ADD And Incomplete Assignments

Updated on July 28, 2008
E.J. asks from Clarksville, TN
20 answers

Hi all. I have a 7 yr. old daughter, and she was diagnosed with ADHD a long time ago. However, we have since found out that this wasn't exactly true. She may have ADD and something else going on. She is very bright and talented, but when it comes to doing her work AT SCHOOL she is not very productive. This has been happening for off an on this term, and we have no problems at home. She does all work in a timely manner, and has time left to do others things if not grounded for not doing it at school. We do not want to do any meds, because we've been that route and they either had adverse effects or did nothing at all. If you have ANY suggestions for us please send them our way. What can we do for our precious and very intelligent child? Thanks in advance for any advice or information that any of you can provide. Have a blessed day, weekend, week and holiday.

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So What Happened?

Ok. Thanks to all of you for you wonderful suggestions and comments. My daughter is very bright, and they realized this during the past year at Sylvan. Remarkably, she is still not doing well in Math, but she knows all of her multiplication tables, can do fractions and is quite talented in other areas. She is the only one in her class who knows are of her multiplication tables. She learned them with me, and by repetitively listening to a multiplication rap CD from the Teacher's Helper. It took 2 weeks. So, we incorporate fun and games into each learning session. It is still a little frustrating but she actually does better now than she did with the Focalin. The Focalin did help to improve her handwriting..that's all. She is in the after school program as well. The principal allows her to come into her office to take tests in a quiet environment, and she is also Building Buddy, her mentor, at school and she absolutely loves that. We are slowly and very carefully building her confidence level. She does appear to be incredibly bored at times. We also do computer games and a lot of family oriented memory games to aid in her learning. We simply have to get her to believe that she can do it all herself. The math exams do not reflect her efforts or ours at home. For all who are struggling, there is hope and simply continue to pray for us.

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R.F.

answers from Memphis on

Hi E.!

Have you reached out to some of the different tutoring facilities-sylvan learning center and such? Maybe she is smarter than most and she is bored. Maybe she just needs to learn an extra study skill to help her stay focused. I think you are awesome for not wanting the meds. Do you think she is being challenged enough? just a thought!

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S.G.

answers from Little Rock on

I have an 11 year old son who has ADHD. He has problems concentrating and all the other symptoms at school plus has problems at home. I am a single mother divorced 6 years ago and that is when my son's problems started. Children from divorced homes or fathers that aren't there enough tend to end up being ADD or ADHD for psychological reason being that they cannot deal with the changes or lack of a father in their lives so it comes out in this form. Of course it is not the same in every case, but maybe in your case it might be. Try reading "The Five Love Languages" by Gary Chapman. It gives insight into what language to speak to reach children. Aparently you are speaking your daughters love language and at school she is being overlooked. There can be many reasons, but atleast this gives you a start. In my son's case, if I speak his love language I get the results I need and it depends on what teachers he has to whether he is a good student or not.

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S.S.

answers from Birmingham on

I don't know if you have ever used "charts" or not to help keep your daughter on track, but I use them with my two grands that I'm raising.
I've found a place online that is currently free and fun for the children as well. It's called "Handipoints." It's great! Here's the link. www.handipoints.com
Try it out and let me know what you think. Many times things like this give them the incentive to do more.
God bless...I've been where you are and made it through...you will do!

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B.S.

answers from Clarksville on

I am 52 years old now but I had ADHD when it wasn't discussed or even had a name . I know what its like to sit in school and your mind be miles away. I of course wasn't allowed to act up like a lot of kids with adhd do now because then parents still believed in disapline (Thank God) . However its a real pain to read and your mind no retain because it wants to be off in left field somewhere. Go to a health food store and talk to someone there that knows what they are doing and they can probably point you in the right direction naturally.

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M.T.

answers from Fayetteville on

You should talk to her teacher and see if there are any classroom distractions keeping her from doing her work. My husband was the same type of child. Only he refused to do homework. Work at school wasnt a problem. I would also suggest a behavior chart just to see if there is something else going on.

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A.M.

answers from Nashville on

E.-- You may also want to look into magnet/charter schools and see if there are any in your area. These schools generally have a better teacher / student ratio and the kids have some more freedom in the way that they complete their work. Plus if your daughter is advanced in any areas she would be able to do work at a higher grade level.
Good luck!

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S.J.

answers from Knoxville on

Hello E.~

I am a mother of an 8 year old ADHD child that is not on medications. The school principal actually sat me down and told me that I should have my child on medications, and I am a bad parent for not doing so...that it helped her daughters and I should do what she did. Well, I am not sorry to say that I didn't follow what she said. I already went down that road and like you, it worked where she acted like she was stoned/high as a kite or nothing at all. My daughter is very intelligent as well, but her ADHD does slow her down at certain points. She takes two special ed courses, which helps her with her school work AT school, and then a couple of pages get sent home on Monday, due on Thursday, and they also back everything up for the rest of the week for one hour daily. The school should offer something, even a tutoring program if she has that big of an issue with doing the work while there. Since she has no problems doing it at home, you must have a wonderfully structured home. That shows care on your end. The schools don't seem to have much patience because they deal with so many children, and if you are not careful, they will lable her as a problem child...just be cautious. I had problems with alot of schools, until this school this year. My daughter has improved 100%, and the one hour a day special ed tutoring has helped! She just has a problem focusing, and there aren't that many kids around during this time and she gets one on one help and it is definitly done for that day there. Let me know if you need anything else! Good luck and God Bless.

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K.T.

answers from Chattanooga on

Hi E.,

I was a sixth grade teacher before my daughter was born in March, and I had a number of kids who had trouble getting work done in class. Some were diagnosed with ADD or other issues, some weren't. For my kids with serious attention issues, I would set a timer and give them a certain amount of time to complete a specific amount of work (this could also be done by timing herself on the clock in the classroom). Breaking up the time seems to help. I would also give my students a checklist of assignments that they could check off as they go. If possible, it would be great if you could sit and observe in her classroom for a day. I would talk with the teacher ahead of time and say that you've noticed that your daughter isn't getting her work done, and just want to see what might be different in the classroom setting. Sometimes kids are distracted by the things on the walls, other students, which seat they have in the room, etc. Now, your presence will change the dynamic, but you can see in person how the day is ordered, what time is allowed for assignments to be completed in class, how your child uses the time, etc.

I hope these suggestions help. If I can be of any other help, let me know!

:) K.

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A.L.

answers from Nashville on

Have you met with her teacher? Sometimes they don't mesh. Also, how current is the single part? I was diagnosed with ADHD when I was young and my mother enrolled me in anything that was full of activity. Especially now since schools take out PE. My kids are 4 and 2, but sometimes the problems stem from the basics.
hope I could be of help

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J.C.

answers from Tuscaloosa on

I completely agree that if she has no problems at home that there is probably something going on in the classroom environment that is keeping her from getting her work done. A parent/teacher conference should be the first route. Perhaps she is being picked on or just too bust talking to her friends. Maybe moving her to a different seat or something would help.

If that route doesn't work, seek out a child psychologist and try doing some behavior modification or cognitive-behavior therapy.

Good luck!

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M.H.

answers from Birmingham on

We had the same problem with our daughter when she was in first grade and it all came down to the teacher. My daughter always made A's on her papers but they would have big, ugly red marks on them saying she took 2 or 3 hours to complete and missed PE and recess to complete. We had her evaluated and the Dr said she didn't have ADD or if she did it was borderline. She gets easily distracted and if not reminded often to get back on task she will daydream all day. At home as long as I reminded her every few minutes to get back to work she would complete her assignments but the teacher just let her sit there. Fortunately we gat a great 2nd grade teacher and had no problems after that. Also the older she gets the longer she can concentrate. The main thing is not to let her hate school while she's going through this.

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D.M.

answers from Johnson City on

I know you've had lots of advice already, so I won't be long. You might want to try the outdoors. I have read about kids with ADHD doing nature type therapy. You might want to start a small garden for your daughter to tend to with you. I know you don't want to do medicine, so that's an alternative. I think children these days just don't have enough free play outside, and it can greatly affect them. A good book to read is "Last Child in the Woods" I am glad to hear things are doing better.

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M.I.

answers from Johnson City on

Dear E., I am a mother of 2: 15 yr. old daughter and a 10 1/2 yr. old boy. I used to homeschool my son for half of 3rd grade and all of 4th grade. He is now at public school, in the 5th grade. I home-schooled him in the past because he was diagnosed with ADD. He had trouble turning his work in and paying attention to the teacher. He hardly ever would write down his homework. We started him on a drug called Concerta. He takes 54mg of Concerta every morning before school and it WORKS!! This drug is the reason I can send him back to public school!! I know you said that you did not want to use drugs, but maybe you can at least ask him about it. It may be worth a shot. My son has had NO side-effects in the 1 1/2 years he has taken it. The only thing I have noticed is that, if he forgets to take the medicine, I can definitely tell. Good luck!!

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T.P.

answers from Jonesboro on

If the meds had no affect at all, it's not ADHD. Because no matter what, they would have had a little affect. I recommend taking her and having her tested to see what it could be. She could possibly have a learning disability. Or it could be something as simple as an issue in her classroom with her teacher, or another student!

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K.M.

answers from Baton Rouge on

I've noticed ADD and ADHD have been used interchangeably here. They are not exactly the same. While a child with ADHD is physically hyperactive and can't seem to sit still a child with ADD may seem totally opposite and far too laid back. Meanwhile, the same thing is going on in their minds which is everything! My daughter is ADD and after taking her to a doctor and listening to what's going on with her, I realize she inherited that tendency from both me and her dad.

Although not exclusive, more often boys are ADHD while girls are more likely to be ADD. Many people don't realize this but ADD/ADHD sometimes accompany dyslexia which can be a learning difference for very bright children. Sometimes very bright children are just distractable because they are bored to death.
Meds are cool for those who can use thme, however, some people feel that meds are a cure all and they are not. They have to be used with therapy which helps to changed learned behaviors. People who only wnat to drug a child usually want an active child to settle down as their goal---for their pwn comfort and not for the child's difference.

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H.L.

answers from Baton Rouge on

My nephew just went through this with his meds. He was diagnosed at 6 with ADHD and tried every med possible. He also is a very intellegent kid and VERY Artistic. We found out when he was in 7th grade he didn't have ADHD he had a learning disability. He is now repeating the 7th grade for the 3rd time. This year he is in a great school in Baton Rouge called Brighten. They have done wonders with him, he is a straight A student in extra caricular activities, playing in a band with his dad and is learning so much better. He was having the same problems in school where he couldn't understand anything in class but when he got home and read over it again he would get because he went at his own pace. Maybe you could see if that is what's wrong. Good Luck.

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K.M.

answers from Little Rock on

Dear E.,
Since you are in the medical profession, I'm not sure your beliefs in homeopathic medicine, but it wouldn't hurt to try this. It is called EFT, meaning Emotional Freedom Technique. It involves 'tapping' it is actually like needleless acupuncture. EFT is based on imbalances in the body's energy system. My mother sent me info on EFT for use on my own daughter and it definately improved in certain areas. You can check out the website at www.emofree.com. My mother sent me an article regarding a boy that had been diagnosed with ADHD and was having trouble concentrating, be inattentive and lack focus in school. The young boy had seen his mother tapping and began doing it himself and a couple of days later, the mother had recieved a phone call from the school asking what the child was doing with this "tapping" because it had calmed him, made him more attentive and alert. This article is at www.emofree.com/Children/adhd-helen.htm. Good Luck!!!!

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J.

answers from Shreveport on

Hi. I have a 9 year old son who is ADHD, more hyper than anything. Very bright. We figured this out at age 3. We have done the medicine route and thru the years he has matured and the dosage gradually comes down. However, I do think that medication does give him a better oppportunity to be a successful student. Always makes good grades. You should check into our child's school and get her enrolled in the 504 program. It is not special Ed, but it is a program that will help modify teaching methods, test taking, and gives excellent guideance and positive feedback for your child. Examples include alittle more time taking test, able to take a test in a quite room, someone to help him remember to bring homework home etc. It has been great. And the teachers are very responsive to this as well. It does get better the older the child gets. But these first 5 years of schooling and the most important and they should learn all they can. Good Luck.

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T.G.

answers from Nashville on

E.,
I was really moved by your story and the challenges you are experiencing with your daughter.. I too am a health professional (MD) and we have been working with moms in our area who have children diagnosed with ADD or ADHD, looking for natural alternatives.. We have an MD who is a MED/PEDs specialist who has a son with ADHD and several other families that have had remarkable success with our "wellness package"
Basically , there is a lot of literature we have found on natural alternatives, ie. omega-3 (DHA)which helps with promoting brain health and focus..We have also found an energy drink ( no sugar, or carbohydrates but packed with 4900%vitB12 and enhancing doses of caffeine, which actually has the same therapeutic effect as the chemical therapies presently prescribed WITHOUT the side effects).Then we added an all natural organic children's multivitamin.. The combination of these three products has resulted in these children now excelling in school, focusing and completing task in a timely manner, happier and able to interact with their peers in meaningful conversations and most of all becoming healthier without the fear of possible long term side effects from the chemical therapies presently prescribed for these children.. Not only are the parents seeing a difference , but teachers are encouraging the moms to continue with these products since they have noticed a significant improvement day to day...
So, if this is something you would like more information about you can reach me @ ____@____.com care and Have a Blessed Weekend!!
T. G

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L.R.

answers from Chattanooga on

You just described me as a child! I am now 27 years old and I still take meds for ADD, they said it was something I may outgrow, but I never did and I now as have I always, depend on meds daily to complete everyday tasks. I was diagnosed at age 6-7. I used to flush my pills as a teen until I realized that they did indeed help me! I do NOT drive my daughter around unless I have taken my meds (currently Adderall XR 20mg once daily). I don't want to discourage you from thinking your daughter may not need to be medicated- that would be wonderful to not depend on anything believe me. I just want you to know that even though I had a ROUGH time in school (my mother is a teacher too!) I made it through and am a very creative, semi normal adult who still takes pills to control her ADD so she can STILL do her homework:)

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