Four-month-old Not Sleeping

Updated on May 25, 2008
C.W. asks from Cedar Rapids, IA
26 answers

My daughter is 4.5 months old. She has been a good sleeper since birth, most recently sleeping from 8 p.m. to between 3 and 4 a.m., eating then sleeping again until 6 a.m. She started out sleeping in our bed, then the bassinet but has been in her crib in her room for two months. For the last five nights however she has refused to sleep in her crib. She can be sound asleep but will wake up the instant I lay her down. She's also incredibly resltess, her head, legs and arms twitching but her eyes closed. The only way I've been able to get her to sleep is with me. Even then she's restless and still wakes up to eat every 3 hours instead of only once a night.

We had switched from Enfamil Gentlease back to regular Enfamil and I thought that might be the problem so we went back, but last night was the same story. At first I also thought that the problem was that she was off her schedule. We were out of town THursday night and she didn't get to sleep at her normal time (she typically is a very routine baby -- by her choice) Friday she was up later than normal too and Saturday we again were on the road a great bit of the day.

I know it's only been a few days, but because I don't know what caused the change I'm worried that won't be able to get back to our old routined. Could it be the formula change or the lat nights?? Should we start cereal? The pediatrician gave us the ok and I've been told that helps babies sleep better.

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So What Happened?

Thanks all for your helpful responses. I don't know if it was the extra formula and bath before bed, rice cereal or heartbeat bear in the crib did it but our last two nights have been nearly back to normal. As I was finger feeding her some cereal last night I also felt a little tooth poking through her bottom gum. So those of you that speculated that she was teething were apparently spot on. Thanks again for humoring this first time mom!

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S.O.

answers from Milwaukee on

Hello, ms.C. w.

I was also a first time mom who went thru the same exact thing with my little girl at that age,who is now 3.5 years old. She may be going thru the changes that babys tend to experience around their 5 and 6 months.so try the cereal(oatmeal)in her bottles and if that do not work try mashed potatoes. I know it sound weird but it actually works.

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H.B.

answers from Milwaukee on

It's possible she could have an ear infection. They tend to get worse when babies lie down. Some babies don't pull on their ears or show any other signs.

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C.K.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi C.,

My son is the same age as your daughter. We went through this a few weeks ago. It could be many things: teething, needing cereal, growth spurt, etc.

The best advice I ever read is to put the baby to bed after they are relaxed, but BEFORE they are asleep. Yes, they often wake up once they hit the mattress, or they wake up shortly thereafter and have no idea where they are. ("I fell asleep in mom's arms, and now I'm in the crib? What the heck?")

My son's issue was he was waking up to eat, so we started giving him cereal. We don't put it in his bottle, although you certainly can. We feed it to him with a spoon. He has slept through the night ever since.

Another trick we employ is that we still swaddle our son. We actually have a cloth swaddler with velcro, and we wrap him up tight in that, and he just zonks right out. The brand of swaddler we have is "Kiddopotamus".

There are strong opinions out there about letting a baby cry it out. I'm sure you have your own, but since our kids are the same age, I'll share mine. I've given my son a 10 minute crying threshhold. What that means is if he starts crying when I put him down, I let him cry for 10 minutes. I use that time to take out the trash or tidy up the kitchen. After 10 minutes, I go by his door and evaluate the crying:

Much of the time, he falls asleep within that 10 minute time period.
Other times, he is just whimpering or his crying has slowed down. If that's the case, I give him another 10 minutes.
Rarely, he is still screaming his head off. Then I do go in and soothe. I don't pick him up, but I talk to him and reswaddle him if necessary, and give him his pacifier.

Another tip is that a well-rested baby sleeps well. So, make sure your daughter is getting her naps in. We've had to reevaluate and reschedule our son's naps as he grows, so don't be afraid to do that. (Right now, he sleeps for about 30-45 minutes in the morning, then a long 2-3 hour nap in the later afternoon, and then another short nap just an hour or two before bed.) Every baby is different.

Good luck!

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R.K.

answers from Minneapolis on

She may have begun teething. I think it can start as early as 4.5 months.

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T.W.

answers from Wausau on

I'm a mother of four ranging from 16 to 5 years of age. Sometimes simple things like going to bed at a different time can make it a little harder to get back into the routine of things. I also noticed with every single one of my children that after they were only a few months old it was harder for them to stay alseep when I layed them down. I really think it was because they sensed the leaving me and would wake up. I cured this by having my husband or someone else take them from my lap and lay them down, this worked very well. I wish you luck!

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J.F.

answers from Minneapolis on

C.,

Our daughter is now 6 months old and went through something similar. She has done a roller coaster on how much she sleeps and how often she wakes. Just when I think we have the pattern, she mixes it up. We went to the pediatrician today for her 6 month check-up. She reminded me that even babies that "sleep through the night" wake up a few times to several times without us knowing it and that babies do not sleep like us. They are very mobile and loud. Our daughter throws her feet into the air while she sleeps! I also remember reading that when babies are going through a change (rolling over, teething, crawling, etc.) they try practicing in their sleep. Our pediatrician also suggests putting the baby to bed while awake. This has worked VERY well for us. We have established a routine that she is now very comfortable with. We bathe her, feed her, burp her, lie her in her bed, put a pacifier in, hand her a small stuffed animal rattle, and tell her we love her and will see her in a few hours. We usually never hear a peep from her. On days that our schedule is off we do what we can to keep the routine the same if we can.

Good luck and enjoy every minute with her!
J.

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M.B.

answers from Milwaukee on

You should try bathing her before bedtime and keeping her up a little longer. The bath will relax her and put her right to sleep since she stayed up a little longer. Or try to put a little cereal in her bottle before bed if your not already doing so.:) good luck!

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A.R.

answers from Minneapolis on

It says a lot about you C. that you are considering the formula as the possible problem. Look at the label: formula has corn syrup and corn syrup solids or some other form of highly processed sugar. Most formula's contain all kinds of things you would never eat yourself including GMO/antibiotic-laden milk, fillers, and unnecessary doses of vitamins.

There is an alternative! All of the natural food stores and co-ops sell all-natural infant formulas. They contain no dyes, processed sugars or fillers. If you don't have a natural food store near you, order your formula on-line. There are several "safe baby" web sites to choose from that carry safe formula, bottles, nipples, pacifiers, etc.

Also, never heat milk in a plastic bottle in the microwave. This will leach toxic plastics into the milk and cause even more reactions in your baby. Sleeplessness could easily be the result of this as well. Heat any formula in glass rather than plastic.

Once you have gotten her to a food source that is safe and healthy, she will most likely sleep again.

One more sleep aide; swaddle her in a receiving blanket good and tight and put a soft cotton cap on her head. Swaddled and warm, she will sleep more soundly regardless of where she is.

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L.M.

answers from Minneapolis on

We have always put our kids down before they fall asleep. I nursed mine, but it doesn't matter if it is the bottle either. What we did was to feed our babies cereal mixed with breast milk or formula(very runny at first and then thicker as they got better at eating and swollowing), bathe them, nighttime lotion massage, pj's, breast fed, lay them down the instant they stopped nursing. They always jerked fully awake, but calmed down very quickly and went to sleep on their own. We never used pacifiers because they would lose them and then be upset. I did not want to have to keep going in and putting the pacifier back in. They always had the same blanket, even if we had to quick wash it and get it back out of the dryer in time for bed. I think 4 1/2 is fine for cereal. I could not wait until 6 months! They would be starving all the time. Especially since breast milk is not as filling as formula and they need to eat more often. Be sure that the afternoon nap is not too long so that bedtime and nighttime sleeping go much more smoothly. Oh, and at 4 1/2 months your daughter will just kick her way out of a recieving blanket anyway so I would skip trying that myself and just put her down as she is starting to slip off at first, and then move your way up to just putting her down fully awake. It wont take her long to learn how to fall asleep on her own, and then you can have some time to unwind yourself:) Good luck!

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T.F.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi C., our third is almost 5 months and as I was slowly switching her from breast milk to formula over the last 3 weeks we ran into the same problem with the gentlease and regular lipil. Once we switched her to the gentlease it took about 3 days for her to kick the middle of night fussyness. So wait it out a little longer. I would also recomend starting cereal because it takes a couple of weeks to even be beneficial to them because they are not quite sure what to do with it! Hope that helps good luck, I know it isn't anyfun to have a sleeper that starts to revert after being such a good sleeper:)

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A.C.

answers from Des Moines on

Another possible culprit could just be a growth spurt. These can mess up an otherwise good sleeping routine as your baby is hungry more often.

Grace and peace be with you!

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C.D.

answers from La Crosse on

Sounds to me like she's probably teething. If so, she needs you close for reassurance because teething is uncomfortable and scary for infants. I say don't make her sleep in the crib, just let her cosleep with you. She just needs you nearby so she can feel secure. This helps babies deal with pain and discomfort. After all, she spent all that time in the womb feeling good--pain is a new thing and she doesn't have the benefit of you always there all around her.

Keep in mind too that babies may be good sleepers for a period of time but they often change their habits. That she was a "good sleeper" at one point does not mean she always will be, so you have to adjust your expectations accordingly. Sleepwise it is impossible to hold a baby to a standard because they are always changing their own schedule just as you think you finally have them in a "routine". This is totally normal, I think, and I also think it is a sign that a baby is growing.

From what you told us about your baby, it also sounds like she is waking up to eat more because her stomach is bigger than it used to be because she is bigger than she used to be. Babies are the only ones who can tell us how much they need to eat--they don't have the overeating instinct that adults addicted to food and other stuff have trained themselves to develop. Then again I'm not a doctor so read about it other places because I'm sure there's people out there a lot smarter than myself on that subject. My point is, she wakes up every three hours to eat because 1. she is hungrier than she was before and 2. she is probably teething and doesn't have any other way of coping with the pain, so she wants to eat because it brings her all sorts of relief.

As far as the cereal goes, I think you could probably do some rice cereal and after a few weeks, start stirring in a little baby food vegetable like peas or squash...and then move onto fruit. If she can't sit up yet then you really need to wait. Good luck!

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K.L.

answers from Milwaukee on

Hi C.-Try putting a shirt that you have slept in for a few days in her crib with her. I used to cover my daughter with my shirt-your smell will comfort her.
Good luck!
K.

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A.M.

answers from Janesville-Beloit on

She could be getting some teeth which will interrupt sleep. Also, as babies get older more things tend to wake them up and they have to learn to put themselves back to sleep. My advice would be to put her down when she is drowsy but awake so she can learn to put herself to sleep. She may cry a little at first but try to stick it out. Also just keep sticking to your normal schedule, she will get back on track. I know a day can seem like forever when you are sleep deprived but hang in there!!!
Good luck

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C.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

The hard part is that just when you think you have figured things out they decide to change it up. It is frustrating, but happens frequently. They are just growing and changing so fast. When that happened at our house we had to create a new normal. We just used trial and error to see what would work the best. Both of my children were like that and neither one acted the same.

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R.M.

answers from Madison on

Hi C.,
The exact thing happened to us. Our daughter all of a sudden refused to be put down (her eyes would fly open the second we tried to put her in her crib) to go to sleep and was up every two hours. (she is breastfed) We eventually had to cry it out because it didn't get better. We blamed the vaccines and teething but I also think this tends to happen at around 4 1/2 months. Now our daughter is 6 1/2 months and sleeping pretty well. The Ferber approach isn't fun but it seems to work. Good luck!
-R.

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T.C.

answers from Minneapolis on

She may have an ear infection. My son is usually always a good sleeper to, but becomes very restless when he has an ear infection (which isnt much). He is 9 months old and only had 2 so far, but he shows no other symptoms at all other than restless sleeping. Or she may be teething or going through a growth spurt. If it's not her ears, Im sure it will pass soon. Good Luck.

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M.P.

answers from Sheboygan on

My daughter is also 4 months old and has been sleeping in her crib since birth. She has been sleeping through the night probably since she was 2 months old. We had started breastfeeding her for the first three months and then switched to Enfamil with Iron. We had received a free Enfamil Gentlease and tried that. It seemed to mess with her schedule a bit, not sure if that formula is as filling or what, but we switched back and she was fine (8:30 p.m. to 6:00 a.m. religously). When we come to a weekend, though, her schedule is all messed up due to all the running around and no soild naps. So the Monday/Tuesday after are always unknown. Some times we are up at 1:30 sometimes 3 a.m. I would not worry about this. It always seemed to go back to normal once she was back in her routine. The most important thing we realized is that, no matter what, she goes down at the same time each night 8:30 and we make sure she eats a bit before she goes down, even if she only ate 2 hours before. Once we started making sure we kept the exact routine after a rough weekend, then she was fine. Hope this helps.

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E.S.

answers from Madison on

Hi C., there's probably no one cause and no one solution, but I just wanted to let you know that waking as soon as you put her in the crib is very normal for that age. At our child care center, it seems like every single infant will go through that stage, usually for a few weeks, before being able to stay asleep during the transfer to the crib. While it's most severe, we sometimes help the baby fall asleep on a soft mat on the floor, so as not to have to make the transfer. If baby really can't fall asleep on her own, we just have one of the teachers hold the baby the entire time she or he is sleeping, so as to get in at least one good nap that day. Of course, you don't want to have to hold your baby all night! I just wanted you to know how very normal this problem is, and that they do all grow out of it, with a little encouragement. One thing to consider about the frequent waking is that many babies are starting a growth spurt and are hungry -- you might want to give the cereal a try; some babies seem to do well with that. Good luck! E., Middleton Baby and Child Care

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S.K.

answers from Minneapolis on

C.,

I went through this with my first baby, but it was because I started letting her fall asleep in the swing or in the car in the daytime and she lost the ability to put herself to sleep. (Everytime someone finishes a sleep cycle, they need to know how to go back into the next one.)

I had to be really diligent about her naptime - not leaving the house during that time and not letting her fall asleep in the swing - and eventually she relearned how to do it. At 4 months she is old enough to go at least 12 hour stretches at night without waking up.

Good luck,
S.

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J.N.

answers from Duluth on

I think your darling is a bit young for cereal. 6 months is best. It is an old wive's tale that babies sleep better with cereal. If her tummy isn't ready to process the new food, you may have a whole new host of problems. Sounds like a growth spurt, and she simply needs more formula. Also, it is working for her to fuss, then she gets mommy and daddy's bed. Babies are smart, and cunning little cuties. It is painful, but letting her cry it out, while using a soothing voice that you are close by, will let her know you mean business, and that you still love her. Growing pains are hard for Moms, too. Soon she will learn that the old game of fuss = getting to sleep in the family bed, isn't working any more.... J., also an R.N.

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J.Z.

answers from Minneapolis on

My son just turned 5 months old. He was sleeping very well for two weeks starting at 4 months, and we were so excited to be getting solid sleep again. Then all of a sudden he started getting up at night. He did that for about two weeks and now he is back to sleeping all night long again. I think it may be a growth spurt or the start of teething. We haven't started cereal yet. It's hopefully just a phase for your daughter, too!

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E.J.

answers from Omaha on

You may want to take your daughter in to see the MD. My son went through this about a month ago- 13months and I passed it off as teething but after about a week of no sleep I took him in and it was an ear infection just a thought hope you get some sleep and hope this helps.

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A.P.

answers from Rochester on

Offen there is a sleep regression about 4-5 months due to physical/emotional milstones of infants. At this age they're learning so much that it disrupts sleep for 2-4 weeks. It passes and you'll have your regular baby back plus she'll be more expressive and interactive.

Hang in there Momma

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E.I.

answers from Duluth on

you shouldnt really change formulas often. it does cause some discomfort. different formulas can cause different symptoms in babies. ask your doctor which brand he recommends, but beware cuz hospitols are paid by formula companies to support their product.. so make sure its working for your baby.

however, your daughter is 4 months old and she is probably teething. this sounds like classic teething behavior. its aweful! especially the first few, they are incredibly hard to care for. if you have a sling, carry her in that during the day. the best one i have found (and ive used 3!) is the moby wrap. it can be up to 50$ for one with shipping, but a kid i had in day care would NOT stop crying until i put him in the moby!! then the difference was night and day! he was finally content! and he finally slept!

motherhood is exhausting, and theres no reason for us to think otherwise... sleeping in your bed may be inconvenient, but if you can do it for a while, it will be the best thing you ever do. my son is 18 months and he sleeps with us part of the time, but we do have his crib in our room with us and he will spend most of the night in it. i never let him cry it out and he now will lay down in his crib and go to sleep on his own with hardly a wimper! i think not crying it out helps them develop a good attitude about sleep and the crib, its not scary, its not lonely, its not a punishment. we may think our kids understand that we are still there and when we go back and check on them and stuff, but really we are saying that their being upset isnt important enough to hold and comfort them. i know you didnt ask this question, but it kinda goes with the territory.

anyway, so just be sensitive to your daughters needs and moods. there will be some nights where she will sleep through the night without a wimper, and other nights where she will be up every hour! we just need to remain connected enough to respond when our children need us to and know when we can step back a little. its 2 steps forward and 1 step back, and when they take that 1 step back we need to let them lean on us! they dont have to "be a big kid" if all they want is to be a baby for a little bit. that goes for their whole lives too!

AS FOR starting cereal, i wouldnt. thats probably not the problem. it wont help her sleep longer, her stomach is only so big so that wont make any difference. it actually can cause more problems if you start too soon. go to www.askdrsears.com and search for topics on starting solids. he has some EXCELLENT advice! there are specific signs to watch for when looking to feed solids, and that site will help you be able to identify them!

you are doing a great thing being so sensitive to your daughters troubles!! keep it up mom! and just remember that being connected is more important than training her to do anything shes not ready to do!

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J.W.

answers from Minneapolis on

Both of my kids got teeth at four monthes. (front two bottom) That always interrupted their sleep. If she's drooling and chewing more you might be able to tell. also if you see two little white spots below the gums.

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