Help on Daycare Transition

Hi L.,

First off, do not feel guilty!! You are going back to work to make sure your son has everything he needs in financial support. You are doing it for him. I had to put both of my kids in daycare when I had to go back to work after 12 weeks maternity leave. I would have loved to stay home with them, but financially, it was impossible. AND... I really think they learned way more at daycare than I ever could have done for them. Between learning their letters,reading, socializing, sharing, etc. they had a much busier day in daycare then I ever could have provided them!

Kids adjust so quickly and I really think it's harder on the moms and dads than it is on the kids. You may find that your son will cry when you drop him off, but I bet anything that he is fine within minutes of you leaving... It will be worse for you then him... If he has a lovey or favorite toy, make sure you bring it with him. You can also make a little photo album with pics of you and other loved ones for him to take with him... then he can look at you whenever he wants.

Good luck going back to work!

I had the same problem. It is harder on us then it is on the kids. You have to remember that if you are positive about the daycare (I call mine school) then your kids will be positive about it too.

Your daycare provider should be prepared to spend time with you every day to let you know how your son is adjusting.

She should provide a daily sheet telling you about his day including things he ate, times he was changed and napped, activities she did with the children, ect.

if your son is not happy you will know!
good luck

I was in the exact same situation. I stayed home with my first baby for nine months before going back to work and left her at a home based daycare.

The transition was hard for both of us, and she wouldn't nap for about 3 weeks (she'd just cry and the daycare provider didn't want her to cry too long, so she'd get her...she was staying awake all day). I'm a teacher, so I'd pick her up around 3:30 and she always seemed happy, but tired, and she'd sleep the entire way home and thensome...I'd let her sleep about an hour. But, it got better the longer she was there. At nine months she hadn't really chosed a "security object" yet, but if your little guy has, you might want to bring that. Even if he hasn't, just guess and send him with a stuffed animal or blanket that he likes. You might also send him with a toy or two that's familiar. Be positive, smile, talk calmly...he's taking his cues from you somewhat...when you talk about it, or go there, drop off/pick up. Lastly, keep your goodbyes short...tell him you love him and you'll be back soon and then leave. You can make a deal with the daycare person to call her or have her call you within an hour to see how he did. She'll distract him and get him onto something else before you know it.

Be ready for the transition...for both of you. It'll turn out fine if you just give it some time. Go with your gut and don't be afraid to ask your daycare provider about things. When you're home with him, enjoy your mornings and evenings as by being prepared with all your other work/home tasks. I used to pack the car up the night before with my things and my baby's things so we could enjoy breakfast and getting dressed etc. You need so much extra stuff...diapers, wipes, bottles, formula, sippy cups, binky, food, change of clothes or two, etc...plus whatever you need for your job. I had a list posted near the door to help me remember it all!

Good luck and remember that it will get better, easier, even fun for both of you...assuming you have quality daycare.

Hi, I actually work in a daycare. I know it is hard to leave your little one since he has been with you during your daycare. but honestly i think it begins with the "right" daycare and the teachers, have you taken your child to visit the daycare he is going to and watch him interact w/the other children and also watch how he is with his teachers and how they respond to him and vice versa. Your son will do fine and hopefully you will to. The easiest way i think you should do which i have seen this work at my center is to like i said before have him visit (30min..the first day, 1hour the next and so forth until one day you leave him in there and YOU leave the room and see how he responds to that and when his first day of school starts he should be good to go and so will you. i hope this helps you and good luck. K. R., from Lowell.

I've been in your place too. I know now from experience that it is harder on us than it is on the little one. He will definitely need to adjust to someone else caring for him, but if you have a good daycare, I think he will soon learn that this person cares about him too and that Mommy will always come and get him.

When I did it, the provider did fill out a sheet each day that told me eveything, including poops and pees, feeding amounts and times, activites, etc. I really enjoyed that and think that it helped.

Good luck to you. Millions of people send their children to daycare. It is just an adjustment. Hang it there, it will get easier.