6 Week Old Not Sleeping in Crib

"Happiest Baby on the Block" - DVD.... Great if you don't have time to read a book (which you probably don't). There is a book version if you prefer. "Happiest Baby on the Block" is written by some pediatrician and popular. Being you have a 6 week old, head to Amazone and get it sent used. I sent it to a cousin, she really wished she had watched it BEFORE the baby. My husband and I saw it in our birth class. Made total sense. All about INFANT brain behavior and sleeping, etc. Incorporates the 5 s's. Swaddling (TIGHT), Shhhing (LOUD), Sucking, Side, Swinging. Explains WHY each works, but need to be used together most likely. Basically, "Happiest Baby" incorporates what so many of the mom's already responded about. Explains from a pediatrician why they work and how to make it work for you by combining them all. "Happiest Baby" clearing demonstrates how to get them to sleep LONGER then 20 minutes at a crack.

Hi R.:
I have a little different approach to the situation. My husband is from India and in his culture it is common for the infant to sleep with the parents for the first 6 months. It is said to almost eliminate the issue of SIDS. The way is was explained to me is that the infant was inside you for 9 months then it is suddenly in this new and terrifying environment. It can be stressful for the infant. The shock of being constantly separated from you is very scary and stressful. If you have the child near you they can feel, smell and see you providing them with comfort and easing the transition to the real world.
I have to admit I was unsure of the whole idea, but decided to try it. I now have to admit I wouldn't have it any other way. My son is confident, social, has had less separation anxiety and is overall very well adjusted. I do admit it can be a little taxing on the personal relationship, but both my husband and I decided that our baby was the most important thing.
I would say to enjoy your time with him. He is looking to you for love and comfort. It will only be a short time before the long cuddles are down to 2 minutes in your lap.
If you prefer the approach of separation I would suggest that you sleep with one of his blankets then use it to swaddle him. Being surrounded by your scent will comfort him.
Good luck and more changes are around the corner.

Some of the best advice I received was to let a baby sleep wherever they want! For us, that meant some naps taken in the swing, and sleeping at night in her carseat. I know that sounds bizarre, but it really worked (and was suggested by our pediatrician). Babies like to feel snuggled, like they were in the womb. Sometimes the first twelve weeks is referred to as the 4th trimester... They need that environment to be replicated as closely as possible. We swaddled the baby (in a Miracle Blanket, which I highly recommend for babies who escape swaddles!), gave her a pacifier, and rocked her to sleep in her carseat. We did that from about 8 weeks to 4 months because she did exactly what your baby is doing - woke after 20 minutes, if she slept at all. After her 4 month checkup our doctor said it was time to push the crib, and with a little bit of sleep training, she transitioned just fine.

It feels like an eternity now, but once they hit about 3-4 months, all of this will seem like a distant memory! My baby was a very difficult newborn; she didn't sleep more than 3 hours consecutively until she was about 3 months old. She cried all the time, and refused to nap or sleep. I thought it would never end! Then, all of the sudden, she was a really easy baby, and all that crying and waking seemed like it was ages ago!

Just do whatever works for you and your baby...and that could change from day to day...Just keep trying! Good luck to you!

Your baby knows what he needs, and that is closeness with his mother. After about 11 months of co-sleeping you will be able to easily transition him to a floor mattress/low toddler bed because he will have had the security he needed at the most crucial time: when he needed it. The co-sleeping is for the baby's benefit so you are giving him the security he needs at this stage in his life. You carried him in your womb for almost a year, so why shouldn't he want to be close to you when he sleeps now that he's out? This making-the-baby-sleep-in-the-crib is an American phenomenon, and I believe it causes lots of problems for our kids.

Babies like to be warm, which is why sleeping with you is so comforting.

Do this R.: put a cotton hat on his head, warm jammies and wrap him up in a receiving blanket (sort of like a burrito). Find a cushy pillow and put it on your lap, put him on top of the pillow and feed him there (are you nursing?... either way, this works).

When he falls asleep, move the pillow with the baby on top to wherever you want him to sleep. Being wrapped up will keep him warm and enable him to sleep for longer periods without you.

My son is 8 months & this is how he sleeps. Talk to your doctor but mine said that some babies are just not nappers. As long as he doesn't wake up crabby this just might be all he needs. He does sleep through the night though so this is where your doctor might be handy. Remember that he is still so little so don't get frustrated, things will get easier!

You are going to get many responses to this. Here's mine - Just let him sleep with you and enjoy the wonderful closeness. He will be grown up soon enough. Most of the babies in this world sleep with their mothers.

In the end, you will do what works for you and your son.

Read Nightime parenting by Dr. Sears. It saved my life when I have my first baby. Your baby just wants to be close to you, and do keep him close as this time in your life is fleeting. Have you thought or tried a sling for during the day? Babies who are "worn" tend to be more content and easier to deal with. A maya wrap was a must have at our house. Also, a "side car" (like a crib, that is at the edge of your bed) may be helpful. That way he is close and you can lie down with him as needed, but he isn't in your bed and is handy for nighttime needs. If there is a La Leche League meeting near you, they have a library of books and I know the Dr. Sears books are available through LLL. Hope this helps! Congrats on your new arrival!
J.

He's so little yet. He really needs his mommy. My son would only lay by himself if he was swaddled. It is key to put him to sleep while he is awake too so that he can learn to fall asleep, but he is too young for that I think. I think usually between 3- 6 mo. He slept in his carseat a lot on the floor. I think sometimes it was a little hard for him to breathe in the car seat because he would make these little gasping noises occasionally and probably wasn't the safest choice. I guess they sleep in the car all the time in their seats. I he liked the confined area of it. Then we switched him to the top bassinet of the graco pack n play where he slept swaddled (hog tied as my husband liked to call it) until around 6 months when he started to pull himself up. So then we slowly starting letting him use his crib for naps and one night around 8 months my husband decided that we were hindering his healthy sleep habits and bought both the Elizabeth Pantley No Cry Sleep Solution and the Dr Ferber one. We used aspects from both books. From that point on the baby only sleeps in his crib for naps, nightime. i do pull him into bed around 5am to nurse and sleep. I guess i would get the books and read them (both easy reads) and prepare before it's too late to get into the good habits.

Hi R.-
You couldn't say it better than that. Although I have to say it is a good change and everyday from here on will be different and unique and you will remember for ever. Don't forget they grow up so fast. I owned a daycare in Lincoln, NE for 7 years and have heard this question a lot from different parents. Here are my tips. Although being a first time mom it is hard but to hear your little one cry but, sometimes having music on low in his room will help. Also, with my son (I had the same problem) I heard about putting uncooked rice in a sock and putting that in the microwave for a few seconds and when you do that it keeps heat but, it isn't to hot and you put one on his back and one on his front side and he feels like he is laying next to you. But, like I said it is hard I know to hear him or her cry but, it gets easier as time goes on and he won't even cry at all when you lay him down for bed and he will sleep so much sounder. I also found out that with my daughter at 2 weeks old she was already attached to a certain blanket. I know that seems weird because she was so little but she is 5 now and still sleeps with that blanket.
I hope that helps
T.

This is a very personal subject and can be quite frustrating for a new mom who's all ready tired from all the energy spent during the day. I learned from experience that allowing a baby to sleep with the parents is a hard habit to break. It's not fun when they're 6 or 7 and still want to be in your bed. No one gets great rest. What I did with my last 3 (obviously learned after the 1st - I have 4 daughters) was to place a bassinette or a very small crib/cradle right up to my side of the bed. I would swaddle the baby in blankets being careful that they would not smother. When the baby would wimper, I would place my hand on her tummy or rub her head and coo to her. This would seem to work. I was always certain that she had a full tummy and a good burp, and would keep her up until as late as I could take - usually about 10:30pm before settling for the night. It may feel nice to sleep with the baby, but it can be dangerous due to smothering in heavy bed clothes or under the weight of a sound asleep adult - usually not the mother. It's also a good idea to try to place them in their crib/cradle when they are awake if possible. Say goodnight, etc. This works better once the baby is older, but can be started with naps during the day before starting this at night. As babies get older, they come to realize that if they cry, even a little, mom will be there. Don't jump at the first little wimper. Try to soothe without picking her up. If she does cry, then, of course you need to attend to her. This prepares them for a bedtime routine. Good luck! These little folks sure do set the standards for our schedules!

Hi R.
Maybe you could try putting a heating pad or warm water bottle in his crib before you lay him down so the bed is not cold. My son would only sleep in his crib with a pillow under the matress to elevate him a little. you may also want to try playing some white noise for him, he is use to hearing your heartbeat and amniotic fluid moving around. Good Luck, Congratulations on your son :)T.

My son had the same problem when he was an infant so I started laying him in his car seat. I would put a heavier blanket down first so the straps would not be easy for him to accidentally grab or tangle around him. It worked great! I think that it kinda tricked him into thinking that I was still holding him and made him feel more secure. I did speak with my Dr about it at the time and he said that it was fine as long as the straps were out of the way and thought that it was a good idea to put a blanket down first. If I remember correctly my son slept like that until he was 3 or 4 months old and was wanting to roll over in his sleep. It worked for me. Good Luck!

You have received wonderful advice! The only things I can add is using a sling for during the day (I have a Moby wrap) and using a "noise machine" for when you lay him down.
My daughter would only sleep swaddled and with white noise in the background.
If co-sleeping is not for you don't feel any pressure. There are many ways to let your child know that he is safe, loved and secure. I loved using the Moby wrap at night too. My daughter had severe reflux and she slept the best when I held her while sitting in a chair. Having her in the wrap made me comfortable enough to sleep too without fear of dropping her!
Good luck!

Is he warm enough? Try putting a receiving blanket over the bottom sheet and lay him on that. Sheets tend to feel cool to the touch and moving from Mom's warm body and to cool sheets will wake up a baby. My grandson is about the same age and my daughter and son-in-law find that if they swaddle him tightly he sleeps better.
Also is he burping enough? He may need to burp more and the gas bubbles are going out the bottom and that can be painful for a newborn. If he seems gassy try a washcloth wrung out on very warm water in a plastic bag on his tummy. They also have a gas drop product for newborns now that is very effective.

R.,

My daughter started out the same way refusing to sleep unless I was holding her. I felt pressure to fix the situation because I was afraid that she might never learn to sleep on her own even though I secretly enjoyed the cuddling. I got a lot of advice from well-meaning people that I should just put her in her crib and let her cry it out but I just wasn't ready to do that. She started sleeping in her papasan swing in our bedroom by 2.5 months and we finally transitioned her to her bed at 6 months. She made the transition really well and she goes down without a peep now. I think each kid has their own time table for sleeping on their own in their crib. Don't let anyone pressure you into transitioning your child until you think he is ready. You're the mommy...you will know. And don't feel guilty about enjoying the cuddle time now...he won't always want to cuddle with his mom so take advantage while you can!

I'm another subscriber to Dr Karp and Happiest Baby on the Block! We took a class and had a live demo of swaddling in action. Fussy baby stopped immediately and was comfy and quiet in her mom's arms for the 2 hour class. Anyway, our favorite advice was the swing (one of the 5 S's). Kaz slept great in his swing. You just want one that has a fast speed setting and tilts back to almost horizontal or as close as you can get. The crib was not a popular option until our guy hit 4 months and then only for naps. Every baby is different and so what will work will vary. Try different things to sees what your little one likes best.

Hello, just a suggestion...
If he still likes to be wrapped up tight, try that, or put blankets around him (obviously don't smother him) but make him feel like he is being held. Babies like that feeling of tight places like they were in the womb.
Also try to find a sound machine with soothing noises or a heartbeating noise, they hear that in the womb too.
When my kids were babies sleep was one of the hardest things for them to learn, they are now 9 and 7 years old and still sometimes battle with sleep.
Be patient and good luck!!

Happiest Baby on the Block - DUDU swaddling. It helped our little man sleep through the night.

Dear R.,

Congratulations on your new little one! I didn't realize what sleep deprivation was untill I had a child. I assumed you put them into their crib at night, and thats where they would sleep. Boy, was I in for a rude awakening. My kids also would not sleep unless I was next to them. After reading and asking around I found out that co-bedding was very typical and is what most people do in other countries other than our own. I slept with both of my children atleast part of the night untill they were 9 monthes old. You hear horror stories of children getting rolled over on/ falling in between the mattress and the wall etc. and these things do happen. However booth my kids are a-ok. The key is to use a co sleeper/ do not put them in between you and your husband or let them sleep with a grandparent or caregiver other than you. It is only natural that they want to be near you, they spent the last 10 monthes feeling your heart beat and breath. I also found it very convenient to have them there while they still needed night feedings. I got them to sleep on their own by introducing them to it gradually. Putting them down whenever they napped, and in their crib when they first fell asleep at night. AFter they woke up I would bring them into bed with me and eventually the time that they slept in their own bed just got longer and longer. I do know a friend whose baby always slept in their crib from the beginning. Which to me just didn't feel natural. It was too hard for me knowing that the pain of them crying when they were away from me to hard to handle, but Im sure it can be done. Good luck, and you'll get ther. Chances are when they are in college they wont want to sleep with you anymore ;)

i am surprised by the answers! i expected a lot more of them to be entitled "dont respond to your baby's cries, let him cry it out" so i am pleasantly surprised!!

this is some good advice. let your baby sleep with you if you have to. my son still wakes by 5 am and wants to be with mom and dad. too soon they are older and done want this anymore, and you will never regret the time you spent caring for your son and responding to his feelings.

happiest baby on the block dvd came too late for my son, but i cried my head off when i watched it as it was exactly what my son wanted.

any baby book by the sears family, william sears, robert sears etc, are excellent...

keep pluggin along at this. the more you respond to their needs the less you will have to worry about later. it gives them the confidence they need to, like my son, finally just go to sleep on his own!

Hi R.,

We used a basinet for our children until they outgrew it. It was small like the bed they were placed in in the hospital.

Have you tried swaddling him in a blanket?

Or perhaps, making his bed comfy. I know for our son he liked having a pillow next to him. I think it made his crib seem not so big.

It's so hard to try and figure these precious little ones out. But what I would do is put yourself in his shoes. Does he look comfy? Does he look like the bed is too big for him?
Have you tried putting him to sleep in his chair? Maybe he likes to sit better. I know my kids when they were tiny slept in the basinet and in their little seats. We tilted them back so they were in the cradle position.

It was like magic. We also went for long walks and long rides in the car!

You just gotta find what makes them happy.

Best wishes.

J.

My daughter was the same way, she needed that reassurance that I was close (she took a lot of naps on me for the first 4 months). We ended up putting a bassinet next to my side of them bed. That way at night she knew I was close by and she felt safe in the small bassinet. She slept in the bassinet till she was 5 1/2 months... then she out grew it and it was an easy transition to the crib. I did put one of my shirts in the crib with her in hopes to lessen her 'stress' of the change, she soon ended up with a favorite blanket and small 'fuzzy' bear blanket that replaced my shirt.

Hope you find something that works for you and your little one!

K.

When my daughter was this age, we found that having her sleep in her car seat or in her bouncy seat worked best. Sometimes my husband would even sleep on the couch with our baby on his chest, and she slept a long time that way, but you can't do that every night. I would think that giving him a more tight, confined space would help. A bassinette (sp?) is something I've heard from others has worked for them, too. Hopefully that helps!

Hi R.,
It is true, you never realize how much your life is gonna change with a little newborn baby! I remember it like yesterday, although my oldest daughter will be 22 in October!
I know exactly what you mean reading your problem; you could try to have a t-shirt worn by yourself in his crib; little babies are very sensitive for smell, it is not exactly that they won't sleep (they are not aware of their own will), but more they realize they miss something: their mommy must be close at hand! It is better for your night rest and safer for the baby to sleep in his own crib, so perhaps you can use your t-shirt as a sort of pillow case? In the baby's eyes (or nose ;-)) it means that mom is always close at hand! Good luck for your and your little one!
Anne-Marie (mom of 2 daughters, living in the Netherlands, working all my life as pediatric nurse/physician assistant)

We used a Kiddopotamus Swaddle Me Blanket that's designed with velcro to keep baby swaddled. Our daughter was very good at undoing receiving blankets...even the super-tight swaddles the nurses at the hospital did! We called it her baby-straight-jacket, but it was very helpful. We also let her sleep in her swing. We couldn't swaddle and safely strap her in, so we would just strap her into the swing, and bundle her receiving blanket around her. She really liked the closeness and motion of being in the swing, and eventually (around 2 1/2 to 3 months) we transitioned her to the bassinette with the baby-straight-jacket.

such a crazy and fun time! our baby is 6 mo.'s and he's gone through sooo many sleeping changes. i would really suggest doing what he needs you to do right now. he needs you and you are what he knows. you'll both sleep better if you don't fight it for right now. you can always try later to get him in his own crib. he won't sleep with you forever and this time goes so quickly! eat him up while he still wants to cuddle! good luck and enjoy him...don't forget to take care of yourself as much as possible!

there is a great book out there called Happy Sleep Habits, Healthy Child by Marc Weissbluth. You cant go wrong with this book. I have a 2-1/2 yr old and a 2 week old.

Is he hungry or have gas? My kids were crying freaks when they were newborns through the first three months. I found too that my first daughter would cry and cry unless she was on me until one day I went against what doctors tell people, I flipped her on her belly and she slept great. Both my girls did wake every 2-3 hours until they were 8 months or so. If you give formula that is supposed to stick to their belly better than breastmilk. Not sure what you can do to make him sleep longer but to figure out what he needs or wants. Does he like to be swaddled? Maybe that will help.

I have a 5.5 month old daughter and I remember trying to put her in the crib at 6 weeks and she wouldn't sleep in it. Instead, we use to rock her to sleep and then put her in the car seat and then she'd sleep 3-4 hours at least - babies at this young age like to sleep in closed quarters and a crib is too open. Because they were in the womb for so long they still like to have their legs crunched up closer to their body to be warm so I would try a car seat for another few weeks. You can also try to swaddle him and put him in the crib -that may work too. We put her in her bed at about 10 weeks when I had to go back to work and she sleeps 9 hours a night now - it's a blessing. Good luck!

We had the same issue with our first one. What worked for us was having her take her naps and sleep nights in her carseat for a few months in our bed. Then I moved her carseat into the crib and eventually got her out of the car seat and into the crib.

My first child was the same way.

What finally worked for us was we went out and bought a bassinet. BUT, you have to get one that has a mobile that turns (ours has bears) and has lights on it. EMPHASIS ON LIGHTS. This is the only kind that has worked for numerous of my friends and relatives. The babies love watching the lighted mobile and fall asleep all by themselves. We got ours at Target.

We went through the same thing with my second child. What we did was put a hot water bottle (you could use a hot pack or neck warmer, etc)in her bed about 15 minutes before laying her down. I would hold her until she fell asleep then transfer her to her crib. This worked well, and eventually we could put her down in her warm crib where she would fall asleep by herself.