Here is my deal. I felt our child was pretty well behaved. But ANY time she misbehaved, or started to have a meltdown, I handled her. Either with
"Do you need to go outside?" "Do we need to leave?" or, "ok, we are leaving".. Yes, EVERY time.
She knew I was serious.. I did not care if I had a full basket of groceries, I was not willing to put others around us through one of her fits.. or attitude.
I knew she was young or little and she could be tired, or hungry or whatever, but again, that is not anyone else's fault around us and so I was not going to be using that as an excuse.. ever..
She is now an adult now and this summer I have read quite a few of the questions and comments from moms here on the site and my daughter is also shocked at the lack of parenting, the excuses and the explanations for allowing young children to have a meltdown in public and the parents just expect everyone else to put up with it.
She has said, "I cannot believe they let their kids get away with that stuff. I do not remember anyone's parents allowing their kids to do that." She is only 21 so it is not like this was back in the dark ages..
Justify away, but do not be shocked when your children continue to behave like this and know you are not going to do anything about it.. and other children are around you acting just like this with their parents are making excuses..
We all understand children have meltdowns, do not feel well, have an off day, But YOU need to deal with that and not make the rest of the world have to deal with it.
It is just part of being a parent, missing out on activities, not being a part of everything and that plans will have to change.. We all know this when we got pregnant..