My 2 1/2 year old daughter is not eating dinner!!! She eats well during the day, and doesn't put up much or any fuss. But at dinner time, she just won't eat. She sits at the table and goofs around for a while, despite our rebukes, threats, and punishments. We've tried sending her to the corner, spanking, sending her to her room, letting her get down, positive reinforcemnt when she does eat something, but nothing has worked! And it's not that she doesn't like the food, she does this even with foods we KNOW she likes, chicken nuggets, pizza, etc. We don't let her snack or drink to much before dinner. I just don't know what to do anymore. It's exhausting! I know she gets enough nutrition, so I'm not really worried about that factor, it's just a battle of wills, she's stubborn and just doesn't want to do what she doesn't want to do!
And, I'm no stranger to picky eaters. My 12 year old son was picky too, but not to this extent. And my other 2 1/2 year old is a little picky. I myself was a picky eater. My parents used to make me sit at the table until I ate, or until it was time for bed. They didn't allow me a nighttime snack, but I got to the point that I didn't ask for one. I would rather not eat dinner than get a snack or get up to play. But, that wasn't unitl I was a little older than her. And I'm not entirely sure that method was really effective. I still didn't eat my dinner, so I don't think it really worked. My mother-in-law says I should make her stay at the table until she eats. But like I said, my parents did that and I don't think it worked, I still got my way....I didn't eat my dinner. What do you think? Any suggestions. Like I said I don't think this is about nutrition as much as it is her strong will.
Don't argue with her. If she's eating well the rest of the day, don't sweat it. My 2 1/2 year old is only picky at dinner. Arguing with her makes it worse. I offer a balanced diet throughout the day and if she doesn't eat dinner, I give her a vitamin.
I have a similar problem with my very stubborn and picky 3-year-old (she won't eat any meat at all!!) and my pediatrician assured me that as long as she is getting enough food and good nutrition in general, then there's no reason to try to force her to eat when she's not hungry. I was raised as part of the "clean plate club" where you always eat everything put before you whether you were hungry or not, and can remember a few nights having to sit at the table until 10pm in protest. But considering current problems with obesity I don't want to teach my kids to ignore their bodies and eat when they're not hungry. Probably the more important issue is whether she can sit at the table politely while the rest of the family eats - which at 2 1/2 she probably can't quite yet - but would be a better goal to aim for than eating when she's not hungry.
I have the same problem. I did not want her to eat all of her food, just some of it. Then, a few hours later, she'd be hungry and I didn't know what to do, feed her, don't feed her since she wouldn't eat with the rest of us? MY pediatrician suggested not to make her eat when she is not hungry, save her plate and put it in the frig until she says she's hungry(if that happens later in the evening), if the family is all together at dinner time have her stay at the table, but she doesn't have to eat. He said his son did the same thing for a while, but when he got up the next morning he had a really good breakfast.
good luck
A.,
Don't sweat the small stuff. Pick your battles. My 3 yr. old still does not eat. She is extremely picky and eats very little. She eats enough to keep her full of energy and healthy. Kids will eat when they are hungry. I don't belive in making children eat. My husband was made to eat and he feels like it only cause problems in the future. So what if she doesn't eat at night. If she is eating during the day, which is better than my daughter, she is probally getting enough. I have noticed that for months she didn't eat nothing. And I mean hardly nothing. She stays with my Aunt several days a week and even my Aunt was concerned, but she has picked up eating just a little here recently. She is also trying some new foods. She is a little over 3. Enjoy your daughter, it is not worth the fight everyday over food.
A.,
I agree with the other postings here, but have an additional tidbit.....
Toddlers have very little control in their lives. Their entire world is managed by parents/caregivers/etc. The only thing that toddlers do have control over is what goes in, potty issues, and sleeping habits.
Have you tried giving your daughter a sense of independance by offering her simple choices? It is possible that she has chosen to take control of dinnertime as a means to assert herself.
My suggestion, along with the wonderful advise you have already received, is to give her more options in other areas: ex. what she wears (Would you like to wear the brown sandals or your tennis shoes today?), when she goes for nap (Honey, would you like to take your nap now, or in 15 minutes?). This may seem small, but it gives her a voice. That may be all she is looking for. I think it is worth a try for a few weeks to see if you notice any improvement.
Thanks for listening.
I had the same Problem when my daughter was this age. I just told her that she didnt have to eat if she didnt want to but when she got hungry her dinner would be what she would be eating. After a few times of this she got to where she would eat with us. I dont think spanking for not eating is efficient or justified. Kids WILL eat when they are hungry, so if she is refusing maybe she isnt hungry when you guys are trying to feed her. Maybe try pushing afternoon snacks earlier (further away from dinner time) would help her be hungrier when dinner time arrives. If she is forced to eat when she isnt hungry she will not learn her body telling her shes hungry or isnt hungry. She should not be made to eat. Ive never made my daughter eat at dinner but when she gets done playing or whatever, dinner is waiting for her when she gets done. This only takes a few nights in a row for this to stop. And like I said I dont give her any snacks right before (about an hour or so)or alot of milk because then she wont eat her dinner either, even if it is something she likes. Hope this helps.
My daughter just turned 4 years old. And what I've discovered is that all kids have their own eating pattern. Perhaps your daughter is simply full by the end of the day. If she is eating during the day, but not at night, I wouldn't worry about it. My daughter is the exact opposite...she won't touch food until about 1:00 p.m. or 2:oo p.m. But the rest of the day, she eats just fine and isn't picky about food at all. So we let her not eat in the morning, even though we eat breakfast and lunch. She's etremely healthy and fit, getting plenty of exercise and fun play, and she's a very happy child.
Please don't punish your child for not eating at this age. I'm not experienced with older children, but I can say that her skipping a meal isn't so bad, and she'll still stay healthy and fine for it.
If she's getting enough nutrition otherwise, what's the big deal? If it's a control issue, then take away the fight. If you don't care either way, then she won't either. I'm a believer in kids will eat when they are hungry and not to force it. You know from your own experience that you can't force someone to eat if they are not hungry or don't want to. You want your children to learn to follow their own body cues for hunger and not make them learn to eat just because there is food in front of them.
That said, at my house, if you don't eat at meal time, you aren't going to get any snacks either. That's because I will not be expected to be a short order cook that is available 24/7.
A.,
In this battle of wills, ask yourself why is it a battle? She is getting plenty of nutrition as you said. Instead of making food a control issue, which can affect the way she looks at food forever, try easing off a bit. I know that you want her to be an obedient child, and there is alot to be said about letting your toddler know who's boss. The last thing you want is to give in and have her think she can control you. But there is a balance here. My mother always said you can control what goes into your child's mouth, but not how much. The whole sitting at the table till your dinner is done only, in my opinion, makes a stubborn child more stubborn, and a parent crazy.
Let her know if she doesn't want to eat at dinner time fine, but she won't get anything until the next family meal, and stick to it. You can also try sending her to bed early, but not because she is "bad", try not to give negative associations with food. Once again let me stress that this can do damage down the road. You want her to have a positive attitude about it and think that she does have some say in how she feeds herself.
Hope this helps, good luck to you.
-K.
chances are she is snacking to much throughout the day then when you sit down for dinner shes already full i had that same problem with my now 4 yr old and i just wouldnt let him snack 2 to 3 hours before we sat down to eat . however you must remember their bellys are small and it doesnt take much to fill them up, also chances are that as my son was they get stuck eating things that they know and i always cheated and would cook other things he didnt want to eat in with the rest of the food so he never even knew it was there also if you are worried just make sure to give a scooby doo a day and let her eat whats shes happy eating chances are around age 4 she will have a bigger and better selection of foods that she likes and she will be willing to try other foods
