Dallas Area Sleep Advice

Just a thought from a grandmother... what about the food he is getting... could be lactose intolerant if you are giving him milk making sleep difficult if he seems uncomfortable. Other food allergies possible???

Hello!
One of my clients is a pediatric sleep specialist! Her name is Dr. Hilary Baldwin and her office has a website.

http://www.pediatricsleepinstitute.com/

I hope she can help you!

C.,

I only have a 2 week old, but last night my husband and I watched a DVD called DUNSTAN BABY LANGUAGE. This lady from Australia has a photographic memory from sound and when she had her son, she recognized patterns in his cries...basically she has put together this DVD showing the 5 sounds "words" that a baby makes and you should instantly be able to soothe them based on their needs. It worked for us last night when my daughter woke up and she was making one of the sounds, we knew we needed to burp her, so immediately we did and she went back to sleep. This may not work for you, but I think it is pretty interesting, I am going to keep testing it out, as it has only been a day, but seems great so far.

I have had two kids, and my son used to be that way, i know this is going to sound odd to u, but, i am not telling you to do this, but it worked for me, try to put a little of cereal, like rice , but mix just a little bit in his milk, or befor you go to bed or dinner time, start feeding him some like mash potatoes,i dont mean baby mash potatoes, make them from potatoes, or make some insant potatoes, i was told by my mother, that there little bodies are not getting full off that milk, so i started feeding my son mash potatoes, and little of people food, and well, my son is going on 19, and eats up everything now, or if that dont work, your baby might need to get the secure feel of the crib, i never used a crib, my son did not like it either, so he slepted in the bed with us,the babies feel ya body heat, that makes them secure, then when they get older, u know like a year old or so, then work them over in to there cribs or baby beds, oh and naps, i wouldnt worry about him taking a nap, the more u give them a nap, that makes them not tired anymore, which makes them wake up alot, there bodies are not tired, take and put him in the floor on a blanket, let them crawl around, or help them crawl around and play, or put him in a walker, just let him run all over the house, or if not any of that, hold his little hands, let him walk in between your legs, i know this sounds weird to you, but it worked for me, well, i hope i have helped you,,

I have two sets of twins, ages 4.5 and 19 mo. I hate to tell you this, but my children never ever slept well at night at that age. Couple of things to look into - is it possible that he is having reflux or stomach upset? Or could he be teething? The crying it out method never worked with my children, and with twins, I finally decided that if I wanted sleep, I would have to give in to sleep props and co-sleeping. I use a rocker to get my children to go to sleep. When they woke during the night at the age of your child, I would take them out of the crib (so they would not wake the other twin), give them a bottle, change their diaper, and sit in a comfy chair with them, where usually they would eventually fall to sleep after having their bottle and then I could take them back to bed. At some point when they were older, I would let them sleep with me. My boys have no interest in sleeping with me and now at 19 mos will usually sleep mostly through the night, with possibly just one waking each. Try to make sure that you get him up in the morning at a consistent time even if he has not slept well, and try to get a consistent routine as far as eat, play, nap during the day. but consider that he may really be having physical issues that are causing him problems with sleeping - stomach upset or teething, and talk to your pediatrician about that - you may need to switch formulas. feel free to email with questions - I am by no means an expert and I often feel a failure because I do have to resort to sleep props and co-sleeping and they still don't sleep through the night til much older, but I think much of that has to do with the child and his or her nature and you gotta do what you gotta do. One pediatrician did remind me that we are the only mammals that expect our young to sleep separately from us. By the way, my 4 year old twins now have no trouble sleeping in their own bed and the transition was not traumatic once they reached 3 or so. Hang in there; it does get better although it's hard to see the light when you are sleep deprived. There are night nannies that you can hire but it's pretty expensive and to me it's not worth it once you hit 5 months.

C.--

I'm sure you're tired of reading responses, but like one other mommy mentioned...some babies just sleep better than others. Unfortunately both of my babies were difficult. I have a 3 yr.old and 8 month old daugther. She's been "colicky" since the early weeks. Come to find out around 4 months, she's lactose/soy intollerant, so I had to eliminate all milk and soy from my diet. I must say it did help the sleep issue a bit, but she's still not sleeping through the night and don't think she will for a VERY long time :(

I will say that getting her on a schedule helped (but is hard to keep when there's a 2nd child in the picture). She was also swaddled up utnil about a few weeks ago. If you haven't tried the "miracle blanket," it's GREAT!!! Also, about the naps. It took me a week of trying.....I'd start her "naptime routine" when she showed signs of being tried (fussiness, rubbing eyes, etc.) and/or been awake for about 2 hours. I'd lay her down and then walk out. She'd cry (wail) for a little while, then I'd go in and cuddle her once again and lay her down again....after a few days of this routine. She finally realized that sleeping in the crib wasn't that bad. But we still have days where she fights it and definitely tests my patience!!!! You've just got to stick with it :) It's tough hearing your little one cry. The "cry it out" method definitely won't work for my daughter. She's got some great lungs!

Best of luck.

Oh, honey, I feel your pain! My 3 1/2 year old put us through the same thing. It took us an hour to get him to sleep at night and then he would wake up at least once every night. He would never take a nap unless he was held the whole time. We tried letting him cry it out, he could scream for 2 solid hours and then make himself puke. We read all the books and tried everything. Everyone had a ton of advice which never worked. I thought there was something seriously wrong with me as a mother. All the other mom's could get their babies to sleep, why couldn't I? Plus the strain of no sleep was hard on my marriage.
Finally, we stumbled across a gastroenterologist who prescribed Prevacid and within days, he was sleeping through the night regularly. It turned out that he had acid reflux and was in pain every time he was laid down. I don't know if that is your son's problem, but if you haven't checked it out yet, you should call Dr. Annette Whitney in Dallas ###-###-####). She is a pediatric gastroenterologist. We were actually referred to her due to my son's constant sinus infections. It didn't fix his sinus trouble, but the sleep was a great unexpected bonus! We didn't discover the source of his problem until he was 2 1/2. Don't wait that long. Good luck with your son. I truly sympathize. On a much happier note, my younger son started sleeping all the way though the night at 3 months and goes to bed without incident. If you are considering adding to your family, the odds of getting 2 difficult sleepers is pretty slim.

Hi C.!

I experienced a similar situation with my 4 yr old. Difference is that he used to be awake crying nonstop for a couple of months after birth. I took him to the hospital so many times and Dr's would tell me its cramps on his stomach. I got to the point where I was fustrated and depressed about the situation. One day I decided to take him to Church and have a Pastor pray for him and out Holy Water on him. C., that night I drove home scared that it would be another tuff night. My son slept all night and never cried that way again. Today he is a healthy 4!! My advise to you is go to the Lord's house ask with all your heart for this to stop, he loves his children. There will be a change that day!!!!!

5 months is about the age for sleep training so don't despair, it is going to get better. We used the program found in a book called, "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child and I recommend it often. You can find it on-line. Dr. Marc Weissbluth is the author. http://www.amazon.com/Healthy-Sleep-Habits-Happy-Child/dp...

One thing I've learned is that babies do not just go to sleep when they're tired. Much like adults the adrenaline kicks in and gears them up for whatever seems interesting. then trying to get them to go down when they've got extra chemicals swimming in their brain is very difficult. After we read through this book - just the parts that mattered to our daughter's age - we began to play the game. We'd look for sleep cues and put her right to sleep. Our lowest time was 22 seconds from awake to asleep! You really can catch them right at the moment of sleepiness and put them right to bed and they'll sleep. I know it seems impossible, but to those people who get this book, read it, and apply it ... I've heard nothing but kudos. we've used it on our son also and both kids are great sleepers - 12 to 14 hours per night.

I Googled Dr. Weissbluth to get the above link. Then I took a look at the reviews. More than 1,000 people reviewed and over 700 of them at 5 stars. even many of those agreed with the lesser star reviews that you must treat each child as an individual and nothing straight out of a book will work; however, having this helped us develop a road map that has brought success.

Enough - my best to you and your family.

Hi C.,I am no expert and each baby is different. I have a 20 month old and I had to go back to work after 3 months. My son breast fed and we started ceral around 4 months as a late night feeding, hoping to keep his little tummy full. I will have to tell you that my doctor said it's pretty normal for babies to wake up in the middle of the night, espically for a feeding. I recal Alex finally sleeping through the night around 8 months. It was very hard, my husband had to help me. I would pump the night feeding and he would get up so I could get some rest. I thought I was not going to make it, but I did. I purchased a book that has been a life savor to us, I suggest it to you. This book has really helped our family get more sleep and realize that sleep is very important, so is a schedule. The name of the book is, Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child, by Marc Weissbluth, M.D. They also wrote, Fussy Baby. Another great book.

Hope this helps,
N.

The one book that saved our sanity was Dr. Harvey Karp's The Happiest Baby on the Block. He shares some tips (the 5 S's) that help calm any baby--it's actually an inborn reflex reaction that babies have to calm them down!! The DVD version is a quick watch, and perhaps even better than the book--a sleep-deprived brain can take in a video better than the written (sleepy) word. :-)

Another thought is the Amby Hammock, recommended by Dr. Sears. It's an alternative to a crib that helps re-create the comfort and security of the womb. I loved it! It's a sling-type hammock suspended from a heavy-duty spring. Basically, whenever the baby stirs or moves the hammock bounces and the baby is lulled back to sleep. I could even bounce it with my hand in my sleep--it's compact enough to fit by the bed. You can usually find them on ebay, or just google "Amby".

Do you ever wear Mason in a sling? My babies always slept better if I got in a lot of physical touch during the day. The days I wore them on my body a lot were the days I got the most rest at night. I even learned to carry one on my back--a great way to cuddle AND get some things done. If you're interested, there are babywearing groups that meet all over the metroplex to help you learn the tips and tricks. Also, mamatoto.org is a great reference source for babywearing.

One other idea: cosleeping with each of my two babies really worked for us. I breastfed, and because of having them in bed with me I could calm them down almost before they woke up enough to get upset. It got to where I could nurse them, almost asleep, with me asleep, too. :-) Cosleeping not for everyone, but something about having Mom there to cuddle helps reassure babies like nothing else. There are also some studies to indicate that cosleeping reduces the incidence of SIDS (of course, done safely: no loose blankets or pillows near baby, no gaps between bed and headboard, no drug-influenced parents who could roll over on baby). There's a cosleeping "bed" you can buy at Babies 'R Us...it's a little box with one end open (for the baby's feet) that helps give a sort of mini-crib for the baby right there in your bed. It really helped me get over the fear of rolling onto my babies, because they had little walls around them.

I am obviously a believer in attachment parenting, and gratefully did not have to go back to a 40-hour-week job after my kids were born. I understand what lack of sleep can do to a brain, especially after a total of 4 years without a full 8-hour night's sleep! (my kids started sleeping through the night at about 20 months, and they're 25 months apart...you get the picture). But you know that you will find a way through this...kudos to you for looking for advice! Perhaps you can share some of the babywearing ideas with your caregiver...I know that when I kept a friend's baby for her to go back to work, wearing the baby helped her feel more secure with me--and she ended up being a great sleeper at night! Whatever you choose, please trust your mothering instincts--they are the best guide among all the sometimes overwhelming information and advice out there. All the best to you and your family in your quest for sleep!

I started the rice cereal(just a bit) in the bottle right before bedtime with all of my kids at 2 months old. My last never slept one single night through, God is my witness, until she was 2 years old. I know when they are infants, it's harder to let them cry it out, plus others in the house have to get some sleep. My advice to you would be to try this:
warm bath with a lavendar baby wash.
fresh diaper, massage with lotion, warm swaddleing clothes.
feeding with formula/breastmilk and the rice cereal added.
rock to sleep, or if that doesn't work, then lay into crib.
Leave a dim light, such as a nightlight or the carousel lights with shapes on the ceiling.
Try one of the sound makers with the soothing sounds of waves, or wind, etc.
(have a glass of wine for yourself) :-)
I swear to you, this is the best routine I could do for my other children.
My last, FIFTH child did not want to make it easy for me. She would go to sleep at night, However, she always woke up atleast once for me to get her a bottle or rub her back until she was back to sleep. I even tried just putting her in my bed, she still woke up atleast once a night. I thought I was losing my mind. However, she finally gave up once I didn't respond to her every beck and call. Good luck to you. One thing to know, he will grow out of it! Hopefully sooner than later for your sanity's sake :-)

C. M,

Many moms on this site have had that same trouble and I will say you have to get the Babywise book. It is awesome. It is my baby bible. Both my boys are great sleepers, nappers and eaters. This book gives step by step instructions.

Good luck,

C.

C., I so feel your pain!! We went through this with our youngest daughter and it is tough. She woke up every hour, on the hour for the first 6 months of her life and napped very sporadically. She always had dark circles under her eyes and we worried about her health as well as ours – mentally & physically!! I truly thought I would lose my mind from complete lack of sleep. We tried everything, including many of the things you have tried - the Ferber method, etc. We spent a fortune ordering machines that our Pediatrician had to write a prescription for. One of them attached to the bottom of the crib and simulated the movement and sound of a moving car. I hate to admit this, but we even tried a medication that was supposed to help her fall asleep. This was in hopes of moving her in the direction of a sleeping schedule and allowing me to get a little bit of sleep so I could function. When she was about 8 months old, our Pediatrician referred us to a children’s sleep clinic at Children’s Hospital in Dallas and we signed up immediately. It took a while to get an appointment and by the time we were supposed to go in, she actually started to sleep a bit on her own so we cancelled. I know this probably isn’t the answer you were hoping for, but this too shall pass! Children’s is certainly worth checking into, but your Pediatrician does need to refer you. You will be in my prayers as I know how frustrating this is for you!! You want to be able to enjoy your adorable baby, but sometimes you just want to scream from exhaustion.

Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child- it was a life saver. My son was sleeping through the night at 13 weeks- a week after we started sleep training. He is now 14 months and still sleeps through the night-unless we do something to mess up his schedule (and I mean really mess it up- like no afternoon nap, etc...) He sleeps from about 7:30 pm until 6:30 am (and has for months).

Good luck!

I also wonder if your baby isn't a stomach sleeper- mine is- and he refused to go to sleep on his back until he got really sick at about 6 months and we were forced to make him sleep on his back. Now we put him down either way- and every morning he is on his stomach!

It sounds like you are trying everything. I know my nephew used to put my sister through this. The doc was saying that he had colic, but it turned out he wasn't getting enough to eat. She was breastfeeding and her milk supply had decreased without her realizing. Could it be some discomfort like that? (hunger, reflux, gas?)

My daughter used to have gas issues that would cause her to cry until I finally figured out the trigger foods and eliminated them.

For my daughter I used a modified BabyWise routine. During the day I focused on keeping the eating and play time regular, she took care of the sleeping well after that.

It sounds like you are working so hard on this, I hope you are able to find out what is making your little guy so unhappy. May you get your regular rest soon.

My 4.5 month old daughter likes static -- yes, static! Like if you turn off the cable and put the tv on some random channel and it has static -- my husband and I joke that it is her favorite music ;-) When she won't calm down to go to sleep we put on the static and turn it up loud. She totally calms down. Then I just turn it down once she starts to calm down. She won't take a paci so I started letting her hold one of those bunnies that has a blanket attached. Between sucking on the bunny and the static - she can soothe herself and go to sleep in about 10 minutes without any crying. Once she falls asleep I take the bunny away -- becuase I am paranoid about SIDS. Now that she has sort of learned how to go to sleep on her own we don't use the static as often - she can just drift off to sleep on her own some nights.

Hi C.,
I feel your pain. I have two who both truly thought sleep was something other people did...but certainly not them! Every time we seemed to get into some semblance of a routine, they either got a cold, we had to travel or something. At 5 months I would look at teething pain or growth spurt, but you just may not have a sleeper. I worked full time starting at 8 weeks and was chronically sleep deprived for their first year. Giving them solids was not helpful either. I don't really have any advice on what works, mine eventually grew out of it, but they were both about 1 year old before we saw consistent improvement. They both slept better at night with us in bed, but we didn't like that although resorted to it to get some rest. Know you are actually in the majority...most children don't sleep well at night (See drsears.com). Some things we did that eventually paid off were estabilishing a consistent bedtime routing at the same time every night, rocked to sleep and made sure they were good and asleep before we put them down, put a heating pad on their bed to warm the bed before we put them down so the cold would not wake them up when we put them down (but make sure it's not too hot and you turn it off and take it out of the crib before you put him down). We also kept the lights off and had very minimal stimulation when they got up at night. Finally, I had a chair that was comfortable to sleep in and spent many a night asleep in my chair with a child in my arms. I feel your pain and am sorry you are going through this...know you are not alone. If it's any solice, they do eventually grow out of it.
Good luck, A.

Does Mason sleep on his back or his stomach?
Many, many babies sleep much better on their stomachs. Maybe try him on his stomach (in spite of all the SIDS "scare tactics").

Sierra, a breastfeeding baby with food allergies, has been a stomach sleeper since 2.5 weeks old and sleeping 8+ hours through the night since 6 weeks old. Now she sleeps 10-11 hours at night as a 10 mo. baby. (We found out about her food allergies at 4 mo.)

Also, don't forget about the temperature of the room. Last night, Sierra woke up 2 times before midnight because her room was too hot. Once we dropped the temp, she went right back to sleep and didn't get up until 9.30 this morning.

Good luck!

hi C. -
i have a 4 month old that has slept through the night since she was 6 weeks old. all of a sudden last saturday she started getting super fussy around 9pm and wouldn't sleep and just screamed when we put her down. she did this for about 6 days and i took her to the dr. who gave us prescription for zantac - she thought she had acid reflux - we gave her the medicine that night and she has been back to normal since then! mine could be an isolated case but you never know! :)
good luck with your little one!

Hi C.,
Thank goodness my 3 are older now. My 2 boys never liked to sleep. We found with one of them it was his ears. Just enough fluid to bother him when he layed down. My second one, just liked to be held. AS long as we were holding him, he was sound asleep. At 10, he still likes to cuddle with Mom. My daughter is now 8 and from day 1, I could put her down and she was out. She will go to bed now, with out being told. I guess what I am getting at, make sure he is healthy, no reflux, ears or even a little sinus trouble. Then just love him. If you both sleep better sitting in a chair, do it. Good Luck.

Hi C.,

This is probably one of the touchiest subjects with Mom and baby. I guess all babies are different and have different patterns, so please accept this as just a suggestion from my experiences.

My 4 month old has been sleeping through the night since 2 months of age. Not sure if my techniques are the reason, or I just got lucky with a great sleeper.

One factor that helped him sleep was that I switched from breastfeeding to formula. Before the formula, he would wake up every two hours for feeding. I believe the formula sustains him longer, therefore he is able to sleep longer without getting hungry.

Secondly, I have him sleeping next to our bed in a co-sleeper. I have every intention of moving him to his crib, but at this moment I personally feel it's too soon. I know all of the books tell you that you need to get him in his crib before it's too late, but I know that he sleeps better knowing that I'm there next to him if he needs me.

I personally don't feel the saying is true that you can "spoil your baby". Contrarily, if you pick him up when he cries, sleep with him in the same room to make him feel safe, or meet his needs when he "communicates" with you, you are actually teaching him that he can trust you. If you walk out of the nursery as he cries himself to sleep, let him scream and not pick him up, he may not feel he can trust that you will comfort him when he needs it. Babies cry for a reason and it's up to us to try and figure out what they're telling us.

I commend you for getting him to sleep in his crib at 3 weeks, but that may have been a shock and lonely for him after being close to/inside you for 9 months. I feel alot of people are so quick to set schedules and go by the rule book, but sometimes what babies need are on such a basic/natural level that books aren't even needed for these times. Just remember, you don't get these precious moments back. You can't hit rewind, so if he sleeps in your room, or in the comfort of your arms while feeding, or bouncing, or swaddling, so be it. There will be a time when you can't swaddle him and sing him to sleep, so enjoy it now while you can. Before they get "embarassed" of their Mom and won't let you kiss or hug them in front of their friends :)