Looking for Advice on How to Deal with a 9 Year Old Who Still Wets the Bed?

Please help me I'am the mother of two boys 8&4 and my 8 year old still wets the beds and I've tried everything what can I do to help him stop wetting the bed?

My daughter is 7 and has the same problem. She is a sound sleeper. I took her to the doctor and the doctor put her on a pill. I dont remember what the pill is called, but I know it helped her bladder trigger her brain for her to wake up. Unfortunatly this pill doesn't work all that well for my daughter because she will not go to the bathroom even after she wakes up. It may work for you son. But like someone else said, you should see the doctor, he may have some issues with his bladder.

there are medical conditions that describe this - its not his fault. ask your pediatrician or go online- there are plenty of suceesful therapies out there... there are sheets you can buy that will awaken him when he begins to urinate so he can stop and go to the bathroom, eventuallly training him to get up ahead of time.
I would try very hard not to make him feel guilty about this - in most cases it is not the child's fault and the feelings of embarassment and guilt are already much too prevelant in the child, they can do lasting emotional harm if not dealt with properly.

i was a bedwetter until i a little over 8yrs old. slept like a log and apparently my body was not "telling" me to wake up when needed to go and my bladder wouldn't hold it (surprisingly i have a very good bladder today even after two kids!!). talk to the doctor. i believe it's not a matter of wanting to wet the bed... i always didn't want to do it (missed out on a lot of sleep overs!!) but couldn't help it. i'm actually not really sure how i stopped (can't ask mom she died two years ago and my dad has no clue either) i do remember though going to the doctors alot for it. so call the doc. Also bedwetting tends to be genetic (according to my doc). my son will be three this halloween and he is fully potty trained... except at night (which i know may take a while) but he is a very heavy sleeper just like i was and i'm afraid we may have issues with him. he was very very easily potty trained but can't help it at night. for me (and him) all drinks would stop after 6pm and go to potty right before bed but that really didn't make a differnce. and i also heard that milk relaxes the bladder therefore not helping the bladder hold it. The only thing NOT to do is scold him or punish him in any way for it. TRUST me from personal experience it is very embarassing (especially when friends find out) and it is not something that you WANT to happen and it's more than just telling yourself not to do it... i too hid clothes, sheets, etc. talk to your doctor!!

My son is 8.5 and still wets the bed, too. I haven't made an issue of it, but the other day he asked me to call the pediatrician, so I just did. The nurse is going to call me back. In the meantime, he wears pull-ups. That way, he doesn't get it all over the place.

My son is just a very deep sleeper. I'll post what the nurse says when she calls back, but in the meantime, they have pull-ups in the diaper section that are for big kids.

Hi,
My little brother had this problem. My parents tried everything from not letting him drink after a certain time, to getting a buzzer that would attach to his underwear to let him know to wake up..which he slept right through. He was also a deep sleeper, and would hide his pj's, etc. He dealt with this, I believe, until he was about 11 or 12. My only suggestion would be to maybe get him an alarm clock. Set it for sometime in the middle of the night so he can get up & go to the bathroom. Then maybe his body will eventually set to the clock by itself, and he won't have to use the clock anymore. That is my only suggestion, other then keep giving him encouragement that many kids have the same problem & he will get passed it. Good luck!

I have a 7 year old daughter who wears pull-ups to bed because my mom lets her drink too much; when I say that she should stop drinking after a certain time of night but she doesn't listen to me. Your son is probably embarrassed to wear pull-ups to bed because he feels that he's growing up and doesn't need them. I wish my daughter was the same way. He might eventually grow out of it; just give it a little more time. Did his father have that problem? If so; it could be hereditary. Good luck and Take care! Best wishes!

I have a 13 year old who still wets the bed sometimes. My 11 year old, 8 year old and 6 year wet the bed almost every night. I had my oldest child tested repeatedly as a child and the only thing I was told was that it was normal. The muscles that hold the bladder are weaker in some children and the average age that children quit bedwetting is about 12 years of age. I have a friend whose son was almost 14 when he quit. The important thing is to not punish them because they really cannot help it.
Bedwetting is often heriditary. I was a bedwetter until the age of 12 and I remember the frustration of never being able to sleepover at anyone's home. Today parents have pull-ups as an option and we keep them at our home because it is humiliating for an older child to wake up with wet sheets. Though it is frustrating I thank God that it is nothing life threatening and something the children will eventually outgrow. It is important to reassure your child that they are not bad and that they will not always have this problem. I have found that bedwetting can cause poor self esteem in children if not properly handled. Hope this helps. :-)

Have you taken him to the Dr.to get this checked out? He might have a bladder problem. My Friend had the same issuees with her son and she finally took him to the doctors and come to find out it he had a small weak bladder. he was put some meds and now 1 year later he has no issues with bed wetting. She was a little hesitant about putting him on the meds but they worked and now he doesn't need them any more.

I'm not sure what to say, except I go throught the same thing. I have a 16 yr old who has an occasional accident as well as an 11 yr old who also does. My doctor doesnt' say much, jsut to tell them to help clean it up. It is very hard on them as they really can't control what they do when they are sleeping.

I read that one in every senior class(not grade, but each class) still has this problem.

I heard chiropractic care can help with this issue, keeping the nerves from being 'pinched' and interupting the signals. I will be giving this a try as soon as I find out how my issurance is.

Love you children, that is all you can do, God will take care of the rest.

I had the same problem with my son who is now 15 and wetted the bed till he was 11 there really isnt much you can do.My son is a very deep sleeper and even though your body lets you know you have to pee during the night they just cant wake themselves up to do it,once they start to go through puberty they will stop wetting the bed.

My daughter will be 9 in april and up until 5 months ago, she was still wetting the bed. I talked to her pediatritian about this several times over the years and finally gave in to a nose spray called DDAVP. It's a miracle spray. She has not wet 1x since she started the spray. 1 squirt up the nose before bed. I don't really like medicating my child but she has refused to wear pull ups since she was about 3 yrs old. When I made her wear them, she would take them off or pull them down to her knees leaving them useless. I was getting her up in the middle of the night to "go" when I worked 2nd shift (around 12:30am when I arrived home) which wasn't too bad. Then I became a single mom and was forced to worked 1st shift. I was in bed sleeping at the time I use to get her up to "go" so bed wetting became a big problem again. That's when I had no other choice other than the spray to keep my sanity lol. Dry nights are wonderful mornings :) Her only problem is that she is a very extremely deep sleeper. She was checked for everything else. Also, before the DDAVP, I would stop her drinks after 6pm which was an issue because she always became thirsty and a sip was not enough for her. Now, she can drink how she wants to and still has no wetting issues.

I have the same problem with my almost 9 yr old. I have had to JH and they have done testing and everything just ot make sure that there is nothing medically wrong with her. My son who is 8 has kidney disease and they thought she might to but she doesnt. We had no problem all summer she had no accidents nothing but when school started she started wetting the bed again. We have done the pull ups and wrapping the mattress in plastic because we cant afford to buy any more. We wake her every two to three hrs to make sure she gets up most of the time she has already wet the bed. She also will hide her wet clothing in the closet with clean clothing or under the bed. the drs have said that she is jsut lazy and we should try to get her something for not wetting the bed it worked for a few days but that was it. we even put her in counsuling we thought she might be having problems at school but even thats not helping. when we ask her she tells I dont know and goes on about her way. She doesnt get anything to drink after 5 pm and goes to bed at 8pm we have to watch her constantly and it makes no differnce. take him to his peds dr and see if they recomend that he needs further testing he might have a kidney disease or they might beable to put him on a med that helps reduce his urine through the night. My 7 yr old was on it and he has done great.

I have the same problem with my 9-year-old daughter. She is an extremely deep sleeper. I haven't taken her to the dr because her dad's brother had the same problem, and it stopped by age 11. What I do with my daughter is (a)she has a waterproof fabric mat on her bed, (b)we cut drinks off at 8pm (she goes to bed at 9), and (c) we usually get her up about 2 hours after she first goes to sleep. That usually does the trick for the rest of the night. Hope this helps! Good luck!

If you didn't talk to his doctor try that first. There might be a problem.

He may not like this idea but it might be a start. Get a potty and put it in his room at night as close to his bed as you can. This way if he wakes up and needs to go he can use that. This will let you know if he is waking up or not but just afraid to get out of bed. Or if he is such a deep sleep and doesn't know he even went till morning. Good luck.

Hi, C. - I agree with the group, I think it's best you take your son to his pediatrician. I had a family member who had similar problems and it turned out that he had some issue with the tubes leading from his bladder to his kidneys. It was a relatively easy fix and they're so happy they had it checked out now.

This is going to sound crazy. But I know it worked for me and the advice came from a doctor to my mother when I was little. I really wanted to stop and was also very embarressed by the whole thing. The doctor said to think of some reward that would be really meaningful to your child, like that they would think about during the day occasionally, and say when you stop wetting your bed for X months you will get XYZ. Don't get mad, but make it seem like something you both are working towards...for me it was the weirdest thing (according to my mom). I stopped right away and it got my brother to stop sucking his thumb too! I think it has to do with being conscious of the reward during waking ours as a positive thing as opposed to only the shame that you don't want to think about...somehow gives them control of the situation.

Worth a try!

Hi C.. I'm new to this site, and this is why i really wanted to join! questions like this.. you really should get him checked out from his doctor.. not neccesarily bladder issues, but how is he attention wise?? i ask that because my son was having attention problems, and then starting wetting the bed all of a sudden.. i had him checked out COMPLETELY by his doctor, i mean exams, tests, evaluations, behavior specialist, everything! and his doctor came to the conclusion that it could be adhd. i didnt think that that sounded right, but that is one side effect. has he ALWAYS wetted the bed? or did he just start wetting the bed out of nowhere and now you are having problems with him stopping?? i guess that is it for now. but good luck with everything, just like everyone else said, dont scold him, reward him!

I wouldn't worry about it, but don't ignore it.

My brother wet the bed till he was almost 10. My husband wet the bed till he was about 12. I have a 14 year old daughter who still wets the bed, and a 12 year old son who has accidents every few months. My Mom told me one of my Aunts wet the bed till she was a teenager also.

It might be something you aren't aware of, and with the fears, it sound emotional. I highly suggest taking him to a therapist to take about his fears and hopes. It might give him some relief, and it might help you to work with the therapist on what is best to do for your son. It helped me with Tanner. Seeing a neurologist is also beneficial. If you son is open, they will test for other issues (health) and help you with a behavior modification plan.

Most children grow out of it. It isn't totally uncommon. Letting your son know he is normal is best. Comfort is the best thing you can give him.