Breastfeeding and Co-Sleeping

People get very worked about this topic and I'm not going to tell you what to do, but I will tell you what we did:

Both of my daughters breastfed on demand day or night until they were about a year when I moved to more regular and less frequent nursing for another couple years. Our oldest daughter slept in our bed until she was three, our youngest slept with us until she was two then she moved into her sister's bed. No trauma with weaning, no trauma with sleeping. It was a joy to have them be so close to us and it made us get experimental with out-of-the-bedroom sex. I highly recommend breastfeeding on demand and co-sleeping. It builds closeness, trust, and confidence, not clinginess, whining, or insecurity. Both of my daughters, now 8 and 6, are confident, wonderful, independent girls who love having their own bedroom but still come snuggle with us when the bad dreams come--it's a perfect situation.

Most importantly, don't worry what other people think. Trust yourself and trust your baby.

We just moved my third to her own bed. None of my three have had any problems adjusting to their own bed. Now, we never just threw them into their own rooms. We did this gradually and peacefully. We love the family bed and if you do, too, do not let others discourage you. Esp. for nursing such a small baby, it's the most convenient thing.

You seem concerned about the connection between nursing and sleeping. You can sometimes stop nursing when you know she is dozing and let her sleep without the breast. You can then start laying her down on your bed or in a bassinet. Again, as I said in my other post, she is so young right now, you don't have to be concerned with nursing her to sleep.

As she gets older, if this still concerns you, read Elizabeth Pantley's No Cry Sleep Solution. There's also a sleep class at http://www.bodymindandspiritabq.com
And there's the mother's group on the first fridays to help you feel confident and supported in your parenting choices. You sound like you are doing well to me and the only thing you should nip in the bud is well-intentioned family discouraging your parenting choices!

I also coslept and breastfed. My 4 yr old still won't go to bed on her own. I think I should have stopped the co-sleeping with the weaning. But who knows. Good luck

I just responded to your first post and then I saw this one. My "lazy nurser" also co-slept with me. I found that we both got a lot more sleep when we slept together. I moved her to her crib when she was about 4 months old. I waited until she was good at rolling from her tummy to back. The transition went a lot easier than I thought it would. For the first week I slept on a spare bed in her room, although this was more for my comfort than my daughter's.
Co-sleeping is something a lot of people have strong opinoins about and it always seemed to me that those against co-sleeping were a lot more vocal than those who were for it. If it feels right to you and works for you, don't let anyone force you out of it. It's wonderful way to bond with your little baby and let her know that you are always there for her. My daughter is now 4 and is a very independant, head-strong little girl, so don't worry about the argument that co-sleeping makes your children insecure. It's simply not true.

I received similar well intentioned advice to stop co-sleeping - or to not start it, but I did it anyway - it felt natural and was the only way to really get any sleep. Our daughter is now 21 months old and recently moved to her own bed without any problems (a few months ago). I was told by everyone it seemed that she would be sleeping in our bed forever and we really had no problem transitioning her. She still crawls into our bed from time to time in the middle of the night, but loves her own bed and room. So I say if it works for you to co-sleep and breastfeed continue doing what you doing and don't worry about the future- it will all work out. Also, I found traveling, camping, etc. is much easier with our daughter who is used to sleeping with us (and now also without us) than for my friends whose children never slept with them. Their children aren't used to it, so they won't fall asleep and then they have to make different arrangments for cribs, seperate rooms, etc. and camping is much more difficult. Whatever you decide - good luck! :)

My babies slept/sleep in the co-sleeper most the time at night and then I tend to bring her into bed for the last hour to help her sleep. You are going to get a lot of mixed answers because people believe strongly on both sides. So you need to think about if you want to have a toddler sleeping in your bed. Personaly I don't. I moved the first into her own room at 3 months (which really improved the amount of sleep we both got!) I doubt it's going to be a hard habit to break in a few months. My goal with the new baby is also to get her into her own room at a few months so thats why I have her sleep alone and try not to have her depend on me too much. But I don't think you can spoil a newborn...