Baby Crying When I Put Her down and Voice

Is the crying teething?To check she would be drooling a lot and chewing on her fists. You will also be able to see if she has white spots along her gum line.The only time you can't tell the signs is if they are back teeth coming in.Generally a baby will get fever if they are teething. To help sooth teething the thing that worked best for me was things ice cold. Something she could chew on. I used freezer pops. The long skinny kindin the plastic wrapper. Since it is plasic I held the pop and rubbed it on the gums & held it while she chewed.
If the excessive crying isn't from teething then I would dare to say she's just a lil spoiled to mommy. There is nothing wrong with that @ all but to break her out of it then if you have checked everything and there is nothing else wrong with her than wanting to be held then I let them cry. This is how I did things when mine we little.

I would suggest that you go to www.nogreaterjoy.com and read as many articles as you have time for in their archives. I have been reading them and have learned some interesting things about children. For instance, babies can be trained and conditioned. This is not punishment, anymore than teaching a puppy not to pee in the house is punishment. However, since a baby has about the intelligence level of a puppy, you can condition it by training.

When a baby is only a few days old, if she cries, she has a need that needs to be dealt with. However, by the time they are about 4 or 5 months, they suddenly discover that they can cry for for wants, too, and that their parents don't know the difference. For example, my 8-month-old will cry if I take a toy away from her. I didn't hurt her, I didn't deprive her of any of the necessities of life, and her diaper is clean and dry, and her tummy is full, but she cried anyway. She wanted the toy. She didn't NEED it, but she wanted it.

So your little one doesn't want to go to sleep. She wants to play with the family. She could be teething--so try some gel or something and see if that works. If it doesn't, then she's just being ornery and spoiled. And because eventually you pick her up, she has learned to persist. She is also old enough to understand you. Sometimes I put my baby down for a nap and she protests (even though I know she is tired, because 2 minutes ago she was rubbing her eyes and looking sleepy). She tries to sit up. I gently force her back into a laying position and tell her to go to sleep. This makes her cry harder, but by now she has learned that it is pointless to try again, because she will not win. So she cries for a few minutes and then goes to sleep. This does not happen every time, but sometimes it does (like today). You will have to be consistent and make her crying counter-productive. If you believe in spanking, try giving her a gentle swat with something that will sting a little (NOT your hand--hands should be for nurturing and anyhow, if you hit a baby with a hand hard enough to hurt, you could do internal damage). I use a chopstick or a 12" flexible twig. Put her down, tell her to sleep, and then let her cry for a bit. If she doesn't start calming down, come in, but don't pick her up. Give her a little swat with the switch on her legs (it should just sting a bit but not damage the skin--test it on yourself first) and say firmly, "I'm not going to pick you up. Stop crying and go to sleep." At first she will cry louder because she has suddenly been deprived of her "rights" to rule, but don't give in. She keeps doing it because she is winning. If you don't let her win, she'll eventually get the idea. She may fall asleep from exhaustion the first night, but the next night if you won and she didn't, it will be easier.

About raising her voice, I really don't know how I would deal with that. My little one doesn't do that, and 3 months is a lot of difference as far as vocal development is concerned. See if you can see why she's doing it. If she seems to be doing it to get attention, try making it counter-productive (only responding when she speaks softly). If you are able to get her to stop, do whatever it is you do, and be consistent. It's like a cat that is trying to get in the house. If you consistently deny them the privilege of entering, they will soon cease to try. However, if you let them in sometimes, they will always try, even if they get literally kicked out 95% of the time--the 5% that they win makes it worth it. Babies and toddlers are the same way. 100% consistency will make for more obedient, and, believe it or not, happier children.

Hope that helps. Let us know what happened.

It could be her teeth or she just doesn't like being left alone. Try a teething ring.

Good luck,
J.
www.deliveringonthepromise.com/40420383

About crying--It sounds to me like she may be going through a normal (but not fun!) phase of separation anxiety. It's about the right time for that to kick in full force, and bedtime is a hard time because she knows that she will be separated from the two of you. I will second the previous poster's advice to do what is best for your family. Our family has never been a cry-it-out family, and we co-sleep with our 18-month old. I realize that that is not for everyone, but again, it's what is best for OUR family. If you feel strongly that she should sleep in her crib, you have a few options: 1) you can continue to go to her throughout the night, taking turns with your husband to give her pats, hugs, rocking, whatever it takes to comfort her back to sleep until she gets through this stage, 2) you could either set up a temporary bed for one of you to stay in her room or move the crib to your bedroom while she learns that even while she is asleep and in her crib, she is not alone 3) you could come up with a controlled cry-it-out plan. Try going to her every 5-10 minutes at first, then stretch it out a little more as she begins to calm down. This will show her right away that she has not been left alone, and it may help her to not become so frantic. If she is really distraught at the beginning of the CIO period, waiting 15-20 minutes may make her so upset that she'll never get to sleep.

About the voice--boy do I feel your pain! We have been practicing using different volumes of our voices--we practice singing, shouting, and whispering together. My son thinks that putting his finger to his lips and saying "shhh" is the funniest thing ever, so when he begins to squeal and yell, we play the voice game--I begin by mimicking (not as loudly) his shouts, and he automatically switches the game around and mimics what I do. We try some sing-song sounds, a few fun words, and finally the "shhhh" sound. By then, he's in more of a quiet play mode. We accidentally came up with this game, so I'm not sure how you'd go about introducing it, but maybe it's an idea that you can use as a springboard.

I hope some of that is helpful! Good luck!

I cannot give you advice on the sleep issue because I rock my son to sleep. He is kinda spoiled, but I would rather him be spoiled than feel abandoned!

But, I can say that my son is VERY vocal. We practice sounds and things and he has calmed down with screaming and yelling at anytime, now he only does it when he needs something or when we are playing. Most babies go thru something like this and I have been told that they are finding out different sounds they can make. Don't stress too much about it. Just watch to make sure that she is not yelling to get something from you....a toy, affection, food, or anything. If she is just yelling to yell, and possibly looking to you for aproval, either engage a play time with her, or tell her "shhh" we have to be quiet now. This has worked for my son! I hope it helps you some!

Without reading all responses.

Have ears checked completely! Mine would not lay down because he had ear infections at that age. Then when I did get him to sleep he would wake up during the night.

Secondly check ears. They get clogged with wax sometimes and we don't hear as well. I had to clean one of mine's ears regulary as he produces a lot of wax.

Thirdly it is a stage and don't worry about it. All kids get loud at times. A 11 month old is not going to understand quiet voice for inside. At 2 he/she will. But not at this age. And check ears!

LOL Ear problems can cause a host of issues. I had a Dr that did not help us and I ended up changing before finding help. Don't be afraid to get a second opinion just to give yourself peace of mind if anything seems not right.

btw I don't believe it just letting them cry it out. A baby that does not cry like that during the day has some problem. There is a reason for suddenly turning this on at nighttime.

Good luck,
ts

Ultimately you have to figure out what is right for you and your family, whether to let her cry. We never did let our 2 kids cry on and on as babies. Babies cry for a reason, not to manipulate like they do as older kids sometimes. You are probably right about the teething. If you will rub her gums for a second, sometimes that will tell you: either it will feel good and she will respond, or it will hurt, and she will cry. My son had all his baby teeth by the time he was 13 mos. old so his experience was much different than my daughter's. It seemed to take her forever to teeth and it caused her lots of misery. I used Orajel, teething tablets, frozen washcloths...she drooled so bad she constantly wore a Chin Bib.
What baby is going to want to leave the comfort of her parents, especially Mom if you are nursing. It's just natural.
Your husband should help you==take turns getting up and soothing her or her teething, diapers, etc.--don't get so sleep deprived like I did. It causes many more problems than just being sleepy, and no one that has never experienced long-term sleep-deprivation can say otherwise.
YOu just have to observe your baby, do what you can to comfort her. Follow your gut---you are hardwired to respond to your baby.
Best wishes.