairete
S.

C.,
I don't know what the answer is. We are experiencing the same problem with our little boy who just turned 5. We feel like we have tried everything! Even if we get him to sleep in his bed initially, he wakes up in ours. If you get any helpful advice, please share. I'd love to have my bed be just me and my hubby again! (-:

You can put him down for sleep, in his own room, his own bed and sing to him. Once he falls asleep, quitely leave the room. If he wakes up and come into your room, pick him up again, take him back to his bed, while patting him on the back and singing softly. After about two to four nights, he will get the message and look forward to you singing him to sleep.

Barbara Budd

I was having the same problem with my daughter, so I tried a bribe (of course I mean a reward.) EVERY night, after she says goodnight to her dad and brother, I go with her to brush her hair and teeth, then if we have time we read. If not, usually because I have let her stay up too late, we skip it. But then, what has worked for her, is I stay with her for 5 minutes. The deal is she has to be quiet, no talking or playing, and when the 5 minutes (and only five) are over I whisper goodnight and leave the room. She is always still awake and whispers goodnight back.
I explained all this to her the first night, and told her that if she stays in bed all night then when she wakes she can watch 30 minutes on the big screen TV. This is a big deal to her, since I don't like TV in the morning. The first day went great, and the next time she got up. She was very dissapointed about missing out on her "screen time" so she has stayed in bed almost every night.
This is the child who has been waking me up several times a night since she was in my belly! Hope this can be useful to you, looks like a lot of others are dealing with the same problem. I guess once they realize we mean business and do not like being woke up they will give up.

let him warch cartoons, dat will put him 2 bed

Hi C.,

Call Super Nanny.

A habit that has formed will take days or week to change.

You tell him once as you are putting him back to bed that it is his bedtime and he needs to go to sleep.

When he comes out, put him back in his bed and do not speak to him.

Continue to do that without speaking until he cries himself to slepp. How long this will take depends on the child.

Be consistent. Good luck. Hope this helps. D.

Hi C.,
I have a five (six on the 24th)year daughter who went through the same thing. I co-slept with her until she was six months then put her in her own room. She was a great sleeper until about age 3. She started crawling back in bed with us in the middle of the night. Since it didn't bother my husband or me, we let it go on for a year. After a year I put a sheepskin on the floor next to my bed and she slept there for another year. I always put her to bed in her own room and she would fall asleep. But, she'd always wake in the night and come to my room. I was too tired/lazy to walk her back. Anyway, my husband finally declared that he wanted her in her own room ALL night. So about six months ago, I sat her down and explained that she was a big girl now and needed to stay in her own bed. I told her if she came to my room, that I would walk her back. If she refused to stay, I wuld close her door (she hates this). The first night, she was scared but went to bed as usual. However, I ended up walking her back approximately 10-12 times that night. The next night, six times with lots of tears. The third night, only twice! Since then she only comes in once a night and has no trouble going back to her own bed. For me the trick was pure consistency. I made sure I walked her back EVERY time. This is a tough issue to get through but it can be done. Good luck!

Buy a set of walkie talkies. That's how I go my five year old to do it when he wouldn't! That way he stayed connected, he knew he could reach us in case of any impending "emergency" and he felt safer! :)
Good luck!
B.

yOu could try a baby gate

Our four year old is still trying to crawl in our bed lots of the time and often does in the middle of the night. We just keep putting him in his bed when he falls asleep. Maybe a nightlight will help or letting him watch tv for a bit in his room before turning off the lights. Read him a book or give him his favorite stuffed animal to snuggle with. Tell him there is nothing to worry about and tell him you are right in the other room. We just try to make bedtime a happy experience and we don't drag it on and on.

Unfortunately, I don't think there's a "quick fix" for that!! My son slept in our bed (off & on) for 3 years, but we decided that before his baby sister was born we would get him in his own bed!! For the first several nights, we read him a few stories and then stayed with him until he fell asleep. Next, we read the stories and left the room, telling him that we'd come back in a few minutes..which we did every 5 minutes until he was asleep. After several nights of that, he would fall asleep before we came back in. He still comes to our bed sometimes, but he stays in bed most nights.
I would try letting him pick out new sheets and come up with some type of reward if he stays in bed for several nights in a row. Also, there are great nightlights that project stars onto the ceiling if your son is scared of the dark. It worked for us!!