Baby Not That Cuddly

It sounds like he may have a stomach issue that makes it more comfortable to stretch out. It could be simple gas. It could be reflux or something else, also. Perhaps you should mention this to the pediatrician.

Good luck.
L.

Hi B.!

Congratulations on your new bundle of love!! You are lucky to be a part of this site at this time, I've only just discovered it and my daughter is, sniff, already 2! Moms here are so wonderful at giving support and advice, and they really take extra time to do so.

Though he may not seem cuddly now, he is still brand new. Everything he does at this point is pure instict. He has no insecurities or feelings that have been thought out. He is simply doing what almost all babies do... sleep, eat and cry.

It's impossible and unnecessary to try and figure out some psychological reasoning behind this behavior. Your little man will soon be lighting your life with laughter, hugs and kisses. His needs are not that developed right now, but they will be soon. I thinks it's critical that you continue to try and snuggle him... though he might not be into it now, he can sense that his mom sill wants to cuddle and love him, no matter what. Nothing else is as important to him.

Down the road, if this behavior remains, remember: everyone is different. Don't let others make you feel badly if your baby is different than others - it's what makes him unique! There will be some other things about him that will make you want to burst with joy. We are who we are from the day we are born!

Have a wonderful time with your baby! There is nothing in the world as important as what you are doing. Try and remember, (my opinion only) you can't spoil a baby this age with too much love. Have fun, and let us all know how it turns out! K.

I am a mother who was dead set on always wearing my son in a sling and being a super cuddly family. Well when my son was born that all changed. He HATED TO be cuddled unless he was on the boob and would not go in a sling only a front carrier. He has always been a very active baby trying to crawl and 6 months cruiseing my 7 and now walking at 11. He would much rather be doing something then cuddleing. He wouldnt coe-sleep eather. Still at night when he wakes I will try and bring him into bed cause it would be easier for me and he fusses untill I put him into his own crib. It was really really weird for me...but now Ive just learned that is his personality. He learned to give kisses so now atleast he will stop to give a smooch every now and again. As always THE BOOKS LIE! As your child grows I strongly suggest the ERGO carrier. Its been a life saver for us. Good luck. Its totally normal unless he really wants nothing to do with you.

My first born was the same way except she preferred to be held facing the same direction as the carrier rather than over the shoulder. She loved to sit and watch things going on and only liked to be held if it enhanced her ability to see what was going on. She's five now and a wonderful child-very lovable in her own way. If your baby is hitting his milestones, it's probably just his personality.

If you want some close time with your son, maybe you could try lying next to him on your bed? That way he can be "not held" as he prefers, but then you can snuggle up to him while he's not looking and get some good skin to skin time with him :)

Some babies just aren't into some things, and at 7 weeks I think it's very early to tell. My son pretty much changed completely on a monthly basis.

My youngest son was exactly the same way. He never really seemed to enjoy being held-- he even hated being swaddled. Now,at 19 months, he is just starting to be a cuddle-bug, but only when he feels like it. He is extremely independent and throws a fit if someone tries to hug him when he doesn't want a hug...he's just got too much darn stuff to do! (LOL) Every child is different, so it's probably nothing to worry about. But my general rule is this: When in doubt, check it out. It never hurts to ask your child's doctor about it, that way if it is a reason for concern, you can have the issue evaluated. Good luck!

My daughter who is 5 months does not like being "cradled" like a baby either, she loves it when we hold her facing out so she can see everything and she will fall asleep with her head on my shoulder when facing me..maybe your son is just curious about the world around him..what does your pediatrician say?

My son is now 13 weeks and is starting to like to cuddly a little more. My son was like yours and was best not being held sitting in his swing. They get overstimulated this young and sometimes they just need to be left alone. Don't worry, before you know it you'll be wishing for the days when he didn't want to be held (at least that is what everyone tells me)!

B.,

my daughter is now 6 months old and she has never been very cuddly!! i see other babies who snuggle up to their mommas or i babysit for cuddly babies, and mine just isn't into it! from the start she just wants to be so independent!! she even doesn't like to fall asleep on us--she'd much rather fall asleep in her crib. some kids are just like that, i guess. we give her so much love and attention, everything she needs or wants, she gets. i stay home with her full-time. she's very happy and smiley, she just doesn't cuddle.

i know it's a bummer to hear, but we've come to terms with it. she's never going to be a snuggle-bunny...i guess instead we get to look forward to an independent, confident little girl. :)

B.,

My son was the same way when he was a baby. He did not want to be held any way except on my shoulder. He also used to roll over at that young age onto his stomach to sleep. Which used to cause me a lot of worry, because everyone said not to let a little baby sleep on their stomachs. What I later found out was that my son had asthma and it just was easier to breathe being over my shoulder or on his stomach, so he fussed every other way. I want to assure you that my son is fine and at 6 years old, extremely cuddly! Each baby is different, but believe me, they do go through stages of wanting to cuddle and not wanting to cuddle. My oldest hit the not wanting to cuddle point between 4-6 months. Then, he was as cuddly as ever. Could be that your little guy has a full tummy and it feels better to be leaning on it, too. But just know that it is not that he doesn't like you or to be held. He just has his own preferences. Good luck- C.

my son waslike that too.. he hated to be held when sleeping and wasn't very cuddly. it may mean absolutely nothing, it may mean something, but it's too early to tell, just enjoy him. If you are that worried, call your ped and discussit with them. He could have some tummy issues like reflux so the way you hold him could bother him so that could be something to look into. Does he throw up alot?? grunt?? stiffen up? Or maybe he just isn't a cuddly kid- my nephew was like that and he's 18 and perfectly healthy.

Hi B. I'm M.. I was reading what you have written and I might be able to offer some advice. The reason he might want to be held upright is because he is "gassy". My youngest daughter was that way as well. The only time she would craddle was when she was nursing. She had terrible "gassiness" (lol) and thatmade her very uncomfortable. I used to actually have to give her drops for it at one point. I would look into it, but honestly wouldn't worry myself too much. Every baby is different, and he might just have different needs is all. Lots of luck! And if you ever need to talk feel free to email me! :)

Some babies don't like to be cuddled because they can't see what's going on around them. He may be very curious about this new world and he wants to have a look around. Can you blame him. Have you tried holding him like a football. It's the same cuddle position but the baby faces out. Put his face/head in the crook of your elbow and hold him between his legs for support. Not for nothing, but be glad that your little guy lets you put him down. Lots of kids don't go for it. Being able to put him down means you can get lots more done with 2 hands.