Do people really sleep with their newborns? I would love to sleep with my baby, but I am way too scared it would hurt her. Do people really do this? Does your pediatrician know about it and what do they think about it? Just curious. I have accidently fallen asleep with her in my bed for tiny periods of time during the day, until my husband walked in and busted me and then scolded me for it, but I have never slept with her all night. What are your thoughts on it?
Well, I don't usually chime in on this stuff, but I'm in a mood today, so here goes..Yes, people DO sleep with their newborns. And unfortunately many of them subsequently come through my office to get autopsied. I see case after case of poor babies who's parents fell asleep while they were holding them, put them face down in a crib, or co-slept with blankets and pillows all over. It is always so sad to see, and SIDS/SUIDS is a very real thing. Almost EVERY case I've seen of SUIDS has been due to co-sleeping. I know there's lots of people who do these things and their babies are fine, but the fact is that it's risky. I have never met a doctor that says it's ok to do. It won't be happening in my house.
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L.S.
answers from
Los Angeles
on
I second buying a co-sleeper. You can usually pick up a really nice one on Craigslist for a fraction of the new price. By the way, I never discussed co-sleeping with my pediatrician; my thought was it was none of her business (seems everyone has an "opinion" on the matter). Nor do I discuss any particular behaviors of my child with her either, because she is a physician, not a behavior specialist.
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C.N.
answers from
Baton Rouge
on
I slept with my daughter when she was a newborn. We both slept better that way. I don't recall my pediatrician ever asking me where she slept - just how long she slept.
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C.J.
answers from
Lancaster
on
We've co-slept will all six of ours, from the day they were born until they were ready to move into their own beds. This ranges anywhere from 2-5 years old. Really, I've never had ANY trouble transitioning my kids into their own beds.
It's safe. Babies who co-sleep actually have a lower SIDS rate than those who sleep in a crib or a cradle. When you hear of a parent rolling over and killing their baby in the night, it's almost ALWAYS someone who was drunk/under the influence OR was taking some form of medication that put them too far out.
I'm a VERY heavy sleeper, to the point that my husband jokes that the rapture could happen and I'd miss it because I'd sleep through it. I've always been able to wake up in an instant for a baby, though. We mothers are very adaptable. ;)
Husbands are often more reluctant to let a baby co-sleep. They don't understand how HARD it is to be a new Mom and how much more well rested you can be if the baby is in the bed with you. For my first born, I was such a wreck, waking up every 15-20 minutes to make sure he was still breathing...With him in the bed, I was able to just wake up, glance at him, and then peacefully go back to sleep. Not to mention the ease of nursing AND the comfort it imparts to baby.
It's really a wonderful, wonderful thing. :)
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E.M.
answers from
Phoenix
on
Love love love the cosleeping! The idea of leaving my newborn in another room was far scarier for me! One of the most logical things that I have been told...are you afraid of rolling out of bed at night? No, because a part of your brain is still aware and tells you where the edge of the bed is. That part of your brain keeps track of baby, too. Alcohol or drugs could interfere with this and create a hazard.
We coslept with DS#1 until partway through my second pregnancy, when he was about 2.5. Part of preparing for baby #2 was making him a big boy room with a big boy bed. He transitioned quite easily. We occasionally have him sleep with us now, or he will come in and snuggle in the early morning. I love it and would not trade it for anything. It is only a handful of years that they want to be so close to us, why push them away???
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P.M.
answers from
Tampa
on
I slept with my #1 child since birth, she's almost 6 y/o and about to be permanently in her own bedroom by the time #2 comes in mid July... whom I will also co-sleep with from birth. The first few days, I had her in the carrier - to adjust, then right into bed with me. This is great for bonding, positive touching, breastfeeding, and skin to skin newborns need so much (older children do too!)
About the pediatrician's opinion - I could really care less. Most are just as ignorant about attachment parenting, co-sleeping and breastfeeding anyways - in which I feel I have much more education and research on - so I don't bother asking their opinions. They are there to keep my child healthy thru vaccines, preventative care and sick visits - that's it - not to raise my child.
***ADDED***
Before you allow everyone's here-say or 'personal' experience of a baby dying from SIDS in the family bed - I highly recommend you research it. Bed-sharing with adults who are not into prescription or recreational drugs, overly fatigued from too much work or drinking have a very LOW risk for SIDS. Most SIDS deaths are in the USA and that is mainly because a newborn takes it's breathing cues from Mommy... the same Mommy who's body they were in for almost 10 months listening to her heartbeat and breathing pattern. In countries where co-sleeping (same room but different bed) and bed-sharing are prevalent in (like Europe, Japan, China, etc) SIDS is not as common an issue for infant mortality.
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F.H.
answers from
Phoenix
on
no, and if you are on here long enough you will see all the moms asking for advice on how to get their kids out of their bed and into their own. its not an easy habit to break once you start it. the best advice i got when pregnant was to never rock your baby to sleep, always put it to bed awake and put it in the crib, not your bed. i did that and both my kids slept thru the night the first week they were home from the hospital. they are now 11 and 8 and have always been great sleepers. and more importantly, i have always gotten my sleep. good luck.
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C.S.
answers from
Milwaukee
on
My ped put it to us this way-people have been co-sleeping with their babies for a verrry longggg time. Think Little House on the Prairie-it was a way to keep everyone warm and back then there weren't necessarily seperate bedrooms, etc.
If you do it correctly-it's safe. If you dig deep into the news reports where people have slept on or smothered their babies-almost always alchohl, drugs, etc have been a factor.
Now-I was never 100% comfortable with my husband and I both being in the bed-that made me nervous, but if it was just my baby and I-I moved the pillows away from them, curled my body around them so I could feel them and their movements and made sure the blankets were far enough down that they wouldn't get pulled on top of them.
It's one of the snuggliest, sweetest things you can do with your baby I think.
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E.S.
answers from
Dayton
on
As long as you're breastfeeding and are not a super heavy sleeper, obese or a smoker, I see no problem w/ it.
I/we slept w/ both of our newborns. We have a king sized bed...
Baby slept in the crook of my arm.
Summer is great for co-sleeping w/ a small infant since you don't need covers like in the winter.
I never asked for my pediatricians opinion because it was none of their business.
My DH was super nervous w/ our first but eventually he grew to love having our kids in bed w/ us.
I LOVED taking naps w/ my first. No naps w/ my 2nd but he is a better night time sleeper.
I need sleep. That's the bottom line for me. I tried the whole get up and sit and nurse thing w/ my first and I was miserable. So was she.
Hope this helps a little.
Maybe you can take DH to this website and let him read some of the awesome articles: http://www.drmomma.org/
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T.S.
answers from
San Francisco
on
I slept with all three of my kids until they were about 6 to 8 months old. I never could have survived getting up several times a night to feed and change a baby, especially those first 3 to 4 months, I would have been a zombie! (I breastfed and kept diapers/wipes on the nightstand.)
As long as the bed is safe (not too many fluffy pillows and blankets) and as long as no one goes to bed drunk or on heavy medication, it should be fine. If your husband has a problem with it put him in charge of night time feedings!
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B.C.
answers from
Los Angeles
on
My wife co-slept with our last two. BAD IDEA ! ! ! ! Its more convenient when nursing, but having a three year old getting up in the middle of the night to crawl into bed with you is bad, but when they do it because they wet the bed, its awful. Occasionally, they will wet the bed in our bed and that was even worse.
The ease of nursing isn't worth the problem of getting them to sleep in their own bed. (My opinion and my wife's opinion.)
Good luck to you and yours.
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L.S.
answers from
Spokane
on
Saved my sanity!!! I started sleeping with my oldest daughter in the hospital. I just made sure she wasn't too hot and kept the blankets only up to her legs. I loved it! I barely had to wake up to nurse her; I could just lift my shirt and fall back asleep while she nursed for as long as she wanted - EVERYONE slept better. I slept better knowing she was warm and cozy and she rarely woke at night (except to latch on for nursing). I slept with her in the crook of my arm so I knew her head wasn't getting smushed into a pillow or anything.
I didn't sleep with my younger two from birth because I still had a toddler in bed with me and was worried *she* would roll onto her sister, but started around 10 months.
Admittedly, it's not for everyone. But I love the closeness and bonding.
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C.B.
answers from
Los Angeles
on
We did! And we loved it. Including my husband, because neither of us had to wake up to a crying baby. You are still very aware that a little one is next to you, even when you are sleeping, and every time one of my babies got restless, I would wake up, start breastfeeding them right away and they would settle down and we'd both get much more sleep. We didn't have a bedframe on our bed, so we had the mattress and boxspring directly on the floor so that our bed wasn't too high. They both transitioned to their own beds (toddler beds next to us) at 2 1/2 years old and went to their own rooms at three years old. I don't regret it and plan to do it with any future children we might have.
For me, it just made sense to have my baby close to me while we were sleeping. They would never settle down in their crib, but always settled down next to me, and my husband was happy because again, no crying baby at night. As long as you use common sense (like "Don't go to bed drunk with your baby" is really a no-brainer), you should do it. Don't necessarily follow your pediatrician because there are many people who are against cosleeping even though it works for many families. Go with what feels right to you. If it makes you too nervous, then stick with what makes you feel better. If you try it and like it, then keep doing it. Trust your instincts! And congrats on your new little one!
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M.G.
answers from
Chicago
on
I chose not to due to the increased risk of SIDS and/or suffocation. I read a story in the newspaper about a woman who sued a hospital because she fell asleep with her baby in bed and suffocated her daughter to death. She was upset that the nurses didn't come find her sleeping with her baby and stop it from happening.
If you think about what we do to make sure the crib is safe (firm mattress, no blankets, no pillows), why would you put your baby in a bed with all of these items? I did breastfeed, too, but I wouldn't be able to forgive myself if something ever happened.
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K.M.
answers from
Chicago
on
We co slept. My son had acid reflux and could not sleep on his back, even with that wedge thing from birth. I even had to learn to change his diaper on his belly b/c he writhed in pain flat on his back. Heck, by 1mo I could change a pee diaper while holding him b/c of this! Back to co sleeping - I started in what used to be a comfy recliner chair with him wraped in my moby wrap (like being swaddled). With this, he was not going to fall off of my chest, should he wake up hungry it was an easy transition to nursing, he was on his tummy at a good angle for his reflux to not be an issue while sleeping. Our doctor was aware, he was not a fan but he also gave me "co-sleeping safety" hand outs so we could keep him safe. Once my little one was confidently mobile we started taking naps in bed (he was never a great sleeper but got better when he was in our bed) ... and once we were all good, it became a nightly thing. I think by 6-7 months we were out of the now uncomfortable recliner for good!
And my son is 4.5 and still co sleeps, the nice thing is that he will fall asleep in his room (in bed or on couch in his room he likes couches) and around midnight he joins us in bed, giving daddy and I time to sleep together or other things before the party is crashed.
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S.B.
answers from
Chicago
on
I started having my son sleep in our bed when he was a few weeks old. Breastfeeding was much easier this way, especially since laying down to breastfeed was the easiet position for us. There is actually nothing wrong with doing this, I read on Dr. Sears' website that the danger factor is pretty low because moms are hyper aware of their child sleeping next to them and pretty unlikely to roll onto them. Daddies can be a different story though, so make sure there is enough space between. You can also get a little bassinet type thing that goes in your bed between the two of you, but it's got raised sides to protect the baby and keep him in one place. Of course, if you've been drinking or taking any medication that causes drowsiness, it's never a good idea to have baby in bed. But in most cases it's generally safe. Here's a link to some info on safe co-sleeping:
Done it and love it. Next baby I'm wanting to get a co-sleeper. It looks just like a pack and play but it attaches to your bed so that the baby can have their own space, but when it's feeding time you can scoot them over. :D
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L.P.
answers from
Pittsburgh
on
I know you've gotten a lot of responses, and I'm probably repeating, but anyhow, here goes.
You CAN co-sleep safely. There are many precautions you can take that makes co-sleeping with your baby actually safer and healthier than having them sleep alone.
However, *falling asleep* with your baby next to you, or in a chair, etc. IS dangerous.
When I had my son 5 1/2 years ago, I was adamantly against sleeping with an infant. But out of necessity (extreme sleep deprivation), I discovered co-sleeping. Did a ton of research about it, and decided that it was the best option for us. And I've never looked back. It gave me my much needed sleep, my son slept better, and the bonding experience was immeasurable.
If you feel as though you want to do it, do your research and make SURE you are doing it safely, not just falling asleep with your baby in your bed.
www.askdrsears.com is a wonderful website, a family of pediatricians, who favor attachment parenting, and SAFE cosleeping. They don't preach it, but they do advocate doing it safely. Check it out.
Best wishes to you and whatever you decide.
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A.W.
answers from
Kalamazoo
on
I fell asleep with my babies in my bed nursing many times. I just slept so light with them that I didn't worry about it much. When I would wake up, I would put them in the bassinet (they slept in our room in the bassinet for the first 2-3months. Once they were in their own rooms after that, I would fall asleep in the wooden rocking chair in their room while nursing!
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M.R.
answers from
Chicago
on
If you really need to sleep with the baby close to you, I would highly recommend using an attached co-sleeper or a bassinet. One of my friends who is a police officer and lost her child to SIDS is now the go-to officer when 911 is called because a family has lost their child during the night due to SIDS (every time co-sleeping in the same bed was involved). It doesn't happen often at all, but - and this may just be me - a handful of times per year would be enough to make me not want to take that risk.
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K.I.
answers from
Oklahoma City
on
We did and still doing it with our third one, my ped know it but she seems to ignore it and talk to me as I keep her in her crib , I really don't know why, I breastfeed so is easy for me, I have never hurt any one , and the only time that I wake up scared because she was to deep in my side , was only one second and as soon I move my body she just smile and keep asleep, she loves to be very warm...she's now 2 months old..
Good luck and enjoy your little one.
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C.S.
answers from
New York
on
My little guy has been in my bed since the day he came home from the hospital. My other 2 were fine in a bassinet or crib. Not my 3rd. He needed that bond with me to sleep. My choice was either to allow it so we can all sleep, or spend the better part of the night leaned over the crib patting his back. I would much rather get cozy with my baby and get some sleep!
Not all kids will take to co-sleeping. My daughter really needed her own sleep space. She was breastfed, but at night she wanted to be left alone. I had to respect that.
So, I would say do what is best for you AND your baby.
Also, a great read is Dr Sears Attachment Parenting book. It has a lot of insights into newborns and their needs.
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M.M.
answers from
Washington DC
on
Weve done it with all four. I nursed three of them so it was just easier. When they napped they slept in the bassinet.
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A.D.
answers from
Norfolk
on
My babies wouldn't sleep anywhere else but on my chest or in the crook of my arm for the first 4 or 5 months of their lives, so they definitely slept in bed with me. It just seemed like the natural thing to do, I couldn't put them down while they were sleeping because they would wake right back up or I would lie awake and stare at them wiggling around and crinkling up their little faces looking for their "safe spot" (me.) They both sleep just fine on their own now (2.5 years old and 9 months old). I don't see why it would matter if the pediatricians knew or not, they're not my childs' parents or god for that matter, they're doctors.
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A.B.
answers from
Pittsburgh
on
This was probably when he was 8+ mos - I would never have tried w/a newborn - I'm not comfortable with it and my husband was VERY nervous about it bc he's a very sound sleeper and was afraid he'd roll over on him.
We've traveled a lot so we actually tried this to be close to DS and I had to laugh...I had these romantic ideas of all of us cuddled in bed together and it was the total opposite of that! It was pretty much the WORST night's sleep any of us ever had, lol! He rolled and kicked everywhere and we ended up on the edges of the bed, sore and bleary-eyed in the morning. So much for that!
Even without co-sleeping, one of my favorite memories was the mornings. When DS would wake up early, I'd always go get him from his crib, pull him into bed with us to nurse while I dozed and then we'd start our day. The memories of holding him while being held by my husband are some of my most cherished ones. =)
That said, he always slept really well in his crib and we had a nice schedule bc of it - he would go down around 7 and my husband and I still had some alone time each day. I never understood how people did this - did they go to bed at 7pm or keep their kids up until they went to bed? I don't really approve of the latter bc I think a healthy sleep schedule is really important, but every family is different.
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S.P.
answers from
New York
on
I did not co-sleep when she was brand new, but within a month or so. I created a separate space for her on our firmest bed, kept my blankets to an absolute minimum, and had one pillow, kept well away from her. Later, we moved a mattress onto the floor and put exercise mats all around.
I think you can co-sleep safely, but you do have to be careful. Think about all the possibilites, and attempt to minimize them. Is it as safe as a crib? Probably safer than a drop-side, given all the recalls!
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K.C.
answers from
Orlando
on
With a newborn I wouldn't for the same reason you said. I was to scared I would hurt them. When my daughter was about a year and a half she started having nightmares and we co slept for awhile, until she was ready to sleep on her own, and it was awesome for us.
I know quite a few moms that co slept from birth and all was fine, I was just to scared to do it.
UPDATED: My dad is a Crime Scene Detective and just this week they had a case (he wasn't on it, but his department was) where a sleep deprived mom rolled onto her three month old. The baby did not survive. This was family with two older children in a middle class home. The child was obviously loved and cared for. Mom was just to tired to realize what had happened, until it was to late. IF you choose to co-sleep, please be CAREFUL!!!!
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M.F.
answers from
Youngstown
on
I co slept with my newborns. You don't sleep very soundly. I will say it's hard to get them in their own beds and my baby wanted to nurse all night long and eventually started to pull up my shirt...I didn't tell my pediatrician I saw no reason to. She is the dr of my children not the decison maker. I always recomend not co sleeping because eventaully you don't want the baby in your bed and it's tough to break the habit BUT I have had all three of my kids in bed with me as newborns and then around age one put them in the crib wich was hard...
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C.J.
answers from
Milwaukee
on
Mine is four and we still co-sleep and have since he was seven months old. He slept in a Moses basket/cradle or his crib when he was first born.
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A.C.
answers from
Wichita
on
.
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S.F.
answers from
Utica
on
Personally I am not pro co-sleeping but thats just me. However if you are afraid to roll on your baby they make actual sleepers/beds/cots that you put in your bed that creates a sleeping space for your baby and 'helps' to prevent you from rolling on you little one
I think you can buy them at most large retailers
Good Luck
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M.L.
answers from
Chicago
on
I didn't sleep with a newborn in my bed but did have both kids in a pack n play in our room so when they woke up I didn't have to walk too far. My daughter started sleeping 6-8 hours a night from the time she was 8 weeks old but at a year all of a sudden the sleep issues started (I think due to separation anxiety) - about two months of her waking up every hour and we started just putting her to sleep in her crib and then *when* she woke up we'd bring her in our room.
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M.P.
answers from
Raleigh
on
For the first three weeks of my baby girl's life, she slept with me. I had some back pain from delivery and slept propped on one of those husbands. She slept right there on my chest. After three weeks, she got too heavy, and moved to her crib. I figured this is my last baby, and I am going to do what I want. We all slept great. I didn't really care what anyone else thought, so I didn't ask for opinions or comments! :)
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S.R.
answers from
Kansas City
on
We didn't sleep with ours right in the bed alone. They were both in moses baskets or something similar in the bed. I was always too scared of rolling over on them. It is so much easier when you breastfeed, although there were a few times with my daughter I fell asleep while nursing her and woke up with half of the bed soaked in breastmilk. Really- my half of the bed would be just soaked.
My son is 3 and still sleeps with us although I'm ready to kick him out soon. My daughter will be 2 this month and does not sleep well with others, the only place she will sleep is her bed.
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E.G.
answers from
Jackson
on
We moved her to her room when she was about a month old. I was not able to sleep. We had her in a basinett on mine side. Then his. Then to her room she is a noisy sleeper and will waked cry then fall back asleep. I was never getting any rest we had to put her in her room.
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L.A.
answers from
Dallas
on
Yes, we sleep with our babies. No, we never made a point of telling our pediatrician because it's not a big deal for us.
With our first daughter, she had such severe colic that when she finally passed out in our arms we just crawled in bed w/ her. I certainly wasn't going to try and get her into a crib after 3 hours of screaming.
Our second daughter is easy-peasy but she has a restless period around 4am. If we can't soothe her easily, we just bring her into bed with us.
I napped with both babies in part because I couldn't relax with them in their beds but mostly because it felt natural to do so. Especially with the first baby. When she was sleeping I wasn't going to do much else so why not lay down too?
You WILL NOT roll on top of your baby as long as you are not taking medications, etc. We slept with our daughter right between us. And we stopped easily too (some people worry about how to wean off of co-sleeping). When she started kicking us at night and/or our movements would wake her up, we moved her to the crib next to our bed. When our movements woke up her there, she moved to her own room. The younger baby had no problems not sleeping in our arms once we stopped using the bassinet. She just didn't like the mattress in the pack n play, I think.
In response to the concerns about suffocation/SIDS: We did take certain precautions. The blankets were NEVER above our waists (leaving several inches before the were anywhere near the baby) and she was positioned below our shoulders, keeping her far away from the pillows. We also made sure one of us physically held her the whole time - as in, she'd sleep on my hubby's arm for a while and if he needed to get up, I'd take over.
I'm not saying there aren't things to watch out for but if it feels right and you pay attention to HOW you do it, then be with your baby!!!
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A.F.
answers from
Fargo
on
There is absolutely nothing wrong with co-sleeping. It made me miserable so we had to stop, but both my hubby and I still would answer every cry during the night. Every night our kids were in bed with us, I would wake up with a migraine and be out of commission for the rest of the day.
If it works for you then it's not bad and not a mistake! It's never a mistake to make your baby feel secure and loved, no matter the method! :)
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M.B.
answers from
Lancaster
on
I co slept with my first daughter because she wouldn't sleep any other way. I didn't sleep very soundly and was always aware of her being there. Didn't feel safe doing it with DD #2 because I was so exhausted and sleeping too deeply. I didn't tell the pediatrician because I know the medical community's "official line" on co-sleeping
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K.A.
answers from
San Diego
on
From the day they were born, if that's how we got sleep that night then they slept with us, if we got sleep with them in their crib that's how we slept another night, if they slept in our arms in the rocking chair that's how we slept on a different night. If they would only sleep propped on our chest on the couch that's how we slept that night. Sometimes we even pick a few options in the same night LOL
We put my youngest between us and took off the middle pillow (king bed with 3 standard pillows) and set her below the pillow line so she'd be directly on the mattress and kept the covers away from her completely. With the other 2 we had a Queen bed so we'd put them below the pillow line and scooted the pillows as far to the edges as we could anyway.
The doctor never asked so I never even thought to mention it. They only ask what time they go to bed and what time they get up in the morning, not where they get that sleep.
All 3 of my children can sleep anywhere and everywhere. They sleep fine when we go out, they sleep in their own beds a lot of the time but they also know that they are welcome to climb into our bed if they need that added security now and again.
If it gets you both some much needed sleep that put that baby in bed with you and sleep!
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K.H.
answers from
Sacramento
on
I have coslept and still cosleep with all of mine. My older ones all under 5 go to bed in their own rooms but by morning we are all piled into one bed. When they were newborn I took special precautions but if I hadn't coslept I would be a zombie. Anyway it just felt and still feels like the right thing to do. I would feel like a lazy uncaring mother if I put my newborn or denied my other little ones the comfort and security of mommy and daddy especially at night when their little imaginations run wild in another room all by themselves. Oh and I am constantly being praised on how independent my little ones are.
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K.B.
answers from
Dallas
on
Before I had kids I said I would never cosleep.....and then I had two kids who wouldn't sleep unless they were touching me. We did it safely with covers at the waist and only for the first few months, but I would never have been able to sleep if we hadn't. Now I have amazing memories of my babies snuggled up next to me that I wouldn't trade for anything in the world.
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K.S.
answers from
Columbus
on
Wow, talk about scare tactics, Mama2B. I understand that things happen & it's is incredibly sad & usually avoidable. What were the circumstances of those poor babies deaths? As Lee P. said, co-sleeping CAN be done safely. Take the time to take the precautions. Don't just fall asleep. Don't drink, smoke, etc.
We did it with our 2nd almost from birth & at 4 she is sleeping in her own bed. Yes, it was a slow process to get her to her own bed, but we were prepared for that as well. It was very beneficial to all of us because she wasn't sleeping. Sleep is also very important to all of us.
Do your research and then decide what is right for you & your family. There are several different ways to do it.
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S.2.
answers from
Bakersfield
on
I have slept with my 6week old daughter every night home from the hospital until this Thursday. She managed to sleep in her bassinet for a whopping 4hrs. Then it was awake and time for feeding (I'm nursing exclusively).
For me personally sleeping with her is easier for nursing. All I have to do is scoot her over a tad and she latches on to the breast and usually falls right back asleep under my arm. Once shes in a good deep sleep i scoot her a safe distance away and I return back to sleep. This made life especially easy when we first got outta the hospital and she was feeding around the clock. Also, when my baby was born she was placed directly on my skin for at least an hour. It seems like every since that she'll sleep more sound near my chest. Of course during the day she'll sleep in her bassinet her little rocker, the couch, almost anything. But, at night aka her fussy hour its so much easier for the both of us. If she cuddles right up under me. She sleeps much longer.
Now as to the safety concerns.. I think if you know your a hard sleeper or if your one of those people who swing and kick in bed then you should accept that and let your baby sleep away from you. I however, wake up when she's cooing. So, I'm pretty confident in the fact that i'm not a hard sleeper. Now her dad on the other hand is very much a hard sleeper. This is why temporarily dad and I sleep in different bedrooms.
My pediatrician said it was fine! As long as you haven't been drinking and you feel absolutely comfortable with it. I mean just think about the women around the world who can't afford expensive cribs or bassinets? What do they do?
I'm just worried that I might have to be weaned from cosleeping along with my baby.
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C.T.
answers from
New York
on
Hi Molly-
I am going to jump in on this topic too. :-) I skimmed the responses so what I am going to say does not seem to be anything too new but I'm in a talktive mood...
I co-splet with all three of my kiddies but it wasn't a constant thing. As a BFing Mama, I found that some nights it was just easier. There were nights when the Baby wanted to latch and suckle ALL night otherwise there was a screaming fest all night and usually Hubby was working overtime to cover my missing income so he had to get his sleep. To make the co-sleeping work, I would move to the guest room and limit the blankets and pillows to only what I needed. This generally occurred only a few nights when they were really little.
The Baby's primary sleeping quarters (until about 8 weeks) were a cradle directly near my bed. This allowed me to reach in, pick up baby, nurse and then put them back in a safe place. I avoided my own bed because if I brought the baby into the bed, and Hubby didn't know, I was worried about him rolling over on us.
Now, with an older infant (about 4 months), she sleeps in the nursery but comes into my room at night so we can nurse sitting in the rocking chair. I am committed to getting her to sleep in her crib in the nursery and feeding her then placing her back into the empty crib seems to have worked best for my kids. I cannot begin to tell you the number of times that we fall asleep together in the chair (and this isn't just occurring during the night feedings either).
Generally, if Hubby finds us together - in bed or the chair - he will pick up Baby, put them in their bed then let me continue resting. When he picks up the baby, I usually startle. I do not think a Mama ever truly sleeps when she is with her Baby like that. I think you are still very much aware, but, once I realize what is going on, I just slip back into resting/sleeping.
I don't think the "scolding" is necessary. To sleep with ones child is a very natural instinct and I think that instead, falling asleep together should be recognized as a sign for needing more rest - for BOTH of you - Baby and Mama. Your husband should be gentler about it and offer a helping hand instead!