OK so when did become such a common name? Is it just me or does this make a woman sound like a "thing" instead of a person/human? I was at the store earlier and I hear these two men talking and the one says "there goes my baby mom" and when she comes over, they have 2 kids - about 8 and 10, so obviously they've been together for awhile..so why wouldn't he just say "there's my girlfriend or wife? I'm not married to my kids Dad but he would never refer to me as his "baby mom"..So, I guess my main question is, Am I the only one that thinks that a demoralizing name?
Thanks ladies..I'm not sure why it bothers me but it does. And for those that I asked, my SO refers to me as his girfriend...or most of the time, people just assume we're married and we don't correct them.
It certainly seems to lack any sort of endearment... Personally, if I ever caught my husband calling me that, I'd give him a swift kick in the rear. :) (Unless I KNEW he was being a smarta$$, which he has a tendency to do.)
I think it is a demoralizing name...However, I think the bigger problem is children born out of wedlock.
I know there are circumstances beyond a person's control, but I just feel that children should be given the basic family start when at all possible. If you are not committed to the person you are making the baby with, you should not be making a baby.
This whole "hooking up" mentality is just wrong, and the children are paying the price.
YAY! A rant I can wholeheartedly join in on.
HATE those phrases "babymama" & "babydaddy".
My baby's father, my son's mother... those used to be expressions to indicate the relationship bind/tie/closeness between your CHILD and their other parent. It was a respect thing. Instead of "my ex". A positive way to refer to a child's other parent that you are no longer with.
Babymama & Babydaddy are DISrespectful terms to gouge at your ex / your child's parent.
It's ghetto-speak, and it connotes low-life-non-childsupport-paying-no-time-spending-___insert swear word____.
It caught on from music and media. And it's vile. Especially the number of people who don't KNOW that that's what that word means. Baby'S (note the S) mama is respectful, babymama is DISrespectful. BabySdaddy is respectful, babydaddy is DISrespectful.
And trust me... all the muddleclass and TV folk who are using the term wrong are providing a HUGE laugh at their own expense to poor people who know what the term actually means.
HATE that phrase.
It is largely a cultural thing. Kind of like calling little girls, "mama". It's not something we say in our culture, but the many people who I know that do say it, are not always using out of disrespect... However, the term is based on a disrespectful slang and is also used as such, especially in music and the ghetto.
To me it means they had sex and she got knocked up so there she is.
Ive never liked that term. I think it makes the person saying it sound stupid. Its disrespectful in my mind. It makes the person being refered to as a cheap unimportant part of a childs life. I hear it a lot on court tv shows. They just make themselves sound ignorant when they use the term.
Some find it a different way to say "there is the mother of my children" I think it depends on how it is used. My man says it sometimes and I do not find it demoralizing when he does, but it's often as a joke vs. a commonly used lable.
I think this term came about due to so many people having children out of wedlock these days.
It is for people who have children without being married.
.
I think people just use it to be funny.....because it sounds ridiculous to say if you are being serious :)
That's so "Maury/ Jerry Springer!"
I have a friend that has adult twin daughters that has been married to her husband for 30 years and I jokingly call her husband "your baby's daddy." She cracks up every time I say that because it's so stupid sounding.
I think it describes a relationship that was a hook up that resulted in a baby. That's the extent of the relationship--financial support and some involvement in the child's life.
If my husband referred to me as "there goes the mother of my children" I would probably feel more honored than demoralized, and I think Baby Mamma pretty much means "Mother of my children." But the context it's used in makes a difference. And I don't like being viewed solely as a vessel to bring forth children, as wonderful as that may be. It's just slang.
I dislike it to but I think it comes from one of a couple of angles...one would be that she's not just his girlfriend, but not a wife, and they do have kids together and another could be they do have kids together, are not married, but he doesn't want to say "his girlfriend" because that implies they are an item and he's not available. A third scenario is that they have kids together, either aren't or never were married, and are no longer a couple (or never were a couple and just a fling). When I have heard it used, it is typically more of the latter two.
I don't kow why they wouldn't just say "my kid's mom" or "my girlfriend" or even "my ex" whichever applies.
If my husband called me that he would be sleeping on the couch
Well make sure no one calls you that.
What does the father of your children call you or title you when explaining your relationship?
I have a cousin who has 3 children with 3 different men. She has only been married to one of them, so refers to him as her ex.. The others she says their name and says he is "A's" father or "B's" father. I was with her one time and someone asked her so who is A and B's mothers.. They did not realize they were her children.
In the big scheme of things....it's not a big deal at all. I have so much more to worry my mind with than a trivial phrase.
