Desperate for Sleep!

Get the book Secrets of the Baby Whisperer - or visit website.. follow her instructions regarding sleep issues. I would recommend the book read from start to finish but you can get great ideas re: just sleep from it. she is the master! good luck

what time are you trying to put him to bed? Maybe it's too early?

My son is a GREAT sleeper, but he's almost never slept for 12 hours. At 8 weeks, he was sleeping "through the night", but what that really meant was 11:00 pm until about 6:00 am. That meant I got one good solid chunk of sleep. To get to that point and further, I did my darndest to keep him awake after his last evening nap. Slowly we started putting him to bed earlier and earlier (now, at 20 mos he's in bed between 7:30 and 8:00 most nights). he still wakes at 6:00 or 6:30 (see, only about 10 hours), but that works well, because I work and that's a good time to get the morning going and get him to daycare.

That book caused me so much heartache. That book makes you believe that all babies are capable of sleeping 12 hours straight from a very young age and never stop. I followed it and my son did great from 4 to 8 months old and then he never slept through the night again and is just starting to at 2 years and 7 months. My baby is 5 months old and still eats 2-3 times per night. You might just have to accept that you don't have a great sleeper on your hands. From talking to many many friends and family I realized that my son was more like the norm than the exception. Also, you really can't expect a baby that age that doesn't even grasp what a paci really is to try to look for one in the middle of the night no matter how many you put in there with him. I know that's not what you want to hear but he might just be like that until he is older. It's great that you got lucky with your first one. They always say you only get lucky with one child. I'm not saying you should stop working on trying to teach him to sooth himeslf, but you might get a lot more sleep if you just let him sleep with you when he wakes up at night and move him back to his crib after he has fallen asleep if you don't want him in your bed for the rest of the night. My son starts out the night in his crib and once he wakes up to nurse he just stays in my bed for the rest of the night. And by the way, how are you so certain that he isn't hungry?

I had the same problem. There is a small machine at Walmart (it is blue with a yellow star on the front and can be found in the baby isle with the toys
0 It plays sounds and music. It also comes with three different interchangeable discs that creat a colorfull light show on the ceiling. It is very soothing to the baby Even though my son still cries himself to sleep he is laying down watching the light show and listening to music. 15 min later he is out. it is a lifesafer for me

We had alot of sleep issues with my now 21 months old, when he was younger, and here are some of my "findings".
We had him sleep with a white noise, type of sound since he was born - the sounds of the waves. Now he sleeps wih t it, and he will request us to play it again if ever he has woken up or not fallen asleep and the sounds stop.
At 3 months, I also introduced a blankie - it has a head and knots instead of hands, and my sons still sucks on it. It is easier for him to keep in his hands. I am not sure if it would work for your son, but you could try it.
You did not mention if you started solids. Before that age, (5 months) I deceided to start cereals, because I had the impression he was waking up humgry. This could be why it is so hard for him to go back to sleep.
And to conclude, the doc told me whatever you want to chage will take 4 nights in genenral. So it means that if you don't want to wlak around the house because it is too exhausting, you don't but try to shoot him in his room, for the times it akes, than the next day it will take less time and in the end he will understand it is not going to happen outside. The few days that are difficult are only a short period, if you consider that if this works, then in the lng run you will be able to sleep better.
There are a few books you should read, but I don't remember the titles. I am back from travelling on Thursday, so if you email me back then I will find the titles for you.

Good luck!

Isa

Hi,
I would suggest you take your child to the Dr to rule out any serious conditions that could be causeing this; acid reflux is not unheard of in a young one. Once you have ruled out all causes like that, you may just have to endure for a while and keep on trying various suggestions that could bring him comfort at night. Either way, remember that it wont always be that way.
my 2nd child had colic and i didn't know a thing about that, so endured it with her (as you are doing) and when I found out that her symtoms were described as colic, i was so upset with myself for not looking into it sooner. Above all, find out if there is any problem like that--the clue here is that the child quiets when you pick them up...Take care! A

I know this goes against all medical advice but, Have you tried having him sleep on his stomach? Both of my sons (Now 2 and 5) began sleeping better on their stomachs at around 4 months. They liked the constant pressure on their stomachs(like being cradled) and when they lost their binky it was easier for them to manuver back into their own mouths.

I also agree with some of the other posts that he might still be hungry. My middle child(now 2) had a single 2am feeding till he was 11 months old, then simply began through sleeping with out it. It was easier to give him a 10min bottle/nursing and go back to sleep then fight for hours to get sleep with out it. They sleep through on their own time.

Good Luck
C. G

Try, try, and try again. The baby whisperer confused me. My guy had colic but that eased at 4 mos. I know your pain! Does he sleep for naps? Use that same mini-routine (rock, music, whatever)for nights. Does he calm in a swing at night? Does he calm after feeding or diaper change? Is it just he's mad at not finding a binky? Maybe change from a binky to something bigger he can find - blankie, teething rings, towel...? (my guy never took a paci).
I used Dr. Weisbluth (Healthy sleep habits..) and that worked for us once the colic eased. I think at that age they may feel the separation too and just want company. I could never sleep w/baby in my room so could NOT co sleep.
What finally worked for me was anticipating his wake up (set your alarm) and WAKE HIM UP EARLY for a little water in a bottle (he wasn't hungry at that point, just wanting company. He didn't like that and started sleeping thru. Oh, and the other thing we did (on a long weekend) was send hubby in to check basic needs - not me. If he was just crying for my company, he wasn't getting it in the middle of the night. By the way, this was when I was sure he wasn't hungry, or sick. Only then do you tackle sleep issues. Keep investigating what he's trying to tell you and take a nap when he naps for a while to recharge. Take care of yourself. (I couldn't think my way out of a paper bag til about 9 mos. for sleep deprivation). You'll get thru it.!!

I co sleep and get enough sleep. If he wakes I 'm right there and he goesback to sleep. If he nursues, its relaxing for me, I don't get alert. Its not for every one. Concidered it?

Hi M.,

I went through a simiilar situation with my 2.5 yo. After 1 yr of great sleeping, she stopped sleeping during the night. After 1.5 yrs of pure torture, I changed drs and found out that my child has asthma and one of the symptoms was nighttime restlessness. Since her diagnosis and treatment, we're both sleeping like babies.

ok this is just advice take it or leave it.

every one is probably going to scream at me for this.

but here goes.

put your baby to sleep on his stomach.

by 6 mo he should be able to pick up his head. just make sure that your bed sheets are tight fitting and that there is nothing else in the crib.

my daughter sleeps on her stomach other wise she wakes up every 10 - 15 mins.

just a suggestion. if you are not cumfortable with this try it for nap times and then progress on to night time sleeping. just try it who knows it might actually work and usually the paccifire will stay in the mouth or very near by.

my son is the same way and he is 7 months old i have a pretty good routine down now at about 8 pm i rock him to sleep with no pacifier then i put him in his crib pop a pacifier in his mouth then i stay up till about 1 am then move him out of his crib to his play pen in the living room and i pass out in the living room since my fiancee's alarm wakes me up i find this easier and my baby sleep till about 9 am i have no idea why this works for him but it does maybe he gets reassured since i pick up and he kind of wakes up and knows i am there also he prefers to sleep on his tummy too i put him on his back and he immediately flips to his belly i told his doc and she said it is fine as long as i put him down on his back because babies tend to move around in there sleep any way

My daughter always slept on her stomach just the way M. described. On her back she wouldnt sleep at all. Be patient in your "figuring it out". CIO didnt work for me either; you are doing great actually ; they do need to be calmed down to sleep and stay asleep contentedly.

I hear you...we have a 7mth old with our 3 yr old. If your baby is not too big...would you be open to using the swing? Our doctor said we can still use it to soothe our baby. Our toddler, as an infant, was an amazing sleeper. Our second, needs a whole lot more soothing. We do rock her, with a cuddly clothe and a little bit of a bottle that she more than anything, gnaws on. That mini routine puts her out in less than 10 minutes.

We also, for our first who did a pacifier, created like a little open cocoon in his bed. We rolled up beach towels and formed an oval around where he would sleep, the pacifiers would stay more in that nook and he could find them easily. This is all very hard and obviously different for each baby. I know the swaddle did not work but we also found that just swaddling the arms with a bigger blanket (very large ones at BRUS or Nordstroms). Good luck

I had a situation where my son would wake up every night to nurse. Finally, a doctor suggested a plan of action that really worked. Hope it works for you. When your child wakes up he is used to you coming to comfort him and he needs to learn to comfort himself (with your help). When he wakes up let him cry for 10 minutes, then go into him and comfort WITHOUT picking him up (pat his back, rub his head...). Then leave the room and let him cry. If he is still crying after 10 minutes go back and comfort the same way (WITHOUT picking up). Repeat the process each time allowing a bit more time between going to comfort him. Go 15 minutes then 20 then 30.... The next night repeat the process with time consistency. Begin to stretch out the time between crying and responding each night. It took about 4 days of this (I have a VERY strong willed child). He finally got used to the fact that I would always be there for him and at the same time allowed him to learn how to comfort himself by you NOT picking him up. You are basically helping him feel secure that you will always be there for him. It was hard not snuggle my son at first; but I knew that he knew I was right there and it changed our lives when he finally was able to sleep. Good luck

Hi M.,
Our daughter is almost one year and most of the time will sleep from 9:30 pm til 6:30-7 am. If she does wake up, around 2 or 3 we feed her a bottle while rocking her (always with a bright night light on to help keep her eyes closed) and playing her crib music, burp her and lay her down with her favorire blankie.
Our sons favvorite is a binky and sorry to say at four years old still falls asleep with it. But we don't care, it works, makes him happy and his teeth are fine. Our trick for him and us finding his binky is we tie bandanas (Walmart for a dollar, all colors) to them, sometimes one binky on each end, and a couple bandanas floating through the house. It really works and they can find them in their crib or bed and it doesn't fall through the crib rails.
Keep in mind, your baby could be hungry (growth spurt) , teething or not feeling well. If you let them cry themselves to sleep do it in 5, 7, 10, 15 increments, going in after 5 and saying it's okay and time to go to sleep now and walk out, then go back in at 7 min. But every baby is different first make sure all of the babies need are met, diaper, food, burp and favorite thing and that the room is warm enough. Good luck on getting some sleep. L. Z.

Hey M.,

Here is my unpopular, but personal advice... I nursed two boys until they were 2 1/2 each. Until they were a year and a half, I slept with them in a double bed. Not my bed, but theirs. I nursed them when they woke up and slept when they slept. We rarely had sleepless nights. Both of my kids sleep through the night now. They are 4 and 7. They sleep in their own bed. When we stopped nursing, it was a painless and easy transition. both kids potty trained early. I don't know how much of it is them or me or both, but in my opinion, babies cry for a reason. They are not manipulative or needy on purpose. They are honest and sincere about their needs. Having my children in bed with me and nursing on demand made sleeping and waking very easy.

I know it is not popular, but it worked for us.

I hope you the best and good luck. Sleep deprivation stinks!

Best,

M.