My daughter is turning 4 on the 24th, and I want to make it so special, because with my health, I don't know how many more b-days I will be around for. So, I want to create lasting memories. I have so many questions and/or worries. Should I just do a girlie makeover thing with her and her sister and cousin, who are all really close. Or should I make it a bigger party and invite people with kids, whom she doesn't really know. Ugh! My mind is just going nuts, trying to get the what if's answered.
I can't express the gratitude I have to the over-welming number of responses to my plea for Birthday help. This was my first time to post on mamasource, and I am amazed at the number of women who so quickly offered not only advice, but words of comfort and understanding. From the bottom of my heart, THANKYOU!
So, I do believe I've decided what to do. Because of being tight on funds, and not being able to physically do too much, especially outside... Ok, I'll have a brand new outfit laid out for her when she wakes up, (she loves "spinning dresses"), I'll pin her b-day girl ribbon on her and head out for a mommy and me haircut/style, then to take her to get her ears pierced (unless she changes her miind again), then daddy will meet up with us for breakfast/lunch at IHOP, where her favorite uncle works and loves to show her off to his co-workers. (Us eating out is a rarity...Maybe once every 6 months, so I know she'll love this). Then her grandma will take over and take her to have a mani/pedi and possibly a movie (depending on how much time I need to get setup). While she is with grandma, I will head home to decorate and turn my house into "strawberry shortcake land", and daddy will take her lil sister and bestfriend cousin with him to pick up a couple other family members, that don't drive. If everything works as planned, everyone will be here and situated for when my angel walks in the door, and hopefully be surprised by the whole party and people and everything. She HAS to have a pinata, so I have that for the 3 kids to do, while the grownps watch. We're gonna play pin the stem on the strawberry and whatever else I can come up with to keep it fun and memorable for the 3 kids and the adult family. Because of my health/physical issues, I hate to be in pictures... but I'm reminded that this is how they know mommy... and my lil girls love to even tell me (out of the blue) that I'm perfect. Our video camera got stolen about 4 weeks ago, so no video... but I promise to do photos!! If anyone has decorating ideas or sumpthing strawberry to add to the day... I would love your ideas. Thank you again!!! God Bless!
A.,
Where do you live? I would love to help you decorate and what not. I love planning kids' birthday parties, and I'd love to help you. Please, call me, if you'd like to take me up on my offer: ###-###-####. I will not be charging you for anything...just want to help.
- S.
Do a girlie makeover and a an intimate proper tea party with just the sisters and cousins. Then you'll get the quality time and she'll feel grown-up and fancy. Inessa Stewart's in Dallas has great a tea room and there are several in downtown McKinney.
good luck!
A., I am sorry to hear that you think you won't be around for many birthday's to come. Truly breaks my heart. Bouncin' Around in Forney offers a spa, dress up/tea party. They have an awesome tea party room. Please feel free to check them out. www.bouncinaround.org or call ###-###-####
Tereas and Jaime are awesome and I promise you if you tell them your situation they will make this the best party ever. They can really turn parties into memories! AWESOME!!
Then have been family friends for sometime now, I would be more then happy to turn your information over to them. They make picutre boxes, can help with everything!
My prayers are with you and your family!!
I personally would do a girlie makeover thing with her and her sister and cousin, since that's who she is really close with. I am sorry that you are ill and please let me know if there is anything I could do to help.
God Bless
M.
My daughter is turning 4 in September and has been asking for a dress up / makeover party all year since she went to one last year. When it is smaller it is more memorable. Take lots of pictures!
After reading Laurie S.'s response it reminded me of a student at my school that lost his mom last year. This year for Christmas he told his teacher that he wanted to hear his mom's voice. If you sing your dd to sleep, you may want to record yourself singing them so she will always have a connection to you. When my dad died I had is voice on my cell phone but it got lost when I was in the hospital having my 1st baby.
I sincerely hope that you are around for many more birthdays!
Dear A.,
I am so sorry to hear that your health is compromised and you are worried about how many more you will share with her.
I am assuming your goal is to create memories that she will cherish and be able to hold dear long after you are gone. Honestly, I cannot remember my 4th birthday other than the bear birthday cake that I have seen in pictures. Instead of trying to create a big event, I suggest creating a warm event that you and your family will truly enjoy. I also suggest recording your thoughts about her in a diary to include the kinds of things she loves right now, to the stories of your thoughts while you were pregnant with her and her delivery. The things she did when she was little and the wishes and dreams and prayers that you have for her.
This is something that she will not have now - but it will be a priceless treasure for her in the future. Do something to record your voice so she can take comfort in that one day hopefully many, many years from now.
This is the kind of treasure she will be able to hold onto during those hard days at college, the dark days after a heartbreak and share with her children too!
I wish you the very best and a very happy birthday to your daughter!
S. M
I would love to host a great party for you. I can do Princess Tea Parties, and really have a Princess show up, Spa party and more. If you would like more information please let me know.
Oh my, I am crying as I write this. Bless your heart. First of all I am praying for you so that you are around for many more birthdays. For this one, I am in favor of simple. Kids will not remember everything, but one stand out part will stick with them. Maybe a favorite theme or special cake. I think makeovers might be a little grown up, but you could do a mom and daughter day of beauty together. Whatever you do, get help so that she can remember you by her side for the fun! {{{hugs}}}
Hi A., I am sorry to hear of your health, but I wanted to share something so sweet that I offer in my business, Noah's Ark Animal Workshops. I come to you help hand stuff animals with you, similar to the place in the mall, but there are no machines, and I don't use electricity. So, this is very personal, and very fun. And, we have 30 second sound chips that you can personalize messages for your daughter and put inside the animal - to keep your voice forever (and the message) - no matter what happens to you. You can do this for your hubby, and as many relatives as you want, and then you live in your voice with them forever - inside that precious animal that they hand stuffed. I do this with a lot of soldiers that go off to war, and they leave their voice behind for their families, and they take their families voices with them - all inside a soft, lovey plush to hold onto during those awful times.
Please let me know if this is something that would help you during your party with your daughter. www.StuffInDallas.com
Best of luck~L.
I'm sorry to hear about your illness.
You got lots of great suggestions. I thought I'd share something I did a few weeks ago. My daughter turned 5 last month and I did something very simple that made a huge impact on her. She talked about it for weeks!
I created a colorful cake out of construction paper and put a big "5" in the middle with five candles on top and then handwrote "Happy Birthday! Love Mommy, Daddy, Princess & Tommy" (our cats). I taped it to her door and taped colorful, curled ribbons to the bottom of the "plate" so they hung down her door. I just used stuff I had in the house and did it after she went to bed the night before her birthday. It took about 15 minutes to cut and glue everything together, and it was a surprise when she opened her bedroom door on her birthday.
God Bless you and your family.
I want to say my favorite birthday for my child was her 4th birthday at "My Gym". The party is centered around the child, making them the center of attention. My family continues to talk about it to this day. They do a great job managing the party so all you do is soak in the fun and the experience. I would do this party only if you opt to invite other friends. Small intimate parties are fun as well.
I'm so sorry! Truly sorry.
I think I would make my decision based on what you think her life will be like when you're gone. I'm not trying to be morose, but that's how I would decide. The person who will be caring for her will be in charge of birthdays at that point. Will they throw her a big party or is this the last chance for one? You know what I mean?
I guess that I would also consider my legacy with her. Do you want to be a part of this party? I would. I would want myself in every photo. I would want her to remember planning every single detail with me. I think I would hire a party host, whether that is someone that comes to your house and does the makeover stuff for you or a place that you go to that does the makeover stuff for you. Either way, I would want to be involved in the festivities, not running around filling up juice cups. You know what I mean?
Also, I have a four year old and he was VERY clear on what he wanted this year. It had to be "Transformers." Since he's never seen that movie/cartoon, that meant a cake with the robots on it and party favors/decor centered around it. And he was happy! So maybe whatever theme she chooses, you can just do silly things around it.
Also, are you scrapbooking these memories for her?
I love planning my kids' and my friends' kids' parties. If you would like help coming up with ideas, just send me a message. It's not something I do for money. I just love to come up with fun ideas.
Best of luck. I'm really truly sorry that this is something that you have to worry about. I would have the same concerns in your situation though.
She's 4 and probably has some ideas of her own. Why don't you ask her what she would like and start from there. Mine was very specific (even at 3), when asked, what sort of cake, which friends, where, etc he wanted his party. I expect yours is equally as opinionated. ;
I'm so sorry to hear about your health. That is truly a frightening thought and I hope you end up with many more birthdays and memories together. You might consider a party at a place where they can help you and you can spend more time with the kids and guests. Plus, clean up is minimal. The last party we did was at Paradise Pond in Grapevine. The ladies took care of everything. Even at a place like Pump it Up, the "hosts" serve the cake, wrangle the kids, etc. and it takes some stress off the parents. Of course, this also drives up the cost. Sometimes that's worth it though so that you can remember things other than cleaning up floors, serving food, etc. Just a thought to consider.
Good luck. I'm sure whatever you plan will be fabulous. These are 4 yr olds and sometimes it's the simplest of things that really make things memorable. I think we project our ideas on them. We were at a party recently, the Dad had just lost his job and they were tight on funds. It was about 6 kids probably. They just had a sprinkler party with cake and a few snacks. They played musical chairs, had a treasure hunt in the back yard for phoney pirate coins, drew with chalk, etc. My son STILL tells me how that was the best party EVER. He's been to all the really expensive ones too, so he had some other parties to compare it to.
Good luck and try not to stress yourself out too much. Relax and it will be fine.
My goodness !! First let me say that I am prayful for you and your family, that you will have many more birthdays with your daugher. If your 4 year old is anything like mine just ask them what they want!! Give her the choice or maybe you could do a litte of both. A big party with all of her favorite things (the works!!) and then another day take just her,her sister,her cousin and you to go get a manicure/pedicure and then a ladies lunch or something? I know that Montgomery Street Antique Mall has a nice lunch and if you wanted a little something different I think the Ashton Hotel downtown does Tea. God bless
Hi A., It sounds like you have a wonderful day planned for your little girl! I can't imagine you being able to do anything else to make her feel more special on her day.
Hello Autum,
I pray that you will be healthy and that you'll see many more of your daughters' birthdays. Whatever you decide to do, find someone to take pictures for you and to make sure that you are in many of the pictures/short videos. the makeover sounds fun. good luck, have fun and God Bless! ~C.~
I think you shoud make it a more a girlie thing with you and her family memebers and with her girl cousins and sister, even aunts at that. Pull your old jewlery and hats and have a blast!
If later on you want to include the guys maybe have them over for something cheap towards the evening time...hot dogs. maybe put old Christmas light and decorate
Hope this helps.
Hi, A.. You'll never get all the what ifs answered, so give up right now! :) Life is too short to stress about doing it a different way!
For a special and memorable occasion, all your daughter wants is you and time with you and you to make much of her. Invite those close to her by all means, but all kids really want is their mom and to know that mom loves them.
In fact, the less money you spend, the better. Make do with what you've got and with what you make--for her or together is even better.
Baking a cake with mom, wearing mom's jewelry, laughing with mom--those are the memories that last.
God be with you and bless and heal you!
~A.
My suggestion is not so much for this birthday but for those that you sadly might not be here for. I have a few families that I am friends with that have dealt with a death of a parent. In both cases, the ill parent left cards for milestones for the child/children (big b-days (13, sweet 16..), graduation, wedding, first child born and so on). they also left a lot of videos - message to the children and some with them and the children in them playing. I found the idea truly touching and just thinking of it brings me to tears.
Blessings!
If you're concerned with not having many more birthdays to share with your daughter, (which is making me tear up as I type), then I would make every effort to create special memories involving you and those who are closest to her. It will mean more to her as she grows up and reflects back. Have a tea party or "spa day" at your house. I would also consider hiring a photographer to capture the memories of the day and perhaps to take mommy daughter photos. My friend does this type of photography at an extremely reasonable price. Her name is Lindsey Spraggins. She does beautiful work and is one of the nicest peoople I have ever known. Her website is www.lindseyspragginsphotography.com. Hope this helps and God Bless.
Good Morning,
My suggestion would be to keep it with whom she loves. Do something you haven't done, something memorable, definately have someone video tape it (other than you since you want YOU to be in the video). Another thought is to video tape yourself with your thoughts on her and how much you love her etc. Have you thought about putting together special things for her future birthday? The ones that you might not be there for? I am so sorry that you even have to think about these things. I will pray for you.
I'm so sorry you're ill. I'm sure you're heart is aching. I used to go all out for my 6 year old son until he asked for a party at home after his 2 year old sister had two parties at home. I thought bigger with more friends was better. Turns out he enjoyed the parties at home with the house decorated just for him better. I'd definitely video tape the event and take a lot of photos. A scrapbook would be such a nice lasting gift if you have the strength. Good luck and lots of prayers.
D.
SAVE THE EXTRA MONEY
Do something with those close to her, much more
memorable and special for both of you
she is not goning to miss doing something with
people she doesn't even know and the more people included means more costs.
