I asked the question a LONG time ago, but its one of my favorite things to talk about with my friends and hear there stories.
From time to time I hear my self saying things to my kids that I never ever thought I would find my self saying. Take this for example: a few Christmases ago my husband was hanging Christmas lights and set the hammer down for just a sec our daughter (2 at the time) pick it up. Looked at her brother and gave a little smile before taking off after him Hammer High in the air. I got the hammer away from her before she took more than a few steps and firmly said "We Don t chase our brother with a hammer"This one is my favorite one that I have ever said. When my son was little we were out and got him one of those little ice cream cups. He was trying to eat it in the car but it was too frozen. I looked back at him and saw the little man (must have been about 5 at the time) trying to stuff it down his pants. With out missing a beat I said "Son, we don’t put Ice Cream down our pants". I still get a good giggle at this one.
Never when I thought about having kids did I ever thing that I would say things like this! What kinda things have you found your self saying to you kids? Or have your kids said to you. Or worse yet when you heard your mothers words coming out of your own mouth....eek (lol)
LOL just said an other one. My daughter went to the potty and took off all her clothing (Why i don't know). I tolled her to go get dressed. She cant be running around Naked. She looked at me and with a very serous tone of voice she said "I am not. I am walking around naked"
My sis has a LONG list of the ones she's heard over here written down that I don't even notice anymore.
My 2 all time favorites:
No riding the dog! / How many times have I told you?!? NO riding the dog!
No... We NEVER eat people. No. Not even people we don't like.
My strangest one for my kids has to be, "We do not chase cars!"
I still remember the time that I said to my niece, "Get your unicycle off that roof!" I never thought I would have those words come out of my mouth! :)
Fun question! :)
Fun question!
My son has always been very literal and I have learned (the hard way) that I have to be VERY specific with him at times...
came home one day (he was maybe 11) and him and the neighbor kid were lighting matches into the bonfire pit. I said, you can't have a fire if we're not home. He responded, "we're not, we're just lighting matches."
Came home another time and he and my daugher were attempting to shoot at a bird in the front yard...through the front window. I said you're not allowed to have the bb gun out if we're not home. He responded, "it's not out, it's in the house."
When he was in 2nd grade and my daugher was in kindergarten he picked her up and they walked to daycare a block every day. It was her first day of Daisies so I told him to pick her up at her classroom, take her to the cafeteria and then go to daycare. He did EXACTLY what I told him to do...unfortunately, I never told him to LEAVE her at Daisies...lol!
When my son asks a "why do" question about human beings (as opposed to animals or buildings or cars...) doing very natural things like walking, being polite or other mundane activities--and most likely questions I've answered before, my answer is silly: "We do because we do because we doobie doobie do."
Utter nonsense, but it gets the job done!
This was kind of a sad situation, but at least I was able to laugh a little bit. I was on the phone with my mother, explaining that my then 4-year-old son needed a heart operation.
My son started crying in the background, and I stopped to tell him "It's OK if there's a hole in your heart", not even thinking I was saying something unusual. My mother on the other end of the phone conversation was really alarmed.
My son was actually using a heart-shaped cookie cutter to cut out pieces of lunch meat, and he was upset because the shape tore.
Oh, I love this!
Me to them:
-Son, we don't pee on your sister.
***In the bath, of course.
-Why is there a train spike AND string cheese in your pants?
***Sadly, that was AFTER it went thru the wash :(
-Freeze! Put the weapon down!
***Of course they are play weapons! I say some variation of this one SO often, it had to make the list!!
-Why would you put a rock up your nose?
***Almost an ER visit, right there!
There are SO many more...wish I could think of them...these were just the highlights!
And my most favorite thing one of my kids has said to me was:
-No, I don't want to have Bear feet!
***I told my oldest (when he was @ 2y/o that it was OK, he could come outside with bare feet...he looked confused and then told me he didn't want to have 'bear feet'...he thought his feet would turn into bear feet, Ha! Still makes me smile even after all these years!
Everything I say to my kids is odd by most definitions. I am the mom who corrects their usage of a swear word rather than the word itself. :) Swear if you must but for crying out loud do it right!
My ex is not a nice guy and just about always makes my one son cry. We were at the older daughter's graduation dinner. College by the way. :p So here is my daughter, "It just isn't a family gathering until dad makes Andy cry." It's funny because it's true.
See none of your examples would ever come out of my mouth. I would just yell pick something different because the hammer will leave marks I am in no mood to explain. Not sure about the ice cream but more likely than not I would just have offered a better method of defrosting it.
I am odd, my kids are odd, this works for us. :)
My dd was doing something I forgot what and she couldn't understand how I saw her do it because I wasn't turned towards her. I told her I had eyes in the back of my head. I have been telling her this since she was 3. The other day we were coming home from school and she said Mommy look at that pretty Willow tree. I said I can't right now I'm driving. She said well just use the eyes in the back of your head to see it. I could only laugh.
We've struggled with our 4 year old DD going poop on the potty - she has had a tendency to just hold it in and then end up constipated because she gets afraid to just go poop. So we've been managing with regular small doses of Miralax to keep it softer, plus monitoring what she eats and rewarding her for poops on the potty. Last month we were on vacation, including a trip to Disneyland and she had not pooped in a few days, so she really needed to go. My husband ended up telling her, "You need to poop before we go to Disneyland today!"
A friend of mine called me the other day laughing hysterically about what she had just yelled out her slider door to her children. They (boy and girl) were outside jumping on the trampoline. It went from jumping to wrestling so she opens the slider and yells "E, GET OFF YOUR SISTER". She is just happy no neighbors were outside to hear.
Something I have to often repeat to my 4 y/o is "No, honey, you cannot bring the chickens in the house"
I don't remember what the subject was, but just a few months ago I was trying to impress some sort of lesson on my son, and I said:
"It isn't funny, even if it is funny..."
They haven't let that one go yet...
Oh... and just a few weeks after my daughter got an ipod for Xmas, she was incessantly bringing it to me to put in the password so she could download new apps. They were free ones, but the kids don't have the password, so they literally cannot download anything without me seeing what it is they are downloading. :) Anyway, she had been bringing me the dang thing 7/8 times a day and she happened to come into the kitchen while I was trying to prepare dinner, up to my elbows in fresh veggies and splashed water... I said to her: "Don't come at me with your downloads!" LOL
Then later that night at dinner, my son starts saying how "one day when we are having our family reunion at Denny's, we'll have to remember how Mom said "Don't come at me with your downloads!... " It was so funny on so many levels! Who has family reunions at Dennys?! What 12 yr old even talks about the future of the family reunion?!
When my daughter was a preteen and starting to go to school dances and group movie dates I had many talks with her about the tricks boys will pull to get her to do things she wasnt ready for. One of the things I told her is "all boys lie." I gave her examples of how I had been manipulated or pressured when I was young. It got to be a joke between us. When she would leave the house - do you have your backpack, dont forget sunscreen, and remember ...all boys lie! :) She's 19 now and I was trying to have a serious discussion with her yesterday about values and asked her if she knew what we stand for as a family. She said...........what? "ALL boys lie?" lol poor kid
I don't care if that blueberry tasted yucky, don't wipe it on the TV screen!
